Welcome to Gaia! ::

My so called POEMS will be here :>

any comments???

Hello There ~
Ok Overall ~ Seems Quite Nice ~
But Try Making It More Dramatic ~
Example -

I Have Something To Say
I Really Have To Tell It Today
This Maybe Sound Awkward
But This Is The Day My Heart Have Been Looking Forward

Does That Sound Ok ? But Different Persons Have Different Opinions ~
So My Advice Is ~ Do More Practice And You'll Do Good My Man ~
Keep Up The Good Work ~
You Have a Talent So Dont Waste It ~

Ah, I didn't see this. Word of advice, it's best to post in the main category. People generally don't wander into the subcategories.

Hm, well You need to work on the rhythm a bit. Read a lot of poems and try clapping or tapping a pen to the beat, you'll notice most poems have a rhythm.

like this:

(the walrus and the carpenter, by louis carroll)

The sun was shining on the sea, shining with all his might.
He did his very best to make the billows smooth and bright.
And this was very odd because it was the middle of the night.

See? it's hard to explain without saying it out loud.

Hm... there's also a lot of cliche's. things like free, thousand, true, miracle, meant to be, and give you my heart are all over used in love poems. Maybe play with metaphors, creating emotions from more unusual or different images.

I do, however, like the message. If I got this poem, it would make me happy. the cliche's make it sound a bit false- which I'm sure you don't want, but other than that, there's obvious love and care behind the words.

^_^ good job, but keep practicing!