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 Posted: Mon Dec 22, 2008 9:34 pm
I just feel like sharing what just happened within the last hour. People have probably gone off like this before, but hey, it's my story right?
So I just had a massive discussion with my mother about me being a lesbian and having a girlfriend. This has been LONG overdue.. about a year overdue, so it was really good that we talked about everything. She kept saying how I shouldn't be stuck in this mind frame that I'm going to be gay forever and that one day I could very well be with a guy again. It angered me, her saying that, but because she doesn't understand (which she repeatedly told me) I guess it was fair enough. Also, told me I shouldn't blurt it all out because I might be with a man in the future to avoid "trouble".. she then also found out about everything bad that's happened to me at school/on the net.. etc.
She does however believe that 99% of teenagers go through the whole "having feelings for those of the same sex" and it's purely a puberty thing arrow opinions??
After all of it, I told her I'd had previous girlfriends before my current one, and she still likes my current gf now, so that's still a good thing! But yeah.. I'm really glad we talked about it all.
Sorry about the length of this! It was longer than I expected it to be lol.
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Posted: Mon Dec 22, 2008 10:21 pm
I don't think it has anything to do with puberty. Sure some girls might kiss others but none of them would date them and yeah... ^_^
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Frozen_Tears_Frozen_Fears
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Posted: Tue Dec 23, 2008 11:11 am
There's two points there I see that she is ignoring when she said them herself. One is what about the mind set that people think they will be straight forever? The other is, how many puberty teens were speaking out against the Prop 8 in California that caused such a national issue in the news for weeks and weeks, which actually had many celebrities speaking for gay rights?
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Posted: Wed Dec 24, 2008 2:51 am
Frozen_Tears_Frozen_Fears I don't think it has anything to do with puberty. Sure some girls might kiss others but none of them would date them and yeah... ^_^ Yeah I know.. I get the whole "people experiment during puberty" thing.. I think she just sees it as that's all it ever is for everyone who thinks they're gay. Annnooyyinnngggg confused
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Posted: Wed Dec 24, 2008 2:52 am
Drak of Paradise There's two points there I see that she is ignoring when she said them herself. One is what about the mind set that people think they will be straight forever? The other is, how many puberty teens were speaking out against the Prop 8 in California that caused such a national issue in the news for weeks and weeks, which actually had many celebrities speaking for gay rights? YES! POINT! RIGHT THERE! I should have said to her, well will you be straight forever? I could have snapped her badly lol. Yeah see if I mentioned the whole Prop 8 thing she would have said something along the lines of "well we don't live in America so I don't care what those people did.. it has nothing to do with you" la la la. My mother is quite annoying like that.
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Posted: Thu Dec 25, 2008 2:15 pm
that's good that you finally had the convo with her. it means she's coming along. If she sees that you're not faltering in your feelings, she'll begin to understand. parents can be complicated sometimes. they have all these plans made for your future, our wedding, their grandchildren. they see it as a loss to have a gay child, so they try to do what they can to save those visions. she should come around though. but yea, congrats on having that talk =]
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Posted: Thu Dec 25, 2008 4:01 pm
My mum said every girl goes through it, then she said i will turn out like this drug addicted relative and get ******** by some guy and have a kid then get married and all will be right crying
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Posted: Thu Dec 25, 2008 4:05 pm
KuroiTehLycan My mum said every girl goes through it, then she said i will turn out like this drug addicted relative and get ******** by some guy and have a kid then get married and all will be right crying
um... that doesn't sound like all right to me?
