Welcome to Gaia! ::

The information from this booklet is by Geordie Belinsko, B.Sc.N, M.Ed. It is copyrighted 2002 by the Kelowna Child Care Society. I do not claim to own any of the information in this sticky. If you have issues with this sticky due to copyright or plagerism, please contact me via PM.

The point of this sticky is to be a "guide to recognizing developmental milestones and helping your child to achieve them."

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Table of Contents:

- Post 1: Introduction. <--- You are here
- Post 2: Author's note - how to use this booklet.
- Post 3: Why is it important to detect developmental delays as early as possible?
- Post 4: Building a lasting relationship with your child.
- Post 5: What should your child be doing at... 3 months?
- Post 6: What should your child be doing at... 6 months?
- Post 7: What should your child be doing at... 12 months?
- Post 8: What should your child be doing at... 18 months?
- Post 9: What should your child be doing at... 24 months?
- Post 10: What should your child be doing at... 30 months?
- Post 11: What should your child be doing at... 3 years?
- Post 12: What should your child be doing at... 4 years?
- Post 13: What should your child be doing at... 5 years?
- Post 14: Where to get help when you have questions or concerns.
- Post 15: Where you can get more information.
- Post 16: Reserved.

Why Is It Important to Detect Developmental Delays As Early As Possible?

An infant's brain begins to develop in pregnancy but continues to develop rapidly for the first few years after birth. This development continues during childhood but at a slower pace. At birth, the brain has about 100 billion nerve cells or "neurons." These neurons connect with one another in systems to enabhle a child to see, hear, think, move, feel, express emotions, and much more. These systems form and improve whenever a child has a sensory experience such as hearing different types of music or watching a mobile. Every experience a child encounters affects the way the brain is wired and provides the foundation for the brain's functioning throughout life.

The good news is that you can make a difference! Parents and others in the child's world control the amount and type of experiences a child receives.

Early detection of developmental delays allows you the chance to offer your child an environment that is rich in stimulation to allow optimum brain connections to occur. The environment you provide will help your child to reach his or her greatest potential in later life.

Understanding and Supporting Your Child's Temperament

Right from birth, each child is unique. A child is born with their own special style and way of faving the world. one of the most important jobs parents have is to figure out who their child is and value them for who they are.

Children learn about the world through their senses. Chidlren use all of their senses to learn, but each child will have a preferred way to learn. They may prefer to use touch or vision, or sound to get information.

Children also vary in:
- how intensely they respond to things.
- how active they are.
- how they interact with others.
- how they respond to change.
- how persistent or easily frustrated they are.

Being aware of these traits helps parents understand their child's temperament and how their child interacts with the world. Most children fit into one of these 3 temperament styles: adaptable, cautious, and feisty. It is important to remember that not all children fit into one style, but may have traits from all 3 styles. There is no right or wrong way for a child to be. If you try to understand and value your child's style, it will likely have a positive impact on his/her development and relationship with you. If you adapt to their style (rather than make them adapt to your style), you will build a closer relationship with your child and help them fit into their world successfully.

Adaptable children approach new situations and people with ease. They seem to be more able to cope with changes in their routines.

Cautious children approach new situations and people very thoughtfully and sometimes fearfully. They may have difficulty with quick changes in routines. They often require extra support and time to feel safe in a new situation. You can prepare them for changes by talking about what may happen and helping them to feel able to handle things that come up.

Feisty children approach new situations and people with passion and intensity. They may have difficulty controlling their strong emotions and desires. They want action right away and may need support to calmly and slowly enter new situations. If you talk about changes before they happen, it helps them control their emotions and react in a less intense way.


Ways to Help Children Who React Strongly:

- Make the environment calmer (ex: turning off the TV).
- Set up bedtime routines to give time for them to wind down (ex: reading instead of active play).
- Show you understand them by accepting their feelings.
- Do not punish them for overreacting.
- Give them lots of warning before you change an activity.


Ways to Help Children Who Are Very Active:

- Offer lots of opportunities for safe, active exploration in a child-proofed home. Remove things you don't want touched.
- Accept that children need to move and will not stay in one spot for very long.
- Give them activities to help out at busy times, such as setting the table while you prepare dinner.


Ways to Help Children Who Are More Cautious:

- Respect their pace and let them look before they leap.
- Think of yourself as a secure home base.
- Be positive in your facial expression when you are in a new situation or meeting new people, as children take their cues from you (if you are afraid, they will be also).
- Try to prepare your child ahead of time when they are going to meet new people or enter a new environment.
- Establish routines so things are more predictable.


