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 Posted: Tue Mar 24, 2009 8:32 am
  Life just wasn't fair. Even more was the fact that learning that lesson always had to be the hard way. Someone couldn't just say that to you, you had to experience it for yourself.
Usually when someone got hurt, they would mope around for a few days, maybe even a little bit more than normal (depending on the amount of pain), talk to their friends and family and then get over it. The pain would subside but the memories were always hanging on the shoulders....haunting. But this....this was a different story. The old, dried out stallion was crushed. The world around him seemed to be caving in, and swirling around and it just wouldn't stop. Every day that passed made it worse than the one before, because it just meant another day alone...
You see, Bairn's mate left him one afternoon, without even a goodbye. He was out on an adventure to find their children and when he came back, she was gone. He waited by their resting spot for days, and days quickly turned to weeks...and still no sign of the mare he fell for. At first the stallion found himself in the denial stage, and with the birth of his second batch of grandchildren....his youngest, Tiramisu, she helped him get passed it. She would spend hours on end with her grandfather, and they would just talk. At first the talk was about his former mate, and now it was about everything. The young mare could approach him without worrying about setting him off.
Bairn was just upset. He was over the fact that she left him, but he wanted to know why. Wasn't she the one who told him that she wanted him to go find the children? Wasn't she the one who pushed this relationship on him in the first place? Way back when they were young, wasn't she the one who fell in love with him, even though he protested her love? She was the one who hung on until he gave in and loved her back. So what happened? Surely she realized that this...decision she made caused him pain...so why did she do it? Didn't she have enough class to at least say goodbye for one final time? The stallion was at a loss for reasons, except one. This family thing that 'accidentally' happened wasn't what she wanted in life, and she couldn't do it anymore. Kiefer, Abattie and Tahlia came randomly one day, without either of them wanting it. Bairn took the news as utter amazement. He couldn't be happier, he was going to be a father! His father would be proud of him, for growing up past the grumpy 'life sucks' stallion than he once was. But his mate....she was torn apart. She thought she was too young to start a family, too young to raise foals just the two of them. Perhaps she was right, perhaps she WAS to young, and not just age...but emotionally and mentally. But whatever the reason, Bairn always thought they did a fine job. Sure Tahlia disappeared all together, Kiefer had two sets of b*****d children and Abattie was a stallion-chasing emotional wreck, but they loved their parents greatly. That was what mattered. Family relations.
The day was warmer than most, and it brightened up the washed out stallion's mood, for even just a second. At least something in this world was right for once. The weather. Bairn stood by a watering whole, staring at his reflection in the melting ice with an expression that read utter unhappiness. But the break up wasn't the thing that bothered him anymore...it was the simple fact that he was getting upset again, and he promised himself he never would. There was a stage, way back then, when he lashed out at anyone who tried to be nice to him, because he honestly believed that life was pointless. He was a walking depression drug, and he couldn't get out of it. And he hated who he was. When his mate came along and dragged him out of that stage, Bairn couldn't be happier. He found a reason to live....and now, well...he was heading toward that stage that he promised never to revisit. Maybe not as strong as before (because now at least he had kids who depended on him) but he was still in that direction.
And for what? Because he was alone? That was a pathetic excuse, and couldn't even believe he was thinking it. Being alone isn't that big of a deal....so why was it bothering him now?
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Posted: Tue Mar 24, 2009 3:24 pm
Once again, she found herself traveling. Her heart was in good spirits, and her head held high, but she did not seem happy. Rather, Corine looked rather apathetic in the nice weather. This was not her intention when she left her brother after their meeting. She had wanted to look happy and hopeful afterward.
And then... she started weighing the options of looking like this. She found that looking happy might give people the wrong impression of her, but looking sad was the right emotion either. Back and forth, back and forth she went, until the mare snorted loudly and just decided on looking like she always did: rather apathetic and detached.
It was with this face she walked to a watering hole and bent to drink. The mare noticed the brown stallion and froze for a moment, just staring. Corine shook her head and dipped it to drink.
He looks so sad.... Should I ask what is wrong and try to help? He might ignore me or yell. Then again, he might not and want the help, though in the long run maybe asking isn't such a good idea cause he could start crying (or maybe not given his gender) or blow up, then again... she thought, the debate raging in her head.
