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 Posted: Sat Dec 05, 2009 10:44 pm
The day was warm for November, and Elke couldn't stay cooped up in that room any longer. So she'd begged and pleaded again, grabbed another book (the index of the encyclopedia Britannica, as it were) and headed out. It wasn't that she was looking for someone, because she wasn't. In fact, she was trying to avoid someone--namely, her boyfriend.
He was dead. Did that make him her ex?
She sniffed and rubbed at her eyes with her sleeve again. Crying would just make her miss an attacker, which would suck. She hadn't come so far to end up dead, again. Plus, being dead... Avery and Giselle were dead, but now Elke had a purpose for staying alive. She protected the Princess. Well, Virgo did. And Virgo was Elke.
Someone with pink hair was up the tree. Andeon, she thought, and dropped her book to climb the tree, which was hard work. Elke had never been much for physical work at all, and the tree didn't have any low-hanging branches. She wondered how in the world Andeon had made it all the way up there.
She was kind of surprised to find out he was a head. Not ahead of her, just. A head. A detached head.
Well, at least he wasn't bloody. And he couldn't get away.
"Hi, Andeon," she said as she clambered on top of a branch. "Was it you who stabbed me in the face with a vodka bottle?"
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shibrogane rolled 1 100-sided dice:
44
Total: 44 (1-100)
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Posted: Sat Dec 05, 2009 10:46 pm
[I FILLED IT IN THIS TIME. ********.]
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Posted: Sat Dec 05, 2009 10:57 pm
Andeon couldn't remember how he'd made it all the way into that tree. It had something to do with a bear, a bottle of vodka, and monopoly, but for the life of him he just couldn't remember the details. And so he had been sitting there for hours, singing Christmas Carols to himself in order to pass the time.
"On the twelfth day of Zombie Pines,
my zombies sent to me;
Twelve fires burning,
Eleven Mackie's shooting,
Ten Sues a-dicking,
Nine Azzo's sucking,
Eight Elles a-smoking,
Seven Ursulas sexing,
Six bitches decapitating,
Five dead zombiieeeees!
Four crazy Ganguros,
Three hot Kirins,
Two gunshot wounds,
And my head in a treeee!”
He was just finishing the last verse when a familiar voice asked him a question. Elke. Elke who had been a zombie. Elke who he couldn't see because he happened to be facing the other direction and thus could only assume she was still a zombie.
“BEGONE, VILE DEVIL WOMAN!” He shouted, his voice still somehow working despite the fact that his head had been severed above the place where is voice box should have been, “BY THE TITANS I WILL BLINK THEE TO DEATH.”
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Posted: Sat Dec 05, 2009 11:03 pm
She giggled. Unbelievably, she giggled at Andeon--at the singing, at the threat of blinking her to death, which she didn't think would work all so well. It was hard to be intimidated by a bodyless head. Sure, he was a zombie and if she wasn't careful she might get bitten, but what could he do if she kept her skin away from his mouth?
Blink her to death? Hee hee. Yeah, okay.
"I'm not vile," she said when the giggles had gone away, ignoring the accusations of being a devil woman. Elke reached out and picked up his head, turning it around to face her. "See? All alive now. You don't need to blink me to death anymore." He'd probably get really tired, doing that. "Where'd the rest of your body go? Didn't I see you before? You were rolling down a hill, you said you'd eaten a bug! How'd you get in this tree?" More importantly, where did the rest of his body go? She looked around for it, setting Andeon's head back in its niche in the tree, this time facing her. It was a good thing she wasn't afraid of heights, it really was.
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Posted: Sat Dec 05, 2009 11:10 pm
Well, she certainly didn't look like a zombie. In fact, she looked very decidedly not like a zombie. No green skin, no disfigured corpse, and most importantly...
