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Day in and day out everything was the same. A white padded room where he couldn't hurt himself, techs that really didn't care and only brought him things for him to live and to change his bandages. Everything about him was shaddered or at least mentally it was. No one came to visit him not even his mother in which she couldn't handle what had happend and what he his now. He did have a sane moment when some one like him came and visited him and was nice as well. But now Ciaran's mind had slipped back into insanity and not really remembering the visit.

Singing a very random song loudly and if you listend to the words carefully the song was some childhood songs that were all being sung at the same time and mixed up. Laying on his back as he sang, Ciaran had his feet in the air trying to catch his tail that was swaying back and forth in the air. As that was one of his only forms of intertanment he had.

The singing stopped as Ciaran heard his name being called and looked around the room to see who it might be and seeing no one there he got up off the floor in one fluid motion with the practice of one that didn't have the use of there hands or arms. He knew he heard that voice before, but couldn't place it but deep in his mind was screaming to him that it was his friend but it wasn't being heard as that part was disconected. He wandered around the room in a gerky type of motions as it looked like he was drunk. After figureing out that there wasn't anyone in the room he looked towards the door and seeing Luthor there but the look in his eyes that they were hallow and that there was nothing there.

"Yes?" he answered as his head cocked to one side. "Are you a shaddered lost...lost in the sea of a shaddered world?" he anwered "Or to bring pain to one that is a shadow of that that once was unshaddered?" he asked with his tail feathers spreading in and out and with his tail weaving back and forth. The door to Ciarans room was onced locked until his last visitor had broken it and could be opened. As the tech weren't going to fix as he really had left it or knew that he could leave.

Now knowing that the voice was comming from someone on the other side of the door. Weaving his head back and forth has he tryed to figure out were he had heard that name and to why it was so fammilar. His arms moved within his restrances. At least he had figured out that Luthor wasn't a tech and wasn't going to hurt him.

"Lots of things happed...A shaddered world with shaddered dreams...Panic from lost love...the beauty of red and a room of white and pain." he answered. "This room very much a prison for a shaddered one of a shadow. So very easly forgotten.." he said as he started to twirll around and around the room as to motion the room he was talking about. "So very lost with the shaddered worlds sea" as he had a smile on his face and it was sorta creepy in a way as he even look that he himself wasn't all there.

He stoped moving around when Luthor came closer but his tail not really stopping as it was moving around at is own beat. He kept looking at Luthor as Ciaran still knew he knew the other, but was different from before. Hearing the soothing voice was now his own eyes half closed and was relaxed somewhat. If he could he would be banging his head with his hands to try to help him remember. But it was the petting of his hair that he when a little stiff and eyes when wide. Then totally relaxed and sank to the floor as he rememeber who Luthor was.

"Luthor...lots of scary things has happened and I don't how long I will stay sane," he said as he was sitting on the floor leaning into Luthor now. As for the whole time he was hear all he truly wanted now was confort from those he loved.

Closeing his eyes as Luthor snuggled him, this was something he need to ground is mind into reality. For what seamed to him like a long time the feeling of being abanded for he thought there would be no hope of ever seeing the light. "Ok," he said meekly "Everyone else has abanded me here to my fate, broken and unable to see clearly the broken pieces.."

Ciaran gave a chuckle his first one in some time. "I do. The techs put it on me when I came here from hurting others, but it was mostly from hurting myself." he said not wanting Luthor to let go, but winced a little "But please don't hug too hard as my wrists till hurt alot." he said as the tech might be takeing care the he wouldn't get infections from his wounds but they did nothing for the pain and the strait jacket didn't help.

So many things thought on a shaddered world, that is slowly starting to repair itself. Suddly started to sinking back in to insanity as he thought of those who put him here. "They did start the shattering of the world...telling me things that I would never have..." He barried his head more into Luthor trying to keep his sanity. "Thank you, I just don't want to be abandoned like my mother did...thrown out like a broken toy." His tail started to weave back and forth a sign of him slowly heading back into insanity.

Hearing 'the techs' in a sharp manor from Luthor did snap him back to reality or at least as much as he was before. "They are..." He looked at Luthor sheepishly as he now knew what he had done wasn't the best thing to have done, but when ones mind insane really dosen't think of the consaquences of there actions. "But it wasn't silly at all," he said trying say to Luthor on what he did was hard. "I did, before comming here. When my world shattered..." thinking for a bit to think of something else as he was sorta pulling himself together more, the more he talked to Luthor, someone that cared for him. "When I was insane, not myself. I thought to make myself more beautiful as I couldn't have what I truly wanted. In that rage I plucked my feathers on my wrists and ankles and cut desins in my skin with a razor blade in the bathroom....as I thought it would make myself more beautiful. I was stopped before I could bleed to death and brought here to be saved and then to be forgotten." It has been really hard to tell Luthor this as it was the truely first time he had clearly thought about what he did. Head hanging low waiting for Luthor to answer him. He truely hated his mother for not being there for him, to help him throught this. "If you want to see some proof just lift up one of my pant legs to see the bandges." If he did want to look, Luthor would see that those bandages were slightly bloody.

He thought for a second that Luthor was going to leave as he had drew back from him, but then saw that he was crawling around him looking at the jacket and knew what he was trying to do. Even in his insane times one part of his brain always watched and remembered the information gathered even if his shatter self always didn't listen. "I cant remember how the whole jacket come off, but the sleaves are lached tightly to my back and there should be something there to unhook them." he said moving his arm around so wanting to get them lose for longer than the techs aloud him.

In some why even Ciaran didn't know why he did, he just so wanted to be more beautiful than he already was. The easy way would just to blame it all on his Envy genes but he knew it was his fault for going it was something he was going to have to live with. Thinking for a second, he did want to get out and give his friend hugs, but then if he did go insane he didn't know what would happen then. "I think it would be ok for now, just as long as I can stay sane." Ciaran knew he would stay more sane with his friend around, becasue Luthor cared for him and that is what he wanted. "But if you do leave you do need to hook them back in place."

He thought for a second and he knew that he need to fix himself but he ressled with himself should he really tell someone what had drove him to this point in his life. Well his family already knew from reading his journal, but if he really told someone himself would it help him to heal. He shruged it didn't hurt to try. "Luthor..."he started as he sorta looked away. "The thing that drove me to this point, I guess would have to be my envious nature for wanting wings that I will never have. It was something I so wanted that I lacked, but then it was shattered by those I did love." he said slightly feeling better about telling someone but still very sad and just really wanting to get out of this white room.