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If what I have said offended you...

If what I have said offended you...

I'll get us started. This is a rather old journal entry I wrote. It's really long, so deal with it.

THE STORY OF PAUL, THE MEDIOCRE DINOSAUR SCIENTIST/HUNTER!!!
Paul was just your ordinary kid who dreamed of becoming a movie star. He studied acting techniques and researched famous actors on a daily basis. He spent so much time preparing to be an actor, that he miserably failed all of his classes in school and had to drop out. Paul took this as a blessing and decided to make the best of it. How did he do this, you're probably wondering. Well, he did what every 12-year-old-4th-grade-dropout-that-dreams-of-becoming-an-actor does in this situation: drugs! It was only a matter of time until he was discovered by a down-on-his-luck TV producer who desperately needed a new show to keep his job. His name was Morty and he ran into Paul while he was beating up an old lady for crack money. As Morty helped Paul in stealing the money, they hit off in no time and before you knew they were discussing all these crazy-a** stories that Paul had come up with while he was high. But one of his ideas stuck out from all the rest: a show about 2 guys that take everything to the extreme. Then they take that extreme to the next extreme! So after some thought, costume designing, casting (i.e., kidnapping), stealing from old ladies (again), and hard work, The Knuckleheads was made. Paul played the role of Knucklehead number 2 and thanks to his drug abuse, he had unlimited ideas of how to take the extreme even further. After 12 successful seasons, Paul became old news and Morty turned on him. Morty said that Paul was far too old for today's violence-addicted youth to enjoy. So, at ripe old age of 18, Paul was homeless and out of work yet again. After 2 years of odd jobs (and by that, I mean mostly whoring himself), Paul finally caught a break when he met Peter Wallis (one of his best customers later on down the road). Peter had this idea to bring entreprenuership to the public by going door to door and selling whatever they could get their hands on. In only 2 short months they became the greatest door-to-door salesmen duo known to all of Southern Burbank (which was weird considering the fact that they did all their selling in New York City). Times were good for Paul, he had everything he ever desired at the snap of his fingers. You name it, he had it: cars, women, money, real estate, fame (kinda), an illegal underground fighting ring for poor Cambodian orphans, more women, and even a solid gold statue of Granny from The Beverly Hillibillies (even though he never watched the show before). At the peak of their career, Paul suffered from a sudden on-the-job accident: he was stabbed 37 and a half times by Peter, who took all of Paul's stuff and ran the ******** up out of there. While he was in the hospital for his serious injuries, Paul met a convicted fellon who was wanted in 47 states, 2 subregions of Australia, all French provinces in Canada, and most of South America. He was covered in scars and burns, and more often than not was seen talking to the voices in his head or the voices in other people's heads. He went by many names, but there was only one that you can't deny: DERANGED HANK! Paul and HANK hit it off in no time (after HANK robbed him of his pain medicine and, on more than one occasion, cut the wire for his IV) and starting talking of their dreams of a new life. HANK wanted to enter the fascinating world of making useless stuff that no one would ever buy unless they were high or extremely bored. Most of HANK's ideas consisted of stealing s**t that people already owned or created, and then re-selling them after he put his own crazy-a** twist on them. With some help from Paul, HANK had the prototypes of his greatest invention under way and ready for sale. The product was fool-proof: Pet Grandmas! In no time at all, Paul was back on top. And with that same speed he was once again back-stabbed by his business partner (literally AND metaphorically). Paul finally decided that it was time to quit screwing around and start finding a real career. After that plan failed miserably, he then applied for a job as dinosaur scientist on an island 500 miles off the coast of Greenland (don't bother asking me why dinosaurs can handle such severely cold temperatures because I truly don't know (and I'm pretty sure they can't, but I really don't care (if they got a problem with that, then they should un-exstinct themselves and send me an angry e-mail (except the T-Rex (stupid ******** animal can't use it's hands for anything what-so-ever!))))). After a couple of screw-ups in the research lab, the dinosaur population became extremely over populated, broke free of their cages (and by that, I mean that SOMEONE left the cages unlocked a few too many times) and dinosaurs ran around everywhere raising all kinds of Hell. Paul was one of the only scientists left and had to rise up against them in the hopes of... well... you know... not dying.

