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Sometimes reality decides to go on vacation. Reality is never exempt from flight delays and lost baggage. Who substitutes for Reality? That's not the point, although Particle Man applied for the job, but got into a fight with Triangle Man. (Ask the band "They Might Be Giants" about that one.)

Whenever Reality isn't around, wierd things begin to happen. In this particular story, clouds all of a sudden became triangle shaped, trees became sharpened #2 pencils and the grass was always a red and yellow plaid color.

Our humble (not really) author Spooty awoke at one time (Irrelevant!) to find himself here, and it was awfully lonely. He was awakened by the a dull thud sound and major pain in his head. From what he gathered, an iron had fallen on his head. Or he could call it irony, because the irony of it all was that he was looking for his muse, missing for the past week, when he never realized it was hiding right behind him the whole time.

No wonder everything went all strange.

Spooty gathered up his belongings and placed them in the knapsack on his back. He had with him: 1 +0 Whip of Impracticality, 1 Blue Coffee Mug, 1 Sketchbook, 1 Plush Kitty, and 1 Wooden Baseball Bat (He stole it from Ness, long story.)

It was time to set out. The first thing he saw was a rather large building shaped like half a pie, and painted like a chocolate cream one. Just the sight of it made him hungry. But would they charge him for a drink to wash it down with?

And through the washing machine Spooty went.

Please note that it was in fact a Frigidaire and was Energy Star compliant for all you conservation freaks.

On the other end was a paved room sandwiched between rows of buildings. But that was where the normalcy ended. Up on poles above the street were people suspended from wires. They all held bullhorns and shouted at various times. Phrases like "Green!" "Yellow!" "Red!" and "Hey you jackass, who taught you to drive?!" were commonly shouted, although some were more common than others.

What was even more bizarre was the fact that streetslights from reality had sprouted wire arms and legs, and white gloves and shoes adorned the odd appendages. These streetlights simply ran around, holding their arms up in the air and yelling "Quack! Quack!" all the time.

"Uhmm....She lied! I don't see milk here!" thought Spooty as he glanced at the ground only to find a rather large red button with the words "Have a nice cold glass of milk" painted on it.

It was either anticlimatic, or a hoax. The first thing Spooty thought of was....DEE DEE *cue Dexter's Lab theme*

"Ooooooooh, what does THIS button do?"

Ice cream. 3 cartons in fact. But it had nothing to do with this story, at all.

Anyway...

DREAM SEQUENCE: Some guy comes up and gives Spooty a dollar bill, he becomes overly excited and buys a Snickers bar. From there on out, strange things happen, causing him to achieve fame and fortune.

The end.

You were expecting more, weren't you?

"milk....milk...milk!" thought Spooty. No, this was not Super Milk Chan.

But the milk was gone, amazingly. Somehow Spooty found himself being poked with a stick. An oddly dressed figure was insulting him.

Somehow a bowl of ramen was floating above him. And he was still hungry. So he ate the ramen. And off in the distance, someone shouted. "THERE SHALL BE NO LOVE OF SATIN IN THIS HOUSE!"

"Nope, haven't seen it," said Spooty as he grabbed a blank sign on stake that happened to run by, and wrote "PLEASE BE ON THE LOOKOUT FOR STRAY MUSES!" on it with a marker that mysteriously appeared in his other hand.

After putting the sign in place upside down, he gathered his things and looked around. Traffic was moving normally again, if you could call it normal. Off in the distance he spotted an odd cottage with pink walls and a thatched roof.

Natural Curiousity begged him to check it out. So Spooty told Natural Curiousity to shut up for a bit, and then he turned to Aya.

"You wanna come with me then? It'd be safer to travel in numbers."

And down the street they went. Signs blared advertisements for Meow Mix and 5 rainbows criscrossed the sky above.

Soon they arrived at the odd house. Spooty knocked on the door, which somehow produced a "ding dong" sound when he knocked. The door proceeded to fall on him, and break into neat rectangles stamped with the word "Hershey".

Yes, it was a chocolate door that made a "ding dong" sound when knocked upon. But then, nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition.

After setting all the chocolate aside, and leaving a note on it that said "For a certain lvl 5000 Archer/Leader" Spooty yelled inside the house. "Potroast!?!"

Nitika: