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Trudging back through the dense forest, Killian literally stumbled right into the middle of the Elderwillow drama. It was almost high noon, and after gently inquiring about Burn and seeing that Bonfire was well, Killian had dutifully set off to Blais's usual resting spot. He didn't have much to report, he wasn't a scout after all! But he was here to tell the Protector about Wildfire's new plans to move the camp in order to mitigate the damage done during the spring Thaw, along with securing the humans a larger source of freshwater. Personally, he thought Wildfire's method was just short of genius (and only because he had been there to watch her trial and errors) so he hoped Blais would be as enthusiastic as he was!

Plus there was Burn to discuss.

The young stallion was feeling his oats, so to speak, and like his great-grandsire, grandsire and dam, Burn was exhibiting all the early signs of a soul struck by wanderlust. Killian knew it would be only a matter of time before Burn announced he was heading out to find himself, but unlike with Bonfire, Killian had no intention of falling apart this time. Sure this was his SON, but Killian now knew that home would forever be where the heart was, and like all of Burn's predecessors, he was sure to come wandering home again.

So with both good tidings and worrisome thoughts, Killian parted the last remaining bushes and tall scrub grasses, only to trip right over Blais's extended forelegs.

Whuffing out a startled whinny, Killian gathered himself and lept over the rest of the prone form, realizing as he did just who was laying there sprawled out among the long grasses. Blais had come too with a start as well, but it didn't take Killian long to take in the rest of the big stallion's appearance... and in short, he looked terrible. "You look like hell, Blais." He blurted out, snapping his jaws shut only once he realized that he had said exactly what he was thinking. "Oh.. uh..."


"What do you have to report Killian?" The big stallion asked tiredly, cutting off Killian's fumbled apology. Grimacing at the strain in the Protector's voice, Killian kept a tight rein on the rest of his speech and abrutly decided to ask about Burn and his wild tendencies later... something told him Blais needed someone to talk to even if he wasn't quite asking...

"Nothing that can't wait until you are feeling better Sir. Need an ear?" There was something to be said for honest straightforwardness after all! He'd stopped fearing his mate's father long ago, and while he'd always respect the older stallion, he'd like to think that they were friends in a way. He'd never really thought of Blais as a father figure anyway, not with Flame and Tai around, and less so as he grew older. Not even Bonfire regarded her father as Father, he was always Blais, Protector for them all... and strong.

This though.... this wasn't Blais. This creature that looked up at him with rheumy eyes and lax muscles was not the big stallion of his childhood.

"Hypothetically, what happened?"





Looking up at Killian's generous face, Blais considered dissembling for only a brief moment, before his shaky calm shattered. He shouldn't let others see him like this, aside from being bad for morale, it was hard to depend on someone for protection when they crumbled so easily. He knew well enough that there wasn't a soul in the camp that would WANT him to hide his grief, but he was the Protector for a reason, and in this he knew he was right. When times grew tough, and stress levels were high, even those he loved would remember the fall, and would worry if it would happen again when they needed him the most.

Grief unfettered was a weakness, and he'd be a fool not to admit it...

But Killian... Killian was a different sort. Never acting the part of the foolish youngling, he'd always had a gentle aristocracy about him that went well with his carefree youth. He'd always instinctively known what to say and how to say it, and now, probably without fully understanding why he was wording things the way he was, he was giving Blais the chance to say what he so desperately needed to say, only keeping his pride intact.

Blais would not weep, he couldn't, but he could unburden the heaviness in his heart.


"Hypothetically, a stallion comes upon a crossroads in life... one where there are only two choices and neither are pleasant. The first, take the right.... and go forth alone. The left, a dangerous path... one where he may not be alone, but he would still lack the one he loves the most." He started, nodding quietly as Killian lowered himself to the ground across from him. Once the flame coated younger stallion was settled, Blais went on, half surprised by how calm his tone was, and half sad.

"Duty requires he take the Right, but his heart screams to abandon Duty, and seek instead a measure of the solace a past life gave by heading Left. Anger, you see, is so much easier to bear. Forgiveness is a thing for Saints and Spirits, and such a stallion faced with those choices knows he is neither." He paused, turning away to watch a flock of passing migrating geese. Life seemed to simple when viewed through their eyes, head north or head south, follow the food source, stay out of danger...


