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 Posted: Sun Mar 14, 2010 5:07 pm
She had long stopped waiting for him to walk through the door. Whether it was because he was still hurting over Jude, too busy, or what, she had decided to stop waiting. She had begged the nurses, early on when she was still watching ships out the window, to call her parents; her father, looking ruffled she thought, had explained and when she had been switched to percoset she had asked Su Ling. They'd been told, she said, and two of them had come by. She had been pretty under, Su Ling had explained patiently when Elke was panicking because she couldn't remember. No one expected her to remember anything for s**t. So she knew that Grayson knew that she was okay, even if she didn't remember seeing Dad and Pop at all.
She stopped waiting a few days in, settled in instead to be lectured by the Captain, confronted by Castor, guilt-tripped into medicine by Scylla, given homework by Giselle: Everyone, but her brother.
When someone entered the room, she didn't look up from the laptop screen, assumed it was Su Ling back to check on her stitches again. They were going to cut them out later in the evening, since her chest had healed so evenly. Apparently it wouldn't even scar. So she tucked her headphones a little above her ears and paused the movie, eyes still on the screen. She looked bored. She looked fine. "So do you think Inigo became the Dread Pirate Roberts right off, or was there a, how do you say it. Waiting period?"
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Posted: Sat Mar 20, 2010 7:59 pm
Grayson knew that he was a bad person.
Sometimes, you couldn't escape it. No one was a good person all the time, and no one should be expected to be. Still, that was no real excuse for not seeing Elke in the hospital. He'd known she was in there, had heard from his parents and Tristan both, and yet he'd still held back. Waited.
Maybe he hadn't wanted to see her really hurt. Maybe he hadn't wanted to be reminded that he wasn't there for her, even though he couldn't possibly always be there for her. Maybe it didn't matter why he hadn't been there at all.
He hoped it mattered that he was there now.
Resting a hand against the doorway, he looked at her, traced the familiar lines of her profile as he took in a quiet breath. She looked fine. She looked just fine, and that eased some of the ache in his heart, pulled some of the tension from his shoulders. Still, there was no excuse.
"Probably right away," he said slowly, in that calm, easygoing tone that he always used. "Wouldn't want people to get suspicious."
He eased into the room, dressed in a pair of skinny jeans that had been somehow more snug the last time he'd worn them, and a sweater that was having trouble staying up at the elbows anymore.
Violet eyes held a wealth of apology, affection, and shame, but all he could say was, "Hi, sweetheart."
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Posted: Sat Mar 20, 2010 8:57 pm
Perhaps it was to his credit that for a moment, all she did was nod knowingly; his voice was so familiar, such a constant in her life that she didn't even register it as out-of-place. Then it seemed to register that the voice was her brother's and her hands paused on the keyboard. In exaggerated slow-motion, she turned to look up at him, and then--
She smiled. Wide, bright, the kind of smile that she usually reserved for the friends she was introducing to Grayson, or when he said something that made her particularly happy. "Grayson," she chimed, "You're here!" Elke was relocating her laptop and the rolling table it had been on (it was painfully obvious that she was still on the rebound--if she bent, it was at her hips, not at the waist as would probably be more comfortable). She smoothed the blue cotton pajamas she was wearing, straightened the cuffs--and the second he got close enough, she snagged his hands and yanked, probably almost dislocating his shoulders in her enthusiasm. Grayson tumbled onto the bed next to her and she hugged him, tightly.
Then she let go, her expression creased into an unhappy frown. "Grayson, you feel skinnier than before," she said, poking him gently in the ribs.
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Posted: Mon Mar 22, 2010 7:19 pm
He'd half-expected to be pulled into the bed, so he managed to orient himself enough not to slam into Elke. She was moving gingerly when she wasn't hauling him around, and that made him almost frown, but he quickly smoothed his features back out. His sister didn't need to see him frown, not under any circumstances, but especially not when she was recovering in a hospital bed.
He slipped his arms around her gently, pulling her into a brief hug, almost too soft to really be contact, and sighed. He was skinnier, but that was to be expected when your appetite was suddenly cut in half. It was a shame, too, because Grayson loved to eat. Still, he didn't want her worrying.
Infusing cheer into his voice that he didn't feel, mostly because his heart hurt at the sight of her in a hospital bed, he quipped, "I've finally started eating less cheeseburgers. You should be proud."
Reaching out, he thumbed her cheek, grinning. "Don't frown, Elke. You'll get wrinkles." After a moment, though, a sadness began to creep into his eyes.
He'd never really been able to hide anything in his eyes.
