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 Posted: Sat Jan 23, 2010 12:43 pm
because I don't accept Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior.
I think he even cried- for my soul. I almost cried for him, because it would suck to think that way.
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I'm sure lots of you have gone through situations similar to that, and I was just wondering how you handled it, and exactly how it went down.
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Posted: Sat Jan 23, 2010 1:41 pm
LoL, he lies.
Well, only a few people know I am pagan, so I haven't seen that yet. But I am the grandson of a pastor so I am sure I will see it eventually.
Just be strong in your faith. What you believe you believe. No one can tell you otherwise.
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Posted: Sat Jan 23, 2010 2:38 pm
I'm not sure because my boyfriend is atheist and I respect his views, but anytime there is talk of any religion, including my own, he'll get into this big yelling fuss. "That's stupid, I'm right, stfu." kind of deal so I tend to avoid the subject. Even when the radio mentioned the people in Haiti praying just to get through the Earthquake, he made a huge fuss over how stupid they were. I wish he would be a little more respectful. Anyway, sorry for that ramble.
My friends who do know seem okay with it, even the christian ones, but it doesn't come up often.
I suppose you could try talking to him. Perhaps he has heard the wrong information about Paganism and needs to have things cleared up? I'm sorry I'm not much help, that's just my ideas. =/ Good luck!
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Posted: Sat Jan 23, 2010 4:40 pm
Zabazor- exactly, what you believe, you believe. He happens to believe in the bible, 100%.
Sams cool with my religion and all, hes actually interested in it too. Always asking me questions about it and stuff, it's nice. And even "what does a spell entail? Can I watch you do one or is that not allowed?" He just wants my soul to be safe, and believes that Jesus is the only one who can save me after I die.
So yeah, he doesn't have wrong information, just what I have told him. He asked me about all of his preconceptions.
About the athiest bf, that really sucks. I'm not sure which is worse, because my bf is visibly hurt by his own beliefs in my case. I do have some athiest friends, one thinks religion is pathetic, but I don't talk about it with her, the subject just doesn't come up. I have talked about it with her hippy mom with all three of us in the car- that was interesting.
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Posted: Sat Jan 23, 2010 5:36 pm
I kinda know what it's like to be in ur situation. My dad is like this really strong-willed, out spoken christain. He's always saying "You're worshipping the devil" and what not. It bugs me that he can't accept the whole of who I am. He always says he loves me but I haven't believed it since I was 12 cause if you love someone doesn't that mean you support their decisions?
anyways, I also have friend who know about me being wiccan and they all except me, in fact one wants to research it and he wants to see me cast a spell lol. I actually have 2 friends that are wiccan as well, though one is kinda odd because she says she's wiccan but then I started talking about it and she says that I'm religious and she doesn't like that. It's weird. But then again so are most of the people I hang out with so...
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Posted: Sat Jan 23, 2010 5:46 pm
@Haruhi... Can I personally slap your BF? I'm sorry, but Haiti is a tender subject for me as a friend of mine is Haitian and seeing her in pain and worrying every day about her family is putting my on edge about that whole subject and I'm will to hurt anyone, despite the Rede, who purposefully make light of the situation down there.
Anyways... I just kind of laugh at people who do this to me now because I used to do it myself before I left the Christian faith. I myself cried for my ex's soul because he was pagan, but now I see how stupid I was for doing that. I now understand that there is no one right religion, but everyone has a religion that is right for them and that's the best way of putting it to people who are willing to listen.
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Posted: Sat Jan 23, 2010 7:53 pm
captains bootie because I don't accept Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior.
I think he even cried- for my soul. I almost cried for him, because it would suck to think that way.
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I'm sure lots of you have gone through situations similar to that, and I was just wondering how you handled it, and exactly how it went down. Break up with him, a true lover excepts you for who you are and doesn't try to change you and accepts you the way you are. Hes not, break up. Besides as far as hes concerned you won't be in the same place when you die anyways. Cei Le Vie~
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Posted: Sat Jan 23, 2010 8:23 pm
So far most people I've told are accepting about it, but this one friend of mine did tell me she thinks I'm going to hell. She was nice about it, but still...I get really upset when people tell me that so I kind of questioned why her religion is so much better than mine because they have a god that condemns people to an eternity of torture just for not accepting him as their savior.
Childish, I know. One of the things I've said that I'm not proud of.
