TRAINING ROOM - New RP, Strange Days, pg. 4 (OPEN)

[pumpkinlanding]

FORUM ROLEPLAY PRACTICE

EDIT: I took out Banshee's overlong intro to the thread (Oh yeah, this is Izzy, btw) because I'm starting a new Training RP, and the rules are gonna be a bit different. It's still gonna be simple, though. I'll repost the info in this post soon, so hang tight!  

[lillith the dark one]

alright.. then give a setting already.. although.. i would suggest no one be picky about my writing.. i can get extremely irritable >.>.. any ways 3nodding ya.. get a setting.. and ill join my first forum rp =]  

[Lightwater2520]

I definitely need more practice. So bring it, Banshee.  

[The Fallen Angel Anarki]

I'm not as good as I'd like to be so practice would be nice.

 

[pumpkinlanding]

A man....if you could call him that....was walking through a dense, tropical forest. The bright green leaves and brown and red barks of all the magnificent trees completely outmatched the grey of his jacket, the dark red of his shirt, the jet black of his pants whose loose tendrils seemed to writhe and twist all on their own around his feet as he walked. The pants matched the ebony of his long, smooth hair, and the pure black of his eyes.

The sound of the birds cawing in the canopy, of the crickets chirping among the lush blades of grass, the frogs singing beside the shallow creek not too far away, were the only sounds of this peaceful place, at least for the moment. This strange being made no sound; he passed silently through the forest, the unnatural pale white of his skin bathed in an eerie luminescence from the warm sunlight shining down from the small spaces in the canopy.....

((Here's a few pics of the guy....XD







And a headshot.....




Haha...I had accidentally put my thumb in the the shot on that first one. rofl ))

 

[Lightwater2520]

Will trekked through the forest. "This path is going nowhere," he said to himself. "Who knows where this thing leads."

Will was tall with short, blond hair. His brown boots were caked with mud from a nearby marsh which a stream ran through. It was in that stream that he dropped the compass, rendering it useless.  

[The Fallen Angel Anarki]

A child grinned, showing white teeth before licking his particularly sharp canines with his tongue. He stood looking around with light brown eyes. The sight was strange, completely out of place in a forest. If it was any other child, an average person would look and come to the conclusion that the child was either lost or abandoned.

But this child didn't look ordinary. His hair was normal enough, light black and a bit spiky, stopping above his shoulders. He wore a dark blue cap though, clearly too big for him as it looked like it would fall off with the slightest amount of force were it not for the fact that it was tilted with most of it resting on the child's neck, leaving the rest above his forehead. The upper part of his face was slightly shrouded by his bangs, which were probably formed by his cap, but not enough to completely cover it.

Strange jagged tattoos or symbols of some sort were on his face. The dull black markings started from both sides of his face, rising up towards his eyes a bit before descending down where it abruptly stopped near the corners of his mouth. A single line was near the top of his nose, a V-shaped symbol that was thick in the middle, thinning down as it tapered towards the sides of his nose.

The child still had a huge grin on his face, the sharp teeth gleaming in what light breached the upper canopies of the forest. He was still looking around, as if he had sensed something interesting and was now trying to find it though he never moved from his spot.

His clothes were what was strangest though. It looked to be a robe or perhaps several robes of some sort stitched together to and piled upon the child's body to form a single robe, hiding every single inch of skin from sight, leaving only his face visible as it was too large for him. The robe or robes as it were were bright colours. Bright orange, bright yellow, bright red. Every single colour that you could think of was probably in the haphazard mess that were the child's clothes, glaringly bright as if their sole purpose was to offend the eyes. It also looked uncomfortably hot but the child looked unaffected.

He also wore a long scarf which trailed on the ground beneath him, the fabric unidentifiable but was probably made of the same thing as his 'robe' though it didn't look as extreme. It was a mixture of alternating shades of reds and blues, large parts of it stitched together with black thread. His feet and hands were completely bare, hidden underneath his clothes. Still the child grinned, looking around, not moving an inch.  