"Hypothetically, he chooses to head right, and soon finds that a foundation he had thought indestructible was instead littered with holes and cracks. He'd never known a pain such as this before, and with a heart full of regret, he retreats further into duty... the very Duty that led him to those dangerous crossroads..." He continued, finally trailing off, though he didn't meet Killian's eyes.

When he finally did turn to look at his son by bonding, he was startled to find him staring intently at the horizon. If he didn't know him better, Blais might have thought he hadn't been listening, but Killian was not that callous... he was merely thinking.

Eventually...

"Hypothetically, I think that stallion made the right decision, since like the seasons... harsh emotions fade. The regret he feels now will be tempered by the repercussions of a job well done, and I think he would do well to fix that foundation by rebuilding it from the ground up. Memory will never let him forget what happened, but I think such a stallion would emerge stronger for what has happened, especially if he can master forgiveness and look at his reflection without shying away. " Killian said, turning to look Blais square in the eyes now. "He should grieve, and he should allow the pain of separation work through it's stages, but I do not think he should let it rule the rest of his life. Our minds eventually protect us from past traumas, so long as we are strong enough to make it through them."

With a yawn, Killian abruptly laid himself out flat with a thump, carelessly optimistic again. "But that is hypothetical, and I must say, I think I know why you like this spot so much. Sun must be great for warming old bones during the day!"

A ghostly smile twinged at the edge of the Protector's muzzle as he too lay himself back down. "Old bones indeed, it is a great way to keep feeble-blooded fools like you from bothering me. You're supposed to get sunstroke early on because of the heat and leave me alone!" He quipped, his voice carrying laughter beneath the rusty quality.

"And by the way, hypothetically... thanks."

Princess met the 'look' with a dissatisfied snort, switching her tail against her rump. So this was why Flame had forbidden her from asking Blais why he looked like s**t. Well...damnit. She couldn't deny that Cynara's defection angered her, but what could she do about it? What she wanted to do was to kick the little tart's face in, but Cynara was long gone. Blais didn't deserve to become an outlet for her anger, and...well. It looked like there might be a few more splinters in that old favorite tree of hers.

While spitting fire had never been considered for Toujour's repertoire of fanatical spoutings, he supposed it would be a neat trick, if a little ineffective when trying to convince non-believers. After all, fire was usually paired with evil and death... despite whatever Flame and his progeny said... and Toujours was all about depicting his One Lord in a favorable light.

No mental pun intended.

But on the topic of Flame's progeny and ill-luck, Toujours expression once again twisted into one of obvious distaste before answering Sandi. "Only thing giving in this situation is respect. Obviously Blais felt conflicted between his duty to his family and his duty to us, and duty to the Herd won." The dark unicorn muttered, meeting the distant Protector's fierce stare when he glanced towards them. "Despite that look right there, I'm quite sure he's chewing himself out mentally." Toujours finished, glancing over at the slimmer palomino stallion. Sandi wasn't looking at him at the moment, but TJ followed his gaze and noted with some surprise the expression on Killian's face.

"That, though, is a bit of a surprise. I hadn't known those two were that close." The black unicorn mused, momentarily oblivious to Sandi's incredulous glance.

"T, I didn't know you admitted to being surprised. I'M surprised." Sandi quipped, only to be abruptly silenced by Toujours disapproving stare. "Maybe a little less respect then I intially thought, Sandsablaze do you actually grasp what he said? His lifemate and the mother of his children just LEFT him. That would be like your hair up and deserting you." Toujours said, moving closer to Sandi so as not to have their voices carry. "You rely on it to woo the ladies and do it's part don't you? Well, Blais relied on his mate to be a bastion of sanity and love when the rest of US got on his last nerve."

Though the younger stallion's expression was still cloudy with confusion and a little resentment at being reprimanded, Toujours abruptly decided to let the matter rest. Killian looked like he was getting ready to speak.

"That would be silly Princess, she is merely doing what she thinks is best. Though I do find it ironic that the mother is straying in much the same fashion as the daughter. Though I know that my son is not as forgiving as Killian... no matter how much he loves her." The last was said with a wash of great sadness, and a great deal of irony given how long it took for father and son to at least be able to stand in each others presence.

Oh yes, Flame knew better then most how easily Blais could revert to his old vengeful ways, but given the Protector's speech, he doubted such would be his path now.

TBC