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Some of you may have seen this before but I have only had about 2 reviews on it in our friendly original prose forum so I'm gonna post it here.

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May 19th 1917
In hindsight, I should have never explored that ruin. Its winding, subterranean passageways wore too strong on me, and I broke down. Down into the musty bowels of the earth I descended, foolish curiosity dripping thick off my soul like so much cream from a spatula, settling in great puddles of ooze on the floor. I explored for hours, leaving only one door closed. It had strange, golden markings on it, and it frightened me. I opened all the others, exploring them until finally my lack of sleep overwhelmed my caution and I flung open the gold-marked door. I wish I hadn’t. When the passage was clear, I saw naught but inky blackness. I looked into the dark room for a moment, waiting for my eyes to adjust. Suddenly, pure, shrieking doom flew out of the chamber and slammed me into the wall, knocking the wind out of me. I passed out. When I came to, I had fallen into a screaming vortex of agonizing pain, my body rotting from within.

May 22nd, 1917
These last words are anguish, as I sit here, in my room overlooking the dig, in my gnarled and rotting hands a quill and book to record my thoughts. Even now the torturous throbbing in my body seeks to consume my mind and it is only through strength of will that I continue. .

May 24th 1917
As I sink further and further from reality I find my thoughts wander. Sometimes death, sometimes the dig, sometimes bleak nothingness. But most often is the thought of the time before I came here, to Irem, the City of Pillars. The time before this unimaginable suffering, slowly solidifying my organs, only to dissolve into dust inside of me. Yet, thanks to some horrific eldritch magic, I remain alive until there is nothing left of me but a husk. How I long for the time before Irem. How I long for happiness. How I long for death. .

May 27th 1917
I fear I am nearly gone. I only hope this diary is never found. .

Well the descriptions are good - but the story leaves me very confused. I have no clue about what is going on or what he discovered.. or anything. It's really just a random diary entry.

It's a good start. But it really needs some work. Is it meant to be finished?

Were it I, i would add some previous diary entrys.

I read a horror story like this one, where this guy is being forced to work, then he gets a certifictae for "realease" and then you realize it's a death certficate.

>.> That would put a damper on things wouldn't it?

I agree that it needs more detail on who this guy/gal is and where they are. It's a bit hard for the reader to feel sympathetic about a mysterious blob of a person. But the description you have is really good and you shouldn't quit on what you have of this story.