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the_forgotten_thought Captain
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 Posted: Mon May 18, 2009 3:05 pm
whilst researching (yes, i'm still talking funny) i came across an intriguing topic and felt i should share it:
Psychological research in this area includes examining the coming out process, special challenges facing lesbian and gay youth, parental attitudes toward their children's sexual orientation, the mental health effects of being openly gay or closeted, workplace issues, discrimination and violence against lesbian and gay people, and aging issues.
Coming out: Many gay and lesbian people go through a "coming out" experience at some point in their lives. Psychologists often say this process includes several stages "in which there is an awareness of being different from peers ('sensitization'), and in which people start to question their sexual identity ('identity confusion'). Subsequently, they start to explore practically the option of being gay or lesbian and learn to deal with the stigma ('identity assumption'). In the final stage, they integrate their sexual desires into a position understanding of self ('commitment')."However, the process is not always linear and it may differ for lesbians and gay men.
Effects of coming out on the person's well-being: Various studies have found that being out improves one's well-being, that openly gay people have less anxiety and better self esteem and social support than closeted people, and that openly gay people are more satisfied in their relationships. This is attributed to the "negative health consequences of psychological inhibition" found in closeted people.
alright, i'm done being silly. kids, i want everyone reading this to understand, i'm not posting this to push you out of the closet. coming out is very important for your character development, i believe. i mean, i became a much stronger person through all my self-analysis while in the closet. the closet actually, after making you feel terrible, makes you better in the end because it gives you a better understanding of yourself and how strong you are. so please, if you aren't ready, don't make this bit of information pull you out before you're ready.
now, for topics on this thread, feel free to talk about how you felt after coming out, if you agree or disagree with this article, if you want to come out and need help (though we have tons of posts on that) or anything else you can think of regarding this.
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Posted: Mon May 18, 2009 9:06 pm
xD im like still in the final stage area.
Cuz like I know I'm definetely attracted to females more than males and I don't crush on guys or anything but I think it's still possible for me to be able to fall in love with a male.
If that makes any sense xD
But yea, coming out is confusing cuz when pplz ask you whatchya are you can't really say completely >.<
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Posted: Mon May 18, 2009 9:22 pm
*Sigh* Oi. I still don't know how to come out to my parents.
I'm scared out of my mind.
I've asked for advice before but it's never really helped. Maybe you guys can ^^; ?
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Posted: Tue May 19, 2009 3:16 pm
Tee hee Sorry ;^.^
Not my area.
Basically my plan is when I get caught making out with a future girlfriend just to tell my mom on the spot and then ask her to leave politely so I can have my privacy x3
Or if she finds out I'll just stand her yelling and go ahead do what I want with open doors so that she gets anoyed xD
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the_forgotten_thought Captain
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Posted: Tue May 19, 2009 6:30 pm
eh, you never know how to come out to your parents until you mess up and blurt it out, get caught, or... well, actually, no. that's usually how it goes, no matter how much you plan it ahead stressed
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Posted: Tue May 19, 2009 7:45 pm
That's what I figured so I've decided to live and let live sweatdrop
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Posted: Tue May 19, 2009 11:29 pm
I would love to come out, but i think I'm going to wait until high school is done with and I'm out of the house.
I already get enough crap at school, i really don't need a bunch of homophobic teenagers on my case. As for home life, I'm sure my parents would be okay, but i think they might be uncomfortable.
So yeah, that closet door is staying shut... for now!
But that's an interesting article. I kind of agreed with bits of it, kind of didn't with others.
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Posted: Tue May 19, 2009 11:31 pm
Attracting Opposites xD im like still in the final stage area. Cuz like I know I'm definetely attracted to females more than males and I don't crush on guys or anything but I think it's still possible for me to be able to fall in love with a male. If that makes any sense xD But yea, coming out is confusing cuz when pplz ask you whatchya are you can't really say completely >.< ugh i totally know what you mean! I think i've settled on bisexual, but at the same time i think i feel the same way you do.
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Posted: Wed May 20, 2009 4:46 pm
lifes4fun Attracting Opposites xD im like still in the final stage area. Cuz like I know I'm definetely attracted to females more than males and I don't crush on guys or anything but I think it's still possible for me to be able to fall in love with a male. If that makes any sense xD But yea, coming out is confusing cuz when pplz ask you whatchya are you can't really say completely >.< ugh i totally know what you mean! I think i've settled on bisexual, but at the same time i think i feel the same way you do. Yea when people ask I just say bisexual. Cuz i Hate saying bisexual but lean towards women. It sounds so fake! >.> Lol plus if mum finds out i can always pass it off as a 'phase'
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Posted: Fri May 29, 2009 9:47 am
My life is so mixed up lol I never came out at school in fear of never knowing any 'normal' people. Even after going to a predominately LGBT school. I never had to come out to my dad because he just knew. He walked in on me and a few girlfriends numerous times and we never talked about it. He would just send them home early. It was funny to me when my dad's latest girlfriend confided in me that he had told her before they started dating that he had a lesbian daughter that he loved more than anything and if they were going to date she would have to accept that. It made me want to cry. I never thought my dad cared about me much since we never really talked or had any kind of relationship. It touched me, made me feel safe. I never really feel safe just telling people I'm gay. It doesn't feel like something I should flaunt. It's a part of my life, but it's not my whole life and some people call me a coward for not being all "WOOOOO I'M A LESBIAN BET THE ******** OVER IT!!!! WOOOOO" like some people I know are. Coming out to my family was basically the same way. I didn't come out I just was dating this girl (that I'm engaged to now) and I would bring her over and I would put my arm around her and call her baby and my family just accepted it on the spot I guess. I never had a doubt in my mind that I wouldn't be. I mean, my family is religious and I am too but we don't believe homosexuality is 'sexual perversion' just rape, prostitution and lust. Love is Love and I am definitely in love with my girlfriend. I think making a big deal of coming out and the aura you put into your body reflects how people treat you about the situation. If you display yourself in a very 'matter of fact' way people tend to show you more respect.
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Posted: Fri May 29, 2009 4:21 pm
i have not come out yet as i think i am bisexual lesbian but still have not come out because i am not certain what i am
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Posted: Mon Aug 10, 2009 11:58 am
I'm positive I'm bisexual. I'm not gay, because just look at my sig. I'm not straight either, because I sometimes had sexual thoughts about other men. I'm not sure how to come out though.
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