NOTE: This story is violent and potentially offensive somewhere somehow. If you don't want to read it then don't. razz

As he walked down the street the young man watched a mother running with a child in her arms. He raised his rifle to his shoulder and fired, nailing her in the spine. She cried in pain as he walked by and entered a grocery store. He pulled a grenade from his belt, removed the pin, and threw it into an aisle. The grenade detonated wounding an elderly man and killing a small child accompanying him. The man approached his wounded victim. "Why are you doing this?", the old man asked. The young man replied, "Because you people are a virus that must be eliminated". He then put the gun to the old mans face and squeezed the trigger.

The alarm sounded, and the boy woke up. It was just another dream much like others he had experienced recently. The boy let out a sigh and got out of bed. He had been growing increasingly discouraged of the world. There was nothing he could do to motivate himself. All he saw was greed and hate. People were torturing the weak to make themselves feel better. People were blaming others for problems rather than taking responsibility for themselves. What did this world have that was good anymore?

He got dressed and walked down stairs to get some breakfast. As he walked to school he noticed a man being mugged. "Has this become the standard of society?" he wondered. It seemed more and more that there was no "right" or "wrong", just hate. School was just another day of idiots mocking each other and "tough" guys picking fights to look more impressive. Maybe when they do get a fight it will be a fight they can not escape. As he left for home a couple of guys cornered him at the school and beat him because they "did not like" him. When they were done he just went home to calm down.

When he neared the house he saw his dad on the porch cleaning his guns. That is when he decided he would go through with it. It seemed people had fun in the misery of others so he would have the time of his life then end it all. He was fed up with this world. The only way to save this world was to purge the evil from it. He wanted to purge the world and he felt like he was the one that would start the purification. He began writing up plans on how to go about this cleansing.

Over the next several months he worked at a grocery store in order to fund his plans. Over the next several months he made several tools for his quest. He made pipe bombs using pure explosive for one type, and explosive mixed with ball bearings for a type of "fragmentation grenade" effect. He put a band of blue electrical tape for the pure explosion, and a green band for the "frag grenade". Some small sandwich bags were filled with home made thermite and a strip of magnesium for a fuse for more fun. He made a harness with straps to hold the pipe bombs. He sewed pockets inside his coat to hold magazines of ammo and a couple boxes of ammo. He took his dads old 12 gauge shotgun and 9mm beretta and readied them for use. Finally he turned his harness into a bomb vest using a battery circuit as a detonator.

On the night before the shooting he snuck into the school. A shotgun wasn't easy to sneak into school so it would be better to hide the shotgun and recover it later. The school did not have any security cameras so he didn't need to worry too much about getting caught. He broke the lock to a door leading to the boiler room. It wasn't as likely to be noticed soon, and if it was noticed then it was unlikely that the nature of the visit would be known.

As he walked down the hall he contemplated where the best hiding place would be. He needed a place that was rarely checked, concealed the weapon well, and would be easy to retrieve from. He settled with hiding it behind a vending machine. His mind was made up. In the morning he would end it all. He went to bed early because he knew it would be the last night of sleep he would enjoy.

At 6 in the morning the alarm clock woke him from his slumber. Today was finally the day he was waiting for. The young man got dressed then geared up. He dawned the harness that would hold his pipe bombs. He slid full magazines and shotgun shells into the pockets of his jacket. He grabbed a lighter as well as a couple extras in case one broke. As a last minute touch a few molotov cocktails were prepared. A chain and padlock went around his waistline like a belt. Finally the beretta was checked to make sure it was cleaned and ready. When the examination was satisfactorily completed he chambered the first round, thumbed the safety on, and put it in a hip holster. His jacket was zipped up to conceal the beretta.