[Mikey iz Beast]

He stands an even six feet on his barefeet. Long brown hair hung down to the mid of his back, a large beard set on his face. He was barechest, although this would most likely cause him to chuckle after all the scarring. Two large arcs started at his shoulders, curving down his back, and wrapping around to his waist in the front, and those were just the major ones. Many other slashes, burn marks, stab wounds covered him. And thats not even what called the most attention to him. He wore a pair of black pants, tattered and torn at the cuff, still overlapping his bare feet. An 'outcast' if you will, he was very accustom to life here in this forest. He had been here for years.

He sat with his back pressed against a trunk, his quiver and scimitar hanging from the branch above him. Sweat dripped playfully down his forehead, down his cheek, dancing along the eight metal rings that bound his lips together, and then falling gracefully to the forest floor several feet below him. He let his eyes close, a short rest needed before the night's activities. He preferred to do all of his hunting at night. And he had sensed that someone had been lurking around his forest. So, as he slept, he knew that his ears would detect anything around him. But he was still nervous. The power emitted those several feet, so large. So much energy.  

[Lightwater2520]

Will stumbled through the forest, completely and utterly lost. Every tree and rock looked the same. "Oh man, I hope it doesn't get dark before I find the trail," he thought to himself. The forest seemed to go on forever. After a while, Will realized that he had not heard any bird calls or insect noises lately. Even with the bright sunlight shining. This was very unusual. "Must be a hawk or some other predator around," he though.  

[pumpkinlanding]

The dark spectre floated along casually, glancing here and there at the beautiful scenery of the forest.....until he felt a presence nearby. He smiled - an expression mostly covered by his long ebon locks, due to the small size of his mouth - and disappeared in a puff of swirling black smoke....


Only to reappear several feet off the ground, hanging upside down by his legs from a bough of the tree under which a particular man was sleeping. His hair fell out of his face with the force of gravity and dangled below, only a few feet short of touching the forest floor. Without the jet black locks in front of his face, the small smile curving his mouth was clearly visible; a short, thin black line striking through the pure pale white of his face.

"Rather beautiful sort of day for an afternoon nap, hm?"

 

[Mikey iz Beast]

The man was not surprised to be disturbed in his slumber. Rarely did he get any rest. He was, however, a little startled that a man was hanging upside down right beside him, and yet he had not detected his presence. He opened his eyes, raising a slight eyebrow, before letting out an inaudible sigh. "Not any longer," he thought, sending a slight telepathic wave to this oddly misplaced character.He had kept his hands on his lap, the hilt of a concealed daggar within a centimeter reach. "Tell me, sir, what can I do for you?"

((If anyone is close enough to see me, then you can also hear my thoughts))  

[pumpkinlanding]

"Oh, nothing, really~" chimed his haunting, ethereal voice. "I just....saw...you nearby, and thought I'd drop in to say......."

Here he paused a moment before swinging back and forth from the tree branch, then shifting his legs to let go. This sent him into the air, where he performed a short series of flips before landing in front of the man, pale sleeve-covered arms outstretched, and a smile still on his face...although, now that his hair had fallen back over his face, it once again was not quite perceptible.

A rich aroma of apple and cinnamon, mixed with jasmine and strawberry, rose from his pale body; apparently, he loved incense. The bizarre being flicked his wrist, causing two tiny puffs of smoke to materialize around his index finger. The smoke suddenly coalesced, forming a long, fine cigarette. He popped the stick into his mouth quickly and made another movement with his hand, this time summoning a solitary flame to appear before his face. With a deep breath, he lit the stick by the magic fire, then banished it away with a wave of his hand.

"......that I'm bored and I want something to do!" he shrieked - his voice so loud it verged on ear-splitting - before sending a mass of black energy at the man. Its appearance made it seem to be an open, wild flame, and he had only held it in his hand for a second between the time he had summoned it, to the time he threw it at the man. He hoped this surly stranger was light on his feet...

