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First post - Finn
Second post - Cavalier quest
Third post - Quest logic
Fourth post - Family

Name: Huckleberry Finn Derouen

• "Huckleberry Finn" was the name on his birth certificate. He has since had it legally changed.
  
• Derouen is spelled like the French, but has since been thoroughly Anglicized. Finn says it "DEH-roon" and discourages people from trying to pronounce it like the French. (He's not even quite sure what the French pronunciation is.)

Nicknames: He would like you to call him "Finn." Most of his peers persist in calling him "********> 19

Birthday: March 10th

Sign: Pisces

Blood Type: O+

Fav. Food: Fresh bread, grilled fish, organic trail mix.

Hated Food: Bananas of any description, tapioca, rice pudding

School: Sovereign Heights (Political Science and Environmental Science double major. He plans to be a park ranger once he graduates.)

Hobbies:

Debate club- Finn belongs to this club strictly so that he has an excuse to compose and deliver long rants about how humans are destroying the environment. (Composing these rants is when he does most of his research on his Cause Of The Week - so he does know what he's talking about when he goes off on them.) He is known to shirk off meetings on a whim and the team knows not to count on him at competition. Actually, they're not sure why he's even in this club, because he only shows up at meetings about twice a month and only goes to competition about once a year, and only as a last possible back-up. Finn does not take membership in this club seriously at all.

Outdoorsman- Finn is that guy who is always talking about that awesome camping trip he's planning for this weekend - do you want to go with? He's going to kayak six miles and then hike six more and then climb a two hundred foot rock face and then sleep under the stars on this glorious vista... and that's just Saturday! He's got a dusty red Jeep that he loves (that looks totally out of place in the Sovereign Heights parking lot) and has done a lot of work on/had a lot of work done on so that it runs "clean" and "eco-friendly" (it's unclear from how he talks about it whether he did it himself or someone else did it for him. He at least knows enough about the car to fix it when it breaks down). He recently got into Ultra light Backpacking, and is known to drive two or three hours out of town and disappear for a week at a time during school holidays. He is always trying to get one classmate or another to accompany him, but they're not guaranteed to say yes.

Dada Vigilante- While he was at Meadowview, Finn basically slid by without making an impact, and he HATED it. He wasn't a star student or a stellar athlete or an amazing artist - the only trace that he was ever even there is his recycling club and his senior superlative. Upon starting at Sovereign Heights, Finn decided things were going to change. Inspired by tales of the colleges he hoped to attend and one too many movies about adolescent mayhem, Finn decided he was going to become a roof-and-tunnel hacker, despite Sovereign Heights having no tunnels to speak of and the roofs being... less than accessible.
So he became a Dadaist. Using the campus green spaces, fences, and flagpoles, Finn creates fairly elaborate installations of what he calls "Dadaist expressionistic art," that appear, without fail, every few weeks - usually in the form of inflatable lawn ornaments (bought discount in the off-season), found objects and things scavenged from curbside pickup, Greenpeace banners, and re-colorations of the American flag. None of his work is permanent, and usually disappears within 24 hours of being set up - in terms of vandalism and trespassing, it's very minor counts of both and he does usually get written up for it, resulting in...

Campus clean-up- From the amount of time Finn has spent cleaning off desks, mowing sports fields, and shelving books, you would think he was on work study. When he hasn't departed for parts unknown, Finn is a regular fixture in the Sovereign Heights student janitorial squad, otherwise known as detention. If he's lucky and well behaved, he might make it a month without finding himself back behind a lawn mower. The weird part of all this is that Finn doesn't seem to mind detention: he does it with a smile and a laugh, takes his punishment like a man, and repeats the same offense that landed him there in the first place a few weeks later. He does usually try to talk himself out of it when it's assigned, but at this point that's mostly a ritual between him and the vice principal, and he has not actually gotten away with shirking it in ages.

