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| Should I tell my mom? |
| Wait it out... |
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22% |
[ 4 ] |
| Just get it over with. |
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16% |
[ 3 ] |
| Never tell her XD ! |
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5% |
[ 1 ] |
| Tell other family members first and then work your way to her. |
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33% |
[ 6 ] |
| Other |
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22% |
[ 4 ] |
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| Total Votes : 18 |
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 Posted: Sat Dec 03, 2005 10:27 am
She keeps bringing up homosexuality in conversations, and often she'll say homophobic things.
I'm starting to get paranoid ninja !
And I'm starting to take what she says to heart, like I'm a pervet or something crying . Maybe it'd be easier to just turn my feelings off. AArgh!
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Posted: Thu Dec 08, 2005 1:29 pm
Hmmm... that is quite the pickle. Perhaps it would be best if you just came out and told her. It's true that that doesn't always work best, but being forthright and honest is something that people respect. So my advice; Tell her but be subtle about it.
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Posted: Thu Dec 08, 2005 8:44 pm
I say wait it out untill you feel that it's the best time. With her saying homophobic comments, I dont think it'd be the best thing to do right now.
And dont feel perverted about who you are. There is nothing perverted about it. It IS natural, and it certainly isn't a disease. I have a neighbor. She's really old but she doesn't have any children. I think of her like a grandmother, and I told her that I was lesbian and that I had a girlfriend. She hugged my neck.. and told me that I am who I am, and that I shouldn't let anyone change me. That's what you should do. No matter how much your mom throws s**t at you, you be yourself. And you be proud.
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Posted: Fri Dec 09, 2005 11:21 pm
AkureiKnight I say wait it out untill you feel that it's the best time. With her saying homophobic comments, I dont think it'd be the best thing to do right now. And dont feel perverted about who you are. There is nothing perverted about it. It IS natural, and it certainly isn't a disease. I have a neighbor. She's really old but she doesn't have any children. I think of her like a grandmother, and I told her that I was lesbian and that I had a girlfriend. She hugged my neck.. and told me that I am who I am, and that I shouldn't let anyone change me. That's what you should do. No matter how much your mom throws s**t at you, you be yourself. And you be proud. I like this advice better than mine ^_^
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The Committee Staff Gaian
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Posted: Sat Dec 10, 2005 3:00 pm
Well, since your Mom keeps bringing up these conversations about gay people, then counter with your own. The next time she gets on you about being gay, ask her what she'd do if you were? Tell her it's a "hypothetical" question, and that you're just curious because of the way she talks about it with a contradicting manner. Or something like that. Then, you'll know how she truly feels towards her own kids being what they are. If she seems to be rather cool with it, then I'd tell her. If she says she'd have to kick you out or have you reformed through the lord, then I wouldn't tell her. Unless you can avoid reformation, because that can really screw you up. Try having a heart to heart with her on the topic excluding yourself, so that you guys can become better understanding. It mgiht help. That's the best I can offer you. Good luck sweetie!
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Posted: Sat Dec 10, 2005 3:23 pm
AkureiKnight I say wait it out untill you feel that it's the best time. With her saying homophobic comments, I dont think it'd be the best thing to do right now. And dont feel perverted about who you are. There is nothing perverted about it. It IS natural, and it certainly isn't a disease. I have a neighbor. She's really old but she doesn't have any children. I think of her like a grandmother, and I told her that I was lesbian and that I had a girlfriend. She hugged my neck.. and told me that I am who I am, and that I shouldn't let anyone change me. That's what you should do. No matter how much your mom throws s**t at you, you be yourself. And you be proud. I completely agree. 3nodding You shouldn't be ashamed. It's who you are and you can't be ashamed of that. You're following how you truly feel and that's most important.
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Posted: Sun Dec 11, 2005 11:47 am
Maybe you should talk to her and tell her that even though you're "not gay" it still bothers you when she makes homophobic comments because some of your friends are gay and you don't think it's wrong.
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Posted: Fri Dec 16, 2005 10:21 pm
I think you should just tell her. Perhaps if she found out that you were gay, then she would stop making those types of comments. Perhaps you could teach her to be more tolerant. Or something.
