Is Dating a Non-Beleiver OK?

[LadyAmbrosia]

K, so, from what I understand the reason we are not supposed to marry non-beleivers is because the will corrupt your children. So, what if you decide not to have children, could you marry one then. I ask this because the only person I have ever really had a connection with is not Christian, he beleives that we are an alien experiment rolleyes , anyway, I never had a shot before, but now he's broken up with his girlfriend of 3 years, so I'm considering asking him out, but I'm not going to if it could never get that far. I don't want to waste my time, but I have alway's thought he could be the one.  

[rftkfan]

This is not a popular view but I say what I think and do not worry or say I am sorry. If you want to go out with him then do so. Do not let others tell you who to date or who not to. You will mess alot of things if you do.  

[Mystic_moon15]

i see no reason really why not. to me i think it would be easier to convert someone that way too. not saying you should date someone to convert just saying that in time maby he will convert. but i say go ahead and give it a shot. 3nodding  

[ioioouiouiouio]

I believe that the passage in the bible ("do not be yoked together with unbelievers" 2 Corinthians 6:14) is more of a precaution. I believe that, as long as your relationship does not detract from your faith, then it is acceptable to date a non-believer.  

[rftkfan]

Cometh The Inquisitor

I believe that the passage in the bible ("do not be yoked together with unbelievers" 2 Corinthians 6:14) is more of a precaution. I believe that, as long as your relationship does not detract from your faith, then it is acceptable to date a non-believer.

You think too much. You can be so heavenly minded that you are no earthly good. I work with more unbelivers then any thing. I do not mess anything I love living and will continue to do so.  

[Glorified Soul]

rftkfan

Cometh The Inquisitor

I believe that the passage in the bible ("do not be yoked together with unbelievers" 2 Corinthians 6:14) is more of a precaution. I believe that, as long as your relationship does not detract from your faith, then it is acceptable to date a non-believer.

You think too much. You can be so heavenly minded that you are no earthly good. I work with more unbelivers then any thing. I do not mess anything I love living and will continue to do so.

Um, what exactly are you saying...?

***

And I must agree with Cometh. If the nonbeiliever is not getting in the way of your walk with Christ, then alright. Though, it's kind of fruitless. I believe that true love cannot be achieved without Christ being in the relationship. Love requires a spiritual bond made only by Jesus. Without that bond, love cannot be attained.

1 John 4:16 (New International Version)
God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him.  

[ioioouiouiouio]

rftkfan

You can be so heavenly minded that you are no earthly good.

Oh, believe you me, I'm am far from being that 'heavenly minded'.  

[skittay]

I think that you should do what you believe, I know its not a response that most church leaders would give out, but I mean we are young and if we help them turn to God then thats cool. But if you are getting serious, then you should re-examine the situation and put your beliefs in there. and pray about it.  

[vampy dave]

I'm currently dating a non-believer. He comes to church usually 3 times a week with me. It's taking FOREVER but I think we are getting to him. He's alot more open now than he was a year ago, and he's learned alot. If you do end up dating him, don't force him to do anything. That's the quickest way to make them run away. Encourage him. Good luck smile  

[Bagpipejihad]

I have no idea wether it is right or wrong. But funny story. I new this guy one time- he was a christian and he was dateing this girl that worshiped satin. Whats up with that. But acording to what I think I just dont know.  

[Ginzeng]

That's not a good idea. The Bible passage 'do not be yoked with unbelievers' is there for good reason. Not only would such a relationship corrupt any children in it (even if that's not your concern right now), it would also detract from YOUR spiritual life. Contrary to popular belief, it is more often than not NOT the Christian who influences the non-Christian in the relationship, but the other way round. That's just not healthy, and I have many examples of Christian friends who dated non-believers and ended up so hurt and broken because they thought they were making progress and then ended up farther away from God.
A relationship in itself is a huge commitment of time and energy, and if you then still have to concentrate on trying to witness to this person while being respected for what you believe...you get my point.
It's a much better idea to befriend this guy first, and try to witness to him on that level. Once he's a Christian you're good to go, but please don't rush into it because you think he's 'the one'. Wait for what God has to say.
And most of all, pray about this!  

