Welcome to Gaia! ::

The Underground: A Guild for Christian Teens

Back to Guilds

Where Christian Teens and Twenty-Somethings can hang out and glorify God together. 

Tags: Christianity, Faith, Religion, Bible, Roleplaying 

Reply Underground HQ
Need Advice...PLEASE Goto Page: 1 2 3 [>] [»|]

Quick Reply

Enter both words below, separated by a space:

Can't read the text? Click here

Submit

Rosetta Fantasy

PostPosted: Thu Feb 05, 2009 1:33 pm


Hey guys! I just need some advice on this one problem I have. There's this guy I knew for about a year and a half now who I chat with at school, and he's a really sweet friend. However, I think he has a crush on me. He keeps on giving me gifts, asks me to have dinner or see a movie with him (obviously asking me on a date), and even openly told me that he believes I'm his girlfriend. redface sweatdrop

What's the problem, you ask? I think he's a nonbeliever. He says he's a Christian, however when I asked him when he accepted Christ, he said he was raised in a Christian family that goes to church and has always been a Christian since birth, which we all know that's not according to the Bible. I think he assumes that he's a Christian because his parents are Christian.

I know we're not suppose to have romantic commitments with nonbelievers according to 2 Corinthians 6:14, but the temptations are really getting to me. I don't want to hurt his feelings by refusing to accept his "love". I know it wouldn't be right to date him if I don't really like him back, but I feel like I'm falling into the temptation since I never had a guy have a crush on me before. What should I do?
PostPosted: Thu Feb 05, 2009 6:44 pm


Tell him everything you told us. Tell him why you can't date him, tell him that his parent's faith can't save him, and if you don't really like him back then you need to tell him that too. Have some tact about it, of course, but to keep sort of leading him on like this isn't right. I mean, try and put yourself in his shoes. If you liked someone, and they didn't really have as much interest in you, wouldn't you want to know?

[.L.O.S.E.R.]
Crew


Voldemort point two
Crew

PostPosted: Fri Feb 06, 2009 10:11 am


As LOSER said, but also: pray for him. And be honest, and ask if you can still be friends.
PostPosted: Sat Feb 07, 2009 9:11 am


Oi. Come on people. Being saved has nothing to actually do with being Christian. You can be saved and still be far from God. The people I talk to that claim to be saved, are far from godly. Remember, we are all sinners. Just because you claim to being saved does not make you any closer to God. A pagan may not be saved according to your standards but are closer to God than what you think. If he believes in Jesus, God and the Holy Spirit then he is a Christian. That is one of the basic definitions of a Christian. Again just because you claim to be saved does not automatically make you a Christian. He could be closer to God than what you think. So don't assume just because he can't tell you he's been saved, means that he's a non-Christian. Remember assume makes an arse out of me and you.

And take it from me, religion doesn't matter in a relationship. If you truly love him then that's all that matters. Dating or even marrying someone just because of their religion, is what make that love fake and sometimes make it not work. Loving someone because of religion is like loving someone because of money. It doesn't work out and it is a false love. Remember that the divorce rate is 50% possibly more and the majority of those divorces comes from Christians.

Aridane Avalon

Hilarious Lunatic

12,700 Points
  • First step to fame 200
  • Consumer 100
  • Millionaire 200

Voldemort point two
Crew

PostPosted: Sat Feb 07, 2009 10:37 am


Dai Kiwadaki
Oi. Come on people. Being saved has nothing to actually do with being Christian.


True. But, she was saying that this guy says he's been a Christian since birth, which is impossible. Wait, what am I saying?!?!?!?!?!?! That's like saying being unhappy has nothing to do with actually being sad! THEY'RE JUST DIFFERENT WAYS OF SAYING THE SAME THING.

Dai Kiwadaki
If he believes in Jesus, God and the Holy Spirit then he is a Christian


James 2:19 - You believe that there is one God. Good! Even the demons believe that—and shudder. Anyway, I thought you said he wasn't a Christian but was still saved.