"How are you feeling?"
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Posted: Mon Mar 22, 2010 10:37 pm
She flopped (well, more like carefully settled; her side was almost better but she was still a little tender) down, her head in Grayson's lap. It was her favored position for Avoiding the Serious, because here she could pretend she didn't see how sad he was. "I will never get wrinkles because I take care of my face."
Then, in a worried tone, she asked, "I don't look too stupid, do I?" Her hair had grown out--almost half an inch of auburn hair now, warm and woodsy. The ends didn't flip upwards anymore, but curled around her chin, lay in faint waves on his thigh.
"But Grayson, you like cheeseburgers," she said finally, her green eyes doe-wide. "I don't want you to stop eating something you like." It wasn't even just a 'lost weight' skinny it was 'scary skinny'. When she got out, she was making her brother a sandwich and he was going to eat it and she would not leave until he did! It would be a big sandwich, too. The right size for her brother.
She reached up to pull at his pigtail, tangled up her fingers in his curls. Her serious frown was almost humorous. "I feel just fine, except I still have these stupid stitches. They're going to take them out soon, because everything is all closed up!..." After a long moment of contemplation, she added, "Only I can't have cheeseburgers for a while. I am stuck to bland food for a week, then I can eat normal food, but no spicy for two whole weeks. That means no curry!" Her green eyes were wide with exaggerated dismay. "No curry, Grayson, how am I going to survive ever?"
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Posted: Fri Mar 26, 2010 2:06 pm
Grayson let her talk, as he was wont to, lifting a hand to stroke it gently through her hair as he listened. No matter what happened in his personal life, no matter what plagued him when he slept, something as simple as spending time with his family could center him. This was true for his parents and Tristan, of course, but a little more true for Elke, because she was not only family but she was Zodiac; she understood things that he could never share with them, and she'd been through what he had. It reminded him that he couldn't let himself get tangled up in his own troubles, couldn't neglect the rest of the world, because there were others just like him who were fighting through all the same things and still managing to keep their heads above water.
So, he just smiled, and when she bemoaned the lack of spicy food, he made a dutifully sympathetic noise. "That's a long time without curry... we'll have to find something yummy for you to eat in the meantime." He paused. "I'll cook you something, if you like."
Grayson was actually a decent hand at cooking. Tristan could burn water, but Grayson had been taken aside by Pop when he was about seven and taught the basics, and after that, he'd just picked it up as he went along. It was something he did when there was no one else in the house and he was hungry, or when something catastrophic was happening -- Pop was sick -- or on very, very rare occasions. He'd been told many times that if he actually cooked more often and tried to improve, he could be a more than decent chef, but he had no motivation or desire to be better.
What he cooked fed him, and it tasted all right. To try to improve beyond that seemed... pointless. He didn't ever need to make truly gourmet dishes. It didn't occur to him to ever pursue a career centered around food. Hell, he was too lazy to put effort into something like that when the bare minimum of what he already knew was quite good enough.
His hand continued its absent patting of her hair, and he added, "And you look beautiful, Elke. You remind me that I need a hair cut... I'll probably go do that soon."
Soon meant within the week, maybe, but that was how he operated.
"Dad and Pop want you to come visit, when you're able," he said suddenly, and added, "Tristan too. Me too. We can have dinner and a movie night, or something."
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Posted: Fri Mar 26, 2010 9:41 pm
She closed her eyes, shivering as he ran his hand through her hair. Life was a little less bright without her brother around; Serenade didn't like all the same things she did, and Andeon was never as accommodating with piggyback rides. Also she always had to clean Andeon and Mackenzie's apartment. Well, Castor... but Castor was Castor. Elke folded her hands over her stomach and curled her toes in the covers.
The offer of cooking was met with surprise; her eyes flew open and she narrowed them at him, like she was looking for body snatchers or something. "If you want to," she said after a long moment, and then she closed her eyes again. Usually it was Elke who cooked, and Grayson who backseat mixed up the pizza sauce. If Grayson wanted to take a turn as the chef, she would not complain. And besides, arguing with her brother might make him stop petting her hair, and she didn't want that. Being in a hospital bed for a million days made you starved for human contact, and she had always been very affectionate with Grayson.
"You are just saying that." She reached up to wrap her fingers through his, continuing: "Can I come with you, when you go? I have to dye my roots again." The blue hair looked good against her skin, better than deep reddish brown. Better than black would, but--she reached up with her free hand, laid the backs of her fingers against Grayson's curls. No, black would look fine with her skin. Extreme, but some day she might want to do that. "I am to be released tomorrow, you know. I'll come straight home, okay?"
