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I was in the car with my grandma, just coming back from the grocery store. We were talking, and she got on the subject of jobs. She asked me what I would like to do, and what are my plans for the future, since I am in ninth grade. Without any thought, since I pretty much have my mind up, I said 'a psychologist'. That is when the conversation went down hill:

Grandma: "Oh Kelsey, that is rediculious! Why would you want to have a job like that?"

Me: "Well, I'm interested in the human mind and behavior. Also, I would like a job that I could help people who need it. What is wrong with it? It's not like I'm going to go kill some one."

Grandma: "Well, why would you want to spend you life with a bunch of crazy people? Other people can do that job you don't need to. Have some one else do it."

Me [now slightly irriated]: "Like I said, I want to help people. And they are not crazy. They have mental problems which make them seem crazy. Just because they go to seek help, it doesn't mean that they are on the break of insanity. If more people would go to psychologist and listen to them, a lot of people could help get thier problems solved. Have you even considered taking grandpa with his depression? It could help. It is depressing enough for me to see him moping around. He has problems, but he isn't crazy."

*Quiet*

"I am scared to death of needles and other peoples' blood makes my stomach churn, so I'm not going to be a nurse. Plus, people are comfortable coming to me with thier problems, which is good since I would want to be a clinical psychologist. I am not interested in doing dad's job. Drafting and design isn't my thing. Heath care is. It may be Ash's, but it isn't mine."

*Quiet*

Grandma: "Well, you could get a malpractice suit."

Me: "Do you really think I haven't thought about that already? I have put alot of thought into what I want to do with my life."

[Note: this is the shorter, less angry version.]

There was more to it, but I don't want to bore you all with my story. My grandparents moved in with my dad and I a couple months ago. Now, there is tension in the air with my grandma and I because she, for some reason, thinks my possible job is immoral or something (even though she LOVES Dr. Phil). She never even bothered to ask me any questions about college, or the tutition cost. Or even what my minor would be.

She wants me to do what I wanted to do a few years ago, massage therapist. She believes this job is much more useful. She is giving the expression that I am not good enough for college, and my high school GPA is 3.585 on a four point scale. I am trying.

I have though this through alot, even what I want my major and minor to be, what classes I will take in high school to help me, and when I will start applying for scholarships. I have tried to plan this out thoroughly to the best of my ability.

She won't listen to anything I have to say about it, so it isn't helping. I tried talking to my dad, and he talked to her, but she is stubborn as a mule.

Any way I could try to release some of the tension, without having her make me feel like s**t?[Sorry for the language!]

Thanks for any help!

I would just avoid talking about it with her. It doesn't really have anything to do with her, and if all she does is make you feel bad, why bother? If she tries to bring it up, just ignore her or change the subject. It sounds like she has something personal against psychology or something, and it doesn't sound like you'll be able to change her mind.

You don't need to worry about that. You're doing more important things with your life. heart

1) Dr. Phil is NOT a psychologist. Just because an old bald man is spewing Oprah bullshit doesn't make him a psychologist. I just wanted to get that out right off the bat wink

2) Your grandma is a b***h. Not only is she trying to force you into a career that you don't necessarily want to do, she's also seriously hurting your grandpa by the looks of it. You mentioned that he has a problem and she seems to have such a skewed vision of what mental health care is (and people who seek it out really are all about) that she's stopping him from getting the help he may very well need.

She's not worth your time. She's just a shallow old woman stuck in her ways. Now, the fact that it's making your household yuchy is a completely different matter. I'm afraid I can't give you any advice here. Family dynamic is a really tough thing.

3) OMG! Psychologist! That is so awesome! Have you thought about what type yet? Like research/professor? Medical (in a hospital)? Or private office? Either way, that is so cool!

I'm taking a Psychology course right know. I needed a science credit to get my degree and that's the only one that actually looked fun. And it was clearly the right choice! It's so much fun! I actually look forward to class. It's the only course I am taking that I haven't missed once.

It's a lot of biology which is... hard. I'm not a science/math person usually, so I struggly with it a bit. But it's well worth it.

Anyways, I fully support your decision. Psychology is just so much fun! So you can tell your grandma that what she thinks doesn't matter because Kukushka supports you. K? mrgreen

Sorry I didn't post that soon, I had a concert this week so everything has been kind of crazy!

Kukushka, thanks! I am not the only one who thinks Dr. Phil is a nut!

I would like to be a counseling psychologist. Possibly have my own private office some day. I haven't really decided, since I figure in time I will decide. Luckly, I am good at science and math (my strongest subjects at the moment), so I don't think I will struggle too much with them.

Thanks once again, Nikolita, you're great!

Good luck with your major and courses in college!

Thanks!

You have every right to be upset. I know how your feeling. I want to be a criminal psychiatrist and every time I tell someone that they look at me like I'm a freak. They don't think I can do it because I have BPD. If your grandma refuses to accept your career path ignore it for now. When you get your career and she sees for her herself how great your doing, she'll change her tune. BTW I love the job decision.

I just hit the wrong vote on your poll. You have a right to be upset with her. It sounds like you have put a lot of work and thought into this option and are being realisitic about it. Her completely shooting you down and not supporting you at all is uncalled for.

For now I would recommend you just ignore what she says and try to avoid the subject around her for the sake of peace in the household.

It sounds like she has her own personal history with phycologists or knowledge of them that has made her distrust and dislike them. And while it sucks that she is trying to drag you into her thought process, it is you life, not hers. Do what makes you happy, because studying the classes in school that you like actually helps in getting better grades, and in general happiness with life.