Posca walked through the long grass, letting the dew soaked strands rub against her swollen sides. 8 cubs... 8 souls inside her. She could feel them even now. It was if she could hear every single heart beat like a drum ringing through her ears. She found herself laying for days just... listening. Counting each one a thousand times over. Each time one faded enough that she couldn't hear it her own broke a bit more... But it would return. And it was for that reason that her's continued to go on.
She was terrorfied. She'd never been this scared before. She had given birth before, long ago... But those were god children. These were mortals, weak and so fragile... Could she even give birth to them safely? Surely they would wither in perish in her womb... Their birth was a bittersweet longing. To see their faces for the first and last time. Here now they were a part of her, even if if that bond seemed so weak... She didn't even know what she would do with them when they were born... Iar was not the lion she thought he was. He was no great king. But he as their father... was it better than death?
She sighed and laid down in the swaying grass, eyes closing wearily. For a good while she just laid and listened.
Days had passed since bombei's meeting with the goddess of decay and rot. Days and weeks had passed, and with it the memory of that strange and wonderous creature. He'd found it odd at first, but then it made sense that something akin to a god would be hard for the mortal mind to hold onto too long from just one exposure. It did not help that the world around him seemed to flourish with life. He'd brought his charges, Zari and Kasi, to the fertile lands near the heart of Africa. With the demons pride to the south and the blood-beings to the west, it would seem a dangerous place, but Bombei had never feared them. They'd been sure to remain far enough from the bordersthat even an overeager guard wouldn't be willing to run so far out to gather them.
The two cubs were so alike, both young daughters of the world, both so small and slender. He found himself watching them play often. True, only Zari was his daughter, but he was just as fond of Kasi. She would carry on his skills, and with luck those skills would shield her from the world's predjudice against her kind. Such sweet children...And hungry too. They'd been well fed, but Bombei had laughed aloud at the last watering hole. While still massive to a stranger's eye, to himself he was nearly thin! He looked years younger, if only from trying to keep up with the energetic little paws of his cubs. After making the two promise to stay put and behave, he'd gone out hunting for something for himself. A plump zebra that had strayed just a bit too far from the herd fell to his claws, and he had eaten his fill before dragging the thing back to share.
Of course, that had been his plan until that strange, sickly sweet scent hit him. Familiarity did nothing to ease the initial shock, and he wheezed before clearing his nose with a huff and looking around. Surely a thinning waistline didn't call for the services of the Goddess of Decay, did it? "Posca...?"
The goddess lay with anxious worry, once again laying and listening to the weak heart beats. It hadn't been too long since she had become pregnant, but... with that many cubs, she was already showing... quite a bit. She was so lost in her thoughts that she didn't hear anyone weaving through the grass, and when he spoke she jerked to attention. Her black eyes opened and flickered around wildly for the source of the call. Who would be around here that knew her name? It... didn't sound like Iar...
With a grunt she pushed herself up a little, pointed ears perked as she glanced around. The grass around her was slowly turning brown and drier, making her hiding place fairly obvious. She saw the bits of grayish blue through the grass up ahead, though it took a few moments to recognize the old mortal. What was his name..?
"Storyteller? ...Bombei?"
Indeed the withering grass made it easy to find the source of the smell he'd picked up. It seemed a nearby tree the goddess had lain too near too was also feeling the effects, a few leaves browning and drooping lazily. "It's me, yes!" He trotted towards her, the remains of the zebra dragging under him. It occured to him then that it was likely the dead animal, and not his slimming figure, that had drawn her near. She would wait until they had finished eating it though, he assumed...and why did she look so...different? He slowed, instinct warning him to be cautious.
"I didn't expect to see you again so soon...Are you alright?" He dropped the meat outside the dead-zone and hung back a bit. Part of him felt it would be best to run, but much more of him could sense the worr hanging over the goddess. He knew how to see the feelings of others, his job required that skill. He was slightly less capable of noticing physical changes...but the lioness's swolled sides could not be missed. Maybe it had been longer than he'd thought. He hda had no ide she was to have cubs the last he'd seen her, wings spread wide as she soared up into the sky.
"Oh..." She called out softly, pushing herself up more, until she was standing. Now she was able to see over the grass better, and the fact it was slowly drooping helped as well. "I'm... fine." She didn't do well at hiding the grief in her voice. Posca was not one to lie. And well... she wasn't lieing. All in all, she was alright. She wasn't dieing after all. But she wasn't good. That was obvious.
