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 Posted: Wed Oct 08, 2008 6:25 pm
Probably the first straight forward title I've had.....
Dark wings, black as night,
Dipped in oil, and burned dry.
Faint whispers of salvation
Screaming warnings of damnation
Holy beads that scar human flesh
Splinters that drive deep into the heart
Stop haunting me
Stop calling me
Stop drawing me further
Further into desperate pleasures
Further into twisted needs
Further into instability
The soft beat of your heart against my ear
Destroyed by sweet lies of tomorrow
Carefully tearing my heart away
Peeling away my pride
Yet still I stand
Faithful to the darkness of self
Don’t leave me
Don’t stop this
Don’t let me remember tomorrow
Dark Angels press against me
Fallen to beauty
So kind that it’s cruel
Slight touches and the sensations
Release my mind
Let me forget
Tempt my heart no more
Or finish killing my soul
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Posted: Fri Oct 10, 2008 9:30 am
And yet all I can thin about is Jessica Alba.
Perhaps your title is too straight forward.
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Posted: Sun Oct 12, 2008 12:35 pm
I think it's too straight forward too. Changing styles never works, it's almost as bad as if I tried to write something light and happy.
I think Haven would be a better title.
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Posted: Mon Oct 13, 2008 3:46 am
...........
"Haven"...
....yeah... >.> (lost in thought)
i accually really like this one... really it seems really... different somehow, from your other works. razz
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Posted: Mon Oct 13, 2008 6:29 am
I can't tell if he's being sarcastic or not....
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Posted: Mon Oct 13, 2008 12:14 pm
rinalla I can't tell if he's being sarcastic or not.... thats cause i'm not being sarcastic. :/
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Posted: Mon Oct 13, 2008 1:51 pm
I don't think it's that different then anything else I write... Maybe a little direct, but not lighter or anything.
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Posted: Sun Oct 19, 2008 12:07 am
i never claimed it was "lighter or anything". i just said it was different. neutral
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Posted: Sat Dec 27, 2008 6:52 pm
different or not, personally I like it. I tend to like most of your stuff its very graphic and helps to paint a clear picture, so clear I think I'll draw from your influence. Thank you !
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