Pineapple Hero Christmas Special!!

[queennanami]

Pineapple Hero adventures

It was snowing heavily as Miss Yennon Scrooge made her way to the office that day. It was Christmas Eve, and it seemed everyone in the town of Charris Meadows was out and about that day. The gleeful laughter. The sound of carols. Children playing with snow balls, "All this cheer makes me sick to my a**! stare " Miss Yennon sneered as she approached her building.
"Excuse me, Miss Yennon?"
Yennon Scrooge slowly looked over her shoulder, "... Yes?" she said, staring down three men.
"Pleasure to meet you. We're the portly gentlemen. My name is Brian. This is Bo, and this is Cri-"
"I know of you, get on with it." Yennon cut them off rudely.
"Ahem... well Miss, we're here today to ask you to make a donation to the poor..?"
Yennon flipped her hair, "A donation? How about I give them a token of wisdom. Tell the poor I said GET A JOB!! scream "
"Wha?! MISS!! eek "
Yennon slammed the door behind her, "It seems all the idiots are crawling out and about today." Yennon said with a scowl, "Pineapple Cratchit!! scream Are you done filing those documents?!"
"Miss Yennon Scrooge... sweatdrop " Pineapple Cratchit said nervously, "I didn't think you wanted that done so soon!"
"FOOL. Whenever I tell you to do something, I always want it done immediately stare Get to work before I fire your dumb a**!" Yennon Scrooge has just sat in her chair when the door flew open, "What now!?"
"Merry Christmas my dear uncle!! blaugh "
"I told you, I'm your Aunt!!! scream What do you want!?"
"Why Uncle eek You know every year I have a party! You need to come visit and meet my wife! Why... we've been married for over a year, and you still haven't visited."
"I have better things to do than speak with frivolous people, Tragic rolleyes Every year I decline your invitation. Why would I accept now?"
"Why, I have faith you my dear, dear, Uncy-Yen-Yen!! 4laugh "
"I'M YOUR FREAKING AUNT!! scream " Miss Yennon stood angrily, "Have you said all you've come here to say?!"
"I suppose I have emo " Tragic took a few steps and stopped, "Pineapple Cratchit... how is your family? In good health..?"
"Oh, we get along. Tiny Pineapple still-"
"Pineapple!!! I don't pay you to socialize!" Yennon shouted from her desk.
"I'll uh... talk to you some other time, Tragic smile "
"Indeed. If time allows."

***

As Yennon Scrooge approached her door that night and fiddled with her keys, something strange caught her eye. Her old partner Utena Marley's face in place of where her knocker was. After blinking a couple of times the knocker quickly turned back to normal.
"Ugh... stare I've gotta quit drinking..." Yennon opened the door and quickly locked it behind her. Yennon hadn't payed her electricity in awhile so she creeped around the dark house. Electricity was expensive for a big house like this and Yennon was a cheap a**. All she felt she needed was a warm fire, a bowl of hot Farma and the latest star magazine. After changing into her night gown Yennon sat down by the fire and read her star magazine. She had this eerie feeling someone was watching her.
Just then as Yennon started to drift in and out of sleep she heard the weird sound like chains rattling. Yennon peaked over the back of her chair.
"ScrooooooOOOooOOoOOOoOOoge!" A long winded creepy voice bellowed behind her. Yennon slowly turned around.
"AH! scream " Yennon jumped up at the sight of her old partner Utena Marley standing there.
"Hey Scrooge! When you cup your hands like this it makes me sound scarier! blaugh " Utena cupped her hands over her mouth. "Seven Dayyys! Haha! See? biggrin Kinda a more echoy effect." Utena stood there in front of the fire. Nothing more then a shadowy figure.
"I dont have the blood you crave! scream " Yennon threw her star magazine at Utena. Which didnt do anything but hit the wall.
"Uh Scrooge, take it easy... talk2hand " Utena said inching closer towards Yennon Scrooge. Yennon grabbed her hot bowl of Farma and tried to throw it on Utena Marley.
"Now your just making a mess! scream " Utena Screamed at Yennon.
"You know I fired my maid too... Now who's going to clean this crap up? stressed " Yennon sat quietly for a moment. "If you have come back for your share of my profits, you will be quite disappointed. I will not pay you a single gold. I mean if you take me to court who's going to represent a ghost?" Yennon glared.
"Scrooge, I'm dead. What the hell do I need money for? stare I just came by to warn you and show you what your future looks like."
"Rich and married to Antonio Banderez?! biggrin Oh yeah cool I see it too."
"No you idiot!" Utena grabbed her chains she was lugging around. "I wanted to show you this!"
"Sorry. I'm not interested in buying your ghostly bling. talk2hand "
"I dont want you to buy them! I want you to see what your after life will be full of! It is my great dismay to walk amongst the living. To see and experience things I could have done with my life. I wear these chains to..." Utena was interrupted by the loud snoring of Yennon, "Hey get up! scream " Utena screamed at Yennon.
"Wha huh?! eek What happened? neutral "
"I was just trying to show you the weight of your actions. stare " Utena said, shaking the chains angrily.
"Ugh... Who needs to watch their actions when they have money..." Yennon said as she suppressed a yawn.
"If I could slap you I would! Now listen to my words! My time is nearly up! I am bound by the chains I linked in my life. They are really heavy... gonk I have such pains in my lower back and the after life Doctor never graduated med school emo It's horrible being dead! gonk " Utena looked to Yennon who had no remorse.
"Okay, all I'm hearing is, 'Blah Blah Blah my problems my a**'. Now how does this effect my life? rolleyes " Yennon asked.
"Gosh, were you this bitchy when we were partners? neutral "
"More. As I recall, you hogged half the gold while alive." Yennon answered quickly.
"... stare Not that it matters much to you, but I am trying to give you a chance to redeem yourself. So you dont end up like me. Last thing I need to deal with in the after life is your slow a** bitching at me."
"Redeem myself? neutral " Yennon was finally listening.
"Yes! scream you will be visited by THREE ghosts. Kinda like me only not as good looking wink " Utena flipped her hair.
"What?! Three ghosts? Do you count as one? gonk " Yennon asked.
"No I dont count. They will all show up at different times, so be ready. Now I must leave." Utena picked up her chain "Son of a b***h these bastards are heavy gonk "
Yennon watched as her dead partner dragged her chains through the wall and disappeared from sight. She watched the wall for a while, wondering if the b***h had more to say, but finally decided she'd waited long enough, and went into her bedroom, and lay down to sleep.