[LadyAmbrosia]

Ginzeng

That's not a good idea. The Bible passage 'do not be yoked with unbelievers' is there for good reason. Not only would such a relationship corrupt any children in it (even if that's not your concern right now), it would also detract from YOUR spiritual life. Contrary to popular belief, it is more often than not NOT the Christian who influences the non-Christian in the relationship, but the other way round. That's just not healthy, and I have many examples of Christian friends who dated non-believers and ended up so hurt and broken because they thought they were making progress and then ended up farther away from God.
A relationship in itself is a huge commitment of time and energy, and if you then still have to concentrate on trying to witness to this person while being respected for what you believe...you get my point.
It's a much better idea to befriend this guy first, and try to witness to him on that level. Once he's a Christian you're good to go, but please don't rush into it because you think he's 'the one'. Wait for what God has to say.
And most of all, pray about this!

I don't just think he's the one, I know. We agree about everything else important, I know that this is the most important thing, but I can't help how I feel.

And I don't think that he would ever try to lead me away from Christ, he understands how much God means to me and he would never take that from me. I don't want to convert him either, if he becomes a Christian, it should be because he loves God, not me.

Oh, and we already are friends, we're just not that close anymore because we haven't talked alot since graduation. But I will still take everything you've seid into consideration.

Thanks everyone who seid they think it would be ok to go out with him. I was worried that everyone would shoot me down by saying I was terrible for even thinking of going out with a non beleiver.

I'll probably wait a bit more before asking him out though, I don't want to be just a rebound....

Thanks again, anymore advice or opinions would be appriciated.  

[flyingemu27]

LadyAmbrosia

I don't just think he's the one, I know. We agree about everything else important, I know that this is the most important thing, but I can't help how I feel.

You may not be able to help how you feel, nobody really can. But you can help what you do with those feelings. You don't have to act upon your feelings. Just letting you know.

Here's my main concern. You say that you'll work on him and try to convert him.....but once you're in a relationship like that, it's very very hard to accomplish. Cause when you're dating, you'll be afraid that if you push it too hard, he'll break up with you. Then you'll hold back more. And once he says that he doesn't want to talk about it, you'll feel that if you do, it would be another step towards breaking up. My point is, once you get into that kind of relationship, it is 10 times, if not 50 times harder to convert somone.

And right now you may think that he won't damage your faith and you don't plan to let that happen, but chances are it will. He may not purposefully damage it, but his habits might rub off on you, or his statements about christianity might subconscieously affect your faith. Trust me, chances are it will happen. I'm dating a good girlfriend, but she's not a christian and sometimes it hurts my faith.

What I say is that you should get to know him more as a friend, then show him how great God's love and promises are. The earlier you start, the easier it will be. You don't have to get all the way there, but please just try to talk to him about it and get as far as you can before you ask him out.

You might say that if you start talking to him about God now, he won't like you as much and won't say "yes" when you ask him out. You might say that then, you wouldn't get the chance you would have had if you got to know him better later after asking him out. Well, if that happens than I say that, in my opinion, you shouldn't date him anyway. If you get close to him as a friend and he won't listen to you, what makes you think that you'll change him after it's even harder to talk to him about it?

Please consider my words (if you haven't asked him out already gonk ) and I hope this really helps you out. biggrin  

[LadyAmbrosia]

flyingemu27: No, I haven't asked him yet, I want him to be over his ex when I ask him, there is no way I will just be a rebound fling, I like him too much for that!

And I do completly see what you mean; being around a non-beleiver alot would certainly affect ones faith, I just can't see that happening in this situation. We've had discussions about God before and he just doesn't beleive in religion, but he certainly beleives that something created us... he just likes to think that it was aliens, that's all.

Ya, everyone keeps saying that we should be closer friends first, but while I'm out being his friend, he's out at clubs meeting girls who won't waste any time being friends He looks exactly like Jonny Depp, you see, so he can have his pick of girls...

But that is off subject, ya, mabey I should just try to be friends a little longer... I just hate knowing he's out at clubs with girls who will give him things that he knows I won't... he's really not good for my peice of mind.

Thanks again! Anymore opinions would be appriciated.  

[Alessandra]

crying It's so sad but yeh it makes it so difficult to be with them. There is a lack of spirtual connection even with ceratin morals and values they lack too. I am now with a Christian man now and it makes it so much better cause you can connect like the image of a triangle God at the top you and your guy at the bottom you grow together towards God in your relationship. For kids espically.. that would make it to confusing for them to have mixed belief systems for them to follow.