Dai Kiwadaki
Again just because you claim to be saved does not automatically make you a Christian

No. BEING saved makes you a Christian, which entails accepting Christ, and confessing with your mouth that He is lord. And didn't you just say that they weren't related? (Being a Christian and being saved)

Dai Kiwadaki
So don't assume just because he can't tell you he's been saved, means that he's a non-Christian

Hmm. True.

"8But what does it say? "The word is near you; it is in your mouth and in your heart,"[a] that is, the word of faith we are proclaiming: 9That if you confess with your mouth, "Jesus is Lord," and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. 10For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you confess and are saved." (Romans 10: 8-10)

However, if he's never DONE that, then he's not a Christian.

Dai Kiwadaki
And take it from me, religion doesn't matter in a relationship

2 Corinthians 6:14 - Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?

From the context (http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?book_id=54&chapter=6&version=31) it's clear that Paul is talking about marriage, and you shouldn't date someone you know you're not going to marry. Also, missionary dating is a big no no, especially if the guy you're talking about won't even accept that he needs Christ.

So, take it from the Bible and from me: religion matters in a relationship.

Dai Kiwadaki
Loving someone because of religion is like loving someone because of money

True. But would you want to spend the rest of your life with someone you knew was going to Hell? Anyway, Christianity isn't a religion per se. It's a relationship.
PostPosted: Sat Feb 07, 2009 12:20 pm


Voldemort point two
Dai Kiwadaki
Oi. Come on people. Being saved has nothing to actually do with being Christian.


True. But, she was saying that this guy says he's been a Christian since birth, which is impossible. Wait, what am I saying?!?!?!?!?!?! That's like saying being unhappy has nothing to do with actually being sad! THEY'RE JUST DIFFERENT WAYS OF SAYING THE SAME THING.

Dai Kiwadaki
If he believes in Jesus, God and the Holy Spirit then he is a Christian


James 2:19 - You believe that there is one God. Good! Even the demons believe that—and shudder. Anyway, I thought you said he wasn't a Christian but was still saved.

Dai Kiwadaki
Again just because you claim to be saved does not automatically make you a Christian

No. BEING saved makes you a Christian, which entails accepting Christ, and confessing with your mouth that He is lord. And didn't you just say that they weren't related? (Being a Christian and being saved)

Dai Kiwadaki
So don't assume just because he can't tell you he's been saved, means that he's a non-Christian

Hmm. True.

"8But what does it say? "The word is near you; it is in your mouth and in your heart,"[a] that is, the word of faith we are proclaiming: 9That if you confess with your mouth, "Jesus is Lord," and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. 10For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you confess and are saved." (Romans 10: 8-10)

However, if he's never DONE that, then he's not a Christian.

Dai Kiwadaki
And take it from me, religion doesn't matter in a relationship

2 Corinthians 6:14 - Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?

From the context (http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?book_id=54&chapter=6&version=31) it's clear that Paul is talking about marriage, and you shouldn't date someone you know you're not going to marry. Also, missionary dating is a big no no, especially if the guy you're talking about won't even accept that he needs Christ.

So, take it from the Bible and from me: religion matters in a relationship.

Dai Kiwadaki
Loving someone because of religion is like loving someone because of money

True. But would you want to spend the rest of your life with someone you knew was going to Hell? Anyway, Christianity isn't a religion per se. It's a relationship.
My dad's an atheist. Do you think I care? He's a good person regardless of what he believes or doesn't believe. He treats me like an equal REGARDLESS of that. Jesus treated non-believers the same as he treated believers. He loved everyone regardless of their religious affilation. Follow more on what Jesus did rather than what the Bible says he did or what the Bible says.

Aridane Avalon

Hilarious Lunatic

12,700 Points
  • First step to fame 200
  • Consumer 100
  • Millionaire 200

Voldemort point two
Crew

PostPosted: Sat Feb 07, 2009 12:28 pm


Dai Kiwadaki
My dad's an atheist. Do you think I care? He's a good person regardless of what he believes or doesn't believe. He treats me like an equal REGARDLESS of that. Jesus treated non-believers the same as he treated believers. He loved everyone regardless of their religious affilation. Follow more on what Jesus did rather than what the Bible says he did or what the Bible says.


