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Reply Poetry_____________________________Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue >_<
Poetry By Mae-Sama

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Do You Like My Poetry?
  Yes, very much so
  No, go read a damn book
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WalkingDeath0520

PostPosted: Mon Nov 10, 2008 7:32 pm


I have this one on the front page of my Guild. I wrote it last year.

Like Burns on a Page

the candle light i cant see is burring me, but i cant feel, all i can do is stare into a light i cant see, the touch of fire like a hand, love it burns us but we thrive on it, on love and pain, but eventually there is nothing to burn, like a page time runs but, why do we thrive on pain pain burn love, why? but time for me has stood by the pain i feel from you, why? i love you burns me faster, tell the people the name of the one who burns you, your name is...
 
PostPosted: Fri Dec 05, 2008 4:07 pm


Grammar please. Xl And spell-check. surprised

Other than that, it looks good. sweatdrop

Although it almost pisses me off that you're using such an over-used analogy for love like fire. Xl What about an element for instance that binds with another one or something? <,<;

The only thing that saves it in my opinion has to do with the analogy about the book.

Edit: By the way, you definitely have potential.

HolyDemonAndy

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Poetry_____________________________Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue >_<

 
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