 

[queennanami]

Quote:

***

"Scrooge." a sweet voice echoed, "Scrooooooge." it came closer. Yennon stirred slightly, but snuggled her pillow and fell fast asleep again, "Scrooge..? Scroooooge!!! OOPS!! gonk "
Something smacked Yennon in the face, "AHHH!!" Yennon suddenly pulled out a giant gun, "ROBBERS!!! scream "
"No, no!! Calm down!" a strange glowing duck lady holding a giant staff waved her hands, "I tripped and hit you in the head sweatdrop "
Yennon blinked at her a moment, "... EAT LEAD INTRUDER!!! scream " but before Yennon could pull the trigger, the gun was yanked from her hands by an unseen force, and hurled out her window.
"Please calm yourself. I am Koro, the Ghost of Christmas Past. Please... come with me! And I will show you a time when you once loved Christmas."
"Shows what you know stare I never loved Christmas."
"Take my sleeve, Scrooge..! Take my sleeve, and we shall fly away!! Into a land of the past!!" Koro's voice took on a sing-song like essence, as she waved her arms in an exaggerated way.
"... Lets not and say we did." Yennon mumbled as she curled up in her covers.
Koro looked around, sighed, then lifted Yennon from her bed and hurled her out the window! Yennon screamed, flailing her arms and legs as the brisk wind whipped through her hair. Koro suddenly caught her and flew off through the town, "Do you recognize this place, Miss Yennon?" Koro smiled fondly.
"YOU CRAZY b***h!!! scream I should sue your a- eek is this my old school??"
"As a matter of fact it is. You lived here from a young age almost into your adulthood, correct?"
"Yes! I loved it here. Ooo! Over here is where I held hands with a boy for the first time. And over here is where I had a birthday party. Aww..! And here. This is where I tripped a fat girl and stole her lunch money. Ahh. Good times whee "
"Uh eek A-anyway. Do you know the way to your old class?" Koro smiled.
"I could walk there in my sleep!" Yennon skipped away happily.
They came upon a large empty classroom. All the children had gone home for the holidays. All, except Yennon. She was dressed in her cute school uniform, with red barrettes, reading a text book. Suddenly she reached into her pocket and pulled out a ciggarette and a lighter, and lit up.
Koro looked to the older Yennon standing beside her a lifted an eyebrow, "... What?! I was a rebel cool "
"YENNON!!!" Both Yennon's jumped (the younger one quickly putting out her cig), "Hey a** fondler! stare Are you coming home or not?!"
"No, Angel! You can tell our father I said 'GO TO HELL!' scream and I hope when he does, he pulls you under with him too!!"
"I thought you would say that! That's why I hired this burly guy to take you by force!! Come Marty!!"
Suddenly this big guy came in and threw Yennon over his shoulder kicking and screaming, "No!!! I don't want to go, PUT ME DOWN!!!" Her screams were heard going further and further away.
"... You loved your sister so." Koro said at last.
"Oh CAN it! stare I hated her, and my entire family. They wanted a boy emo and would joking call me their son. And when Angel had Tragic, she taught her to call me 'Uncle Yennon' to embarrass me."
"But... isn't Angel younger than you..?"
"... crying they wanted a girl that time!!!"
"Let's move on, I have one more thing to show you before we return!" Koro took Yennon's hand and started to lead her a few house down. "Do you recognize this place Mr. Scrooge?"
"Dont call me Mr. scream How dare y- eek Wait I remember this place. Wasn't I a apprentice here? neutral " Yennon stared at a tall building as Koro led them inside. There standing across the room was a lady. Wearing a Welsh wig. "Why it's old Ainian Fizziwig! She looks so... ALIVE eek you know she's dead, right?"
Ainian looked at the clock. Excitement written all over her face.
"Yennon, Willow!" She called. A younger Yennon and fellow Apprentice Clear Willow walked in.
