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 Posted: Sun Nov 30, 2008 6:02 pm
Dawn was fast approaching. Even after so many nights, Kenna could not get used to the warm, pressing feeling against her side. Or rather, she couldn't get used to how comfortable it felt; it seemed that while she'd enjoyed Zap's warmth before, or Azula's this was mildly different. It agitated her that she could not place her paw on just how or why it was different. Alas, she'd never been the type to question much of anything before and she wasn't about to start either.
Despite her lack of will to confront what ever it was that was there, tangible between them, it didn't seem like it was going to leave the more she ignored it. Regardless, things around her had offered her a distraction. She'd even had a dream, a few nights ago; within it, she'd seen Finar-si, the Goddess, however, the message of the dream had been muddled and the queen could not recall what had happened within it. All she knew was that it felt like a premonition of something. While she wasn't sure what that something was... she knew that it would happen soon enough. Her gut feeling was that the end was near, and no amount of looking away was going to change that.
She'd noticed the lack of faith in Ripuka, and as little as she'd seen of the old lioness, it bothered her deeply. If someone like Ripuka had lost her faith, there was something to be said about it all. Alas, it all served as merely minor distractions to her biggest conundrum, whom was peacefully (or at least he looked it, anyhow) asleep by her side. He'd taken up residence in her den, and since no one shared it with them but Zap (which he did rarely now since he was being used as a babysitter), no one had offered so much as a bad look. Kenna had come to notice how they'd gotten into the habit of curling up against (around, really) each other, and while any other time she'd have probably glared, the idea that someone was there willing to protect her, even if she didn't need it, was mildly... nice. It was new, all in all.
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Posted: Sun Nov 30, 2008 11:31 pm
Jiryan was quite used, in fact, to having a warm, pressing figure against his side. He was used to having several warm, pressing figures against his side. He and Tutside had been nearly inseparable, but he had had several sisters who were none too ashamed to crawl over to their brother in an attempt to find warmth in the middle of the night. He was used to the closeness, the comfort of body warmth, but even in his sleep he knew there was something mildly different about this variety.
He grumbled aloud in his sleep, mumbling something no doubt from his dreams. He never really remembered them, simply knew he had them. No doubt they were filled with visions of his parents and siblings, things from his past and other things weighing his conscience now. He had been living in the den with Kenna, and since their little talk, things really hadn't changed that drastically. No one really commented on the fact that Jiryan was almost always at her side, though he never really spoke to anyone, choosing to remain the silent guardian sort that walked along in her shadow. It was to Kenna that he owed his existence here, and it was her that provided him with the happiness he had in the strange land of his father's ancestors. It was kind of a mushy, gooshy revelation, he'd admit it, but it was the truth so, in the end, what could he really do?
A yawn cracked his jaws, his eyes peeking open slowly. Though dawn was not quite here, light was still filled his vision, and he shut them again quickly. "Nnn," he groaned, curling closer to the warm figure beside him in an attempt to ward off the lingering chill. He experimentally opened his eyes once more, blinking a few times, before he let them roll in the direction of the female at his side. "Morning," he drawled, sleep slurring his speech slightly, even as his mind tried to fight the haze left behind by sleep.
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Posted: Mon Dec 01, 2008 1:07 pm
When he yawned, the female drew herself away from the warmth of his form, though only momentarily, so she could stretch herself out on the floor of the den, her own mouth opened into a yawn, her tongue curling up as the queen stretched from the tip of her nose, to the tip of her tail. As soon as she was done, she curled herself back against him, and though had she been someone else it might've seemed as if she were seeking out warmth against the cool dawn air, it seemed to mean just a tad more.
"Not morning yet. S'night. It ain't ********' morning till the sun's high and out," it was not a snapped reply, by a long shot, but the gruff demeanour the female held about her might've made it seem like that to someone else, "Y'know, I had a weird dream. Been having them, actually, recurring... I think something's gonna happen soon," the way she spoke made it seem that the 'something' was probably not going to be 'nice'. Lifting her head from where she'd snuggled it against him, she frowned, her eyes narrowing; if anything, over time it had become clear that Kenna was no worry-wart. If she got worried, it was probably a good time to hightail it away from that particular place.
After a long round of silence, she turned to face him, her red eyes shinning in the semi darkness of the den, "I want cubs," she told him, blunt as always, though there was not an ounce of mirth in the words. It was no joke. It was no order either, but merely a statement, as if she were dramatically throwing the ball into his cort.