Gemstone: Aquamarine

Virtues:

A Shoulder to Cry On: If you need someone to back you up in a fight, plan a surprise party for your little brother, or feed your fish while you go to Jamaica, don't ask Finn to do it, because he'll leave you hanging. But if you had a crappy break-up, he will gladly stay on the phone with you until two in the morning and agree with you that your ex is a douche (just don't expect him to ever confront your ex about it; he won't). If you're stressed out, Finn will tell you every thing will be okay and come up with some bullshit reasons why, and then when everything turns out okay he'll say, "See, what did I tell you?" and assure you that he always knew; if things aren't okay he will listen to you cry and assure you things will get better, you just need to give them time. He won't talk behind your back or sell you out (that would take the attention off of him, now wouldn't it?), and if you show up at his house with a cheesy movie and a pint of ice cream, he is totally game to watch it with you and make fun of all the cliches. He will always be there for you emotionally and after the fact, provided you don't need him to actually do anything.

Charismatic: Finn's got that je ne sais quois. Unfortunately, Finn knows this, and he tries to use it as a crutch whenever he can, explaining that his experiments in dadaist art and counterculturalism are just him "expressing his creativity" and "finding himself," trying to flirt with the office ladies and play up that "troubled but cute" stereotype that his sister has proclaimed he falls into (in one of their rare moments of civility). It works only slightly more often than it doesn't, but it does mean that Finn is good with people. He usually knows what to say to avoid disaster, and is good at talking his way out of trouble (when trouble wants to be talked out of, that is). He will never accept a punishment without trying to work his way out of it first.

Idealistic: Finn thinks he can save the whales, rid the world of injustice, and feed the poor so long as he gets a good night's sleep and a healthy breakfast. Once he sets his mind on something, he doesn't stop until he's good and ready to stop. He tends to get fanatical about causes, talk about nothing but for a few weeks, and then move on to something else, while still quietly carrying a torch for the previous obsession. It also means that he doesn't hesitate to get involved in things that interest him, and once involved he gives 110%... until he gets bored of it. (Unfortunately these things are usually not his school work.) (Saving the environment tends to be a constant underlying theme. He does not get bored of trying to save the world, just comes up with different ways to do it.)

The fall guy: The secret of Finn's public art, that Finn guards zealously and would like you to never, ever know, is that he has a couple of friends helping him set everything up. Every so often someone supposes that there must be accomplices because of how complex some of the instalations are - like the time he rearranged those benches in the middle of the night, or the pyramid of plastic lawn chairs, or-- The idea was Finn's, and when an idea of Finn's gets Finn into trouble, Finn takes all of the blame, even if there were other people involved. He "takes one for the team," so to speak. He's been doing this since elementary school when he realized that his classmates liked him better when he took sole responsibility for something a group of them did, and attention is attention, no matter if it is good or bad. Finn will not, however, take responsibility for something he had no part in - when he says "It wasn't me," it's because it really wasn't him. (He doesn't like detention quite enough for that.) His refusal to drag others down with him has earned Finn a grudging measure of respect from his acquaintances and a reputation as an honest contender.

Flaws:

Unreliable: Finn sets priorities at his own pace. Don't count on him for anything, ever, because the chances of it actually getting done in a timely fashion are about one in fifty unless it's got something to do with his fascination of the week or absolutely essential to the continued existence of the human race. As mentioned previously, Finn is perfectly competent and able to put effort into things, but the fact is that he usually doesn't, preferring to rely on half-assing it coupled with copious amounts of charm. He is prone to taking on responsibilities that he doesn't plan to make good on any time in the near future, procrastinating on projects until the last minute, or just plain not doing them. (WEAKNESS.)

Immature: Needless to say, Finn knows jackshit about how the real world works. For all the far away causes that he gets riled up about, the fact is that he's a rich white kid from the suburbs with a ridiculous name and a bad haircut. His understanding of good and evil was gleaned from environmental documentaries about rainforest destruction and dolphin slaughter, but he doesn't know how to stop it. He talks big, but his real actions are far smaller, then Finn feels helpless, so he talks even bigger... lather, rinse, repeat. Besides relatively small local efforts like recycling and eating locavore, he's largely all talk and no walk and a bit of a hypocrite.