"Why that's Willow! Oh man! Is this that night when we drank way to much eggnog and TP'ed some trees??" Yennon laughed.
"No more work tonight ladies! Close all the shutters and clear everything away!" Ain said to the girls as the two ran in such a rush. "It's almost time! Hurry Hurry!" Ainian called to them. Yennon and Willow cleared the floor so no a spot was left. Everything that could be packed off this floor was moved. Then Willow ran into the back and came out with a stereo. It was the holiday Christmas party. Everyone employed by Ainian came pouring in. Everyone and their families gathered as the music played. They laughed and danced as Yennon stood by herself, trying to look as though she didn't care for the festivities.
"What are we looking for Koro? I don't understand..." Yennon said just watching the party grow more joyful.
"We are waiting for her." Koro pointed to a woman who slowly approached Yennon. Yennon knew in a second who this lady was. She whispered to herself. "Kimmy..."
"Miss Scrooge..?" The sweet voice said to her.
"Hm? Oh its you. How are you Kimmy?" The young Yennon said to her.
"Miss Scrooge, wont you dance with me? Just once?" Kimmy said holding out her hand.
"Dance with you??" Yennon's eyes darted around the room. She was completely unsure of what to do, "I guess there's no harm in dancing. Sure, lets."
As older Yennon watched her young self dance she heard Koro whisper.
"Come, there's not much time left..."
The party started to fade away as a darker interior came into sight. Yennon could be seen sitting at her desk as a woman stood there. Dressed as if she was in mourning. The woman sobbed as Yennon kept her nose to her work.
"It matters little to you..." Kimmy said sobbing as Yennon let out a long sigh.
"What are you talking about? stare " Yennon said with her eyes still on her work.
"That I have been replaced... " Kimmy sobbed into her hands.
"Replaced?!" Yennon snapped her book shut and slammed it down, "What do you mean replaced?! I never had any intentions of marrying you!"
"You did! You said you would!" Kimmy's sobs become more heart wrenching.
"I was spineless then!" Yennon punched her desk utter frustration, "You just don't get it. I loved you then, I just don't feel that way now!" Yennon turned her back.
Kimmy looked up and glared at the back of Yennon's head, "No one falls out of love, Scrooge. You never loved me! You strung me along, you-"
"Get out woman!! scream I never want to see you again! LEAVE!!"
The older Yennon turned away, "Koro... take me from here. I don't want to see this anymore."
"Does it hurt to witness your own mistakes?" Koro asked softly.
Yennon looked as though she were miles away... "Its true, I never loved Kimmy. I did string her along. She loved me. I didn't have the guts to tell her I didn't feel the same about her. And I made promises I just could not keep." Yennon looked back in time to see Kimmy shut the door behind her, "The thing is... I did care very much for her." Suddenly Yennon pressed her hands to her ears, "Take me away, Koro!! Take me from here now!!"
But Koro could be heard through her fingers, "Remember Uncle Scrooge. You made these mistakes yourself."
"I'm an aunt!! gonk I'm an Aunt!!!" Yennon awoke fitfully. She stared at her empty dark room blankly for a minute or two before she whispered, "A dream..." She fell backward where she lay until the clock dinged twice.
Suddenly her room was aglow. Yennon got up and nervously tiptoed out of her room to the source of the light.
"HAHAHA!! Merry Christmas Miss Yennon! blaugh " A giant jolly woman bellowed.
"Wha... what the hell are you supposed to be!?! scream "
"I am Adie, the Ghost of Christmas Present. I have come to take you on a journey."
"Oh god gonk I've had enough, leave me be!!!" Yennon cried.
"Yennon. Look under my robe." Adie said with a very serious look on her face. Adie pulled her robe open, revealing two hams, "On the left is Honey Glazed. And on the right is Hickory Smoked. ... Which do you think will go best on a sandwich?"