Ways to Help Children Who Are Easily Frustrated:

- Help them pace themselves when frustration is building. This may mean a break from a task or some help in completing the task.
- If they have difficulty waiting for something, talk them through what you are doing in order to get it for them.
- Model a sense of humor when things do not work out.

What Should Your Child Be Doing At... 6 Months?

A 6 Month Old Baby Generally:

- Turns head towards a sound or movement.
- Looks at people and/or objects for long periods.
- Responds to his/her own name.
- Makes sounds of pleasure and displeasure.
- Babbles using sounds such as ba, da, ma, ga.
- Lifts leg and grasps one foot in play. May bring foot to mouth.
- Sits unsupported or by leaning forward on hands. Is able to turn head from side to side when sitting.
- Can roll from front to back and usually back to front.
- Lifts head and chest up supported on extended arms while lying on stomach.
- Will bear weight on feet and bounce up and down when held in a standing position on a hard surface.
- Will reach out and grasp an object while lying on back.
- Will transfer an object from one hand to the other.
- May touch or rub own genitals while diapers are being changed.
- Male may have an erection.
- Is friendly with strangers but may show some shyness if parent is out of sight.
- Will smile at its image in a mirror.
- Responds to caregiver's emotions.
- Likes to play interactive games such as peek-a-boo.


Concerns May Arise If Most Of the Time, Your Baby:

- Does not engage in vocal play.
- Fails to turn head toward a sound.
- Is unusually fearful of movement or being off the ground.
- Does not have a spontaneous smile.
- Consistently has difficulty self-soothing.
- Turns away when you attempt to play with them.
- Does not hold head in the middle, looking up while on back.
- Does not follow a close, slow moving object with their eyes.
- Holds thumb clenched in palm.
- Turns head away or tilts head in order to see something in front of them.


Good Things to Do:

- Talk to your baby when you ar doing activities such as feeding, changing diapers, or dressing. Tell your child what you are doing, but keep your language simple.
- Imitate the babbling sounds your child is making.
- Have conversations with your baby and wait for a reply with the sounds they can make.
- Call out baby's name as you come into a room. Give them time to find you before picking them up.
- Give baby practice in sitting up by propping with pillows. For short periods of time, lean baby forward supported with extended arms and hands.
- Hold a rattle a small distance away from baby's hand and let baby reach for it.
- Play games such as "This little piggy", waiting for a few seconds before you complete the rhyme "...all the way home" so baby waits for the ending.
- Let baby play in front of a safe mirror.
- Provide baby with a safe environment to crawl and pull to stand.
- Let your baby watch you blow bubbles while you say "b b bubbles".
- Tell your baby the sounds they are hearing. "Telephone is ringing", "garbage truck", etc.
- Sing songs, and listen to music with your baby.

What Should Your Child Be Doing At... 18 months? [1.5 years]

An 18 Month Old Child Generally:

- Understands simple directions such as "Give it to me" and "Show me your nose?"
- Will point to simple body parts and clothing on request.
- Is interested in watching others do bathroom functions.
- Is interested in own feces.
- Explores own body with curiousity and pleasure, including genitals.
- Produces jargon - like speech, which sounds like talking without using real words.
- Uses 10 - 20 single words spontaneously.
- Will ask questions using a single word with a rising pitch of voice.
- Will look at what you are talking about. Takes turns in language.
- Walks with feet slightly apart. Does not need to hold upper arms out to balance.
- Squats to pick up toy from the floor and rises again without help.
- Climbs onto an adult chair.
- Throws a small ball.
- Walks up and down stairs with one hand held.
- Explores environment energetically, returning to parent as their secure base.
- May alternate between clinging to parent and pushing away.
- May throw a temper tantrum when tired or upset.


Concerns May Arise If Most Of the Time, Your Child:

- Walks with feet greatly pointed in or out.
- Walks with feet rolling over inward.
- Prefers to mouth objects instead of exploring them in other ways.
- Does not understand or respond to familiar words.
- Uses gestures rather than words to indicate wants.
- Refuses to leave parent's side and demands constant attention.
- Does not respond to voices but panics at some sounds.
- Takes adult's finger to point or uses the adult's hand as a tool.
- Does not try to get help from others by pulling at an adult's clothes or hand.