“Hey, your face healed!” He exclaimed as she set him back down, answering her initial question, “I'd say I'm sorry about that, because you know you're super cute and if I still had my junk, I'd definitely hit that. But man,” he sighed, again somehow possible despite a lack of lungs, “You were kind of trying to eat people's faces, and I just wasn't down with that. Except for Sue. You can eat him. He's a d**k, you know.”
Andeon would have nodded, but doing so might have pitched him right out of the tree.
“I don't know,” he answered all of her question at once, squeezing his eyes shut as though trying to remember something. Nothing came to him. With another physically impossible sigh, he glanced up at her, “Elke, I have to question. First, why aren't you a zombie anymore? And second, can you please get this beetle leg out of my teeth, it has been bugging me for hours.”
Andeon grinned widely, exposing his front teeth. Between them there was, indeed, a beetle's leg.
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Posted: Sat Dec 05, 2009 11:20 pm
Aha! So she had been right! Oh, Andeon, you are such a jerk. Luckily, Elke had always been... more than willing to accept things when they happened to her. He should thank his lucky stars he hadn't vodka-bottled Giselle. "Thank you," she said cheerfully at the compliment, brushing her hair behind one ear. "But I don't think that's a good idea." Thinking of 'hitting that', well, it reminded her of Avery and her face fell.
Elke leaned forward as he continued to talk, putting her hands on her knees. "I don't remember trying to eat people. Was I really?" She froze, looking rather like a deer in the headlines of a Mack truck going at seventy miles an hour. The blood on her shirt. For a while, she'd just forgotten about it. Did Andeon know who she'd attacked? Nevermind--she didn't want to know. If she didn't know, it hadn't happened. Elke wanted very badly for that to have never, ever happened.
"Um... it's a complicated story," she said, leaning forward to pull the beetle leg out of his teeth with a disgusted look. She didn't like bugs. Or teeth. But whatever, he couldn't do anything to her. If he tried, she could drop him out the tree (though that would be awfully mean). "How did a beetle leg get in your mouth anyway, were you eating bugs? That's kind of gross." Well, he had said he'd eaten one when he rolled past her yesterday. She figured he probably hadn't recognized her, though, since she'd been Virgo and not Elke.
Pause. "You know, it's really rude to stab people with vodka bottles and leave them there. It took me hours to get it out."
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Posted: Sat Dec 05, 2009 11:27 pm
“Well, it's really rude to try and eat my goddamn face, but you don't see me crying about it.” Live, learn, gets Luvs, all that koombayah s**t, yeah?”
Andeon seemed quite a bit more irritable that usual, though that could be due to the fact that while all the other kids got to go have fun and eat people, he was stuck rolling around like some kind of reject dodgeball. He was the kid picked last on all the zombie raid teams, and that fact was just incredibly disheartening. He frowned up at Elke with those big green eyes.
“Someone left me on the ground and it crawled in my mouth while I was sleeping. Yesterday I think a fly laid eggs in my neck, and the day before that somebody kicked me down a hill and I landed ear-first in a pile of dog poo!” Andeon seemed outraged. I lieu of shaking his head, he rolled his eyes before returning that sad stare to Elke.
“Elke, will you carry me? I don't want to be alone anymore.”
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Posted: Sat Dec 05, 2009 11:44 pm
"I didn't try to eat your face!" Pause. "Did I?"
His face looked distinctly uneaten. She was sure if she had tried, his face would at least have a scratch on it. But then, she was turning out to be quite a failure as a girlfriend and a human, so she might have failed zombiehood too. "I'm sorry if I did," she said, "I don't remember doing anything." So she patted Andeon's head and crossed her ankles; that would keep her in the tree.
She giggled again. "That sounds terrible." At least she hadn't gotten dismembered. "I think I wanna hang out in the tree for a while, but when I go, you can come with me," she offered. "It'd be mean of me to just leave you, after all. And Hero won't complain because you can't move around and eat us in our sleep."
Elke gave him a thoughtful look after a moment. "You aren't going to bite me, are you?"
