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Konoha, Suna, Iwa, Getsu, Kiri, and Otogakure's conjoined profile and resource guild. 

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General Douch

PostPosted: Sun Nov 29, 2009 10:22 am


Carmen

Carmen Uchiha

Age
14

Height
5' 8"

Weight
109 lbs

Eye Color
White

Hair Color
White

Village
Konoha

Clan
Uchiha

Village Rank
Chunin

Other Titles
List here

Appearance Description
Carmen has white hair, with white eyes. She keeps all her weapons in her belt, around her white and pinkish skirt. She has red gloves on her arms that are laced on the back.

Personality
Carmen is an outgoing, caring, and hyperactive ninja. She loves making friends but when battle comes she becomes serious. She is a strong female ninja.

History
When a battle went on ages ago, Madara Uchiha verses the first hokage. They fought for the hokage position. In battle, a group of Uchiha's ran from battle to the lightning village. The Uchiha clan grew there as well as in Konoha. Carmen was born in the generation over in the lightning village. No one knew of this second Uchiha clan, cause they were in hiding. Carmen's father killed of the second Uchiha clan but Carmen and her brother James escaped. James died a year later by a disease also known as the Plague. Carmen entered as a ninja in the Konoha village.



_________________________________



Primary Element
Fire

Secondary Element
Wind




_________________________________




Jutsu and Skills

Stats
Ninjutsu: 6/7
Genjutsu:2/7
Taijutsu: 5/7

Total Jutsu Learned/Learnable
Genin Justu-2/4:: Chuunin Jutsu-2/2:: Jounin Jutsu-2/2:: Kage Justsu-0/0::

Ninjutsu

Fire style: Fire storm Justu
Rank: Chunin
Ninja makes handsigns and spits out fire in the air. Ninja also uses wind element to make a hurricane, any size they learned to control. Wind swirls the fire and makes it a Fire Hurricane. Fire Hurricane hits opponent taking severe damage.

Shadow Clone Justu
Rank: Jounin
Ninja makes a solid clone. Not a fake one.

Multi Shadow Clone Justu
Rank: Jounin
Ninja Makes numerous shadow clones.

Fire style: Fireball Justu
Rank: Genin
Ninja makes a fireball using element.

Fire style: Pheonix Fireball
Rank: Chunin
Ninja makes tons of fireballs and shoots at Opponent. In the fireball is big windmill shurikens. When opponent dodges all fireballs, they don't expect there to be hidden weapons.

Taijutsu

Lions Barrage
Type: Genin
Ninja kicks opponent into air. Ninja kicks from all angles hitting opponent then kicking them making them hit the ground hard.

Multiple Lions Barrage
Type: Chunin
Makes numerous clones and they all kick there opponent like Lions Barrage.

Genjutsu

Genjustu Binding
Type: Chunin
The user binds the opponent in a genjutsu, rendering them incapable of movement. Once the target is bound, the user or an ally can rush up to the enemy, able to easily deliver a devastating killing blow.

Demonic Illusion: Tree Bind Death

Type: Jounin
With this jutsu, the user can make themselves disappear, allowing them to approach their target unnoticed. Once completed, a tree and roots will grow at the target's feet and restrict their movements. Once the opponent believes that they are captured, the user can then appear above their opponent from the tree's trunk and kill the target.

Chakra Control

Water Walking.
Rank: Genin
Ninja Controls chakra and walks on water

Tree Climbing
Rank: Genin
Ninja controls chakra and walks up a tree to the top.

Kekkei Genkai (Clan Specialty)


Tsukoyomi
Rank: Only Mangekokyo Sharingan can do it.
Ninja with Sharingan looks into the eyes if opponent for this justu to work. Happens in 3 seconds tops. There are 3 stages of pain. First stage, physical pain. Second stage, They fall in a deep pit that never ends. Third, Emotional and Mental Pain. Repeats Tragedy in life over and over.


_________________________________


Equipment, Items, Other

Weapons
10x Kunai
10x Shuriken
3x Windmill Shuriken
1x Katana

Armor
No armor

Accessories
None

Miscellaneous
Wolf named Shadow
PostPosted: Sun Nov 29, 2009 12:10 pm


I haven't even read over the majority of it. But I can tell you a few things already ma'am.

One is that we don't accept Long Lost members of the Uchiha clan or anything of that ilk. The Uchihas are well covered in the series as being the last ones alive and we're sticking with that.

Two, all new characters start at either Genin or Academy Student Ranks, with the appropriate stats, at best no more than one genin level jutsu as well.