 

[Mikey iz Beast]

He raised an eyebrow. This man obviously had some issues, but Mikey was still oddly intrigued by his presence. He listened in as the man spoke, almost mezmerized by his words, but he did not flinch as the man got suddenly hostile. He was used to the harsh judgement that many had thrown in his direction over the centuries.

As the dark mass flew at him, the concealed daggar revealed itself, launching from its hiding place and colliding with the fiery sphere. Mikey threw his arms up, swinging within a seconds notice to the branch above him. He snatched up his quiver and scimitar, and shot off into the forest, sliding his quiver over his shoulder, flicking the sheath off his blade. He did not want to fight, but if this man came at him again, he would not hold back.  

[pumpkinlanding]

"Aww, running away already? But the party hasn't even started yet!" he taunted, chuckling just a bit. He kicked off from the ground and began to hover upwards through the air. The incredibly long black tendrils that hung from his pants soon began swaying in a bizarre current of air caused by his power.

After a mere matter of seconds, their dance suddenly became more quick and wild, flailing rapidly through the air. He then launched himself through the air with some unseen manifestation of magic, flying toward the man with ease. If the man wanted to play cat and mouse, well, he certainly didn't have a problem baring his fangs....


((Okay, message time......

@ Lightwater: My advice for you is the same as it was before: don't be afraid of detail!

You don't have to cut things so short. I'm not saying write a five-paragraph essay about how your character feels, or what his shirt looks like, but you could do to spice up your posts a bit. For instance, instead of:

Quote:

Will trekked through the forest.

you could write something like:

Quote:

The young man trekked aimlessly through the dense foliage of the forest, glancing here and there at the lush plant life surrounding him.

or something along those lines......

I LOVE how you wrote "trekked" instead of "walked"....more vivid word usage always earns extra points in my book. ^___^

But like I said, whenever you're writing, don't be afraid to throw some spice (detail) into the pot! XD

Also, you don't have to break off and make a new paragraph after just one sentence. A paragraph is at least three to five sentences long. If you don't have that much to say, don't worry about making extra paras. HOWEVER, whenever a person begins to speak, you SHOULD begin a new paragraph. All these things make it a bit easier on the reader. ^_^


@ Anarki: I have....nothing to say....yet. *falls on floor laughing*
Excellent, as usual. TFWL wasn't the first rp you've ever joined, was it? XD
Nah but yeah, lots of detail, awesome intro. Only thing I found, was your paragraph spacing. On one of them, you typed two sentences, then switched to a new paragraph. Not that big a deal, though. Certainly not gonna cause any problems.


@ Mikey: ........Nothing to add, mon ami. Totally rad. XD

Well....You do have a few of your spelling errors in there, but as usual, not a lot. They're few and far between, and, having RP'ed with you for, what, four or five years now? I'm pretty much used to it. XD
As Tesla would say, it's gettin' better every day~


And...that's all for now, guys and gals! XD
Let's keep a-movin'. ))

 

[Mikey iz Beast]

His ears perked up at the rustling of leaves as they were pushed aside by the meer 'strength' behind the man's gliding. Mikey would have grinned at this point, only his mouth was kind of preoccupied by large metal rings and it made such things impossible. He knew that the man would not leave him be, so he decided to play along for a while, until one of them was dead. Or until he could get away.

As the branches began to clump together, he noticed he had been ascending the whole time. Now toward the top of the tree line, he decided to get on a more appropriate field of play for him. He missed a limb, purposefully, his body slipping through the dense foilage, completely disappearing from the eye of anyone. He descended, his free left hand catching limbs and flinging him lower. When he was on the lowest line of limbs, he perched for a moment, hanging upside down by his legs, flipping to the cool forest floor below him.

He now stood in a small clearing, about the size of a tavern, seeing as how there were small ashed ruins scattered across the grounds. He smiled, dropping his quiver off his shoulder, resting it against by the tree from which he entered. He stepped out into the center of the circle, and held the scimitar out to his right, the tip pointed, at an angle, toward the ground below him. "Come on then. Let us dance!"