((AIM log between Kim and DFA))
He moved swiftly across the sand - or as swiftly as his little legs could take him. Rowtag was growing, just as his siblings were, but he was still small and sometimes he forgot that. Probably came with trying to act grown-up before his time. But he wasn't the only one. There were other cubs, too, that had to leave behind their childhood early - not all, but certainly some.
The red and black male with the white mask marking that enveloped blue eyes was now heading home after a long day.
He'd been off training - teaching himself how to stalk and pounce - by using a poor lizard that he'd forced from its home. Now he was dirty and tired and really wanted to curl up and be left alone. But with so many other siblings, that was very unlikely. Even still, home was a comfort, and he liked being there after a long day, if only to unwind and listen to the others talk.
He pulled himself up towards the den and paused to listen. Was anyone home?
--
Amusingly enough (taking into account what a large family they had), the den was mostly empty. The only ones inside were Kenna herself and Serafina, whom was curled up against her mother, deep in sleep. The queen had become enlightened by Finar si's words and was content with spending her last few days in idle thought, pondering out what she was going to carry out once she arrived in Simo.
She's already told the pride of her encounter, and though most believed her and would be joining her, she was sure a handful were upset and had bare their teeth secretly at her. She was not fussed over the idea though; let them growl, she though as she snorted, for they were simply stupid and not meant to be Firekin then.
Her eyes, red like blood, slipped towards the entrance as she heard a sound, "Rowtag," she murmured her child's name as she shifted to watch him, mindful of the sleeping girl at her side.
--
Rowtag was perhaps one of those who didn't understand what was going on. No, he knew what was going on. It was over. The Safi were no more. They had been cast into the void and left to stumble around on their own, finding their way in the dark. Some of these lions had perhaps never left the desert and if they had, they had had no love of the outside world. Now they had no choice.
No, there was a choice.
They could go to the Simo.
Go the the Simo!?!? Yeah, if they had a death wish or if they had no pride at all. Rowtag, sadly, was one of the lions who didn't want to go, but he had loyalty to his family and at the moment his loyalty to them was stronger than his hate of the Simo. Besides, if something went wrong, he wanted to be there to help.
His ears lifted at his mother's voice and he moved towards the den, head hung inline with his shoulders. "Mother." He replied, his eyes flicking down to observe his sister. Asleep, was she?
"Where is everyone else?" He asked, not seeming to really engage in conversation but making a lame attempt anyway.
--
Her eyes flickered briefly to check on Serafina, but her breathing was still long and deep, indicating sleep. Shifting once more, she made motion for the male to approach; in all honesty, his being dirty from his training was setting off her OCD and the urge to clean him was overwhelming her.
"Your father took Keahi out to sparr," though in all honesty, Ji just wanted to spend some time with the cub and play, "I think two of your sisters went out to train together, and I don't know where the rest are. They'll be back sooner or later," Most likely, most of them were busy giving the goodbyes to the territory that had been theirs since they'd been born.
This wasn't their rightful place though. Kenna knew that. She hadn't been born here; their land lay with the Simo, and oh, she planned on getting it back, "You seem upset. Something's eatting you," it was not even a question, but a statement.
--
His eyes diverted from her face. Dammit. How could she do that? How could mothers just know everything about their children? She'd read his unease as if it were printed to his face, and she probably knew what was getting at him, too. Was there any point trying to pretend everything was okay in world-Rowtag?
No. Not really. She already knew.
"How do you know the Simo aren't going to kill us on sight, Mother?" Blunt and to the point. That was Rowtag all round and this was the thing that worried him the most. It made him feel small and hopeless and there were so many to protect...so many cubs who couldn't defend themselves if the worst happened. He hated feeling that way.
--
She was glad he was blunt, in all honesty, because that's how Kenna herself was. It never paid to beat around the bush, in her opinion. The more time spent skirting a topic, the more time the problem had to grow, "I don't," she replied back bluntly, though there was not a hint of fear in her voice, "That is why I'm going ahead before the main group. If I don't come back, it'll be a sure sign that I was killed, and thus, that it's not a good idea to approach them."
