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 Posted: Thu Jan 29, 2009 5:39 pm
At nine o' clock that evening, Oliver Jones was running back to the curiosity shop, dragging a strange lump behind him. He was in no good mood, having just recently been dumped by his girlfriend, woken up with the hangover of a century, and found a child eating his leftover pizza and making garments from his decor. He did not want to deal with this, especially after the day he'd been having. Wild eyed, he looked for the storefront where he had first gotten the quarto, because he thought the kid had wandered in on his own, but after you heard it talk, and coupled with the fact the damn book was gone, it was obvious where the brat had really come from. He scanned the street. No... No... Yes! He pounded in, looking around for the blue haired shopkeeper and yelling. "OY! OY! SITUATION HERE!" He was holding the blonde haired toddler by the scruff of its neck and the child could not have looked more delighted. This funny, crazy, yelling man was interesting and plus he was getting a free ride. Blissfully, he sewed up his sleeve. He could get used to this.
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Posted: Thu Jan 29, 2009 6:26 pm
Switch was doodling on a piece of paper she'd found in her desk, having long sinced stopped cleaning the place. It was futile, and she had had a rough few days. She was pondering closing the shop early today because not only was she tired, but she was sick of being in a shop that was filled with dust, no matter what she did to it. As she pondered she doodled, and before she knew it the door was thrown open and someone was yelling. The sudden noise startled her so badly that she jumped with a yelp, her pen making an unintended, sharp line across the paper.
Her mood instantly took a turn for the worst. But it was a customer, and she had to be nice to this customer. Getting up from her desk, she headed towards the front door.
"Good Evening! I'm sorry to hear that---" She paused in her walk. "Oh its you. Well, never mind then." Her nice greeting was cut off when she recognized the male, and her fake cheery facade fell to show what she was really feeling; irritable and tired.
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Posted: Thu Jan 29, 2009 6:39 pm
Oliver was too irritable and irrational at the moment to notice the woman's tone. "You..." he spluttered. "This... THING!" He thrust the toddler at Switch and the blonde haired boy looked up at her gleefully. "Have a Funny Man." it proclaimed proudly. "Nnnngh! What the Hell! Very droll." Oliver glared at Switch. "This thing talks just like a Shakespeare quarto." he said slowly. "It has made clothing out of my tablecloth and curtains, and it keeps coming back no matter how many orphanages I leave it in front of." The child nodded back and forth, as if proud at this list of accomplishments. "Funfunfunfun." it said ecstatically. "Funny Man is most persistent." Oliver glared at it. "I don't know if you've recognized this, but I am NOT a fathering type of person. Furthermore, I have not even had the fun a fathering type of person usually gets to have before becoming a father and I have a hangover bigger than the store we are standing in!" The toddler looked down. "Not standing." it said, referring to itself. "Flying, most enjoyable!" Oliver glared again and took a moment to calm down. "So what do I do to get rid of it?" he asked Switch testily.
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Posted: Thu Jan 29, 2009 7:06 pm
Switch tried looking at the man. She tried taking him seriously, really she did. But her gaze kept going to the adorable blondie he was holding, and the blue-haired woman found herself laughing more than she did listening. The boy was funny! It made the Guardian's unhappy ramblings funnier than they would have been.
"Well, it looks to me like you got yourself a very talented, very interesting son." Switch said, her mood elevated by the adorable little boy. She figured it was a boy, since he'd made pants and not a dress...which would have been much easier to sew. Her hands went to her hips and her stance widened a little; clearly not the timid woman most people saw her to be. "Oh come now, I'm sure you've had that sort of fun countless times before, its about time fate dealt you this blow. At least be thankful that this kid didn't come from one of the women you've no doubt bedded." The woman was chuckling. "At least this way you won't have to pay child support." Sighing, she relaxed her stance to slightly lean back against one of the tables.
"You can't get rid of him. He's yours, and there are no returns."
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Posted: Thu Jan 29, 2009 7:26 pm
Oliver shook the kid a little for emphasis. The fact that it made little 'whee' noises did not do anything to improve his mood. "Child support is better than supporting a child!" he spat. "I do NOT have time to raise a weird brat. Can't I sell it to someone else or something? Pay an orphanage to take it?"
At this point, the boy spoke up, addressing Oliver. "Not Brat." it insisted. "My name is most certainlye Gregory." He looked very insistent upon this and Oliver recoiled. "What kind of a kid names itself, makes its own clothing, and speaks that well?" he demanded of Switch. "It's clearly psychotic and it's going to kill me in my sleep!" Gregory grinned, as if flattered by the idea. "I don't know what kind of schtick you're running here," Oliver continued, "But I want some answers. This thing is DEFINITELY not worth five dollars."