Good Things to Do:

- Have the child spend some time with other children of similar age.
- Expand on what your child says (ex: "doggie" - "Yes that is a big dog").
- Ask questions such as "Where is your nose?" and "Where is Daddy?" Help them with the answer if they need it.
- Give your child time to feed self with a spoon and drink from a cup.
- Make your home safe for your child to explore and learn without hearing "no" all the time from you.
- Let your child help when it is time to undress saying "Take off your socks." You may have to partially pull off the socks at first for them to succeed.
- Spend as much time as you can reading to your child. Give your child their own books to look at.
- Make a special book using picures of people and things the child knows. Get them to name or point to specific pictures.

What Should Your Child Be Doing At... 30 Months? [2.5 years]

A 30 Month Old Child Generally:

- Pretends to take different roles.
- Watches other children play and occasionally joins in for a few minutes.
- Jumps with two feet together from a bottom step.
- Balances on one foot for a moment.
- Turns pages of a picture book - one page at a time.
- Speaks using a minimum of 2 - 3 word sentences.
- Begins to use pronouns (ex: he, she) correctly.
- Sings some nursery rhymes.
- Answers "what", "where", and "yes/no" questions.
- Names most body parts.
- Understands the use of simple objects.


Concerns May Arise If Most Of the Time, Your Child:

- Does not answer "yes" and "no" questions.
- Does not put 2 or 3 words together in a sentence.
- Turns up the volume of the TV when watching.
- Has difficulty copying a task with their body or in learning self-care activities.
- Is very uncoordinated or clumsy, falls a lot, or walks into objects.
- Shows no interest in other children's play.
- Spends a great deal of time watching other children play but does not join in or seems to notice other children when they are playing.
- Does not use one object to represent another object (ex: pretending a block is a cup of tea).


Good Things to Do:

- Continue to talk to your child about what you or they are doing, but use a few more words than your child is using. When your child says, "Daddy go car", say "Yes, Daddy is going in the car."
- Play singing games, such as 'Ring Around the Rosie', but stop before the ending to let your child put in the last few words "fall down."
- Provide blocks of varying sizes to build and stack. Ask them to build a simple form after you have built it first.
- Play action games with directions to imitate actions such as "Put your hands up high" or "Touch your head."
- Talk about one or two colours with your child, such as red and blue, and point them out in things you see (ex: "There is a red ball") or ask "Where is the red ball?" Add more colours, when the child is able to pick out red and blue.
- Give time for drawing and colouring on paper. When finished ask your child to tell you about the drawing.
- Offer puzzles with 4+ pieces, as they are able to do them.
- Set up the house so your child can do more things independently (ex: a stool at the sink provides washing hands with supervision).
- Help your child to problem-solve by asking "I wonder what would happen if..."
- Allow your child to try safe things on their own even when you know you can do it faster.

What Should Your Child Be Doing At... 4 Years? [48 months]

A 4 Year Old Child Generally:

- Can carry out simple two step directions, such as "Get the ball and throw it to the dog."
- Tells simple stories.
- Has speech almost 100% understandable.
- Speaks in sentences (may have some grammar errors).
- Walks alone up and down stairs one foot to each step.
- Balances on one foot for at least 3 seconds.
- Stands with feet together and eyes closed without falling.
- Walks along a line on the floor with both feet on the line.
- Can catch a large ball with two hands.
- Uses scissors well.
- Is able to thread small beads on a showlace.
- Draws a simple person with 3 parts.
- Can copy vertical and horizontal lines, as well as "O" and "+".
- Learns to use buttons.
- Is more independent and strong-willed.
- Shows sense of humor in talk and activities.
- Favors make-believe play and dressing-up.
- Likes to build with materials when out-of-doors.
- Shows concern or sympathy for younger siblings or playmates in distress.
- Will help another child when asked by an adult.
- Asks others to play and can start conversations with other children.
- Eats well with fork and spoon.
- Draws people and objects.


Concerns May Arise If Most Of the Time, Your Child:

- Is not understandable by others unfamiliar with the child.
- Is unable to follow two part directions.
- Continues to use short and/or simple phrases.
- Inappropriately imitates speech by repeating back only the words said to them.
- Does not like to use crayons or pencils, or has difficulty holding a pencil.
- Has difficulty imitating a simple structure with blocks or simple body postures.
- Strongly dislikes fine motor activities (such as threading beads on a string).
- Avoids difficult motor activities.
- Seems not to notice, or does not feel sorry when they hurt someone.
- Hurts animals or others on purpose.
- Uses threats or bribery to force others to take their clothes off, play doctor, or touch their genitals.
- Reacts to discipline with aggression.