Needy: Good or bad, Finn lives for attention. He needs to know that you saw what he did and you have an opinion, one way or the other, on whether it was <******** amazing or <********> He doesn't care what you thought, just that you thought it, whether it's about his ironic t-shirt or that SAVE THE WHALES banner he put up last week or the giant inflatable cow on the front lawn. Finn feels like he has to be receiving a moderate amount of attention at almost all times, and is determined to make a lasting impression on the world, be it by upping the ante on pranking at Sovereign Heights or winning a Nobel Prize someday. His only long-term goal is "SAVE THE WORLD" - Finn wants to be remembered. He is terrified of going quietly into the night, waking up one day all alone, having never amounted to anything and not remembered by anyone.

Self-serving: Finn is a loyal friend because of the attention it gets him. When you call Finn in the middle of the night to cry and ask for advice, to him it means that, of all the people in the world you could have called, right now he is the most important of all of them.
Similarly, Finn takes the singular blame for his wacky installations of public art partially because he doesn't want to see his friends get in trouble for something that was his fault, but mostly because he wants all of the credit, and hence all of the glory. If Finn is doing something nice for you, it is because he is also getting something out of it. It is rare for him to do something that doesn't have equal or greater stakes in it for him than it does for you - sure, he's unreliable, but he picks and choses the projects he bothers to finish pretty carefully, singling out the ones with the best cost/benefit ratio and elevating them to the front of the line.

Physical Description:

Hair: A shade between dirty blonde and brown, choppy and a bit past his chin, with uneven bangs and a prominent cowlick. It looks like it was done in about five minutes with a pair of kitchen scissors, which is exactly what he did. (It's a safe bet to say he was going for something like this but went horribly, horribly astray. Note that his hair is darker than Owen Wilson's.)

Eyes: A very “true blue” sort of blue, not particularly light or dark in shade. Naturally very “Deer-in-the-headlights” looking. Attempts to combat this with various worldly squints are utterly unsuccessful.

Face: Boyish but with the start of a square jaw line, a slightly crooked but otherwise very average (slightly large-ish) looking nose that he broke in seventh grade, and LOADS OF FRECKLES, mostly concentrated on the bridge of his nose and his cheeks but really following no rhyme or reason in how they distribute themselves around his face. Tan skin. Eyebrows like caterpillars.

Body: Sturdy and compact, about 5'7" or 5'8" with broad shoulders and chest, with no real sense of a waist - rather brick-like in silhouette, really. His shape is more of a structural issue than a weight one - he's actually rather lean when you get down to it, just dense.

Fashion: Outdoorsy and functional. He is very, very fond of his hiking boots and cargo pants, which he wears with t-shirts he thinks are ironic (which means they have ads for laundry detergent or political candidates from the 1980s on them.)

Finn's Name was a combination of his father's nostalgia for Mark Twain, and his mother's gung ho attitude. Anthony suggested it, but had Gwen not been so totally 100% on board with the idea, Finn would probably wound up named Joshua, or Jeremy, or David, or any other number of normal names suited to a Nice Jewish Boy. (Of course, he was the only "Huckleberry Finn" on the first day of kindergarden...)

Cavalier Aeneas!

Cavalier Aeneas of the canyon

Challenge: "Go take a hike!"

Weapon: Anemos, a long rapier [yadda yadda yadda, design up to Shaz].

When bonded to a Black Moon senshi, untreated wounds inflicted by Anemos will "erode" and grow larger over time instead of healing. Once the wound is properly cleaned and bandaged, the process stops and the wound heals normally.

• Anemos is the greek root for wind.

Eye color: Under the influence of Aeneas, Finn's eyes turn sunset orange.

Civilian Name: Petros Stamatis
First name is the greek form of "Peter," Surname means "Stop."

• Petros is derived from the greek for "stone." It shares this root with "Petra," the name of an ancient Jordanian city carved entirely out of the walls of a canyon.