"... Well gee, Mrs. Ghost, I guess it depends on the BREAD you use!!" Yennon said sarcastically.
"Sour Dough! biggrin "
"... Hickory Smoked stare "
"Very good. Now that that's settled, follow me!!" Adie scooped Yennon up with surprising speed and jumped through the roof, landing outside a crappy little house, "Look in here."
Yennon sighed and did as she was told. Inside was Pineapple Cratchit, sitting with her children. All of them wearing little fruit shaped hats, "Mommy! I'm starving! When will papa be home?"
Pineapple Cratchit smiled fondly and patted her head, "... Never. He's a jobless drunk, so I kicked him out."
Yennon's jaw dropped, "Her husband is GONE? On Christmas?!"
"Well, not quite." Adie pointed down the street as some guy wandered into the house.
"Honey! I'm home! I've brought food and Christmas presents!"
The children went crazy around the bag of food and toys as Pineapple stared at the man, "Duke. Where did you get these?"
"Why, from a store my dear wife! blaugh "
Suddenly someone shouted from behind Yennon, "THIS IS THE POLICE! DUKE! WE HAVE THE PLACE SURROUNDED!!! COME OUT WITH YOUR HANDS UP!!! scream "
"He robbed a store?! eek " Yennon exclaimed, "OH MY GOD!!" She shouted at the police busted into the house and pulled Pineapple's husband out by his feet, the smallest child clinging to him as she screamed, "No! Don't take my Papa!! gonk "
"This is the worst thing I've ever seen!!! crying "
"Yeah." Adie said as she shoveled pie into her giant mouth, "Your night is going to get far worse, trust me. HAHA!!"
"Why the hell are you laughing!? scream "
"Now look. This all could have been avoided if you had just given your employee a raise, and her husband a job. Even if you had just loaned the Cratchit's 300 gold, Duke wouldn't have robbed that store. Ultimately, this is your fault."
"Shut up! No it isn't scream I'm sure there's many places to find employment stare And besides. You heard her! She said Duke was a drunk."
"He wouldn't be a drunk if didn't have to drown his sorrows everyday. If he wouldn't, he may kill himself to rid himself of the heartache."
"And what's so wrong with that?! There's ENOUGH people in this world! and look at all these damn kids! Haven't they heard of condoms!?!? scream "
"If these events don't change, I see horrible outcomes where misery could have been avoided, had you only changed your ways. Even here... that child" Adie suddenly pointed at the smallest one in the Pineapple hat, "Won't make it."
"What..? Adie what do you mean?!"
"Scrooge, behind you."
Yennon spun around to see a dark demon of a man standing before her. Yennon looked back, but Adie and the Pineapple family were gone. Yennon looked up at the scary man and stared but a moment, "... Are you the Ghost of Christmas Future?"
The man nodded, and whispered in the freakiest way possible, "... Ned. ... Follow." and walked away.
Yennon followed behind him, with the strangest feeling as though many miles were passing beneath each step, Ned came to a stop and pointed at the hill before them. Yennon stepped closer and crouched at a tiny wooden cross, written on in black magic marker. It read, "Here lies Tiny Pineapple. May you always be sweet, and lovable." Yennon got up and quickly ran back to the Ghost of Christmas Future, "Tell me!! Tell me, can these things be changed!? Is it not to late to change them??" The ghost stared at her, "... Rude much!? scream What about me?? What happens to me in the future?" Suddenly they were in Yennon's room, where piles of gold were everywhere, "... This isn't so bad."
Suddenly a fat ugly mishapen Yennon came rolling down the gold hissing, "Goooooldsssss!!" as she drooled down the front of her shirt.
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! gonk EWWWWWWWWWWWW!"

