If you have been keeping up with NASA, then you would know that they are blowing a huge-a** chunk out of the moon for the sheer fun of it.

" So, Rockney, can I barrow your spaceship to go watch that hug-a** explosion on the moon?" I asked, Rockney ruffled his gotee and looked up from his work.

" Keys are in my coat pocket," said Rockney. I looked over at his coat, the essence of evil permiated from it. No one ever touched his coat, it was more than likely the source of Rockney's awesome; more than 200,000,000,000,000 times more concentrated than 999,999,999,999 thongs of power.

" Uh, could you get them?" I asked, I shuddered.

" Your gonna have to wait," said Rockney," I have to take something to Underground." Rockney turned to dust and wisped away in the wind down toward Underground's Office.

" Ara! Get your crap and leave damn it!" yelled Underground," your only putting off the inevitable."

" Frack!" I yelled, as Ebilshady caught me reaching into Rockney's coat.

" Uh, what are you doi--nope, i don't want to know," she said, walking off. Rockney's coat started to glow a deep red and unhooked itself from the rack.

" I'm free!" said the Coat, in a noobish voice.

" Uh, hi?" I said, looking at the coat.

" hello there, could I interest you in some pot?" asked the Coat.

" Uh, no, but you can give me Rockney's keys to his spaceship," I said," I am going to go watch a hug-a** crater be created by reckless NASA drivers."

" Can I come?" asked the coat, already smoking on the pot.

" I don't see why not," I sai," Lennons, me and Rockney's coat are going to the moon."

" I don't give a damn!" said Lennons from across the room.

" Love you too," I said, walking out the door and into the garage. Row upon row of Spaceships were lined up.

" The one on the left," I said.

" Shotgun!" screamed the coat, hopping up front. I turned up American Pie on the radio and revved the engine twice, then shot off for the moon.

" Hey, there is the NASA ship!" I exclaimed, looking out the side of the ship.

" Park over there for a closer view," said Rockney's Coat. I flew over to the north pole and landed the ship.

" Nice view," i remarked, dawning my Standard Issue Gaian Space Suit.

" Well, bye," said the coat, disappearing.

" What the fu--" I looked up and saw the NASA ship heading right for my ride home," No!" The whole area blew up in a dust storm, sending me into outerspace.

" No coat is outsmarting me!" I yelled, I grabbed my canteen and shot water in the direction way from earth. As I fell back into the Atmosphere, my suit caught on fire. I streaked (literally) over France and slammed into the atlantic ocean. I stood up on the water and began to walk all 100 miles back to the US. I stood on the beach, wearing nothing but the leopard-skin thong of power.

" Coat!" I yelled running back into the guild.

" Bwahh! how did you survive?" asked the coat, nerviously.

" With the thong of power!" I exclaimed, holding the thong above my head.

" Put it back on!" said Underground.

" Coat, your screwed!" I said. As I said this, rockney appeared in the coat and held his hand out; i flew back and slammed into the wall.

" Don't you ever threaten a man's coat," sid Rockney, walking away.
Several hours later, Lennons got home to see her box with Nicole Richie in it. She shouted with glee and locked it away.