There's a huge difference between treating someone as an equal and marrying them. You have to do the former to do the latter, but the latter is not required for the former. That means you don't have to marry someone (because dating when you know you're going to split up is just pointless) to treat them as an equal. Are you dating your dad? No. That still means you can treat him as an equal.

I don't have anything against atheists, and I never once bashed atheism in that post. I think athestic evolution is stupid, but that's about as far as I'll go. Jesus DID love everyone, and part of that was dying for them so that if they only accept His forgiveness, they'll go to Heaven. Us loving non-Christians means that we should pray for them and try to show them Jesus' love.

"What the Bible says He did" makes it sound like you're saying the Bible is wrong. How do you know what He did if not for the Bible?
PostPosted: Sat Feb 07, 2009 2:24 pm


Voldemort point two
Dai Kiwadaki
My dad's an atheist. Do you think I care? He's a good person regardless of what he believes or doesn't believe. He treats me like an equal REGARDLESS of that. Jesus treated non-believers the same as he treated believers. He loved everyone regardless of their religious affilation. Follow more on what Jesus did rather than what the Bible says he did or what the Bible says.


There's a huge difference between treating someone as an equal and marrying them. You have to do the former to do the latter, but the latter is not required for the former. That means you don't have to marry someone (because dating when you know you're going to split up is just pointless) to treat them as an equal. Are you dating your dad? No. That still means you can treat him as an equal.

I don't have anything against atheists, and I never once bashed atheism in that post. I think athestic evolution is stupid, but that's about as far as I'll go. Jesus DID love everyone, and part of that was dying for them so that if they only accept His forgiveness, they'll go to Heaven. Us loving non-Christians means that we should pray for them and try to show them Jesus' love.

"What the Bible says He did" makes it sound like you're saying the Bible is wrong. How do you know what He did if not for the Bible?
Because of history and archaology my friend. ^.^ Because of reports outside of the Bible say.

And I have dated an atheist and a Wiccan and a Pagan. I have treated them the same as I treat everyone else and thought that the relationship would last. It didn't due to the fact that they were finicky, flaky, etc, not because of their religion. In fact it didn't matter to me. I let them alone and they let me alone when it came to religion. Remember, there is an invisible boundary line between you and the other person. As long as you respect that and do not cross, then all is well. Remember there is no religion that fits all. That is why in the US there is something called Freedom of Religion, allowing us to choose whatever religion we want and hopefully not be bothered.

Aridane Avalon

Hilarious Lunatic

12,700 Points
  • First step to fame 200
  • Consumer 100
  • Millionaire 200

[.L.O.S.E.R.]
Crew

PostPosted: Sat Feb 07, 2009 9:13 pm


There is no "invisible boundary line" between a Christian and their spouse. Or, at least there isn't supposed to be. Jesus himself says in Mark 10:7-8 "7'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, 8and the two will become one flesh.' So they are no longer two, but one." It's no longer just "me," it's "us." Keeping parts of ourselves out of our spouses reach will do nothing good for our marriages.

And it doesn't matter that America has the Freedom of Religion. I mean, don't get me wrong: I'm all for it. I value the lives that were lost to obtain and protect that right. But just because the constitution says we can do something doesn't make it okay in God's eyes. The first amendment also gives me the right to freedom of speech, and because of that right I could stand on the street corner shouting any sort of lies I wanted. However, God says he doesn't like it when we lie, so I must refrain from doing that.

Since it seems to me that you follow your own version of non-Biblical Christianity, I'll put this in simple terms. Marrying an unsaved person is like marrying someone who says that your dad, whom you love very dearly, doesn't exist. (If you happen to have a bad relationship with your dad, play along just for a minute.) Even though your dad has raised you, clothed you, fed you, taught you, and has made major contributions to who you are as a person both physically and emotionally, for some reason your spouse will refuse to acknowledge that he is real, and considers your relationship with your father a mere fantasy. Would you marry that person?

And a final clarification: If you believe my tone is angry or condescending, it is not intentional. I am merely trying to have a calm, rational discussion.
PostPosted: Sun Feb 08, 2009 2:09 am


Dai Kiwadaki
Because of history and archaology my friend. ^.^ Because of reports outside of the Bible say.