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Posted: Sun Dec 06, 2009 12:19 am
Andeon looked up at Elke, and he actually frowned a bit. Prior to Zombie Pines, seeing Andeon frown was about as frequent as a solar eclipse. Lately, however, the expression seemed all too common. He glanced up at her from beneath furrowed pink brows, his green eyes for once not shielded by his rose-colored glasses.
“It is a nice tree, isn't it?” He commented, glancing out over the school grounds. From their vantage point they could see everything from the burnt dormitories to the bodies that littered the grounds here and there.
“Thank you,” he said softly, “I don't think I can stand to sit here and look at this much longer. And yeah, you did kind of try to eat people. I think? When I came in you were already down, I just thought I'd smash a bottle into your face for good measure. Er... no hard feelings?”
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Posted: Sun Dec 06, 2009 12:43 am
Looking out over the devastation of the school, it was hard to feel optimistic about anything at all. Including her survival, even as Virgo. "No hard feelings," said Elke with a firm nod. "I was kind of a flesh-eating monster for a while there." And he'd never done anything to hurt her before, and now he was all alone. It wouldn't do to be mean, not at all. She patted his head again; it was something for her hands to do. "I'm sorry you got decapitated," she offered.
"Sorry I don't want to get down right away." With an apologetic look, she continued, "It's just, it took a lot of time to get up here. And I'm kind of tired of running from everyone, you know? It's... It's not..." She frowned. "Everyone asks why I'm human now. But I can't tell them, because if I do, I'll be breaking a secret that's not mine to break." Elke gazed at Andeon seriously. "You know?"
At least none of her friends were the bodies. Yet.
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Posted: Sun Dec 06, 2009 1:58 pm
“Thanks.” Andeon said in response to her apology. It was pretty damn unfortunate being decapitated, really. You couldn't do the 'You're Stupid' dance when somebody did something incredibly moronic. You couldn't point and laugh at someone you hated when they had their face eaten off by a bloodthirsty zombie. Hell, you couldn't even enjoy being a zombie because you were far too busy just sitting on the stump of your neck and wishing someone would come by and give you a little nudge with their foot so you could roll off to a more interesting view.
“I know, Elke,” Andeon said in response to her confession. And he did, in some strange way. Granted, he had no idea that Elke was now a super-powered defender of the universe, but he knew the burden of carrying a secret that was not yours to give away. “I won't pry if you do me one favor.”
He glanced up at her rather pitifully, “Scratch my nose?”
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Posted: Sun Dec 06, 2009 3:19 pm
Hanging around with Andeon's decapitated head kind of was like having a pet. Elke found herself hoping that Hero would let her keep him. (When she realized what exactly she was thinking, she froze up in temporary horror. Andeon was still a person, after all.)
"All right," she agreed, scratching his nose. "How'd you end up like this? If you don't mind me asking. You don't gotta answer if you don't want to. I know some stupid jokes I could tell instead."
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Posted: Sun Dec 06, 2009 10:14 pm
Andeon sighed happily as Elke's fingernails took care of the itch on his nose. He dredged up the memories of how he'd gotten like this from the depths of his already foggy mind, and relayed them to her sadly.
“Mackenzie and I were out looking for survivors,” he said sadly, “Benny caught us off guard but we took him down. And we were so happy, so ******** happy... we never saw the blue-haired b***h coming. One of them grabbed me by the throat, and I was so sure they were going to rip me apart. Mackenzie.. well.” He glanced up at Elke, a sad smile on his lips, “Mackenzie saved me from a much worse death.”
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Posted: Sun Dec 06, 2009 10:26 pm
She didn't want to know how he'd gotten decapitated, she thought, if that was how he died. "That's horrible," she said, voice soft with sympathy. With a sigh, she looked at the long drop down; holding Andeon, she could probably make it low enough to drop without hurting herself.
"Are you ready to go?" Elke was taking off her cardigan, presumably to wrap his head in. "I'll try not to fall out of the tree."
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