Good Things to Do:

- Involve your child when making a decision about a problem that involves them (ex: what to do if their shoes are left at preschool).
- Ask questions about how things work (ex: "How do planes stay in the air?").
- Give choices (ex: what they want to wear or eat). Keep choices simple by giving them a choice between two things, and honor their choices.
- Allow time to run, jump and climb every day.
- Use favourite stories and set up a play for your child to act.
- Make up stories with your child and write them down to read together.
- Get your child involved in group play with other children.
- Go on walks and talk about the things that you see. Use sticks and other items you collect to make a picture.
- Talk about different feelings such as happy, sad, angry, and frustrated. Make masks that show those feelings. Use the masks to talk about when you might have those feelings.
- Provide opportunities to draw and talk about your child's drawings.

Where To Get Help When You Have Questions Or Concerns

**Please note: The services here are listed for the of Kelowna, in the province of BC, in the country of Canada. Obviously services in the US or other countries might vary. If you live in or near Kelowna and can benefit from these, then that's great - otherwise, use this post as an idea of where to look for services near you. 3nodding

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If you live in a community other than Kelowna, services may be different or they may be offered at different locations than listed here. It may be helpful to start your search with these resources if they are available.


Family Physician

If you have a family doctor, this would be the first place to start. Tell your doctor about any concerns you may have about your child's development. The doctor needs input from you so that he or she will be able to refer you to an appropriate service that will be able to help you, such as a pediatrician.


Public Health Nurse

The Public Health Nurse can answer many of your questions about development, and can do a developmental screening on your child if they are under the age of 5. The nurse can tell you if your child needs to be referred to a service for further assessment. You can reach a public health nurse by phoning one of the 3 public health units: Kelowna, Rutland, or Westbank. These phone numbers are listed in the blue pages of the phonebook under 'Health Authorities.'


Infant Development Program

The Central Okanagan Child Development Association offers this service for families with children under the age of 3. The children who are seen by Infant Development Consultants may be at risk for delay or are showing a delay in one or all of the major skill areas. A formal Gesell Developmental Assessment can be given if needed.

A referral can be made directly by a parent, physician, public health nurse, or any other professional with the family's verbal consent. This service can be found in the white pages of the phone book.


Vision Services

Parents can have their child's vision tested by phoning an optometrist in the yellow pages of the phone book.


Speech Language Pathologist

If you have questions about your child's speech or language development, you can contact a speech language pathologist. A referral can be made directly by a parent, physician, public health nurse or another professional with the family's verbal consent.

Services can be found out:

1) Central Okanagan Child Development Association.
2) Public health unit.
3) Kelowna General Hospital Outpatient Department.
4) Or by phoning one of the speech language pathologists in private practice under 'Speech and Hearing Therapy' in the yellow pages of the phone book.


Audiologist Services (Hearing):

These services provide a hearing test for children at risk for hearing difficulties, or who are having problems in language skills which may be due to a hearing problem. If you have questions about your child's hearing, you can contact an audiologist.

Services can be found at:

1) Public health unit.
2) Or by phoning one of the audiologists in private practice under 'Audiologist' in the yellow pages of the phone book.


Physiotherapy and Occupational Therapy Services

These services provide assessment and treatment for children with motor delays, physical disabilities and sensory integration difficulties. A parent can phone if they have questions about their child's motor development, or refer a child directly for services. A family doctor or other professionals such as the Infant Development Consultant may also refer the child to this service.

Services can be found at:

1) Central Okanagan Development Center.
2) Kelowna General Hospital Outpatients Department.
3) Or by phoning one of the physiotherapists or occupational therapists in private practice under 'Physiotherapy' in the yellow pages of the phone book.


Behavioral Service

Parents who are finding their child's behavior difficult can go many different routes to find services.

Services can be found at:

1) A family physician who may decide to refer to a pediatrician, child psychiatrist, or a counsellor through Child and Youth Mental Health.
2) Publich health nurse.
3) Child and Youth Mental Health Services who will assess and refer your child to a Child and Youth Counsellor, or Child Psychiatrist. This service can be found in the blue pages of the phone book under Government of BC --> Mental Health Services --> Children.
4) Behavioral Consultants through the Central Okanagan Child Development Center's Supported Childcare Program. (Listed in the white pages of the phone book.)
5) Psychologists who can provide therapy as well as psychoeducational testing for school entry. These services are located under 'Psychologist' in the yellow pages of the phone book.
6) Counselling Services and Behavioral Consultants in private practice can also be found under 'Counsellors' in the yellow pages of the phone book.