Sitting there and looking out over a cliff at the world that the Kitsu lived in, Parisa was thinking about things, it had been almost a year since she arrived here, keeping to herself, not wanting anyone to talk to, still some what greiving over her loss, she didnt WANT to be around anyone, not yet, she was happy staying by herself, not bothering anyone, still, regardless as it seemed to be, she needed someone, lately her biological clock had been playing up and the less she wanted it to the more it did. Lately she hadnt been caring much for the whole child thing, she didnt want to be a mother, she didnt want the risks it involved and most of all she didnt want the heartache again, not after what had happened.
To her, rigt now, children would be far to much work, if not a burden, she didnt want to think this way, being from a large family, she loved children since she had to raise her brothers and sisters by herself but still, she couldnt bare losing her family again, it was best if she just didnt have a family TO lose, much better for all involved then. Parisa sighed as she got up and turned away from the cliff and started to walk back down to the main lands, she wondered if there would even be anyone who remotely would like her even if she DID end up looking for someone, maybe a mate may not be TOO bad but children? that was something else entierly and se didnt want to go there.
She walked over to a near by lake and took a drink from it before laying down and just stearing at her reflectin in the water, carrying on thinking about things, Where was she to go? Stick around here or move on? She hadnt REALLY settled in since she got here and besides, what did the future hold for her? Mate? No mate? Children? No hildren? She has so many questions and yet only she could come up with the answers. She missed her mother terribly, she used to always be able to go to her with questions and problems and yet now, being alone, she couldnt she missed her mother and the rest of her family greatly and she couldnt even turn to any of them, right now moving on seemed best, maybe she could, some day, settle down for good, right now that just seemed far to much like a dream.
