Prolouge: Darkness
"I had a dream, which was not all a dream.
The bright sun was extinguish'd, and the stars
Did wander darkling in the eternal space,
Rayless, and pathless, and the icy earth
Swung blind and blackening in the moonless air;
Morn came and went--and came, and brought no day,
And men forgot their passions in the dread
Of this their desolation; and all hearts
Were chill'd into a selfish prayer for light"
-Lord Byron's "Darkness"
I felt darkness. My whole body was enveloped in it. The dark oblivion was terrifying yet tranquil. There was no sound and no emotion. I felt nothing. Nothing at all.
I dared not open my eyes because then this lack of pain would end. I don't know how I knew it, but I did. When my eyes opened, this would be gone. This perfect oblivion of blissfullness. I didn't know why it was so important not to be in pain-I couldn't remember what pain felt like.
As I lay there unmoving, I let my mine wander through half-forgotten memories. They were pieces missing, large gaping holes. There was even one part of my life where years were vacant. I don't know exactly how I knew it was years but it was. This spot was not mercifully blank like other holes, it was simply empty. As I prodded into the emptiness of it, I could find nothing.
I tried to trace the edges, feel out the scope of this emptiness when something sharp and piercing tore at my insides. So this was that forgotten memory...this was pain. I pushed myself away from the gaping hole, determined to let it rest and not to care.
***
I laid there for hours. I enjoyed breathing the fresh air. It tasted dewy and moist. I could smell a wonderful essence that could only be flowers. But despite the beauty that I knew surrounded me, I knew I could not open my eyes. I was safe in this merciful darkness.
Eternity passed and I was content. My eyes stayed sealed against the horrors I knew that would assault me when I again became one of the living. Yet, I knew I must join that horrid, despairing march to death.
I opened my eyes and squinted into the early morning light. It was pre-dawn, but I already knew this was no place I had ever seen before. The colors were brighter and more vivid. The flashes of memory that I had access to, appeared like a black-and-white to this place. I laid there taking in my surroundings, until with a sigh I got up.
My legs were sore. My throat was parched with thirst. Stretching my aching limbs, I looked around to find a small blue-ish egg with a feather. Walking over to it, I squatted to look at it. I was leary in case the mother was around, but it appeared just as alone in this world as I did.
Picking up the egg, I tapped it softly. Much to my surprise it tapped back at me. Tucking it under my arm, I walked on looking for water. I wasn't quite sure why I was carrying it with me. I had no intention of eating it but I didnt' even know if I could take care of myself let alone it. Whatever IT was.
As I walked further, my legs finally lost some of their cramped feeling. The air was warm and it felt good, for now, to be among the living. Finally, I stumbled upon a small stream. Kneeling down I cautiously drank from the water. It was fresh and cool. The water appeared untainted and clear. This allowed me to see that in most places it wasn't that deep.
Removing my shoes, I placed my feet in the water and bathed the grit and dirt from them so that I could refresh myself before continuing to search. After a few minutes rest, I decided to walk downriver. I reasoned that I could at least survive longer if I had water as opposed to losing this precious source.
As I walked the sun rose higher in the sky, but the heat didn't seem to increase too much. I was comfortable in my attire. Then, I realized that there was a forest in the distance and that it was coming to run alongside the stream. Staying to the stream, I finally found myself in a small valley filled with forest. On the edge of this dense forest there was a cabin ideally situated. The stream continued on and made small lake behind the cabin before continuing further on and losing itself under ground.
Bracing myself up, I walked to the door with the egg still tucked beneath my hand and knocked.