Hobbies:

Chess: Among the parallels, Aeneas is notoriously horrible at chess. Since he learned to play, he has only ever won twice, and they were such glorious days that he has forever engraved the dates and times into his "lucky" bishop. However, for how bad he is, it has never, ever stopped him from trying. As a chess player. Aeneas plans three moves ahead and hinges his entire strategy on you doing this specific thing, right now. If you do it, then good for him, maybe he'll win this time. If you don't do it, well, that's nothing new. He did not see what you were doing with your bishop or that your knight was in range to attack that and where did that pawn come from? Oops.
He is a gracious loser and an honest opponent.

Hiking: Aeneas thinks the best way to understand a place is to see it from the ground up. In the Black Moon kingdom, his favorite thing to do upon visiting somewhere he's never been before is to find a local guide and explore. Of course this is sort of difficult in a domed city, but Aeneas isn't picky - although he prefers nature, he's perfectly fine with urban exploration as well. He has a good memory for locations and distances, and while his lack of foresight sometimes gets him into trouble, he is seldom lost.

Reading Travel Memoirs: When he's not going off on his own adventures, Aeneas likes to read about other people going places. He doesn't care for the stories unless they're true, and is a great fan of the travelogue genre. Back in the parallel moon kingdom, he maintains a small private library where he has collected the writings of many explorers, some ancient and some modern, and upon arriving on Earth will begin familiarizing himself with this dimension's travel literature as well. He makes no pretenses of being a scholar, and refrains from referencing his reading in general conversation, but it is something he greatly enjoys.

Journal Keeping: Aeneas likes reading travel memoirs, but he also aspires to write his own. When traveling, he tries to make a habit of jotting down the day's events in a commonplace book before he goes to sleep, with the intention of expanding them out and commenting on them later. The second part of this plan is usually not carried out, his excuse being that he hasn't found the write adventure yet. Surely Aeneas doesn't want to burst onto the literary scene with something boring! He will frequently lament that "This is all going in the memoirs," but at this point the other cavaliers are beginning to wonder if the memoirs will ever actually be written.

Virtues:

Stalwart: Aeneas is a team player, dedicated to his fellow cavaliers and to their prince and their queen. He is, for all intents and purposes, incorruptible, and once he is set on a path he will remain on that path until his commanding officer gives him another order - Aeneases in motion tend to stay in motion. He is more than happy to work paired with other cavaliers or senshi and does his best to be friendly to all of them, and although he is not so good at secret keeping, he's certainly not a gossip and won't talk bad behind his friends backs. If he's in trouble and you've narrowly avoided it, Aeneas won't rat you out, and he takes the blame where he feels it is his duty to take it. He is quick to come to a friend's aid, and fervently hopes that they would do the same when he needs them (he knows he will).

The Mediator: Aeneas is the grease in the machinery, the interpersonal relationship problem solver. As vice-captain of the black moon cavaliers, he performs the task of getting the varied and emotional individuals who make up their team to work together and play nice. He is charismatic, but instead of using this to help himself, he uses it to mediate between others who aren't quite so gifted in the art of knowing the right thing to say. He is possessing of a sharp wit and keen sense of humor, and he knows when to interject it to defuse a tense situation; he is very fond of puns and riddles and jokes he otherwise considers as dignified - physical humor is far below what he cares to delve into, or else he just can't be bothered to learn how to do a decent pratfall. He likes dirty jokes, but only the kind that you need a certain level of education and worldliness to understand, otherwise he finds them crude.

Goal Oriented: Aeneas doesn't sweat the small stuff. Minor stresses roll off him like water off a duck's back, and he would advise you to do the same. Because he doesn't pay heed to little everyday things, he is able to focus on the big picture much more effectively, plot a solid course of action, and get to the point. He does, of course, sometimes miss the little details because he is so focused on the grand scheme of things, but he doesn't worry about missing them - he writes his strategies in outlines instead of scripts, moving from bullet point to bullet point and letting everyone improvise to get from piece to piece. Trial and error has proven that this sort of loose, sketchy planning works best when you're dealing with a superior officer like Hector - keep your options open and your eyes on the prize.