Uh huh... but the Bible is completely true. History and archeology can be flawed, but the Bible isn't.

Dai Kiwadaki
I have treated them the same as I treat everyone else and thought that the relationship would last.

The Bible tells us not to be yoked together with an unbeliever. That means marriage (it could also be a work partnership, but from the context it's more likely to be marriage). Also, would you want to spend your life with someone who's going to Hell?

Dai Kiwadaki
Remember there is no religion that fits all

Jesus is the ONLY Way, the ONLY Truth and the ONLY Life. I don't care if it's small minded and bigoted, because it's true. You might think the fact that people say we can only fly with help (such as an aeroplane) is small minded and bigoted, but it's true.

We can only get to Heaven and find real happiness with help. There are lots of things that can help us fly (helicopters, planes, rockets, hangliders) but there's only one Who can help us get to Heaven. (By "help us get to Heaven", I mean save us and forgive us. Just to clarify)

Everything LOSER
...

Yes. I agree. smile

Heheh, I used it! XP

Voldemort point two
Crew


Aridane Avalon

Hilarious Lunatic

12,700 Points
  • First step to fame 200
  • Consumer 100
  • Millionaire 200
PostPosted: Sun Feb 08, 2009 3:20 pm


[.L.O.S.E.R.]
There is no "invisible boundary line" between a Christian and their spouse. Or, at least there isn't supposed to be. Jesus himself says in Mark 10:7-8 "7'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, 8and the two will become one flesh.' So they are no longer two, but one." It's no longer just "me," it's "us." Keeping parts of ourselves out of our spouses reach will do nothing good for our marriages.

And it doesn't matter that America has the Freedom of Religion. I mean, don't get me wrong: I'm all for it. I value the lives that were lost to obtain and protect that right. But just because the constitution says we can do something doesn't make it okay in God's eyes. The first amendment also gives me the right to freedom of speech, and because of that right I could stand on the street corner shouting any sort of lies I wanted. However, God says he doesn't like it when we lie, so I must refrain from doing that.

Since it seems to me that you follow your own version of non-Biblical Christianity, I'll put this in simple terms. Marrying an unsaved person is like marrying someone who says that your dad, whom you love very dearly, doesn't exist. (If you happen to have a bad relationship with your dad, play along just for a minute.) Even though your dad has raised you, clothed you, fed you, taught you, and has made major contributions to who you are as a person both physically and emotionally, for some reason your spouse will refuse to acknowledge that he is real, and considers your relationship with your father a mere fantasy. Would you marry that person?

And a final clarification: If you believe my tone is angry or condescending, it is not intentional. I am merely trying to have a calm, rational discussion.
Those that believe there is no invisible boundary line are the ones with the least respect for themselves. We all like to do our own thing in private. We don't like people invading in that privacy, so why should we do it to others.

And the example you used, is how do I saw this, highly unlikely and illogical. My dad is a great guy, and the people that know me and have met him, know that. Some of them secretly thank him for the way he's brought me up. Without him I wouldn't be a strong person. I use common sense and logic wheras you seem to live in a fantasy world that you think is logic. Seems to me that your vision is clouded with your own ill wills. Why is that?
PostPosted: Mon Feb 09, 2009 9:05 am


Dai Kiwadaki
[.L.O.S.E.R.]
There is no "invisible boundary line" between a Christian and their spouse. Or, at least there isn't supposed to be. Jesus himself says in Mark 10:7-8 "7'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, 8and the two will become one flesh.' So they are no longer two, but one." It's no longer just "me," it's "us." Keeping parts of ourselves out of our spouses reach will do nothing good for our marriages.

And it doesn't matter that America has the Freedom of Religion. I mean, don't get me wrong: I'm all for it. I value the lives that were lost to obtain and protect that right. But just because the constitution says we can do something doesn't make it okay in God's eyes. The first amendment also gives me the right to freedom of speech, and because of that right I could stand on the street corner shouting any sort of lies I wanted. However, God says he doesn't like it when we lie, so I must refrain from doing that.

