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Posted: Tue Nov 24, 2009 8:23 pm
I have a number of questions and wasn't sure where else to post this, so here I am.
I'm eighteen and I've never been on a date before. For the longest time I didn't want to date or start a relationship with anyone; I was scared of getting hurt; I didn't believe I deserved a relationship; and I didn't want to upset my mom. But recently I've tossed all of that out the window. I've grown more as a person and matured and I'm not scared of getting hurt, I do believe that I deserve a good relationship, and my mom isn't an issue anymore because I'm not letting her have such control over that aspect of my life like she did in the past. I'm more confident in myself and I love the person I am. I'm ready to get into a relationship. I've been interested in a guy who I work with for almost three months, he and I know one another and eat lunch together on our breaks and talk often enough at work. On Saturday he asked for my number and then asked if I wanted to go out with him some time. I told him that I'd like to. I'm still waiting for him to call and set up the date. So now to the questions.
This will be my first date ever. I am nervous and I have no clue what happens now a days on dates, what's acceptable and what's not, and what's considered to be going too far affection wise. I don't know if it would be silly to let my date know that I'm nervous, or if it would make me seem pathetic if I were to admit to him that I've never been on a date before.
I just need some advice, please sweatdrop I really like this guy and I'm hoping that after a couple dates, a relationship will develop.
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Posted: Tue Nov 24, 2009 8:33 pm
I can't say much on this partictular subject seing as I have not been on a date my self, but I can almost guarantee that if he likes you enough to take his time, and respectfully ask you out, telling him you are nervous would not seem pathetic at all, I can't speak for him, but I myself would find that really sweet, that somebody could be so open about a thing they're worried about.
Regardless, I hope you have a great first date ^_^
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Posted: Tue Nov 24, 2009 9:16 pm
Every person, every date, and every relationship is very different.
Nothing is really "going too far" as long as both people are comfortable with it. But you're also certainly not obligated to do anything just because you're on a date either. Some people hold hands. Others kiss. Others hug at the end of the night. Others have sex. Others have no physical contact at all. It all depends on what both people want, feel is right at the time, and are comfortable with.
It's fine to let him know you're nervous. It's ok to let him know that you've never been on a date before either. Plenty of people your age haven't been on a date. Heck, a lot of people nowadays haven't been on a conventional date. A lot of people just go from "friendship" to "relationship" without any actual dates in between. And if that's what they both want, that's ok too.
So don't worry about it. There isn't really a right or wrong way to date. Feel free to let him sort of take the lead if that makes you feel more comfortable, but don't be afraid to tell him if you're not comfortable with something either. 3nodding
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