***

Yennon's eyes shot open. She looked around breathing heavily.
"Oh man... gonk " Yennon sighed happily relieved she wasn't a huge disgusting mass. "Wait, what time is it!?" Yennon jumped up and ran to the window throwing open the curtains. Light beamed in and she threw open the window, "Its Christmas morning!!! Its here! I haven't missed it!!" Yennon quickly dressed and ran out the door, "Merry Christmas!! MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!" She shouted manically as she skipped, making children scream and run for cover, "YOU!!! STOP!!! scream "
Three men halted in their walk, watching wide eyes as Yennon came sprinting after them, jumping high into the air, and landing on Crim, "OMG! Call the loony bin, one got out!!! gonk " Bo shouted.
"Nonsense, nonsense!!" Yennon said as she hugged each one of them warmly, "HERE! Have some gold!!" She took three bags of gold from her coat pocket and tossed it at each of them, "Tell the poor I said merry Chistmas!! xd " Yennon skipped away merrily, leaving the portly gentlemen stunned.
Yennon skid to a stop and beat on a door, "Tragic darling!!! I've come to see you!! blaugh "
Tragic cracked the door a little, "... Uncle..? eek "
Yennon kicked the door in, and jumped on Tragic, "Hello dear!!! Where's your wife?"
"Tragic?? What's going on?!" A woman stood in the doorway to the kitchen.
"This is her! Her name is Kitten 4laugh " Tragic put an arm around her.
"HIII!!!" Yennon hugged her so tight Kitten gasped, "You're lovely! I have to go, but I'll be back for dinner! Bye!!" and Yennon darted outside.
"... Tragic, what the hell was that!?"
Yennon stopped at a store and filled a giant sack with toys and hotpockets, and random bottles of soda, laughing all the while! She paid for her purchases and ran quickly to the ghetto where Cratchit and her family lived, and knocked on the door.
Pineapple Cratchit couldn't believe her eyes when Scrooge burst through the door, "Miss Yennon!" She exclaimed, "I have the day off!!! gonk Please don't fire me!!"
"Merry Christmas Pineapple!" Yennon tossed a hotpocket at her, "I brought gifts for your strange fruit children! And I want you to take the sick one to the doctor and bill me. Yes, send me the bill! ... Oh, and send your husband to AA."
"... huh? I don't... I don't know what to say sweatdrop " Pineapple was dumbfounded.
"What do you mean go to AA? stare " Duke crossed his arms angrily.
"Don't worry Drunky McGee! I'll also give you a job, and raise both your wages!!"
"I love you Yennon!!" Duke scooped Yennon up and danced around with her.
"haha, yes yes, happy times blaugh ... Put me down stressed you smell like rum and shame! gonk "
"Sorry sweatdrop "
Yennon bent down to embrace the children, "Merry Christmas young-ens!! blaugh "
"Lanzer bless us, everyone!! blaugh " the youngest said.

The End!!

 

[Kitten 4 Him]

Quote:

"Yennon. Look under my robe." Adie said with a very serious look on her face. Adie pulled her robe open, revealing two hams, "On the left is Honey Glazed. And on the right is Hickory Smoked. ... Which do you think will go best on a sandwich?"

ROFL!!! I'm sorry ... I just had to report this. ^_^

EDIT: And these too ...

Quote:

Put me down stressed you smell like rum and shame! gonk

Quote:

Lanzer bless us, everyone!

And Kitten and Tragic got married? Flippin' sweet. That means I ... er ... she got Tragic all to herself! mrgreen ninja whee LOL.

Very nice guys!  

[Crimsonhellite]

I LURVE IT! Brightened my "black xmas" a bit....it musta took a bit to write. Well good job to all involved in its making! And Merry Xmas every 1! twisted twisted twisted twisted twisted twisted  

[xX-The Angel baby-Xx]

I liked the part where shes like "but isnt Angel younger than u?"
And Chelle is like "They wanted a girl that time! DX"  

[queennanami]

Lol Im glad you guys like it XD  

[Tragic l2abbit]

sorry for the caps but, THIS IS AWESOME! whee  

[ancantsia]

Lol I love Pineapple Hero!

It made me lol and feel warm and fuzzy inside! =3

 

[Duke_Azriel]

heart heart

 

[abandoned_nr_5448214]

I say, a job well done! biggrin  

[Ainiz]

Ha! Yen was MY apprentice. *is smug* rofl

This is totally awesome. I loved reading it. Nicely done ladies. 3nodding

 

[koromyst]

Wheee~
I'm a ghosty xD

Loved the story! (^O^)

 

[YennonCrow]

bump!