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 Posted: Mon Aug 31, 2009 2:03 pm
 -So, is that a good book Japan?- Hello everyone and welcome to the Reviews and Critique Thread! Now let me make some things clear about this thread and what you can do within it. This thread is were you can discuss fanfictions with others! You can say how good one is or that another might need a little work. You can also brainstorm up ideas between each other and come up with some awesome ideas. Now I know some people don't liked being flamed so don't do it! Helpful suggestions are always nice to hear, after all no one is the perfect writer. As an example: My grammar is horrible along with some of my organization. Okay next is about the critiquing, that's a special case. An author may ask for a certain piece to be looked over and have you guys to read it, for helpful suggestions on how to make it better. Like a Beta you know. But that is only and only if the author asks for such okay? Alright that's about it if I'm not mistaken. Oh and please try to remember to put the title of the story and/or the author so we have an idea on what you're talking about! Thanks guys! Now let's get writing!
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Posted: Mon Aug 31, 2009 4:36 pm
Tiffy's R e v i e w
[Of Forbidden's story] Story: Broken Glass
Forbidden, your story rocked! There's so much history, background and emotion to it! It's something I can really relate to. I can see Latvia had a really hard time trying to escape Russia's hold. Glad he did though! But the colour kinda was hard to read, you don't mind making the colour a bit darker?
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Posted: Mon Aug 31, 2009 4:41 pm
Review This way <3 I am reviewing kittify's story "Annually Unwanted"And I've gotta say the story was very good!It putted a smile on my face although I really have really no idea about the canadian provinces..But I got an impression about each province and a good laugh about the whole story!Thumbs up keep up the good work ForbiddenWord p.s.Oooo okay I'll change it to a darker blue in that case ;3
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Posted: Mon Aug 31, 2009 4:56 pm
 -Review time! Now where are my glasses?-
Hello everyone Rayna here~ Review on both Kitti's and Forbidden's fics!
Alright first thing I have to say is. Both of them are wonderful! That's why they're in the same review!
Kitti: The Provinces and Territories are so well done! I feel so sorry for Canada on having to deal with them.
Forbidden: I feel so bad for Ravis! and Russia is just so dominating and in character I'm scared!
You guys did AWESOME! -huggles- ~so what can we do today?
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Posted: Mon Aug 31, 2009 4:57 pm
Tiffy's R e v i e w
[Of Rayna's story] Story: Fairytale
This story was a very fun story to read. It would bring me back to the days when I would read thos stories of faeries and other things. There's lots of feeling to it, and I agree with Arthur, if I was picked up by a larger than life Alfred, I'd freak out. Poor guy though, getting left behind.
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Posted: Mon Aug 31, 2009 5:03 pm
I'm reviewing Rayna's story, and it's pretty good. The grammar is a little awkward at some points, but it's really good overall. I'm not sure if I understand though... sweatdrop
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Posted: Mon Aug 31, 2009 5:04 pm
R E W I E V F O R R A Y N A ' S F A R Y T A L E <3 The story was very interesting!It is one of those stories which you really can't wait to be continued because you are very curious about what is gonna happen next in the story line!The story was nice and it also made me smile a bit! ;3
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Posted: Tue Sep 01, 2009 1:42 pm
Tiffy's R e v i e w
[Of Forbidden's story] Story: Broken Glass; Chapter Two.
Again, I would love to say that you're story rocked and lots of emotions were spilling out of it, drama was really a key part of it. However, [here comes the kinda bad news D: ] the verb agreement wasn't in order. The past tense of put is put either way. English is hard, but once you get the hang of it, it gets easier! :D
Keep up the good work! :D
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Posted: Wed Sep 02, 2009 4:31 am
Mai reviews <3Rayna - Fairytale: Chapter 1
This far, simply adorable. I love fairys and other magical creatures (I seriously believe in dragons), so this story is pure love for me. It's interesting, highly entertaining and I can't wait for the next chapter. Forbidden - Broken Glass: Chapter 1 & 2Firstly, Russia scares the crap out of me. Secondly, it's all because you picture him so well. I love your descriptions of Latvia's feelings and worries. He's a character I've never really cared much about (though my interest for him is increasing), but the second chapter almost made be cry. Kitty - Annually Unwanted; Two Hundred and Thirty Three Years
I overall like the idea of personified provinces/states (If I wasn't so lazy and had enough knowledge I would probably do something with Sweden's regions), especially Canada's, and I felt that you nailed them in Annually Unwanted.
I also wanted to throw in a comment about Two Hundred and Thirty Three Years, just because I really liked it. ;D
And, yes, you do write really well.
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Posted: Wed Sep 02, 2009 2:38 pm
Tiffy's R e v i e w
[Of Rayna's story] Story: Fairytale; Chapter Two.