Good Cop: Where Hector would like all of the Black Moon Cavaliers to run off into battle on the basis of, quote, "YOU HAVE TO DO THIS FOR YOUR SCREWED-UP VENGEFUL EMOTIONAL HEALTH," Aeneas would rather send them off understanding how damn important their jobs are, and that they should be doing this because they want to be here doing this important, world-saving work, and not because they're a bunch of ******** up individuals. He operates from a slightly calmer, more laid-back place than his Captain does, taking interest in fostering camaraderie that isn't just based on berserker rage and taking interest in morale from a standpoint that is a bit removed from the sibling rivalry of Hector and Alexandros. This is not to say that Aeneas operates on a basis closer to the white moon cavaliers - he's drinking the same kool-aid as everyone else on his team - he just doesn't think that just because their Captain runs into battle without a second thought means they have to as well.
This is made more effective once Hector finishes his THIS IS SPARTA shpiel - suddenly Aeneas's slightly more logical request for the same dedication seems a whole lot more reasonable.

Flaws:

Loudmouth: Aeneas has no inside voice, can't restrain himself from yelling insults and provocations at his opponent, and has a very hard time keeping secrets. Things told to him in confidence are safe, and he thinks gossip is bad for morale, but secrets about things are fair game. He will tell you that everyone else is already at your surprise party, come on, we'd better hurry up or we'll be late, and that the secret base is this way, past that clump of trees and under those rocks. It should come as no surprise that Aeneas is rarely trusted with important information. He is told things strictly on a need-to-know basis and even then he might blab to the whole world. He speaks in a loud, boisterous tone of voice that you can hear coming from a quarter mile away. If you tell him to whisper, he'll try his best but he'll be damned if he's not practically shouting again three minutes later.

Perfunctory: Aeneas's operates with very fluid strategies; details are not his forte, and he tends to screw up the little things on the way to getting the big things done. If you send him to the store to buy milk, he'll come back with milk, but it might be the wrong kind. He just doesn't see the point in worrying about the color of the roses as long as the garden gets planted, which door you use to get into the castle so long as you do get in, eventually, and certainly couldn't care about the difference between Skim, whole, and goat when it comes to having something to put on his cereal. Naturally, in situations where details are important - puzzles, chess, matching clothes - he comes up more than a bit short: Aeneas more than likely would have failed the bottle puzzle in the first Harry Potter book. He will go to the wrong castle, rescue the wrong princess, and slay the wrong giant, and be okay with it because the details aren't important - it was A castle, A princess, and A giant, and that's all that matters. (WEAKNESS)

Clingy: Aeneas is a good negotiator who does his best to keep the team together and running smoothly not only because it's his job, but because he needs to be a part of a team. Aeneas thrives on companionship and having someone to count on to pick up slack for his shortcomings, and he hates to be alone. He does occasionally get a bit overly-friendly, and when he finds a compatriot who is friendly and willing to tolerate him, he runs the risk of trying to spend every waking moment with them. (Just tell him to back off a bit, guys. He'll understand.)
Aeneas is afraid that the team isn't as cohesive as it ought to be, with too many free radical elements and a tendency to fall apart at any moment when things go disastrously wrong. He feels obligated to try to keep the group together, so he keeps his friends close - he doesn't want to wind up alone, stuck in a mess he doesn't know how to get out of.


Colors: Sienna and peru with coral accents - Seen here, here, and here.
Uniform ideas: Obviously up to Shaz, but I think a bit of a Cowboys-and-Indians vibe would be cool- Cowboy boots and spurs, a bolo tie, maybe some leather fringe? Canyons occur all over the world, but in the United States they're most common in the southwest. Utah has the largest concentration of slot canyons in the world, but Antelope Canyon, the most popular one for hikers and photographers to visit, is solidly in Navajo territory in Arizona. (Slot canyons are really cool looking. crying )

--> Hurr de durr, I noticed last night that Aeneas is parallel Nephrite, who is straight up Cavalier of the West. So a Wild Wild West vibe would be awesome/hilarious on so many levels. Also I love you guys for being so thoughtful that that discovery even exists to be made at all.
Why the canyon?
Canyons are massive geological features formed over a long period of time by the gradual force of erosion. Once they are set in their course, they endure - for all the time it takes to make them, they are certainly durable. Canyons, in both their scope and how long they take to take shape, represent a disregard for the small details and a focus on the bigger effect, something that Aeneas shares.

