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 Posted: Mon Nov 02, 2009 2:49 pm
For one of my best buddies. See, she has problems (who doesn't?) but when she gets really mad or sad, she hurts herself. She doesn't cut, thank God, but she'll either dig her nails in, usually until it's to the point of almost bleeding, or she'll bite her hand. Which also leaves marks. And it hurts me to see her hurting herself. So my question for you guys is, how can I help her without pushing her further away?
edit: And yes, I am going to see the school counselor tomorrow to get some advice, but I won't use names.
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Posted: Mon Nov 02, 2009 3:19 pm
Try to help her understand that its only hurting her more to hurt herself then to express her feelings through something else.. try to encourage her to keep a diary and write things down instead. Or, what I used to do when I was struggling with that, write down whats doing to so mad/hurt then skribble it to death and stab the paper with the pen.. wad it in a ball and burn it. It helps quite I bit. That's the best advice I could give you without going religion on you. *haha* But, it would be very wise to talk to the school counselor tomorrow.
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Posted: Mon Nov 02, 2009 3:29 pm
k, thanks dooz. I'll try to persuade her to do something like that. And I guess I'll just have to wait and see what the counselor has to say...
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Posted: Mon Nov 02, 2009 3:57 pm
For experience i can say that writing really helps. It's a way to sort of get out emotions and calm down. Just in general though, let her you're there for her and she can talk to you whenever she gets upset, she may not take you up on it, but just knowing is comforting.
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Posted: Mon Nov 02, 2009 4:09 pm
Yeah, I used to have a really hard time with hurting myself, not many people know, even to this day that I had problems with it. Its hard to overcome, she's going to need to know that you love and care about her, even when she feels like she doesn't deserve to be treated like a human. And like Boo said, letting her know that you'll be there for her to talk really helps, even if she doesn't take you up on it, knowing that she has someone to talk to if she needs it, always helps.
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Posted: Mon Nov 02, 2009 4:26 pm
I don't know enough about this to give this advice, but you can make the call about whether or not this appropriate.
If she turned the anger and energy thereof towards what the actual problem is, it might help. If she's gone that far, it's hardly going to get worse.
If the problem is herself, then that's a bad idea.
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