I've gotta say, that story will never, ever get boring. It's the type of story you have read thousands, of hundreds of times and never get bored of it. It's amazing how well you portrayed the characters. Mini Arthur and Matthew, meet giant Arthur and Matthew. Giant Arthur and Matthew, meet mini Arthur and Matthew. xD
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Posted: Wed Sep 02, 2009 2:47 pm
-Review time! Now where are my glasses?-
Hello everyone Rayna here~ –Review-
Kitti’s: On Sundays, you eat chocolate cake and Two Hundred and Thirty Three Years
Forbidden’s: Broken Glass Chapter Two Kitti’s StoriesThe first story, aww~! I wish I could eat chocolate cake every Sunday!! That was so adorable I practically melted. –haggles Matthew- The second story, another aww~ kind of the thing, its adorable and just fluffy! Woo 233 years! I thought Al was older than that? Or the reason just went over my head. Oh wait I think I got the two twins ages mixed up. Matthew is 142. No wonder I thought Alfred might be 242, ah ha my bad? I loved them both Kitti! So keep on writing! :3 Forbidden’s Story-chapter two- I-I’m gonna cry. Oh Forbidden you write this so well and it’s just amazing! I feel so bad for Latvia and the poor boy! I want to kill Russia now for being such a –censored-. I couldn’t think of a word evil so let your imaginations think of one. –huggles- You’re amazing my grammar buddy! ~so what can we do today?
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Posted: Thu Sep 03, 2009 9:02 am
ForbiddenWord's review  On
*Fairytale chapter two
*On Sundays, you eat Chocolate Cake
*Two Hundred and Thirty Three Years
*Witch craft and Wizardry
Fairytale Chapter two
OOO I feel so sorry for Matthew and Arthur...Poor things <3 Also I'm very interested in what's gonna happen next in the storyline..Will Arthur find matthew?Will they both return back to their world?Will we get to know the secret why the two fairies look exactly like matthew and arthur?Also when reading the fiction there is this lifting fluffy feeling that makes me smile a little bit ;3 Well I gotta say Thumbs up for such good work my grammar buddy rayna <3
On Sundays you eat chocolate cake
It was short but I loved it <3
Two Hundred and Thirty Three Years
Seeing Texas get some notice is making me happy over here ;3
Witch craft and Wizardry
Good old times for Arthur ;3Well keep up the good work with the fictions kittify <3
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Posted: Thu Oct 01, 2009 5:43 pm
Anna's Review ~
[reviewing Aqua] Fantastic Day to be EarlyxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxFor the love of all things sexy, I loved it to the point were I must have looked red (at some point). It just made me so surprised, not just by Francis' nature to listen on the two love birds, but how you mentioned each phase, intensifing to the part where you could develope a nose bleed imaging the scene inside of that closet. Eep!~You Will Not Be IgnoredxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxShowing the perverted side of Francis' once again, but on his own pupil from long ago? o///o
>///<
I though it was pretty good~
Though could be a bit better, though I really think your literate work is awesome!
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Posted: Mon Nov 16, 2009 8:45 pm
Kiri's Reviews~
~Diary of an Arrogant Idiot~One word. FANTASTIC. From the Germany's innocent yet accent-tinged words
to the amazing description of Prussia's insanely dirty (yet undoubtly entertaining)
room, they brought a huge smile to my face, and I couldn't help but laugh at Prussia's usual egotistical words XD.
The description was very very excellent as well! I could almost see the room...
and how much of a horror it must've been to Hungary~ (bird poop. EW. XDDD)
The ending was also so very sweet as well, and it made my heart all fuzzy... yet I could imagine Prussia's sadness.
Someone like him wouldn't be able to bring himself to say the truth that lies in his heart.
Overall, I really really enjoyed the fanfic...
I look forward to reading more, Nee!
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Posted: Tue Nov 17, 2009 7:48 am
ForbiddenWord's review On
Diary of an arrogant idiot
Sorry I'm so late in writing my review gee ;_; I said I would do it yesterday but I kinda forgot..Sorry!
I like how it started funny but ended very romantic with a little bit of angst..and I applaud because you kept Everyone soo well in character like woah...Oh and at the bird poop part I'll admit I started laughing outloud imagining the sight of Prussia's room..Good job gee!
You will not be ignored
It was a pleasure reading this fanfiction and since it had one of my favorite pairing I felt like in heaven <3 I like how aqua writes the story so detailed and sensual.The ending was especially good <3 much love to aqua for witting this!
of pictures and ATTENTION
haha I love how Romano got jealous because of Spain's turtles.That's just like him <3 And the ending was soo sweet and cute. I awwed out loud.
and he SNAPS
That was so sad ;_; I'll say truly to me this was your best work.I liked it the best because all the emotions seemed very saturated and reall and When Spain got angry that was very wow yet still you managed to keep him in character and well THis fiction is <3 The ending was cute!
o, CANADA
I like the detail in this one very much and since I like the pairing as mentioned in one of the reviews above I enjoyed reading it ;3
pero, te AMO
Oh wow A-Tsai was soo mean at the start and I really hadn't expected him to snap like that when I started reading.And I really loved how you threw the others in there:S.Italy,France and China[*huggles aqua >w< Thanks] and wrote their comments on the situation..Yayz for happy ending!
fantastic day to be EARLY
So funny XDI couldn't help but smile while reading and I loved how Spain attacked France haha ;D Lovely dear
he plays the VIOLIN
AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW So Sweet and cute!!>w< Those two just fit together perfectly!
Burried
I like this short one shot. Piku Your writting style is <3
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