Furthermore, how difficult it is to alter a canyon - a river in a canyon is referred to as being "entrenched," meaning its course cannot be changed - is symbolic of how Aeneas "stays the course" with his loyalty - once he starts moving on a command, he keeps going until another command is given.

He's loud, and canyons amplify sound.

Finn, in his adventurousness, his enjoyment of hiking and rock climbing and natural preservation, is naturally suited to a sphere like the Canyon. He also tends to have a bit of a one track mind - in essence being difficult to alter in his course, but in execution tending to switch ideas often in favor of taking the path of least resistance. Canyons are formed by water taking the course of least resistance, the natural path, over hundreds of thousands or millions of years.

They are both charismatic, each in their own way - people are drawn to them. Natural wonders have long been the subject of human fascination - there are huge parts of the tourist industry devoted to them! And even before sunburnt yankies paid way to much to stand on the Sorth Rim, Canyons have long been regarded as holy sites by various groups - ancient Native Americans made pilgrimage to the Grand Canyon, and the ancient Jordanian city of Petra was carved into the walls of a slot canyon called the Siq. (For geological formations, they're awfully charismatic.)

Why Finn?
Finn's adventurous, impassioned personality makes him a good choice for a mission like recovering the Marcasite crystal. However, he has some serious shortcomings owing to his overall immaturity and has a lot of growing up to do - something that Aeneas's influence can help him with. Additionally, Finn is physically fit - certainly a plus in a mission that involves sword fighting against dastardly death phantom and negaverse operatives. He hasn't exactly got much experience fencing, but he did try it for about two weeks at summer camp once and he learns fast .

Additionally, Finn has proven that he does know how to prioritize, how to pull off a covert operation, and how to direct a group of people (see, the anonymous friends who help him pull off all his crazy dada stunts). He wants to save the world and feel important, so the work of the cavaliers will appeal to him. He's good with people, a trait he shares with Aeneas, and one essential to reigning in a headstrong bunch like the Black Moon Cavaliers.

In some respects, Aeneas can be seen as a more mature figure built on the same basic template as Finn, and it is true that I have built him with some similarities in mind, but most importantly, Finn can learn things from Aeneas. They share certain ideals and flaws, but Finn is presently selfish and spoiled, where Aeneas is far more appreciative of the people around him and far less of a flake. I would hope that, as a cavalier, Finn would finally shed the last shreds of childish immaturity and emerge from his prolonged adolescence as a better person.

On something of a side note, Aeneas and Finn share a fear of winding up alone - sharing a body does not count as not being alone.

Plus, Finn has his own car, and does not object to driving other people around in it - surely this counts for something!

Other miscellaneous justifications:

Interest in reading/writing travel memoirs - Aeneas (in the greek sense) is the hero of the Aeneid and a character in the Illiad, which are, although written from a third person perspective, basically travel memoirs. Granted Aeneas went somewhere far more interesting than you did on his summer vacation.

Relationships to other Parallels:

Alexandros: Aeneas views Alexandros as an authority figure once removed; his boss's boss, if you will. He willingly and loyally obeys orders given by Alexandros, but considers the Prince to be somewhat removed from him, by virtue of royalty and hierarchy. He is reluctant to speak around Alexandros unless first asked, for fear of undermining the prince's authority, and all in all presents as a bit awkward in his presence.

Nehelenia: If Aeneas sees Alexandros as his boss's boss, then Nehelenia is the CEO of the whole operation. He bows before her authority and would never dare go against an order from her. The queen can always count on Aeneas to defend her and carry out her orders as her loyal knight - beyond that, he is nothing but respectful towards her, and gives her the same deferential treatment as he does to her consort.