Gregory paused and counted on his fingers. "No." he agreed. "Worth at least $2500000." Suddenly, Oliver was very quiet, and Gregory continued. "Verily, first edition. $2.5 million." He beamed. "Very good, yes?"
"Then is there any way to make him a book again?" Oliver asked eventually, sounding a bit hoarse.
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Posted: Thu Jan 29, 2009 7:56 pm
"If you say it like that, its the same thing." Switch glared at the Guardian, but her eyes fell back on the adorable boy. He seemed to be having fun! A sharp contrast from Ryan. "No, you have to raise him. He's yours, he'd bonded to you, he unconsciously chose to be in your life, you can't drop him off at an orphanage." She growled at the guardian, clearly unhappy with the suggestion. Seriously, were all males in Durem this stupid? Gregory? His name was Gregory? How sweet!
"Like I said, a very talented, very interesting son." Really, Gregory truely was interesting! "He's not going to kill you in your sleep, and I owe you nothing. You picked up the item, I have it to you for free, and your five dollar bill is now in a landfill." So really, she owed him nothing. "Its the shop. Some of the items in here have a will to live, and they choose their Guardians and lure them here. I'm just the one that keeps it open." Frustrating this man was funny, since Gregory was around!
Her grin could have put the cheshire cat to shame, when Gregory recounted the value of the book he came from. "No, you can't make him a book again. He'll grow up like any other Gaian child." There was a pause, and then a laugh. "Do you believe in Karma now?"
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Posted: Fri Jan 30, 2009 1:17 pm
Oliver swore. "Karma, my a**. I haven't done anything to deserve this!" He felt Gregory struggling, apparently tired of flying and dropped the toddler to the floor, where he landed with a resounding thump and proceeded to tug on Oliver's pant leg. "You have to at least give people warning! This whole operation is immoral, and I swear I will find a way to shut you do-WHAT IS IT GREGORY?" he roared as the Shakespearean tot nearly tugged his pant leg off. Gregory looked at him solemnly. "Unchivalrous, Funny Man." he proclaimed. "Not the correct way to woo fair maid." Oliver made complicated spluttering noises. "Great. He's a moralizer to boot, just great." He sagged and ran a hand through his hair. Gregory grinned widely, sensing defeat, and looked up at the adults. "Hungryyyy," he whined. "Funny Man's foodstuffs were most unappetizing. Hungry."
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Posted: Fri Jan 30, 2009 2:05 pm
Switch's expression darkened dangerously when he started to threaten her. "I can't give you warning." She growled out, her hands moving back to her hips. Usually she wanted to give the soon-to-be parents warning, but with this guy, she didn't want to from the start. So it worked out. "I'd like to see you try to take me down." The blue haired woman challenged, her green eyes dark. "You won't get far, I promise you that." There weren't any records of her shop ever owning a first edition copy of one of Shakespeare's Quartos, nor were there records of a purchase made between them, or that he even came into the shop itself. Switch only kept records of who purchased things; she could recall from memory what items she'd given for free. The woman was grinning wickedly, her arms falling from her hips to hang at her sides.
Her fists clenched when he yelled at the boy, and one arm even began its rise in an attempt to hit the man...but she stopped herself when the man sagged. "You could learn something from him, scum." The normally timid woman said flatly before she knelt down to the boy's level, but her gaze was still on the Guardian. "He is your son now, you have to raise him." With that, she turned
"Nice to meet you Gregory! My name is Switch. I'm sorry I didn't get the chance to say that before." A sharp glare was cast up to the Guardian. Yet another male to make it to her hate list. "What kind of food would you like? I might be able to order something for you...all I have is left overs from last night." The angry, dangerous-looking woman was gone, replaced by a more Motherly aura; her expression was softer, her voice was lighter, and her smile was genuine. It was like a metaphorical switch had gone off in her mind.
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Posted: Tue Feb 03, 2009 4:40 pm
Gregory looked disappointed. "Cessation of yelling." he noted. Maybe he had pushed Funny Man too hard. The yelling had been very droll, and he was disappointed to see it stop, but sensed it was best to stop egging the man on before the blue haired woman killed him. He beamed at the new face. "Pleasure." he informed Switch, and tapped his chin thoughtfully. "Do not slay Funny Man. Has much to learn." He patted Oliver's shoulder proprietorially. "Like good food. 'Pizza', quite unappetizing. Something that is not pizza shall suffice." He beamed at her, clearly pleased with how events were turning out. Oliver looked darkly furious, but bit his tongue, muttering.
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Posted: Fri Feb 06, 2009 10:33 am
"Hm." Was Switch's only comment to what Gregory had to say about the food he would like; she had leftovers from last night, and she definitely hadn't been hungry all day...she saw no reason to give Gregory the food she wouldn't eat today. "Okay then, if you two Gentlemen-" The term was used loosely, and there may have been a hint of a smug look towards Oliver. "-will excuse me, I'll go get something for our little Quarto here."