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Posted: Sat Mar 28, 2009 12:19 pm
Whatever was the deep rooted problem, there was a need to get out of it. Bairn couldn't let himself fall so hard like last time, he couldn't stand to see his family ripped apart like last time. Besides, moping was for foolish young soquili who weren't knowledgeable. He was younger then, and his sisters didn't have a huge family either. His sisters were there to help him, to make sure he didn't fall even further. But now both Artemis and Aruna were off far and away with great-grandchildren of their own, which Bairn was only a Grandfather....thank goodness.
But now he had his youngest sister, Epesi. And his two younger brothers. But the stallion never saw either of them, he had a life way before they were born. They didn't know him, they couldn't help him smile again. He needed something different....
That's when he noticed her, the young mare standing there and staring at him. Did she want something? Or was she amused to see an aging, old washed up stallion like himself look unhappy? He lifted his head in her direction, boy was she a young one. Ugh, young mares....they were so foolish, so very very foolish. Young mares got knocked up by stallions and it ruined their lives.
Astia was a young mare before their children....
"Can I help you?" He snapped, staring right back at her. Was she ever taught that staring can be rude? "Or do you just not care to leave others to their own business?"
Bairn turned his head from the young white mare, somewhat annoyed that she hadn't even bothered to say hello. What, was she afraid of him? Did he look that stand-offish? Ah well, suppose that came with the territory, he DID give off an uneasy aura.
"I'm sorry miss, I didn't mean to snap. I'm just not feeling myself lately, but it's not something I should muse over too long." He smiled at her then, doing his best to sound sincere. He was a good guy, beneath the crazy. "Enjoying your day so far miss?"
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Posted: Sat Mar 28, 2009 5:07 pm
Corine blinked and frowned. What the? It wasn't like she'd done anything wrong. Okay, yes, she'd stared at him, but that wasn't the point! Or was it? Maybe it was. Maybe she should have said hello or some--- SHUT UP! she yelled at herself. Now is not the time. She lifted her head up and her face was apathetic.
"If you are wondering why I was staring, it was because I had just noticed you, and you looked sad to me. I was merely getting a drink, sir. But, in any case, I am enjoying my day, thank you," she said, being as impartial as she could with annoyance bubbling in her veins. She could deal with it later, right now was not the time dwell on such things.
The mare gave him a slight nod, and smiled in return. It was, of course, the appropriate response. She noticed that he was an older stallion, not so much graying about the muzzle, but wisened nonetheless. Or maybe that wasn't the right word... Old was far to harsh, but he wasn't exactly a spring buck either.
And once again, Corine began to debate the choices present. Her eyes seemed to glaze over. Oh dear...
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Posted: Sat Mar 28, 2009 7:25 pm
Bairn honestly hadn't meant to snap at her. He wasn't rude unless the soquili in question deserved to be treated as such. And this mare, well, he didn't even know her name. Normally he was just a normal guy, not really ready to judge. Until he got to know the character, he'd be polite.
She just caught him off guard. Perhaps he didn't realize that anyone would want to stare at him, or maybe he was making a sense in his current state of mind? Whatever the reason this mare probably had a good one. Bairn continued to smile at her, before he heard her speak.
"You're welcome miss. And it's quite alright, I apologize for over-reacting. I suppose I deserved the staring then, wasn't I staring at myself?" He chuckled a bit, looking from her to the water and then back to her. It had been....oh, far FAR too long since he'd seen another being outside his family. It was nice to have a conversation, although this one started horribly. Hopefully this mare would give him the benefit of the doubt and talk. Hopefully she wouldn't be turned off and run away. Bairn didn't want to be alone, for once in his life, he wanted company.
No, he didn't want it, he NEEDED it. But he'd never admit it.
"Thanks good to hear! My day is starting off better than most as well! My name is Bairn by the way, miss. Yours?"
This mare seemed young, but not just in age but also in experience. The old stallion just could tell she hadn't felt or witnessed much of too excitement. That was though in a way, a good thing. It was better to be ignorant of the truth then go along thinking everything was okay until it blew up in your face.
He noticed after a few minutes that she seemed off. Maybe something was going on in her mind, like something was in his? Maybe she wasn't so ignorant as he thought, maybe he was just stereotyping. "Um, miss I apologize but is something the matter?"