Hector: Aeneas's "boss," the captain of the parallel cavaliers - Aeneas is loyal right hand man and co-pilot to Hector. While the prince and the queen are afforded a large degree of respect, Aeneas's relationship to Hector is far more fraternal, with Aeneas not hesitating to input his opinion on plans or to object to an idea. He also relies on Hector as a communications line between the rest of the cavaliers, himself, and the high command, viewing him as both officer and confidante.

The personality you're gunning for is pretty OP. He skips school whenever he wants and suffers no consequences, not even failing courses, because his dad's a professor and he is just so charming? Dude, if he can charm his way into passing all his classes when he does practically nothing, and manages not to get detentions/academic probation after repeat offenses of trespassing (assuming the roof is off-limits)... Well, that's just insane. I would find this personality more palatable if he did suffer consequences for the things he does beyond having to charm his way out of stuff.

I'd look out--all your flaws are pretty "cool" flaws, which is just not good. He wants to be better than you (arrogant), he's pissy (broody as a hollywood starlet, as you say), and he only does things if he wants to and gets away with it. This is the kind of personality that leads to people not wanting to play with you because all of Finn's suffering is inflicted by himself, and there's nothing there they can do with you.

This definitely does have the seeds of a good character. I think I see what you're trying for, and Finn has the potential to get there. What I might do is try and tone it down a little--charisma can only get you so far, man. Define what Finn does that makes his charisma different from, say, Brad Pitt's charisma. I'd also do this with Loyalty--you've pretty much described a textbook case, but what makes Finn's loyalty stand out from, say, Elke's loyalty or Damon's? Go through all your traits and ask "How can I make this really say something about Finn? I think that would help you out a lot. smile

Good luck!

I'd love to be able to say Finn would get expelled in spite of his father's position; but alas, past experience says YOU ARE CORRECT. In grade school one of my most obnoxious bullies had a mother on the staff. Sadly such positions are able to be abused, although I can tell you he's almost bound to get no small amount of resentment from other students who see this in action.

I think in warning he has a fair potential to be really annoying because of his Hollywood complex, and especially because he seems to be out to be as cool as possible.

Has he ever been caught doing his exploration -off- campus? And has he ever gotten in trouble his father can't solve? Since he apparently steals things like Christmas blow up lawn ornaments and stuff. It's hard to believe his fathers capable of getting him out of everything with just some detentions, and he'd probably run the risk of ending up with an record.

Also: How much research does he actually do in his wild 'save the planet' quests? Does he do full research or does he just jump on the nearest "Green" bandwagon regardless of accuracy?

Ditched surly for needy - it seems to fit the direction the character is taking better and surly was giving me a lot of trouble. I also added some more information to the cavalier quest and would love, love, love some feedback!

Hi there! Coda here.

Overall, I am not really getting the impression that anything gets to Huck here, which is my main issue. I get the idea that his main schtick is that he's a charming, spoiled, self-absorbed boy who's used to getting away with murder and thus keeps on getting away with murder over and over. So I think you need to give him a few weaknesses in accordance with that. If he's been so sheltered and indulged by his parents, then he really shouldn't be able to take the heat at all -- he's never had to take any heat. Where are flaws like "naive," "self-absorbed," "inconsiderate?" In addition, what really gets to him? What upsets him? Even if he doesn't show it, what is the seamy underbelly to his personality?

I do really like his rapier effect and it makes sense why the Parallels would recruit him for a Cavalier -- however, you should probably bear in mind that Aeneas is the vice-captain, working right under Hector, and that Alexandros would bear this in mind when selecting an Aeneas. It's not just fighting that's important, it's the ability to follow orders and work with a team.

As an aside, I really hate to say this but I cannot imagine an English professor that would name their child Huckleberry Finn: a kooky flower child, yes. An English professor, no. Particularly a professor of American lit, for whom Mark Twain is like, what Nightwish is to symphonic metal (aka "baby's first"). I'm not saying you should nix your character's name! Just that if you want to keep it exactly like that you should probably give him a tackier parent for the tacky name.