She rolled onto her side, still clinging to his hand. Into his palm, she whispered, "I missed you." It seemed like he had been gone for such a long time.
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Posted: Fri Mar 26, 2010 9:55 pm
He should have come sooner. He should have come much sooner, and though he knew that, he couldn't change that he hadn't. What he could do was be there for as long as he could, and make it up to her in little ways. Not all at once, and certainly not all in the hospital room, but he would make the effort to spend more time with Elke, and not just because he felt guilty. Elke was a part of his life, a very precious person to him; without her, he wasn't entirely who he wanted to be.
Some had raised their eyebrows at the close bond they shared, especially considering there was no blood between them, but they were siblings of the heart. It was just as strong as siblings of blood, he thought, and he'd never looked at Elke as anything but his cherished and loved sister. To Grayson, that was what she would always be. There was the matter of Leo, and the bits and pieces of the past that he could remember, but that had been Leo.
The past... was where that belonged. Soldier Leo had lived his life, and though there were thoughts and feelings that swirled in Grayson's memory, he knew well they weren't his own. He had his own thoughts and memories to deal with, and he didn't need his soul's previous incarnation's angst to deal with on top of his own.
He squeezed her hand, lightly, and insisted, "I'm not just saying that. You are my beautiful sister, and you'll always be that way." He smiled, though it faded around the edges, took on a heaviness that was all too familiar lately.
She whispered into his hand; he stroked his fingertips along her cheek. It was a fleeting, but reassuring, and he murmured, "I missed you, too. We'll go get out hair done together, and we'll go out for ice cream afterward."
Little things.
He had to remember that life was made of the little things, and he would be all right.
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Posted: Fri Mar 26, 2010 10:06 pm
She giggled as she drew her knees up against her chest, the insistence familiar. It was like an old friend, or a shirt worn in just to the point where it was perfectly comfortable but not quite worn out, the seams softened to nearly nothing. Her brother knew what to say, just like always--nothing had changed at all. Nothing that couldn't be fixed--and what needed fixing, she would fix, she would do it and smile.
"Butter pecan," she dictated to Grayson, as if she would ever choose anything different. After a long pause, mostly populated by Elke not letting his hand go and tracing Zodiac symbols on his knee with her free hand, she repeated: "Butter pecan for me. And you will have strawberry and we will eat it at the park because it will be a nice day out and--"
For no reason she could explain, she was crying, her shoulders shaking, and the hand on his knee balled up into a fist. Silently--but Grayson would know, he always did, and the tears falling into the fabric of his too-loose jeans would tell him so even if he didn't. "--And we will be happy," she finished, trying for a firm declaration but instead it became a question, begging for confirmation: We will be happy, won't we?
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Posted: Fri Mar 26, 2010 10:16 pm
He never knew what to do when someone was crying. It was ice to his heart, lead in his belly; the feeling that he should know, should be able to comfort, and not having any idea how to do it. The last person who'd cried on him was Jude, and he'd felt awkward and unsteady then, but he felt moreso now. More, because this was Elke, and she tried so hard not to cry, tried so hard to be the light when it faded everywhere else.
He swallowed, and gently, very gently, shifted her. Words failed him, but this was his sister, and the last thing he wanted was to see her cry. The world was too much for them lately, much too much for them both, but he'd been stupid and selfish, and hadn't seen how much it was dragging her down. She didn't want to let him, just as he didn't want to let her, and they were so alike that it hurt. He slipped his arms around her, wanting to hold her tight enough that she couldn't shake even if she wanted to, but didn't, because he didn't want to hurt her. He simply tucked her against his chest, pressed his cheek to the top of her head, and closed his eyes.
"We are going to be the happiest people," he said it softly, a hand stroking down her back. "Our faces will hurt from smiling."
He drew back just enough to kiss the crown of her head, fingertips continuing to glide up and down her back. "But for now, use up all your tears."
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Posted: Fri Mar 26, 2010 11:21 pm
"I'm being stupid," she said, pressing her forehead to his shoulder. Deep breath--that Grayson smell. Safety and love and happiness. Everything would be all right, she was just being dumb because she hurt everywhere and wanted to go home. Her smile, when it came, was watery and not very stable, but it was a smile. It was sincere.
He promised, and so it would be true. They would be happy--things would work out, and the Princess would regain her Crystal, and there'd never be a need for her friends and family to hurt again. It sounded too good to be true.
But it was a promise. Elke had never doubted her brother's promises.
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