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Posted: Thu Dec 25, 2008 4:07 pm
same here, but she says it is how every girl who ever thought they had love for another girl is ment to live crying
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Posted: Thu Dec 25, 2008 5:58 pm
Oh dear! Well that doesn't sound too.. good. I dunno my mum is just in the mind set that I won't be like this forever and she's stuck on the whole "me marrying a boy and living happily ever after" vision. Quote: that's good that you finally had the convo with her. it means she's coming along. If she sees that you're not faltering in your feelings, she'll begin to understand. parents can be complicated sometimes. they have all these plans made for your future, our wedding, their grandchildren. they see it as a loss to have a gay child, so they try to do what they can to save those visions. she should come around though. but yea, congrats on having that talk =] Yeah that's pretty much about right lol. And her dreams would be crushed even further if she knew my sister was gay too! I think she would have a heart attack knowing her two only kids are both lesbians lol
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Posted: Mon Dec 29, 2008 11:42 pm
Megeegan Oh dear! Well that doesn't sound too.. good. I dunno my mum is just in the mind set that I won't be like this forever and she's stuck on the whole "me marrying a boy and living happily ever after" vision. Quote: that's good that you finally had the convo with her. it means she's coming along. If she sees that you're not faltering in your feelings, she'll begin to understand. parents can be complicated sometimes. they have all these plans made for your future, our wedding, their grandchildren. they see it as a loss to have a gay child, so they try to do what they can to save those visions. she should come around though. but yea, congrats on having that talk =] Yeah that's pretty much about right lol. And her dreams would be crushed even further if she knew my sister was gay too! I think she would have a heart attack knowing her two only kids are both lesbians lol
ack! i think that puts more pressure on your sister then, aye? but it shouldn't be like that. let her know that you can still have kids, and be in love. i mean, i'd rather be happy than be miserable just to impress my mother. i've already used up most of my life and self esteem doing that. the only thing is that i have the whole religious perspective against me. it's even harder than just basic misunderstanding of homosexuals. it's the whole "the bible says... pastor says..." it doesn't really matter what carla says, cos i just want to "rebel against the church" ...sorry, i went off there xD
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Posted: Tue Dec 30, 2008 12:46 am
Lost_Forever_Soul Megeegan Oh dear! Well that doesn't sound too.. good. I dunno my mum is just in the mind set that I won't be like this forever and she's stuck on the whole "me marrying a boy and living happily ever after" vision. Quote: that's good that you finally had the convo with her. it means she's coming along. If she sees that you're not faltering in your feelings, she'll begin to understand. parents can be complicated sometimes. they have all these plans made for your future, our wedding, their grandchildren. they see it as a loss to have a gay child, so they try to do what they can to save those visions. she should come around though. but yea, congrats on having that talk =] Yeah that's pretty much about right lol. And her dreams would be crushed even further if she knew my sister was gay too! I think she would have a heart attack knowing her two only kids are both lesbians lol
ack! i think that puts more pressure on your sister then, aye? but it shouldn't be like that. let her know that you can still have kids, and be in love. i mean, i'd rather be happy than be miserable just to impress my mother. i've already used up most of my life and self esteem doing that. the only thing is that i have the whole religious perspective against me. it's even harder than just basic misunderstanding of homosexuals. it's the whole "the bible says... pastor says..." it doesn't really matter what carla says, cos i just want to "rebel against the church" ...sorry, i went off there xDNo no it's okay lol. Nah it puts way more pressure on me because mum DOESN'T know about her. It's really annoying because I'm getting all of this heat from mum (even thought it's cooled off now) but before I copped a lot from her about it.. and Jen (sister) was kinda just .. there, watching, not doing anything. Came to a point where I begged her to tell her because I had a break down over it. So it wasn't nice! Yeah I get the religious thing.. both sides of my family are crazy religious, mum's side more so, but even my god father was a pastor and he left his church because they wanted to let in homosexuals and he was against it so he left confused
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Posted: Wed Dec 31, 2008 12:31 am
yea? oy, i know, i get stuff from my mum about "influencing" my sister. i mean, she likes boys, so it makes life a wee bit easier on me, cos i won't be to blame, but i dunno, she likes to copy me and it's scary. that makes sense though, you shouldn't be the only one under pressure. rather, you shouldn't be under pressure at all. maybe your sister is scared? i mean, if she sees all that you get for it. it'd be nice if she could stand up for you though.
oy, that's not good. sometimes i think religion complicates life. i mean, i have my own set of beliefs, sort of patches of different stuff, but it's still hard when you've got someone basically standing in front of an entire congregation, saying you're going to hell. i mean, an entire church full of people that think you're hell-bound. it's scary sometimes.
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Posted: Fri Jan 02, 2009 6:54 pm
Oh that's odd. But if she likes boys then I guess you have nothign to worry about? lol. At first my mum believed that my "new found friends" from last year "influenced me" into being gay. Because suddenly I had all these lesbian friends that I was hanging out with and next thing mum knows is I'm one of them lol.
Yeah I dunno, I think my sister just doesn't see the point in telling mum about her. Who knows if she ever will, maybe when she finally moves out or when she's 30 or something lol.
Yeah religion can suck big time. I mean, I believe that god exists and stuff.. but I don't want to follow it because he doesn't accept gay people?? My whole idea of it even complicates myself so I'm not really going to go into detail about what I think of it lol.
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Posted: Tue Jan 06, 2009 10:51 am
yea, that's what i'm thinking. ack, mum's and their "influence" for a while my mum thought it was tegan and sara's fault xD i discovered them before my coming out to myself and all that. after i sort of came to terms, a while later, i found out that they were gay. i didn't even know till then. but that's just my mum.
yea, God confuses me, too. i believe in God and all that, cos i grew up with it. but i make it my own. i try not to listen to what they tell me at church, it's like, ladeeda.
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