Usually, I pick through the thread and highlight things that might not be working. At the end, I do a little overview, but just a head's up -- this is a little improvement-focused and less pointing out the things that are already working. (You've had critique on him already so I figure you can see what is working based on the multiple comments.)

Huckles

Finn is in college, even if a prep college. Would he really have detention? I assume there is a system of punishment, but I would not guess detention to be part of that. At my college, breaking rules results in having the cops called on you. If caught vandalizing, you get a written arrest, or even taken in depending on the crime. Do too much, and you get expelled. If he lived in a dorm, there might be more punishments related to the ones you described, but I kind of bwah'd over college having detention.

Your first virtue can probably be broken up into two virtues and one flaw. It seems like you are describing "loyal" and "supportive" in addition to "self-serving"/"praise-seeking" too. If you rewrite that to say that Finn's loyalty is based on his eagerness to support you when you are down, that would be clearer. It seems like you tailored this to when his friends are upset, and if that is the case, you might want to comment on why he suddenly wants to help once someone is down in the dumps.

Also, at the beginning of the "unreliable" trait, you say, "Don't count on him for anything..." This seems to oppose the "loyal" trait a little, since you start it, "Finn will always be there for you... emotionally and after the fact." These two descriptions seem to be at odds so I would rewrite both to clear that up.

My main concern is that Finn's punishment for his pranking is not realistic enough. Even with a dad at the college, what about the stuff that he steals for these pranks? At some point, the police would get involved, especially if he was ever caught in the act or someone called to report a crazy person on the roof, and then his father would be unable to help him. If he is in college, he'd be dealing with the police, not detention. You might want to push him back to high school and maybe slap him in Hillworth. His acting out would be much more tolerated there, especially if he has a habit of fessing up to get more attention. <******** is hilarious.

Aeneas

Hector and your Aeneas would be a brash Captain pairing. Hector has that punch first, think later strategy, and your Aeneas "misses details and makes mistakes almost constantly." They sound like a reckless duo, and I'm not sure that the Aeneas you are describing would be a great complement to the existing character. He is good at mediating, sure, but Hector is also a TEAM SPIRIT kind of guy.

I'm not saying they have to be CORRESPONDING SHAPES LIKE PUZZLE PIECES FROM THE CLAY. But I'd like to see one trait where I think, "Oh, I bet that is why he makes for a good vice captain beside Hector." Rosemilk describes the way the Cavaliers are led and says, "Hector runs the Reflection cavaliers as a large unruly mob, not as a band of well-oiled soldiers. They're meant to be fearless, shouty Vikings, not a surgical unit." So I do think it is A-OK for Aeneas to also have some more reckless tendencies, but there is room for a little more method to the madness. Even the Vikings had a battle plan and someone making them train. Having a Cavalier who can't keep secrets and is a constant failbot with mistakes alongside a brash, punch-happy Captain might make for a really disorganized group. (Granted, they have the Prince too.) But! I guess what I'm saying is you might want to rethink what the Hector/Alexandros/Aeneas leadership council could use and try to fill that niche. Hector is a good leader because he is dedicated, courageous, passionate, and good at instilling camaraderie. What does Aeneas bring to the team?

But I'm rambling.

You have space to add another flaw, and I would take that opportunity to define a really strong weakness for Aeneas. Is he insecure about his position on the team? Is he constantly trying to mediate and entertain everyone because he is super afraid of being ostracized? You touch on this in the "clingy" description, but I think you could take that further and develop it more.

Le conclusion

It's a great start. You have laid the foundation. My biggest suggestion would be to go look over Hector and Alexandros again to try and theorize where Aeneas would fit into that picture and if there is anything you could change to make him more distinct and more fitted.

Changed the sword name and added a bit of specification to the uniform ideas section - I'm still in search of critiques on the current version of the profile, even if it's just to tell me that it's finally looking like a solidly rounded character instead of an overpowered pretty boy. smile