|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 Posted: Sun Nov 29, 2009 3:17 pm
So I've been engaging in sex again recently with my new girlfriend, and I've run into a little bit of trouble, and I just wondered what "normal" is considered for "getting up."
Generally, after orgasming, I have little to no sexual drive, regardless of it being masturbation or real sex. I'm done, it's over, time to relax or do something else. Then it takes me hours to get sexual drive back, and the ability to get it up along with it. Is this normal? What is the average time for a guy to get his sexual drive back and/or be able to get it up? Is there any way to speed this up?
If her and I try to do it again so soon (a few hours) again after having sex, I can be into it (having sex drive again) but can't really get it up, or get it up all the way or long enough to do anything with it. I get a half hard-on or something, where it's kind of hard, but not hard enough to really do anything with. I'm just wondering what's average and if I should be worried about ED.
In other news, when we do have sex, I tend to go kind of quickly. She says she isn't disappointed and likes that I can go quickly because it means I find her sexy, but I would still like to last longer for her. Are there any tips or tricks for doing this? I read some once, to practice during masturbation but they all sounded very painful. Anyway, thanks!
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Nov 29, 2009 4:00 pm
What you described sounds normal and does not sound like erectile dysfunction.
Some people can go multiple times a day, sometimes with just a few minutes in between. Others need at least a few hours before they'll be able to go again. Some are really only interested once a day, if that. All of that is normal.
We all have different sex drives and require different "cool down" times. People vary in terms of how sensitive they are down there too. People who are sensitive often need longer in between because too much stimulation can actually get painful for them.
You might not be able to do a whole lot to change it. But getting really mentally in the mood can often help the body speed things up a bit. So something extra exciting like foreplay, porn, role playing, etc. might help get you back in action a bit quicker.
It's important for you to relax too though. If you worry about it or try to force it too much, sometimes that can make it even less likely to happen. If it doesn't look like it's going to happen, don't worry about it! You two can use a sex toy, have oral sex, have manual sex, or just go do something else! After all, most vaginas need a break too! Sex dries the v****a out, so too much of it can actually cause swelling, redness, and irritation, which can then increase the chance of infection.
The average guy only lasts a few minutes. So a lot of guys think they don't last long enough when they're actually falling right in the normal range. So you're probably normal there too. But if you want to make things last a bit longer, you can try condoms (they can dull the sensation a bit and make a guy last longer), c**k rings (they help a guy keep an erection for longer), or starting and stopping (a lot of guys will stop thrusting when they're near orgasm then start up again when the feeling starts to go away).
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Nov 29, 2009 6:23 pm
Like Lorien said I don't think it is anything to worry about. My boyfriend is convinced he can only orgasm once a day. I'm not so sure since he has never really attempted more than that, and I'd like to eventually find out if that's the case, but if it is the case, it doesn't bother me. Most guys have a a time period after orgasming where they can't be erect again, and I think the amount of time is different for everyone.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Nov 29, 2009 7:14 pm
My fiance has the same problem.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Nov 29, 2009 10:05 pm
To my knowledge, the time does differ from guys to guy. My boyfriend can often get hard again shortly after a first round, but usually he can't ejaculate again unless we go without a condom or he's extra horny.
Basically what Lorien said. 3nodding
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Nov 30, 2009 1:48 am
Phew, thank you. That is really a load off of my mind. sweatdrop
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Nov 30, 2009 7:26 pm
Just to add a side note...
you can get better at lasting longer by masturbating. It's not painful since you're not really doing anything physical to stop from ejaculating. It's really a mental thing, through practice you can figure out how or rather what to think to make yourself last longer. Another thing that comes from masturbation is that you can figure out what speeds make you come quicker and what 'spots' are more sensitive and therefore more likely to make you come faster. This way when you have sex you know a little of what and what not to do.
>Hope this helped. wink (just in case, i am a girl and i asked my boyfriend)
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Nov 30, 2009 8:48 pm
My bf takes about 5 hours before he is ready to go again. And sometimes if we have sex twice in a day and try to have it the next morning, he can't get hard at all.
It's normal, lthough the exact times differ from guy to guy.
About how long guys last: My guy would probably only last 5 minutes if we didn't stop at all. But we like it to last a long time, so he lets me know if he is too close, and we will slow down/stop for a few seconds, or chnage positions.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Nov 30, 2009 11:54 pm
!namorata About how long guys last: My guy would probably only last 5 minutes if we didn't stop at all. But we like it to last a long time, so he lets me know if he is too close, and we will slow down/stop for a few seconds, or change positions. Same here. smile Sometimes we don't stop but he'll still last much longer than usual, for whatever reason(s).
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Jan 15, 2010 11:24 am
Meta_Fish So I've been engaging in sex again recently with my new girlfriend, and I've run into a little bit of trouble, and I just wondered what "normal" is considered for "getting up." Generally, after orgasming, I have little to no sexual drive, regardless of it being masturbation or real sex. I'm done, it's over, time to relax or do something else. Then it takes me hours to get sexual drive back, and the ability to get it up along with it. Is this normal? What is the average time for a guy to get his sexual drive back and/or be able to get it up? Is there any way to speed this up? If her and I try to do it again so soon (a few hours) again after having sex, I can be into it (having sex drive again) but can't really get it up, or get it up all the way or long enough to do anything with it. I get a half hard-on or something, where it's kind of hard, but not hard enough to really do anything with. I'm just wondering what's average and if I should be worried about ED. In other news, when we do have sex, I tend to go kind of quickly. She says she isn't disappointed and likes that I can go quickly because it means I find her sexy, but I would still like to last longer for her. Are there any tips or tricks for doing this? I read some once, to practice during masturbation but they all sounded very painful. Anyway, thanks! it really depends for me, depending on how attracted I am to the girl and how much fun and enjoyment I get out of the sex, sometimes it may only take 5 minutes before Im ready to go again, try spicing sex up and trying new things
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat Jan 16, 2010 10:03 pm
I had a problem like this once too, i found it is jsut a mental and emotional thing at times, we started and i went three hours in her without endding and we jsut gave up for the day but the next day we went again and i finished long before she ever did. so it is just one of those things that happen from time to time.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Reply
