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LIH Guild Council Seat 1

Update (10/19/05):

The polls are closed. Congratulations to the winner, badloki.

Update (10/17/05):

Candidates have been reviewed and the final list is posted below. Voting will begin (hopefully) at 12:01am PST tomorrow, and last for one full day.

Qualified candidates:
xLaurelx
badloki
SyphaBelnades

Unqualified candidates:
SizeTwelveShoe (not enough posts in the guild, see announcement thread)


This thread serves as both the thread to post your application for candidacy and for the actual election voting. If you are interested in applying for the position, please post the following in this thread. Please make special note that you cannot run for more than one position in any given election.

1) Have you ever served as a crew member or captain of a guild?
2) Why are you interested in seeking this seat?
3) Write a short blurb on what you feel you could contribute to the guild council. What qualifies you as a potential Councilmember.

Take the time to look over the main Guild Council announcement. Review the rules for being deemed qualified.

All applications must be submitted before Sunday, October 16th, 9:00pm PST.

• Have you ever served as a crew member or captain of a guild?
  Yes indeedy. I am Captain of the Gaian Parents Guild, and I am a Crew member of the AYGGS. I have been in both of these positions since the GGN was made.
  
  
• Why are you interested in seeking this seat?
  I think I'd be able to be pretty helpful. I am mature, level headed, and objectional. I always tried to help out in LI when I could and I try to help in here as well by replying to threads. My general interest is to help people out with whatever knowledge and resources I have.
  
  
• Write a short blurb on what you feel you could contribute to the guild council. What qualifies you as a potential Councilmember.
  I have experience with helping people - especially in the areas of pregnancy and parenting. I am, by no means, an expert, but I think I am pretty knowledgable and have some good resources/experience at my disposal. I am also not afraid to state things as bluntly as possible to get a point across. I am interested in presenting FACTS and I try to shy away from being too biased.
  

For your convenience, I have bolded the parts of my post that are true.

1) Have you ever served as a crew member or captain of a guild?

I am the elected deity of the Peabody Pirates guild, and the New Peabody Pirates guild.
I also am, or was a member of the Theives and Democrats guild, Alcoholics Anonymous, Avengers of the Kilt, and I have AIDS.

2) Why are you interested in seeking this seat?

I have a very strong sense of civic duty. I realize that you shady looking Gaian characters are not capable of guiding some that is really easy to guide out of something that it is very easy to be guided out of. As such I feel that it is my right, duty and responsibility to fill this role for you.

3) Write a short blurb on what you feel you could contribute to the guild council. What qualifies you as a potential Councilmember.

I have many qualifications that make me better than everyone else. First of all, I can spontaneously combust myself. I can fly, shoot milk out of my nose, and I invented masturbation.

I cannot be swayed by special interest groups, because I'm really rich, and their money can't buy me. Like when I was filming this one movie, and we had this great scene where this guy would pop wheelies with a crane. But the producer told us that we didn't have the money to finish the scene, so I payed to finish the scene out of my own pocket.

Furthermore, as anyone who has seen me post in LI knows, I have accredited liscenses in medicine, fishing, and according to my lab coat gynecology. I also have PHDs in law, kinesthesiology, ice cream, and sex.

Accordin to federal law, it is now legal for me to hold public offices. And I have recieved notification that it may become state law as well.

I am truly the pinnacle of ingenuity, which this guild lacks. For example once when I was fishing I caught a fish. But as I was going to gut the fish, the saddened look in its eyes brought me to tears, I knew that there was no way that I could eat this poor creature. So we reached a compromise, where I gutted and stuffed him, and added a lame music box, and so I invented Billy the Singing Bass, which I made me millions of dollars. No other person in this forum can say that they made millions by looking at sad fish.

During the Reagan administration, I can safely say that I was not implicated in any scandals. I've never molested more than one choir boy, at once. I don't take candy from babies, although I do apply a being young tax, and then repossess their candy. I don't sleep with fat white house interns. I've never incriminated myself in a testimony. I have never killed a super hero, or Batman.

I have no traceable ties to the CIA, FBI, Canada, or the Reynolds Wrap company who intentionally makes inferior quality foil that doesn't block radio waves properly.

I have witnessed public lactation, and I am aware of its consequences and benefits, and how it can be harnessed for the good of the guild. Fund raisers, for example, and also as a substitute for suicide.

In conclusion, women suck.

Polls closed. The official winner is badloki. Thanks goes to those who ran for this seat.

Congrats smile