Now I can go look over your character more carefully, I want to see what you are hoping to accomplish and what sort of plot and adventures you have in the back of your head for this character. It might be possible to have a very similiar character, with the same feel, goals, and personality while beign within the rules. If you're willing to talk it out, tell me what you want, I'll help show you what's available and we can get this thing hammered out, okay?

I know you may find the rules annoying, but they're here for a reason.

And if that doesn't help you, just remember a true axiom of design philosophy and creativity, "Rules breed creativity, not stifle it."

Arcturus Highwind
Crew


Shokaku Kaien
Crew

PostPosted: Sun Nov 29, 2009 12:23 pm


After peeking over the jutsu, the stat point allocation, and the overall detail I'd say we probably have a school candidate here, even taking away the Uchiha factor.

While I ain't a mod I do offer some services that might help get you on the right track. First I suggest you read over the full character creation process and think up some ideas for a non-Uchiha character, preserving whatever details you can, and from there we can work on fleshing out some more detail and giving it more of the literate factor with proper balance.
PostPosted: Sun Nov 29, 2009 12:42 pm


No to a few things.

No to your Uchiha

No to your Chuunin

All characters new to the rp start as Genin. We don't take Uchiha Characters unless you want to play as a corpse through the rp Or a ghost which would be interesting in the rp.

Now your history of the Uchiha survival is interesting, but flawed. For one I don't think a small part of the large uchiha clan would allow them to flee, they banished Manda for going against Konoha.

On returning I don't think the Lighting Ninja would allow them to leave. The tried to kidnap a child to acquire the Hyuuga eye type I would dought they would let the mighty Sharingan slip from their fingers.

In all you filled the profile out very nicely. You would just need to make a character thats a normal joe or with a less extincted clan ( made up or a more commonly found canon)

Ocramol

Quotable Survivor

5,550 Points
  • Gaian 50
  • Statustician 100
  • Signature Look 250

-Darkness_Complex-
Crew

6,900 Points
  • Person of Interest 200
  • Member 100
  • Voter 100
PostPosted: Sun Nov 29, 2009 12:56 pm


To quote the Character Rules topic created by Mrs. Tsunade of the Sannin. I've underlined the specifics that I want you to read:

Quote:
1. All characters must comply with the storyline of the Naruto universe up to the point of the timeskip.

What does this mean?
It means that:

  • Extinct clans remain extinct. This includes Uchiha, Kaguya, ect.


Quote:
5. All Ninja applicants will start at the GENIN or ACADEMY STUDENT level.

For children characters under the age of (about) 10, they would more realistically be an Academy Student, rather than a Genin.

Once you've passed the Chuunin Exams (which are held with all the guilds together every few months) your rank will be updated if you pass the test. From then on, you can also participate in trials to become Jounin.


Also, we have been enforcing the idea that when you start a brand new profile, that you only come in with a single jutsu. This is so that you, as an individual, can grow in our community and become a more fully-developed character.

I like that you spent time on the profile and you have clearly thought through your fire techniques, but there are a few things I'd like to point out.

1. Shadow Clone Jutsu: Not only is this a canon technique, it is also a forbidden technique and possession of it's knowledge is border-line illegal, as evident by how much work Naruto had to go through with his scroll stealing just to get his hands on it.

2. Lions Barrage: Is a canon technique, created by Gai, taught to Rock Lee, copied by Sasuke and also copied by Naruto. In order to have a technique like this, we require that your character receive In Character training from one of those four canon characters. This isn't an entirely impossible task and I'm certain if you worded a PM requesting this training nicely, any of the moderators would be happy to assist you.

3. Genjutsu Binding: I like the idea, but what you need to remember is that a Genjutsu can be broken with a simple Kai technique. What I would suggest, is that while the person is mentally trapped in the Genjutsu, that you physically bind them down using something like chains or ropes. That would actually be a rather effective technique.

4. Demonic Illusion: Tree binding Death: I want you to focus on exactly what a Genjutsu is. Think of it like a mirage, you are causing the brain to think it is seeing something that is not actually happening. You aren't actually a part of the jutsu, so you as a character can move around and do whatever you want while they are trapped within it. Genjutsu can be simple, things such as as casting an illusion where a person thinks the paper they are signing is a gift-card for a long-time friend, while in actuality they are signing a document selling there first born child into slavery. They can also be complex, making the person believe they are surrounded by dangerous traps, scaring them away from moving while in actuality you are using the time that they spend in your illusion binding their hands and feet so that you can haul them off to jail. If you have been keeping up-to-date on the television show Heroes, think about the mind games that Sylar/Matt were playing against each other earlier in the season, it was never OVERTLY dangerous, just simple tricks of the mind that caused the other to stumble into something horrible.
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