Welcome to Gaia! ::

It's true. Women have the same hormones and desires as men, men are just usually more open about it. I mean, how many times do you CATCH a woman checking out a man versus a man checking out a woman? But yes, a guy who hasn't really dated before getting together with a girl who has been in a number of physical relationships will probably end up getting pressured into sex to make his girlfriend happy. This is why it's important, no matter your gender or sexual orientation, to find someone whose values are close to your own. It's very difficult to do in high school or college because of the pressure to 'experiment' and find what 'feels good' but it CAN be done. Just choose carefully and prayerfully. xd

Pressure to have sex happens on both sides of a relationship. I think that, in general though, guys tend to be more dominant so they're the ones leading things, making them more likely to pressure someone. Not because they necessarily mean to, just because they're leading the whole ordeal.

Guys are also stupid enough to want to impress their friends. Sometimes they've already told the lie about getting in someone's pants, and need to follow through with it before everyone finds out otherwise. Guys, especially high school guys, brag about their sexual conquests, real or imagined. Boys are really dumb about sex. They learn about it fairly early (I mean, kids are looking up porn at 11 and 12 years old) and there's still that little leftover biological quirk that says to spread the seed far and wide. Some males just listen to it more than others.

I'm not getting into the dominance statement though. I'm sure you'll see more than enough couples with that girl who has her guy wrapped around her littler finger. Just as many as the guy who snaps his fingers and the girl jumps to. Girls are just louder about saying they're being pressured for sex. Guys don't really have too many other people to talk to about wanting to wait, because that makes them seem gay or weird. I'm sure that the pressure's even on both sides. Like in all other things, the louder voice gets the attention.

True facts! I think it's stupid that for most guys, their bragging rights come from the conquests they've made, even if it's at the expense of some poor girl's (or guy's) body. Which isn't to say that a girl plays no part in it. Certainly, it is unacceptable for anyone, boy or girl, to pressure anyone else into doing something they are not comfortable with, especially when it comes to sex. But I also think that there is a responsibility (not sure whose, maybe the parents') to educate their children to be able to protect themselves if the other person is adamant. Beyond physical self-defense I mean. People need to be taught that it is okay to say no, and that any reason to say no is a good one (on your period? okay. don't feel like it? even better. not ready? fine. husband or wife smells bad today? alrighty then.) They should be taught that whatever standards they have set for themselves regarding sex and a relationship should not be lowered for any reason. They should be taught that, in the event that their morals and values, and their honor, are being compromised, it is okay to speak up, first to their partner to make them aware of the situation, and also to someone who can support and help them if need be, and that, regardless of what happens, protecting oneself is a top priority.

There are too many people these days who are doing it for all the wrong reasons- mostly looking for love in all the wrong places. They need to be taught a better way.