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Posted: Mon Dec 01, 2008 1:28 pm
"I don't know, I think it can't be night if it's so bright outside," he argued calmly, not even really bothered by the gruff answer he got, which would likely have made anyone else think she was being snappy and angry with them. True, there was no sun, but the sky wasn't altogether dark either. He just smirked and lay his head down on his paws again, curling his body closer to hers as she leaned back into it, ready to listen to whatever morning revelations he had for him.
"Well, you have been waiting for something, haven't you? Something, whether or not it's particularly good, is better than just wasting away here wondering isn't it?" he shifted his gaze to look at her where she'd snuggle against him, his lime eyes bright even in the faint light of morning. The fact that she was a little bothered (as much as she was going to show) worried him, because even in the short time he'd known her, it didn't seem like she was one to show when much of anything bothered her. Sure, he might be the first lion she allowed to see it, but that didn't make it any less worrisome.
He had just been about to turn his gaze back towards the horizon, where the sky was steadily brightening and signaling the rising of the sun, when he saw her red eyes turn to him with such purpose in them that he couldn't look away. Whatever he expected her to say, what came out of her maw was not it. His eyes widened, brows shooting up, though none of the typical stuttering one would associate with a surprised male in this sort of situation was present at all. "Cubs?" he asked cautiously, staring at her drastically different eyes with her own, leaning in a little closer. Sure, he'd agreed to wanting to mate her, to liking her, to a hundred things and he supposed eventually this was.. part of the deal. It still struck him off guard a bit. "I guess that makes sense," he muttered thoughtfully, brows going from raised to furrowed. But it was raising a hundred other questions in his head - would he be a good dad, what would his mother think, was he really that responsible? Of course, it never occurred to him to wonder if he wanted them with Kenna, it seemed his mind was fairly made up in that regard.
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Posted: Mon Dec 01, 2008 1:42 pm
A snort was his initial answer, "True enough," her words were meant to address both his first statements, however, she was not ready to face the day, and so thus, she was happy to call it night. Night meant she could remain tucked away till she was ready to go out. Morning meant she had to go out and address the world... see how Ripuka was doing and how the pride was fairing, even when she knew it did not fair all that good. Meanwhile, the shadow of the success the Rebels were having, just a small distance away from them loomed over her. She'd heard wind and rumours that all was well on that side and that the new Firekin flourished. Meanwhile, the true Firekin were facing extinction.
"I hate being idle. I hate not knowing, and I hate not being able to do anything," it was without a doubt, true. The female had become mildly agitated by the fact she'd been unable to solve, or even begin to address the problems at hand. After all, what was there to do? The liable solutions were not ones she could even begin to consider, and not doing anything would lead to their death. Damned, no matter what she did, "Cubs," she repeated after him, as if to leave terms clear. Kenna was aware she was blunt, and was mildly surprised he'd not been sent into near hysterics with her proposition. Then again, Ji was not the type to be sent into hysterics, and thus, she shouldn't have been surprised, "Actually, no it doesn't. I don't think it makes any sense, but who says it needs to make sense?" she shrugged her shoulders a bit before continuing, "In all honesty, I don't get you, and I'm sure you don't get me. I don't think we can make much sense outta each other, but fact is, I want cubs. I don't know why. And I don't know why now. I just do," and thus, she'd told him, blunt as ever, "I want cubs. And I want them with you. The rest... I'll sort out later."
A small twitch of her maw followed, "I think you told me that the whole 'one step at a time' was a good idea in some cases? Well then, one step at a time," after a moment, she pondered back on her words and continued, "I don't want a deal. I don't want your help either," in other words, she was trying to say (albeit awkwardly) that she basically wanted him to want them too. Not only to want them, but to want them with her.
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Posted: Mon Dec 01, 2008 1:58 pm
He didn't mind one bit if she wanted to hide here in the cave until she couldn't avoid the world any longer, even if she wouldn't call it hiding. He would sit here with her in the darkness of what had once been her cave but was undoubtedly their cave now and let her idle until it was obvious she had hidden herself away long enough. He really didn't mind.
"Well, you know that something is coming now, even if you're not quite sure what it is. That's a small step in the direction of something?" he shrugged at this, really not sure what it meant himself, but if it would make her feel even the smallest bit better about the things she had been dreaming, then maybe it would mean something to her.
What was more baffling to him, at the moment, was this sudden revelation and eagerness to have cubs. "Well, I didn't think you'd want them with anyone else," he waved a paw to gesture out at the pride, knowing full well that he was the only one here unrelated to her. She didn't know why she wanted to have cubs, but she wanted them, and he was conveniently here and involved with her in time for it to spark. Part of this made him wonder what greater powers put him on his course, but he simply shook his head in a bemused sort of way. "I'm not the sort to make a deal, you know that," he said with a soft sigh, turning his bright eyes to stare up at the ceiling of the den, as if it might give him an answer. He missed his family, having so many souls so close to him. He was comfortable here with Kenna, happy with her even, and could see himself staying whether or not his father ever appeared. He wanted to make her happy, which was no doubt what these cubs would do, but on top of that.. it would give him a family again. Growing up in a big family meant he missed it now.