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Posted: Sat Mar 28, 2009 8:05 pm
"Uh... What? Oh..." said Corine, blinking and shaking her head. Her white cheeks flushed pink and she looked down. "I apologize, Bairn, was it? I tend to... be as impartial in choices as I can and I argue almost every point on every side, which tends to lead me to ramble on and on and get rather glassy eyed, and I don't even know it sometimes, and--- I am Corine, by the way," she said, in just about four breaths. She cut off her ramblings, knowing she probably sounded like a little foal.
Young she was yes, but no so young to be mistaken for a foal (her size nonwithstanding). The fact that she endured her mother leaving her poor father solidified that. She just wasn't that good with others, communication wise and just in general.
Corine took a breath. "Once again. I apologize. I get a little... into myself sometimes. My herd mate, Duskai, usually kicks me when I start rambling out loud. Though... that only works when she's around," she said, allowing herself a bit of a chuckle. "It is a pleasure to meet you, Bairn."
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Posted: Sun Mar 29, 2009 9:57 am
Aha! She blushed! It was easily noticed on her coat by any simple eye, but Bairn could tell regardless. Mares blushed, they blushed a lot. And when they blushed they looked down, or away or anywhere but directly at the soquili that caused them to blush. It was common knowledge, but still nice to see that HE had been the reason this mare's cheeked flushed a different shade.
"Well I see what you mean about your rambling problem, but honestly Corine you do not need to apologize for acting that way. In fact, please never tell anyone you're sorry ever again. Especially not to someone more vicious than I. It shows weakness if you apologize for something you cannot control. It lets others take advantage of you." His voice sounded stern, and he spoke slowly...catching only half of her ramble. Did she think that it was the problem, the way she acted? Did she think that people might dislike her for it? Sure everyone had issues, but that was the thing. EVERYONE had issues.
If everyone went around apologizing for their issues, boy the world would get annoying. Not only would Bairn have to deal with the issue itself, but now he'd have to hear, SORRY SORRY SORRY! every five seconds. It was bad enough, having to hear bubbling laughter come from silly stupid mares.....
Bairn snapped back into reality as quickly as it could hoping it didn't seem obvious that he drifted off. "Don't. And kicking? How does kicking help I don't understand." He blinked, pain does not help one's issues it only makes it worse. But he grinned at her anyways, accepting the joke.
He didn't want to ruin this encounter right away and cause her to flee. He wanted at least, if nothing else, a few more minutes of conversation. "Nah, the pleasure is all mine, Corine! What brings you out here alone on a fancy day like this?"
Remember, be polite. Polite. Don't be rude. Be polite. Being snarky is how you got hurt the first time. Being polite lets others get to know you....
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Posted: Sun Mar 29, 2009 10:33 am
Corine blinked, the blush instintely fading from her cheeks. Was he bipolar or something? He really seemed to like to switch from snapping at her and being nice. Such an odd stallion, Bairn was. He was not like her brother at all, or her father for that matter.
Then again... she'd only known those two stallions, so she couldn't really compare. "The kicking diverts my attention. And makes me realize I've been rambling. As for apologizing, sometimes you have to do it. So, what, if you run into another mare and collide with her, you don't say your sorry? That doesn't make much sense to me, and I can't even begin to see the sides of that argument," she said, a small piece of her true self showing through. Corine, to her brother and Dusk at least, could be rather judgemental when she wanted to be. She could make decisions with a flick of an ear, and say just about whatever she wanted to. With others, not so much. She liked to stay quiet and discuss outcomes with herself.
There was something about talking to Bairn that just made the judgemental side nicker in happiness and want out. "So no, I will not stop apologizing because sometimes it is necessary to keep friendships and relationships and to be viewed as an all around nice person," she said, refraning from huffing. She was not the type of mare who would get annoyed at every little thing. Corine just did not agree with his statement.
"On a lighter note," she said, smiling, "I'm not sure, really. I left my brother some days ago and have just been walking. How about you? You look like the type of guy who'd have a family to care for, unless you are one of those 'players' who try to get with any and every mare they can."
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Posted: Fri May 08, 2009 9:13 am
One could say Bairn was bipolar, at least he made himself seem that way. He definitely was in a sense when he was younger. Going from a calm, happy foal to a hard-heart type of stallion, to falling in love and being fun, back to miserable. It was although hi s life was a roller coaster and it never slowed down or stopped.
And he was well aware of this, but he couldn't help it. Or maybe he just didn't care to? Bairn, underneath all the heavy exterior was a great guy, he just needed to be pushed a tiny bit to get a head start. Right now no one was worth his time.