Since it seems to me that you follow your own version of non-Biblical Christianity, I'll put this in simple terms. Marrying an unsaved person is like marrying someone who says that your dad, whom you love very dearly, doesn't exist. (If you happen to have a bad relationship with your dad, play along just for a minute.) Even though your dad has raised you, clothed you, fed you, taught you, and has made major contributions to who you are as a person both physically and emotionally, for some reason your spouse will refuse to acknowledge that he is real, and considers your relationship with your father a mere fantasy. Would you marry that person?

And a final clarification: If you believe my tone is angry or condescending, it is not intentional. I am merely trying to have a calm, rational discussion.
Those that believe there is no invisible boundary line are the ones with the least respect for themselves. We all like to do our own thing in private. We don't like people invading in that privacy, so why should we do it to others.

And the example you used, is how do I saw this, highly unlikely and illogical. My dad is a great guy, and the people that know me and have met him, know that. Some of them secretly thank him for the way he's brought me up. Without him I wouldn't be a strong person. I use common sense and logic wheras you seem to live in a fantasy world that you think is logic. Seems to me that your vision is clouded with your own ill wills. Why is that?

:/
Exactly. You don't like it when LOSER even uses that as an example. If atheists thought properly, they would thank God for the person He's made me. And they say that He doesn't exist. See, it's exactly the same.

And... well, you're proof that, as you said, the majority of divorces are from Christians. Probably because they all think like that.

Voldemort point two
Crew


Misconstrudel

5,500 Points
  • Forum Sophomore 300
  • Signature Look 250
  • Wall Street 200
PostPosted: Mon Feb 09, 2009 12:55 pm


Ouch. It's like a war in here.

Advice: It is NOT fun to date somebody you don't like in that way. And if one guy likes you, you can bet there are others.

wink
PostPosted: Tue Feb 10, 2009 5:14 am


Voldemort point two
Dai Kiwadaki
[.L.O.S.E.R.]
There is no "invisible boundary line" between a Christian and their spouse. Or, at least there isn't supposed to be. Jesus himself says in Mark 10:7-8 "7'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, 8and the two will become one flesh.' So they are no longer two, but one." It's no longer just "me," it's "us." Keeping parts of ourselves out of our spouses reach will do nothing good for our marriages.

And it doesn't matter that America has the Freedom of Religion. I mean, don't get me wrong: I'm all for it. I value the lives that were lost to obtain and protect that right. But just because the constitution says we can do something doesn't make it okay in God's eyes. The first amendment also gives me the right to freedom of speech, and because of that right I could stand on the street corner shouting any sort of lies I wanted. However, God says he doesn't like it when we lie, so I must refrain from doing that.

Since it seems to me that you follow your own version of non-Biblical Christianity, I'll put this in simple terms. Marrying an unsaved person is like marrying someone who says that your dad, whom you love very dearly, doesn't exist. (If you happen to have a bad relationship with your dad, play along just for a minute.) Even though your dad has raised you, clothed you, fed you, taught you, and has made major contributions to who you are as a person both physically and emotionally, for some reason your spouse will refuse to acknowledge that he is real, and considers your relationship with your father a mere fantasy. Would you marry that person?

And a final clarification: If you believe my tone is angry or condescending, it is not intentional. I am merely trying to have a calm, rational discussion.
Those that believe there is no invisible boundary line are the ones with the least respect for themselves. We all like to do our own thing in private. We don't like people invading in that privacy, so why should we do it to others.

And the example you used, is how do I saw this, highly unlikely and illogical. My dad is a great guy, and the people that know me and have met him, know that. Some of them secretly thank him for the way he's brought me up. Without him I wouldn't be a strong person. I use common sense and logic wheras you seem to live in a fantasy world that you think is logic. Seems to me that your vision is clouded with your own ill wills. Why is that?

:/
Exactly. You don't like it when LOSER even uses that as an example. If atheists thought properly, they would thank God for the person He's made me. And they say that He doesn't exist. See, it's exactly the same.

And... well, you're proof that, as you said, the majority of divorces are from Christians. Probably because they all think like that.
Actually no. My parents are still together. Even though my dad is an atheist and my mum is Catholic. They've been married for 20 years and are still going strong. The only way it can end is if my mum leaves or croaks. And i'm currently 18.