"I miss having a family, you know," he said finally, as a matter-of-fact sort of statement, before he let his eyes drop back to hers.
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Posted: Mon Dec 01, 2008 2:16 pm
"Maybe," she murmured, though it was under her breath, as if she weren't entirely convinced. The queen didn't really bother to tell him what her dreams had been about though, as if not wishing to burden him with the revelation; that was something she would reserve for Ripuka most likely. Even if the older lioness was losing (or had lost, Kenna wasn't sure) her faith, she was still the best soul to turn to. Perhaps she was making a mountain out of an anthill, but something at the pit of her stomach told her she wasn't.
Her head turned to gaze towards the den opening, her eyes lidding over as the light filtered through the gap. Morning was eminent now, and with it came the responsibility of her title. What lots of fools did not even begin to comprehend was that with a title came the responsibility to carry it out correctly. It meant, in a way, having to put the pride and the well being of everyone there before her own. Her eyes left the opening and trailed the ceiling, following Ji's, as if indeed trying to find the answer there, "I know," she said, as if the fact she knew needed to be voiced out, in the same way she'd needed to voice out the fact she was indeed not looking for someone else, even if someone else HAD been available for the taking.
His final words were greeted with a sigh, "I know," and then he turned towards him, her expression grim, "I don't think you can call what I had a family. It was all strictly professional, and the only sister I really love is gone now," her eyes narrowed, and for a moment she glanced at the ground, at her paws, watching as her claws dug into the earth, "I would like a family. See what all the fuss is about," for now, that was as much as she was willing to admit.
Even that had taken a huge effort to voice.
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Posted: Mon Dec 01, 2008 2:26 pm
He realized now that what Kenna was voicing was taking a great deal of effort, and being who he was, his immediate reaction was to curl closer to her despite the fact that the attention her claws were giving the earth could easily be redirected into his flesh. He trusted her, though. His head butted gently against her neck, eyes partially shut. He was no stranger to physically consoling someone, though with Kenna it was always a question as to whether or not she really wanted it. Those cultural boundaries really did get in the way.
"If I don't do anything else," he said softly, not forcing her to look into his eyes as he leaned his head across her neck, "I'll give you a family. Everyone deserves to know what it feels like to be loved, in every way." He would never have made it through life without his family. Without his mother, or his fathers, or the horde of siblings he had. They were a pain at times, but they had always been his support. It hurt to know he might never see most of them again, but he was grown, and he had found somewhere else he was needed. The strong queen, with the pride's future resting on her shoulders, needed him more than she admitted - at least he believed so.
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Posted: Mon Dec 01, 2008 2:35 pm
The physical contact was welcomed; the thought that it was, was still rather surprising to her, but she'd soon learnt to push aside the notions and simply accept it. After all, Kenna was an individual the greatly valued her pleasure and happiness, for it came about oh-so rarely. That was why she'd okayed Ji's stay within the lands to begin with... he made her laugh, and that was something that no one else had managed. It was well worth getting a few weird looks from others in order to maintain.
"It's funny," she murmured as she flattened her ears back, "I'd never questioned what I had," her head leaned against him, her forehead against his body; it was a pose that clearly transmitted defeat. There were things that she'd always thought true... that had been... SHOULD have been the laws of life, and now they were being shaken, erased or corroded. Maybe that what she'd been bred into believing and that what she'd always thought to be true without so much as an ounce of hesitation was not what was meant to be, "I never questioned it," the defeat was clear in her voice as she leaned herself into him, closing her eyes.
While outside she could not allow herself to be seen like this, she was at least open enough with him to let him know she needed him. If not with words, then at least with actions.
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Posted: Mon Dec 01, 2008 2:43 pm
He simply nodded at her words, knowing what she meant but really having nothing to say. It was her revelation, her great realization, not his. He was here to support her, be the beam that she had never really realized she needed. She could lay it all on him in private so that in public, she was that little bit stronger, her shoulders that little bit straighter. He just knew that, without a doubt, he was never going to give her any reason to question what she had again.
As she leaned into him, her forehead pressed against his body, he raised his head to set it atop hers. He'd stay with her like this until she was done, until she could face her pride with that gruff demeanor that demanded respect. He'd be at her side, like always. He knew he'd always be there.
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