She had, after all thought about the technical difficulties. Something told her though, that if she went ahead of the group, alone, they might have a chance. Not only that, but she was sure the Simo would rather have her where they could keep an eye on her; they would let them pass and stay. If only because she knew the leaders there were not nearly as bloodthirsty as other Firekin had been. She could remember them, if only barely, and Ripuka had spoken about them before.
"Nothing is ever for sure. That doesn't mean we shoulroll over on our stomachs and simply accept that fate though."
--
Rowtag growled quietly. He didn't like that plan. Mother going off ahead of the others, alone. No, he didn't like that at all. "Father should go with you, just in case it does go wrong." It made him feel awkward saying it, knowing he couldn't protect her, knowing that he might lose her. He thought of Rap and his anger and grief at having lost his mother, Ripuka.
He didn't want that life.
He sighed and sat, feeling even more uncomfortable than before. "We shouldn't trust them, Mother. We can't. I can't." He blinked. "Maybe we should go with the others. Maybe we should leave the desert behind. It might not be all that bad...out there." But he didn't really believe that, either.
--
"If it goes wrong, the two us alone can not posibly over power them, Rowtag," her eyes narrowed in thought, "And I would need your father to take care of you all, and teach you what there needs to be taught," her arm stretched out and bring the cub (for he WAS still a cub, despite what he thought of himself) near her body, her tongue passing over his pelt to rid of the dirt he'd acumulated.
"Maybe we shouldn't," she drawled, "But I trust in Finar si and her will. It has little to do with the Rebels, and a lot with doing what we should, as Firekin," she finished grooming him, but allowed herself to keep him near her, "What is a Firekin outside of the desert but merely Mundane? We belong here. Even those that are leaving know that."
--
He opened his mouth to argue, to tell her that he didn't want her going off to face the danger alone. He would go with her instead and protect her with all the strength he could muster. Maybe, if they saw she was a mother, they wouldn't harm her. But he couldn't bring himself to say it and the strange prickling sensation at the backs of his eyes halted anything else he might have said or done.
Then she was pulling him close and he, reluctantly allowed it. Perhaps even cherished it. This closeness. Meeting Rap - though the boys didn't get on - had made him aware that he shouldn't take things for granted, especially not his parents. He glanced up at her as she spoke again, knowing that he didn't trust anyone but his family. Not even Finar-Si.
"Mother...how do you know we can trust Finar-Si?" He shook his head. He didn't want to leave the desert either. But the truth was that he was afraid.
--
"Because... it is who we are," she told him, "She made us whom we are; we can not change that," she had been taught since youth that there were few things she could hold on, however, faith was one of them. Both 'Mwali' and her mother had been adamant in teaching their children that; it was all for the good of the Firekin! The good of the Great goddess!
"Trust is difficult," she sneered at the word itself, "And not something you should give easily, but at times, there's no other way," her eyes narrowed down, "They are our brethen - sibblings, even if they have strayed from the right path, betrayed their ways. It is out job to correct this, or die trying. We can not stay here."
--
He gave a little huff and allowed himself to huddle closer, pressing himself against her fur. He didn't trust Simo, he didn't trust Rap or his family. Nor did he trust Finar-Si. He wasn't sure why. After all, she was their Goddess. And yet there was so much that Rowtag did not trust about her. When it came down to it, there were only a few people he could trust.
"I trust you, Mother." He murmered softly. "You and Father."
He sighed deeply and glanced towards his sister, sleeping. Perhaps he should join her. They'd need their strength for the ordeal ahead. And it was going to be an ordeal - for him, at least. "We'll be okay..." He continued softly. "I'm going to sleep now whilst it's still quiet."
--
"That's good," she murmured, and cuddled both cubs together, closer, so that the shared warmth would be more comfortable for them all, "That's all you need to trust in, for now," her head lowered down to partially cover both cubs from view, her eyes narrowed in the dim light.
They would be alright. If anything, because he had someone (in fact, over 10 someones) to live for, and she wasn't yet prepared to let go.