"I'm sorry if I have disturbed your hunt." Her eyes flickered past him to the meat. She remembered his daughter, and did not want to burden him. She felt a slight twinge in her chest, a pain that started to throb. He was such a good parent... a good gaurdian. Something she could never be, even if she really wanted to... The thought made her grimace and she looked down, ears laying flat against her head.
Bombei felt himself begin to relax. He hadn't been chased off...maybe he was simply imagining her rounded form. As the grass bent it revealed her face, but the doubled ends better hid her stomach, and he dismissed the sight. For the moment. Of course he knew directly that the goddess was very much not fine, as far as he was concerned. Something was bothering her, and he realized that it upset him. With a life so hard, what more could have happened to cause her to look away, ears back so sharply? He caught her glance and tugged the meat closer. Was she hungry? "You're welcome to eat...if Gods eat?" He could not hide the flicker of curiosity that sparked in him.
Something was very wrong...He skirted the ring of grass, both fearing entering and wanting to. Still, it was likely for the best he remain outside. While comforting to others, his nearness could cause more concern...and he wanted to help, not hurt. "You didn't disturb me at all." He sat back with a grunt. This pacing was working himself up too. A beat passed as he looked her over. The bulge was still there. In an instant he knew, he understood the implications. New life. And the goddess of decay. Still, he felt it only right to ask, and not assume. "Posca...what's wrong?"
"We can eat... but we do not need to. Thank you for your kind offer, but the meat would rot into nothing before it slipped down my throat..." Still, she did look thankful past her worries. Her eyes stayed on the ground in front of her, lids heavy and drooped.
She sighed when he continued to question her. He was a kind mortal, that was for sure. But at the moment she wasn't sure if she welcomed the company or felt burdened by it. Surely a mortal would not understand her troubles. Still... she did not want to be rude. Especially to someone so noble. Such rare personalities should be rewarded.
"It is nothing you should burden yourself with, storyteller... My troubles are my own, but I thank you dearly for your concern. I merely fear for the lives of ones not yet born."
Bombei let his words die in his mouth at her sigh. He dipped his head in apology. He should have known better than to walk right up and ask after a possibly painful matter for her. "I'm sorry. It's not my place to pry," He admitted. "If you think it right, you shouldn't tell me." Sensing her mood, he nodded again and stepped back. He took up the zebra and (leaving a haunch behind, just in case) slowly dragged it off, back to his children to sate them for a time. He wouldn't smother Posca with his presence, but after a small bit of time he wandered back, resuming a spot a few lion-lengths from Posca and laying down in the yet-green grass.
He said nothing as he reclined, though his manner was not that of one who felt insulted or ignored. His ears perked gently forward, showing he was ready to listen without signaling her to begin. The silence was comfortable enough, and he glanced up, watching the clouds wisp by. When and if she decided to share, he would listen. If she would rather not, well he could always amuse her with a silly storyteller's version of the beginning of the world or something equally as cheerful and lighthearted.
She let him leave, though she wasn't quite sure if she was happy about his departure or not... Either way, she laid back down in the grass, curling up a bit in the dieing grass. Her wings drooped over her, curling around her like a large, thick black blanket. There she lay, listening to the heartbeats once again.
Of course, she knew he returned later. But it didn't seem so. For all he could tell, she seemed asleep. Her eyes were closed, but her chest rose and fell, her breaths deep and long. She seemed... at peace, though there was still a slight frown on her maw. Finally, after a bit of silence, she spoke.
"You said last time we met... that you would turn into nothing but a better father. Do you still wish that?"
Bombei had let the silence hang, eventually letting his head rest on his paws. His tail whisked gently at the grass, causing seeds to scatter into the dirt. His ears piqued a bit at her question and he raised his head to look above the grass at her reposed form. "Of course. I imgaine that even once Zari is grown and gone I'll still be trying to be a better father to her." He thought a bit and nodded to himself.
"Zari isn't my real daughter, of course. But that doesn't matter to me. She means the world to me, and because of that I'm willing to do my best to give her the best I can. In the end there's nothing I can do except that." He regarded her gently. He knew she was asking for reasons other than her interest in himself. He managed a small smile and added, "Even if all you can do in the end is love them, that's enough." He went quiet again, watching the two feeding cubs on a gentle slope a ways off. The faint smile blossomed into a beaming expression of contentment and love on his face. It might have been selfish of him to enjoy his life so much at that moment when Posca was so troubled over the same fact, but it was an honest expression.