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Posted: Sat Dec 17, 2005 8:34 pm
Claena Maybe you should talk to her and tell her that even though you're "not gay" it still bothers you when she makes homophobic comments because some of your friends are gay and you don't think it's wrong. This could work
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Posted: Sat Jan 28, 2006 10:58 am
well, I came out this summer. I remember being on the phone with my mother who lives across the state thank whoever, and she said I said I was gay, and she got so silent, and I said just joking, and she was like whew, and don't scare me like that, and when you were a kid we were worried, and thank god you're not gay now, and blah blah blah, and when I came out this summer, one grandma was real nice about it, my mother was like just don't get married and have kids. I don't believe they should marry, and her mother and her brother were all like calling me a thing, saying them gay people they are real smart, and blah blah blah, and i'm like grandma we're not gay people, we have names, and anyone can be smart or stupid, it depends on the person, not on how they love.
I don't know eventually after a while things settled down, but I live with a dad whose brother is gay, and whose mother taught him you can be whatever, and so he doesn't really care. and I don't live with my mother and her husband who is extremely homophobic.
Some say that you should wait until you move out before you tell your parents. Although I would wait until I moved out, and would move to another state if I was gonna have kids, cause I saw something on tv, about two ladies who really loved each other, and they had a son, and the grandmother got mad, and filed for custody rights, and she got full custody of the son just cause the mothers were gay and lived together sad after that I said I am playing it safe.
as far as telling your mom, perhaps you should ask her, what would you do if one of your kids were gay, although that is usually a straight give away sometimes. But there has to be away to ask her, without sounding obvious or something?
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Posted: Thu Feb 09, 2006 3:55 pm
D: Aww. That really is a problem.
My mom is acting really odd because I have a gay-friend online.
-cough- We are kind of love eachother...... DD:;
She keeps bringing her up. o_o;
And she keeps asking if I'm gay... My mom is weird like that, she doesn't sound happy when she asks me.
.... o___O Weird part is... My mom is a lesbian.
-sigh- I really have no clue what you should do...
D:; My vocal teacher is gay... And for like, fourteen years his mom has known...
And she basically hates him for it. D: It was really depressing to learn this about my teacher, too.. He's so nice...
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Posted: Sat Feb 11, 2006 9:58 am
I really don't have any good advice, as, obviously, I haven't had to deal with being a lesbian (and hopefully, I won't have to *points at self-pic in sig*) . . . But I have to say . . . I find the "I'm in such a pickle" comment ironically funny.
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Posted: Sat Feb 11, 2006 1:16 pm
Aw man. This reminds me about how my mom acted before things blew up. The reason she kept asking me if i was gay was because she had been reading my journal for months without me knowing it, and going on the computer if I left it to use the bathroom or anything, just to see what i post on Gaia. (i control the computer's web history now. ninja bwahaha.)
But you should really make sure to keep an eye on your mom now, if this might be the case with you too.
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Posted: Sat Feb 11, 2006 3:16 pm
I wouldn't suggest telling her sweatdrop . I told my mom becuz even tho she made homophobe comments every now n then I figured since her personality was usually so chill she wouldn't care. But she did ninja . N if your mom is bein all buttweaselish I'd wait until you were outta the house or something, unless you think you can handle the heat xp . I'm glad I came out, n if I had to do it all over again, I still would but you might wanna wait a little. Feel your mom out, n try to determine her response. From what you said it sounds like she's saying she doesn't want to kno in a weird way, which might be confusing but my mom is very similar to how you described yours. I hope that made sense sweatdrop .
Anywayz, even if your mom is saying your "unnatural" n junk (my mom said the same thing to me when i came out) just remember being a lesbian is perfectly normal. It's just different. N never try to turn your feeling "off". That will only lead to negative repercussions ninja . I would suggest you become more confident in yourself before coming out becuz people may react badly n you will need alot of strength in yourself to stand up to them n be like "NO, I AM NOT UNNNATURAL stressed !" You might wanna check out a few suppport websites or something, or maybe come out to a close friend for moral support. When I came out, even tho my mom was slightly displeased, my friends were very supportive 3nodding .
HOPE THAT HELPED sweatdrop xd .
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