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Is girls’ night out really a cover for her affair?

According to popular media, men are much more likely to cheat than women, but in reality, women are stepping out on their men more and more often these days. The classic lipstick on the collar won’t give away your wife or girlfriend’s infidelity, but she may be throwing you signals that you don’t recognize. If you suspect your lady friend of sneaking around with some other guy behind your back, look for these indicators that something’s up.

Ladies, if you think your man is sneaking around behind your back, Matthew has the proof over in Message From Mars.


More Time With The Girls

If your partner is going to need an alibi for the times that she’s with her lover, she’s likely to use her circle of girlfriends as a backup story. Some of them might even be in on it, but it’s most likely that she’ll tell you she’s hanging out with an old friend you’ve never met or some colleagues from work you haven’t yet been acquainted with. Of course, it is possible that the extra time she’s been spending with the girls is actually what she says it is, but if you already suspect her of cheating, her having new girlfriends who are unknown to you is a bad sign.


She Looks Good

Most women cheat on their partners in order to get something they are lacking at home. Often what the other man provides is the kind of awe and praise you used to give her when you first started seeing each other. A new, exciting guy can make her feel sexy, desirable and interesting in a way that makes her feel very good about herself. When a woman is carrying on an affair, she often starts taking better care of herself. She might join a gym, get her hair done or buy new clothes. If you notice that your girlfriend or wife is making significant improvements to how she looks and you have other reasons to suspect an infidelity, this may be more evidence to back up your theory.


Your Sex Life Changes

If your partner is having an affair, it will inevitably affect your sex life with her. Some women will be much less interested in having sex with you if they’re having great sex with another man. On the other hand, the affair may be increasing her self-confidence and improving her body image to the point that her sex drive goes through the roof. In that case, you might find yourself having more sex with your girlfriend or wife than ever before. Remember, if this is the only change that your partner has made, it’s likely that it’s connected to something other than infidelity, but if you have reason to suspect her, this kind of change in behaviour could be another indication that she has something to hide.


She Doesn’t Notice You Flirting

Not only might she be rejecting your advances towards her, she also might disregard you flirting with other women when she’s involved in an affair. When a person is caught up in the excitement of secret rendezvous and illicit meetings, details like who their partner is spending time with or hitting on at a party become inconsequential. This is especially true if she’s given up on your relationship, but hasn’t come around to breaking it off yet. In situations where she’d normally be jealous or threatened, she now seems simply not to care. This is not a good sign. Even if she’s not having an affair of her own, if she simply doesn’t care that you’re paying attention to another woman, you’ve got trouble in your relationship.


What Can Be Done

If you notice some of these warning signs of an affair, the first thing to do is talk to a close and trusted friend about it. Outline your evidence and see what he or she thinks. If they agree you have cause to be worried, the next step is to bring it up with your girlfriend or wife. Try not to be confrontational or accusatory. After all, you could be wrong. Just tell her that you’ve noticed some changes in her behaviour and you are concerned that her attentions could be straying. If she comes out with it and tells you the truth, you’ll have to decide if it’s worth it to you to rebuild the trust in your relationship or if you’d rather end it and be on your way. If she denies that anything untoward is happening, the decision you’ll have to make is whether to trust her and relax about it or to keep an even closer eye on her activities. Ultimately, it comes down to how trustworthy she’s shown herself to be in the past and your gut feelings about whether or not she’s telling the truth.