Her eyes opened a little and she reguarded him pensively. The pain in her chest returned, and she realized that it was jealousy. She exhauled slowly, her frown deepening. He looked so happy... Posca knew she'd never share that happiness. That was never for her.
"You are a good mortal... and a good father." She shook her head then, eyes closing again. "Love is not enough... When expression such love means to kill your own young. You should be ever thankful for your gift, storyteller... It is one that many take for granted."
Bombei drew his eyes away from the romping cubs and his brow creased at Posca's face. He felt bad, having hurt her unintentionally. Her next words distressed him more than he tried to let himself show, though he couldn't help shifting to be a bit more upright. "I thank you for your kind words..." And here he found that he would have to hurt the already distressed Goddess to help her. A cruel irony he hoped she would forgive him for. He took a breath and frowned, trying to find the right expression between a frown and a sad smile.
"You're wrong. Killing those you care for...that's not love, though you might want it to be." In death they were truly hers. Hers to be with, in a way. Was it that the only way she could hug her cubs, could groom them with a gentle tonge, was in death that made her say such things? If so...then she was selfish. He tried to look stern, but found himself unable to bring such a look to his face. She was hurting, and he was making it worse. With luck it would lead to something better for her, but it had to be hard now. "If you loved them, you would let them live. Thinking only of the wrong that can happen will only beget that wrong...Give them the chance to find their own way back into your paws at the rightful end of their days. In the end they would understand." She could love from afar, and maybe her children would wonder if she had loved them at all, but knowing that she had given them life, and life enough to question her love, despite the pull of her domain should be enough.
She listened, though it only made he wish to weep more. If she was the type, she would have been angry. But... she wasn't. Decay was nuetral in all things, and so she was as well. She only became a touch sader, her eye lids drooping more until her eyes were nothing but black empty slits.
"Did I say I was going to kill them? How dare you imply that I do not know what I should do... what I have to do. I know that I shall have to leave them as soon as they are born... As it has always been..." Her tone was not accusing, her misery was directed at nothing in particular. It was just how things... were. She hated it, and longed for something more, but there was nothing to be done. It was no one's fault.
"No, love is not enough... But sacrifice... that is what you speak of, Storyteller. And that is what I must give them... I do not think I shall see them again... But that might be for the best, in the end. Perhaps they can be raised by different paws, never knowing the difference.... I hope that, at least... I'd like to think that my older children, which have surely reached adulthood by now... I hope that they got that opportunity as well. I've searched the world, but never found them."
Bombei ducked his head in difference to the goddess. "Forgive me, it was not my place to accuse you so, when it obviously hurts you enough already." His voice too was neutral. He felt for her, but he knew he'd had it in the right. It was a sad situation indeed. It was a bit of a surprise to hear she had had other cubs...and it made him ache all the more for her. Having to give up her children not once but twice...
He considered asking if the father could do such a job, but felt it too intrusive. "I'm sure someone will care for them. There are good people in the world. That you haven't found them..." Well they must have lived, if nothing else. He wondered abstractly if her previous children had been of another god. If she had left them, then likely not...As painful as it was to think, he knew she would find them again eventually. "I'm sure they've had lives as good as anyone could give them.." He wished he could reach out, offer a kindly touch or gesture...He rose, and bent to pluck a long frond of a fluffy-ended plant from the ground. It was still green, and as soft as fur. Careful to remain outside her ring of influence, he stretched the stem quickly in, gently touching it to her cheek as if to catch an invisible tear. He held the touch half a heartbeat and then let the plant drop from his jaws before it could shivel entirely down the length to him. "I'm sorry."
"I do hope so... That is how I think of them. Happy and aging, with children of their own... Families, something I couldn't give them." It was sad, knowing she'd probably not see them again, but it did make her feel better to know that they might be happy, regaurdless of what she did.
Posca blinked when he stood, eyes opening to a more content width, watching him move curiously. It was almost amusing when he plucked up the plant in order to carress her. The touch made her smile weakly, and then laugh just slightly. "Dear storyteller... Are you afraid of me?"
Bombei felt he couldn't have asked for more when Posca smiled again. If she'd taken the touch as a humorous one all the better. Laughter, they did say, was the greatest cure for the ails of the body and mind. He pondered her question a moment and looked down at the grass before glancing back up, flicking a bit of mane from his face. "No. Well yes, of course, all living things fear death. But I don't fear you yourself." He just hadn't been sure of the safety of touching her. As much as he wanted to aid her, he needed to keep what strength his older body had to care for his own. Call it greed, call it selfishness, it was the way things were, and he didn't think much on it.