When he got to school he went to the back door. He used the chain and padlock to close the back door to prevent escape. He then walked through the front door. He saw a girl crying to her friends, and listened in on the conversation. Her boyfriend had broken up with her, and she wished that she could just die.

He walked up to her and said, "death will come to many". Confused, she looked into his cold lifeless eyes. She didn't know what he meant. Before she could say anything he slid the beretta from it's holster thumbing off the safety and placing a bullet right between her eyes. Her friends not quite comprehending what just happened looked at him. Two more shots fired off and the two of them dropped to the floor.

By now people were running to get away. He grabbed a green pipe bomb, lit the fuse, and threw it into the escaping crowd. Upon detonation there were screams of pain. He walked over to the lobby vending machines and retrieved the shotgun. He thumbed the safety back on and reholstered the beretta. The front door was now guarded so the students ran through the halls trying to get to the back door.

The shooter ran down the hall lighting another green pipe bomb and throwing it. The blast scared more people, but caused no injuries. The shooter then grabbed a molotov and threw it. He watched as a couple of students burst into flame. Shortly thereafter the fire suppression systems extinguished the flame. He shot the two burned students in the face with the shotgun. He then loaded a couple fresh shells and continued.

Students got to the back door only to find it locked. They started to disperse some going up stairs to the upper level, and others seeking refuge in the lower level class rooms.

As the shooter stopped at the history teachers class he tried to open the door, but it was locked. He took a blue pipe bomb and set it on the door handle. The blast destroyed the lock so he could kick the door open. He found four students cowering in the back with the teacher. He chucked a blue pipe bomb at them whos explosion killed them all. The sweep continued.

He got tho the science room which was also locked. Another blue pipe bomb was used to blow the door open. He saw the teacher with another 5 students. Another molotov was used to get a nice fire going. The shooter then shot the six people. He heard running in the hall so he ran out and shot the runner down. The shotgun was now empty so he reached for some shells when a couple of students appeared from around a corner and tried to be heroes by taking him down. The shooter dropped the shotgun and unholstered the beretta. The shooter shot the first attacker 3 times hitting him in the shoulder, in the sternum, and finally in the throat. The second person didn't back down so he shot 3 times. The first went wide. The second and third hit him in the third. He walked to the student and planted another bullet in his face to keep him down. The beretta was now empty so he loaded a fresh magazine then retrieved the shotgun for reloading.

As he neared the next room a window broke. He kicked the door open to see two students climb out the window. The floor was cleared so he climbed the stairs to continue his sweep.

Sirens were blaring. The police finally showed up. It didn't matter now though. The dead couldn't be brought back, and the survivors up stairs were blocked off from escape. There were still some time to have a little fun before they stormed the building.

Cries could be heard from the bathroom. The gunman took a green pipe bomb, lit it, and tossed it in the first bathroom. Screams were heard, and then silenced after the blast. He did the same to the second bathroom. He approached a classroom that was locked. He took a blue pipe bomb and blew the door open. Before the smoke could clear he was in the room taking aim. He fired twice killing 3 students.

The next room had 4 students. After shooting them he decided to liven things up a bit more. He bundled all the desks together and threw papers on it. He topped the stack off with his thermite pack. The fire burned furiously and spread fast. The shooter walked back into the hall.

"STOP!" a voiced yelled. The shooter turned around to see three cops aiming at him. The game was over. He placed his gun on the ground and put his arms in the air. The officers neared him keeping their guns trained on him. They were about to grab him when he put his hands together. The wires on his arms touched completing the circuit and detonating the vest killing the shooter and all 3 officers.

After 20 minutes of heartless killing it was all over. There was no final statement, no goodbyes, nothing. The results of the massacre were more gun laws, hatred towards the shooter, and an over all day of mourning. Life soon continued as it had before and nothing changed in the majority of the world.

If what I have said offended you...

If what I have said offended you...

Rest in peace...

...dirty blue.

Rest in peace...

...dirty blue.

You say you'd spare him now, but that's only because you haven't met this p***k in real life. Trust me, you'll learn.