The reason why there are divorces among Christians is because you have two people from different denominations marrying. Each denomination has a different doctrine, blah blah blah. So when you have two of the most conflicting denominations, it's not going to work out well...for example my grandma is Protestant and my Grandpa is Catholic (and German). They've been together for 46 years. (I'm still trying to figure out how they do it...they drive themselves up the freaking well. And I want to visit them in the summer...>.<)

Aridane Avalon

Hilarious Lunatic

12,700 Points
  • First step to fame 200
  • Consumer 100
  • Millionaire 200

Voldemort point two
Crew

PostPosted: Tue Feb 10, 2009 8:52 am


Dai Kiwadaki
Voldemort point two
Dai Kiwadaki
[.L.O.S.E.R.]
There is no "invisible boundary line" between a Christian and their spouse. Or, at least there isn't supposed to be. Jesus himself says in Mark 10:7-8 "7'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, 8and the two will become one flesh.' So they are no longer two, but one." It's no longer just "me," it's "us." Keeping parts of ourselves out of our spouses reach will do nothing good for our marriages.

And it doesn't matter that America has the Freedom of Religion. I mean, don't get me wrong: I'm all for it. I value the lives that were lost to obtain and protect that right. But just because the constitution says we can do something doesn't make it okay in God's eyes. The first amendment also gives me the right to freedom of speech, and because of that right I could stand on the street corner shouting any sort of lies I wanted. However, God says he doesn't like it when we lie, so I must refrain from doing that.

Since it seems to me that you follow your own version of non-Biblical Christianity, I'll put this in simple terms. Marrying an unsaved person is like marrying someone who says that your dad, whom you love very dearly, doesn't exist. (If you happen to have a bad relationship with your dad, play along just for a minute.) Even though your dad has raised you, clothed you, fed you, taught you, and has made major contributions to who you are as a person both physically and emotionally, for some reason your spouse will refuse to acknowledge that he is real, and considers your relationship with your father a mere fantasy. Would you marry that person?

And a final clarification: If you believe my tone is angry or condescending, it is not intentional. I am merely trying to have a calm, rational discussion.
Those that believe there is no invisible boundary line are the ones with the least respect for themselves. We all like to do our own thing in private. We don't like people invading in that privacy, so why should we do it to others.

And the example you used, is how do I saw this, highly unlikely and illogical. My dad is a great guy, and the people that know me and have met him, know that. Some of them secretly thank him for the way he's brought me up. Without him I wouldn't be a strong person. I use common sense and logic wheras you seem to live in a fantasy world that you think is logic. Seems to me that your vision is clouded with your own ill wills. Why is that?

:/
Exactly. You don't like it when LOSER even uses that as an example. If atheists thought properly, they would thank God for the person He's made me. And they say that He doesn't exist. See, it's exactly the same.

And... well, you're proof that, as you said, the majority of divorces are from Christians. Probably because they all think like that.
Actually no. My parents are still together. Even though my dad is an atheist and my mum is Catholic. They've been married for 20 years and are still going strong. The only way it can end is if my mum leaves or croaks. And i'm currently 18.

The reason why there are divorces among Christians is because you have two people from different denominations marrying. Each denomination has a different doctrine, blah blah blah. So when you have two of the most conflicting denominations, it's not going to work out well...for example my grandma is Protestant and my Grandpa is Catholic (and German). They've been together for 46 years. (I'm still trying to figure out how they do it...they drive themselves up the freaking well. And I want to visit them in the summer...>.<)

Um, it's probably because Christians actually marry, instead of sleeping with someone without actually marrying. Or (and this is the most likely) it's because people say they're Christians and aren't really. They just follow some of the rules, like no sex outside marriage. Then they marry and break up because they get "bored" of their spouse. Or they rush into it.
Reply
Underground HQ

Goto Page: 1 2 3 [>] [»|]
 
Manage Your Items
Other Stuff
Get GCash
Offers
Get Items
More Items
Where Everyone Hangs Out
Other Community Areas
Virtual Spaces
Fun Stuff
Gaia's Games
Mini-Games
Play with GCash
Play with Platinum