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 Posted: Sun Nov 16, 2008 11:29 am
I can't take life anymore, I want to give up and hide away. I thought I was strong enough for all this.
I thought I'd be okay.
I've stopped crying in my sleep the other day, but I don't feel any better.
I feel better when I'm with Joe as he seems to have and edge of reason for everything, but I don't know what I'm doing now.
I can be happy, but there's just this clouded of fear over me where ever I go, somethings going to go wrong.
Work's bad right now, I don't know how to handle it. College isn't much better, I know I've caught up but I feel so... out of reach. I don't think I'll find the end.
I've bit my lip again, it's only just healed as well. /=
I almost hit a guy on the way back from work the other day. Someone got shot the night before. .. /=
Like round the back of where I live. He was only 15 and he died. /= And this t**t shouted Freeze or I'll shoot and I just swung for him, no hesitation. S=
I only just managed to stop myself from touching him by jumping back. S=
I haven't had that much rage for a long time. /=
Oh I don't know.
Whats wrong with me?
I want to be happy again.
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Posted: Sun Nov 16, 2008 9:30 pm
Nix you are just really stressed out is all.
Life feels like it's coming at you from every side and you've probably never had to deal with this much of it all at once.
*hugs*
Just hold on tight and take some much needed you time, even if it's like a bath with some soothing music, bubbles and candle light, or a night time stroll through a park, that's safe of course!!
Just do something that involves you and only you.
Pamper yourself because you really sound like you need it.
Just take one thing at a time, it's going to make you sooo much stronger when you come out of this.
You'll look back and laugh because it won't seem that bad when you finally look over your shoulder.
For the rage...maybe some kickboxing classes! HAH!
wink I kid, I kid.
But really I completely understand where you are coming from, been there done that, ate a lot of junk food! razz
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