"So you hurt yourself to get yourself to stop talking?" He blinked...pain? She'd rather have someone invert pain to herself then talk? He'd rather hear her talk his ear off then hurt herself it just sounded ridiculous. "Ah, to each their own I suppose topic is dropped." He didn't want to get into it with her, his mind streaming with insults and snarky comments. "Well I didn't mean it like that, if I collide with a mare I'll apologize for not paying attention but I won't apologize for the actual collision....part of it would be her fault too."
He smiled a bit, recognizing where she was coming from, but again he really wasn't in the mood to pursue an argument. Perhaps if the mare was disgusting, or if she was really a he Bairn would be up for a fight, but not with this one.
"Then fine, no snot off my nose. I just don't want to see a Kalona taking advantage of a young, gorgeous mare such as yourself when you 'apologize' for doing something. I'm not saying start being a jerk to everyone you meet, I'm just saying watch what you apologize for. If you apologize for existing, like I once did, it doesn't make life every fun."
He liked the feisty side he was beginning to see come from Corine, it intrigued him. If she believed in something she sure stood her ground pretty damn well, it was a refreshing sight and she proved that she wouldn't apologize for everything she did. If she was weak she'd say, 'oh sorry Bairn I didn't mean to apologize'. Saying you're sorry for saying you're sorry....ugh that was the most annoying apology.
"Walking is good, helps clear your mind." He gave her a slanted look, amused by her accusation. "Well, I have a family...kids at least. No mate, my former one left me and took my youngest daughter with her. So I've got two children really...both way old and way gone...and psh." He laughed out loud, almost mockingly. "Me? Please! I'm old, I'm worn down, I'm a pathetic excuse for a single stallion. I'm well aware of the fact that I've gone out of style, that mares are looking for hip and young now'a'days. I'm far from a player, missy. Far from. So what about you then, if we're going to start the accusations?"
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Posted: Fri May 08, 2009 7:07 pm
Corine listened her head tilting to one side when he said he had kids. Bairn was quite different from her brother and family. She enjoyed this change of pace. When asked about her, she blushed a little.
"I don't have anyone. Actually, the only two stallions I know are my father and brother. I am sorry about your mate, though she sounds a lot like my mother. Who is someone I will never be, a flighty mare with no regard for what she has.." she said, her grey eyes hard with anger. That was the one thing she hated so much about her mother, how she'd left her father without such as a backwards glance. It made her blood boil and reinforced her position.
"I would never do that to someone... leave them with baskets. It is not something I'll ever let myself do."
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Posted: Fri Jun 05, 2009 8:28 am
The topic of family was never one of the tan stallion's favorites. Even when he was young and in his prime...he still wasn't keen on mentioning his sisters or parents. When the thought of 'family' came around, the only things associated with it was pain. Heartache. Disappointment. Back then he had a pathetic reason, back then it didn't really compare to the pain, heartache and disappointment that he went through now. Family. What does that even mean? Creatures you gave birth to, or gave birth to you. That was all.
But the stallion managed a smile back at the mare, family if anything....was a brother and a father. If Aruna or Artemis had no children, no mate, no mother even...they'd have Bairn and their father. Always. "I'll bet your father and brother are very protective of you. And at least your mother left you with the gift of knowing how to not act." He watched the sudden change in the young mare with a sad aura. Well...at least he wasn't the only one going through pain?
"You cannot say that for sure, though Corine. I'm not saying I don't believe you and you're going to get pregnant and then abandon your children, but those moments when it happens...when those baskets are there and you're not ready for them....something snaps inside you. I watched it happen in my mate, I ignored it. She didn't leave right away, she waited until her children were grown and gone...but I told her I wanted more and it scared her."
The stallion inched closer to the mare, knowing he had to choose his words carefully, he wasn't exactly helping the situation by being negative. "All I'm saying is, be ready."
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Posted: Sat Jun 06, 2009 10:02 am
Corine looked at Bairn for a moment. She tried to decided whether she liked what he said or not, and couldn't. The only thing that came to mind was that he was right, that she should - and would - be ready when baskets came. She also came to realize that, for all his stubbornness and being alone, he was quite a nice stallion. He was far different from her family, but he had the air of being able to stand up to Gaspard if she brought Bairn to him.