With that, she disappeared into the door that was somewhat behind the main desk, to return about ten minutes later with a somewhat steaming tupperware container on a small folded up kitchen towel balanced on a glass full of water in one hand, the other one holding cutlery and what looked like a small bottle of medicine.
The medicine was stuffed in her front hoodie pocket, and she knelt down to Gregory to offer him the tupperware on the towel. It was her leftovers form the night before; pieces of already cut up skinless chicken with a couple of perogies and some vegetables. If he accepted it, she'd also give him the fork.
Once Gregory had his food, Switch stood up, handing the glass of water to Oliver. Once he took it she took the bottle from her pocket, took two pills from it, and put them in his free hand. "For your hangover." She said curtly.
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Posted: Fri Feb 06, 2009 1:52 pm
While Switch left, Gergory fidgeted, already bored with standing still. He played with Funny Man's leg for a moment, twisting the pants. The man watched him annoyedly, kicking out his leg in an irritated way.
When the woman came back with food, though, Gregory perked up considerably. "But soft, chicken! Fair maid, thou art a saint." Dashing over, he began to eat with less than impeccable manners. Oliver looked up from his newfound burden at Switch blearily, taking the medicine in one gulp. "Ah! God..." He blinked, and looked at Gregory again. "...God." He nudged the boy unceremoniously with his foot. "Eat with your mouth closed." he grumbled, and nudged him harder when he was ignored. "I SAID eat with your damn mouth closed." Gregory looked up from his chicken and obeyed this time. Satisfied, Oliver gave a grunt and said "Good."
He looked at Switch, feeling more alert. "Thanks." he said grudgingly, and then he frowned. "I thought all kids liked pizza."
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Posted: Thu Feb 12, 2009 1:39 pm
"You're welcome." The blue-haired woman replied happily when Gregory thanked her in his own way. Her attention then went back to the second male to make her hated list, watching him take the medicine. Naturally, his treatment of Gregory got him a pair of unhappily narrowed green eyes, but otherwise the woman said nothing. At least Gregory wasn't being hurt.
"Welcome. I thought so too, but Gregory seems to prove us both wrong." She laughed, crouching down in a squat, her elbows on her knees and her chin in her hands for the simple reason that she didn't feel like standing anymore. "My Curio boy would eat it every day as often as he could if given the chance." The woman was humming to herself for a moment or two before reaching out and patting the wood floor in an invitation to sit. "Maybe he'll get you into healthy eating habits, Ah hah.."
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Posted: Tue Feb 17, 2009 4:00 pm
Now that Oliver was feeling completely sober he began to wish he was drunk. Or distracted by a raging headache. Anything, really. But the medicine was kicking in, and it looked like Gregory had not rearranged himself into a more comforting shape, like a rabid dog. At last he'd have an excuse to get rid of a rabid dog. He sat down heavily next to switch and stared at the kid. "I'm not gonna change how I eat for some twerp." he said honestly and looked sideways at her. "If he wants to eat something else, he's going to have to learn to cook, blackmail, or order take out."
He waited for a moment, hoping once again that Gregory would vanish. Again, he was disappointed. "Who pays you to do this crap?" he asked despondently.
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Posted: Sun Feb 22, 2009 9:10 am
Switch's expression betrayed her complete distaste for the man. "You're such a kind man, I can see why he chose you for a father." She said flatly, with a hint of sarcasm. "But I wouldn't say your words are finite, though." Her gaze moved away from the pair, musing over how much she changed when she aquired Kay. It was bound to happen to this womanizing drunkard, too.
"Nobody pays me to do this. I wouldn't if I didn't have to. I don't get anything special to do this sort of thing...I can barely make enough to get by." Switch sighed heavily, running both sets of fingers through her short blue hair. "Life is tough, and it doesn't help the situation to have Guardians come screaming to me like its my fault while threatening to destroy me. It doesn't make it better and I can't change it for you." She said it pointedly, but her voice suggested it was more of a grumbling afterthought.
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Posted: Wed Feb 25, 2009 5:17 pm
"I'm not normally quite so raging and unreasonable, but I think it'd be pretty easy for a person when a weird kid appeared in his house, ate and insulted all his pizza, made clothes out of curtains he really sort of liked and then kept trying to reform him." Oliver pointed out in a way he probably thought was fairly. "You'd be screaming too. You know, underneath the drunken fury I might be a wonderful person." This was probably not true, but Switch wasn't to know. Right now even Oliver didn't know, but through the haze of the clearing hangover he did know he was going to at least get his money's worth grumbling. "Now I'm going to have to try to be responsible and decent. I think I deserve to get really drunk and yell at people at least once before that happens." He gave her a mock sad look.
He snorted. "Suit yourself. I wouldn't do this if I were you for anything less than a fat check at the end of every week."
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