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Reply Chisel and the Stone (Writing only
Intro?

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So, your thoughts?
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  Moar!
  Destroy!
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zfatal
Captain

Toothsome Fairy

PostPosted: Sat Oct 17, 2009 10:51 pm


Below is an intro that I wrote in probably two minutes' time. I plan to expound on this concept right here in great detail. 'Es m'next story!

((Will probably not be a role play.))

Quote:
I am at war with supernatural. Supernatural is not some collection of freakish monsters, and not any kind of creature that is ruled by rules. There is no set of defined weaknesses to vanquish what I want to kill. What supernatural is, cannot be defined. There is not the supernatural. There is only it, me, and the rest of the forsaken world.
Supernatural is less than a force. Supernatural is more than fantasy or fiction. There are many incarnations of supernatural, and many types of people like me. None see it clearer than I do, though. Of course, that’s what every single one of me would say. I suppose there’s only one reason for you to believe me, though; I’m the one holding a knife to your throat. You’ve just become my bait, so shut up, stay quiet, and maybe you’ll survive the night.
 
PostPosted: Sun Oct 18, 2009 6:41 pm


Accepting constructive criticism?

Breadfishe
Crew


zfatal
Captain

Toothsome Fairy

PostPosted: Sun Oct 18, 2009 6:54 pm


Er... why, no. Why would I ever do that?
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Yes. I do accept constructive criticism.
I always accept constructive criticism.
PostPosted: Sun Oct 18, 2009 7:33 pm


Just asking.

-

Anyway, "shut up, stay quiet," personally, unless there's an AND in there somewhere, it sounds a teensy bit redundant. That's all, just a bit of grammar.

Breadfishe
Crew


zfatal
Captain

Toothsome Fairy

PostPosted: Sun Oct 18, 2009 7:51 pm


Well, the thing you have to note is that grammar doesn't apply inside of parentheses. I myself find no mistakes in grammar in there, but even if you do, it is what is being said, so... it doesn't really matter that much.
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Chisel and the Stone (Writing only

 
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