Bringing Bairn to her brother and father would mean one of two things: one, the stallion had gotten her with foal, or two, that they were mated, or at least thinking about it.
Mated...
Corine's mind, on a rare one train of thought, went haywire with a picture of her and Bairn mated, and with children. On the outside, her eyes, slightly wide, glazed over and a blush spread itself over her cheeks and down her neck some. She just couldn't tear herself away from the picture she created, and she didn't know why.
With a forceful stamp of her hoof, and a frown of concentration, she shook her head, trying to clear her head.
"Whoops..." she muttered, giving the brown stallion a sheepish grin of embarrassment.
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Posted: Wed Jul 08, 2009 11:34 am
A similar thought passed through the stallion's head as he stood there, watching the mare practically look like she just left reality. As the blush appeared and as he wondered what thought could cause such an intense blush, he began to think.
He liked her. Not love, hardly not even like LIKE...because he wasn't some dumb young stallion who just wanted to get laid so love was the word he used. No, Corine was pretty, she was young, she was smart....she was interesting. He liked her. He had no idea how old she was compared to his own children, but perhaps he'd take her to meet them? Meet the only soquili in the world besides his siblings and parents who he loved more than anything. She could meet Kiefer, who would likely hit on her, like he always did....and Attie, who would probably ask if she was replacing their mother as his mate.
Eh, wait what? Oh dear. Maybe taking her to see his children wasn't such a good idea, at least not yet. They'd have to get to know each other better first and then he'd dive into the embarrassing conversation of 'no we're just friends...'. That never really was pleasant but luckily he never had to go through that.
A few seconds after that thought passed by, Bairn himself regained control and he looked at the mare, who was grinning at him and he did the same in return. "Well now, what were we saying?"
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Posted: Wed Jul 08, 2009 4:57 pm
Corine chuckled and her tail flicked. "Honestly, I have no idea. I am slightly curious about something though..." she said, her grey eyes soft and bright. "What's your family like? Your siblings, your children. I've always been with my father and my mother, till she left, then Gaspard, and then with Duskai. I don't know much about other families, for Dusk never speaks of hers." The mare thought about that for a moment, before asking, rather hastily, "If you don't mind me askin. Sometimes my mouth gets way from my head and I just start speaking... and I'm just gonna stop now. He he..."
Jeez... she really needed to get a hold of her mouth. These stupid rambling sessions were sure to run the boy off after awhile. Heck, it was bound to run anyone off after a while.
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Posted: Wed Jul 08, 2009 6:53 pm
If there was anything in the world he loved to talk about, it was his sisters. Bairn wasn't too familiar with his two younger brothers so they weren't necessarily always fun, but his sisters....boy did he feel proud to call them that. Aruna, his older one and Artemis, his younger....as well as Epesi, his youngest. But Aruna and Artemis, the sisters that grew up with him, the sisters that he knew better than himself. The two of them were absolutely perfect.
Perfect daughters, perfect sisters, perfect mates, mothers and friends. Just....perfect. "I have five siblings, two younger brothers, two younger sisters and an older sister. My brothers and I are not close, but my sisters are wonderful. Their names are Aruna, Artemis and Epesi. They've all got strong, independent heads on their shoulders and would do anything to fight for those they love. Artemis is mated to a Kalona so her children are probably hard to deal with, but she's the kindest creature I've ever met. Aruna is mated to my enemy, and her children are probably even harder to deal with but she's a feisty little one. She's....brilliant. My best friend. Epesi....she is my mother reincarnated. She's funny, talkative, lovable...."
Bairn paused for a moment and smiled at her. Corine seemed uneasy to bring up the subject, but he had not a problem with it. "Most don't speak of their family it can be a touchy subject even someone's past. But it's fine, I love my sisters. They are my world. As for my children, Kiefer, Abattie and Tahlia. Unfortunately...Tahlia ran off with her mother so I don't know the mare she grew to be, but she was always shy, quiet....Kiefer was the player, the lover-boy. Two sets of unplanned, unwanted kids...Abattie's my confused, desperate-to-fall-in-love, star-struck kiddo...my baby."
Daddy's little girl....
Was growing up. Where did Attie run off to? Probably chasing stallions, no doubt....
"But hey, I don't mean to brag. They're just family." He chuckled, giving her a look. Now it was his turn to shut his mouth. Probably making her run to the hills, with the way he talked about his sisters...
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