"I wanted to do something." He deadpanned, afraid he had no better proclamation. He shuffled a bit, putting the very tips pf his toes just at the line where the dead grass faded to live. Would he too wither, crossing over that line? Or could he be swift enough to offer a friendly pat or nudge? He was mere feet from her now, and he seemed to wait for permission, or advice to remain away.
She smiled gently at him, the grass a foot around her now black and dead. "It's alright... Only the plants shrivel in my presence. I may touch mortals, and be near them... Just not for a prolonged period of time... Unless I wish to, of course... But it is alright, Storyteller. I do not blame you for your caution... Your strength is needed to help others live. That is far more important than my comfort..."
She settled against the grass a bit, her ears twitching as she glanced down the slope to his "daughters". Youth was always so enchanting... "Your attempt has brightened me enough.... Thank you."
Bombei listened closely. Interesting that only the plants reacted so to her presence. He wondered why, though he didn't ask. Something else she said caught his interest, but it too he decided not to comment on. It wasn't his place to pry more than he had, curious though he might be. "Perhaps so, but knowing I can do both...Well I still want to." He let himself slide to be laying down, his front paws folded just so the wrists grazed against her, keeping his feet from pushing too hard at her shoulder. He was large, but beside her he was almost dainty, he realized with a laugh. He moved around to lay parallel to her, and he looked back to see how close they were in length. Of course the addition of her wings made him downright puny, but ah well. It was a nice change of pace.
"I don't like to see such sadness on kind faces," He explained, turning back 'round to face Posca. "If there's anything I can do, I'd like to..." And he didn't use grass this time to nudge her. Instead he tenatively used his nose, bumping the side of it to her shoulder. It was nothign more than a kindly gesture, meant to soothe and encourage her. Still, he paid close attention, should she show signs of disapproval.
Posca blinked at him a little, her pointed ears perked a bit. She almost recoiled from him... The only contact she had had in so long as from the lion that had tricked her... Used her for her powers. But his touch was much different from his, and after a moment she settled contently. A some what awkward smile crossed her maw, but she didn't seem to mind him being so close to her.
"...Thank you. This is... sweet of you. To care so much about someone you barely know. I'm sure the gods will bless you with a wonderful life, Storyteller..." She said his name and title fondly. She blinked a bit suddenly, black eyes widening a touch. Her head tilted to her stomach, which had just slightly moved. A kick? Already? She was silent for a moment, then smiled wider, her eyes sad but incredibly warmer. The proof of life made her anxiety lessen... She was afraid the cubs would be born sickly, with being in the womb of decay for so long... But at the moment she had a feeling that they would be quite strong.
Bombei was glad she had accepted his touch, though he held back from repeating the gesture. Too much of a good thing and whatnot. "I might barely know you, but that doesn't mean you're less of a being, or less worthy of being comforted. And I like to make you smile." He liked to make everyone smile. That was part of why he'd taken up the name of Storyteller in the beginning. "I don't need the gods' blessings for that. I'm content with the life I've got." It wasn't meant to be haughty, he simply didn't really think he needed such gifts when he already had so much.
He jumped a bit when Posca did, looking back at her rounded side. "It's early...they'll be strong, I think. Like new plants that grow out of the leaf litter on the jungle floor. They've got rich land for growing in." He laughed heartily at the slight joke. He hoped Posca wouldn't worry now, knowing her cubs were already fine. "I'm sure they'll grow to be the tallest trees in the jungle. That way you'll just have to look for them sticking up above all the rest to find them again."
The goddess stared at him for a few moments, unsure what to really say... That had to be one of the nicest things anyone had ever said to her. It was almost hearth wrenching... And she found herself wanting to return the kind words, but falling short. She had none to give, so instead she merely leaned her head forward to nudge him in return, though it was pretty much swallowed up by his thick mane. She laid down again, getting more comfortable beside him. The size of their bodies really weren't that much different, but it was her wings that made her feel so much bigger. She extended one and lifted it until it was above him, giving him a bit of shade from the sun.
It was quite comfortable then, now in the shade. And even though the grass was dieing, it was still soft to lay upon. "Thank you." She finally found the words. It seemed enough, and she was obviously at peace now.