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Posted: Sat Jan 23, 2010 9:37 pm
@Aiedaile: Go right ahead. It had me pretty pissed off too.
@Sin: Breaking up isn't always the answer. I've been with my bf for 5 years and breaking up with him would be the worst thing in the world for me. Couples always have disagreements, it just happens. One should always try to work it out first. Breaking up over the first problem that comes up is senseless and will make it damn near impossible to find someone.
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Posted: Sat Jan 23, 2010 9:59 pm
I agree with Haruhi when it comes to breaking up over one problem. Couples should try working out their differences instead of bashing eachother.
@ boo: If he isn't too stubborn, try talking to him. The best thing to do would be to ease his mind. Show him that in Pagan traditions, our souls aren't born with flaws or sins, and that we're not eternally doomed unless we get saved. Humans only make mistakes, but we pay for those mistakes eventually, and we learn from them. It's like cutting out the middle man, if you know what I mean. You don't have to tell him this exactly, it's just what I think someone should know if they were worried for my soul. If he's really understanding, you might find a way to work this out.
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Posted: Sat Jan 23, 2010 11:33 pm
Sin- theres no way that I'd break up with Sam because he is a firm believer in his religion. Especially when I was worried for a while that he would be one of those Christians that can't accept people of other religions, and would break up with me for that reason.
He is not telling me to convert, and he does accept that I'm Pagan, hes interested in it. We have a lot of disagreements, and it's only been a week, but we already know how to get over it. He's just scared for my soul.
Alex- He believes in the bible 100%, so he does believe that people are born evil, and are doomed. He believes that anyone who is not a true Christian will go to Hell, and he doesn't honestly care what my religon is, he just doesn't want me to go to Hell, which is the only reason he cares.
You can tell if they actually care for your soul, or if they just believe they're right and you're wrong. He just cares. It makes me care for him even more.
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Posted: Sun Jan 24, 2010 12:05 am
Hmm.. this really is a tough situation to be in. Unfortunately I don't know very much about the bible or how you can talk about this with him. It seems like the only way he won't worry about your soul is if you convert to Christianity, but it shouldn't be the only way... there has got to be something else that will change his worries for your soul without you having to convert, and maybe this is what you need to find out from him.
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Posted: Sun Jan 24, 2010 9:14 am
It is something that you will need to work out now, rather than later though. Even though he seems accepting of your religious choices, the fact that he still thinks you are going to hell is very telling. It's saying loud and clear that he really thinks that his path is the only way to "salvation", and while this may not be so much of an issue now, if you stay together and eventually get married, it will be an issue later - especially if you have children.
While is may seem sweet that he cares so much about your soul, eventually you will get tired of him constantly nagging you over it. You will get tired of explaining how the concepts of his religion don't really have any meaning in yours, because the fact is, if he was really accepting of your religion, then it wouldn't be an issue at all.
If you decide to get married/have kids it will be worse, because then you will have to choose - do we raise the kids Christian, or Neo-Pagan, or both. If you want to raise them Neo-Pagan, as a father he will have serious issues if he thinks that his kids are going to hell, and (even if he doesn't do it consciously) will push them to choose his way over yours, etc...
Having been married to someone who was dead set against witchcraft and my practice of it for a good many years, I can tell you it is better to sort it out now rather than later. The longer you wait the worse it is.
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Posted: Sun Jan 24, 2010 9:19 am
x Haruhi in Wonderland x @Aiedaile: Go right ahead. It had me pretty pissed off too.
@Sin: Breaking up isn't always the answer. I've been with my bf for 5 years and breaking up with him would be the worst thing in the world for me. Couples always have disagreements, it just happens. One should always try to work it out first. Breaking up over the first problem that comes up is senseless and will make it damn near impossible to find someone. Well if the problem continues you should concider it, because sure mixed religious marrages work, but not easily. Thats long term of course unless your already planning on doing so. You might end up with two endings, if you want one for both religions. But like I said thats in the long term future, similar to what too2sweet said.
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Posted: Sun Jan 24, 2010 11:41 am
While my boyfriend won't admit to being christian he also won't deny it. I imagine he simply wishes to carry on with the beliefs of his family (christianity). That's fair enough.
He accepts my path because it means so much to me. I've been a pagan longer that I've known him.
We've talked about marriage and kids and made agreements. Marriage in a registry office, no priests/vicars. The kids would be raised with non-specific moral values. I might tell them pagan stories but that's about it. We both want the children to find their own way.
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