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*Rated for... expressive language*

Ok, so, i was reading some Xena stuff on various websites, when i came across this site Lala's Xena: Warrior Princess episode reviews Yeah, i know, it's really old, but i like to hear other peoples thoughts on the episodes. Half way down the page was a seperate link containing the Authors' rant. I must say, i agree:

*Undecipherable hollerin' and cursin', grabbing couch pillows with my teeth, shaking head side to side until the stuffing flies out -- ack! ptooey! grabbing my Xena dollie, asking her 'why why why???' shaking my fist in the air and screaming 'it's not fair! TPTB are a bunch of tossers!' spitting furballs, head spinning 'round 360 degrees faster and faster, spewing pea soup green bile, until poof! I spontaneously combust*

How do you solve a problem like Yodoshi? Supposedly, his spirit is so bad, so evil, so powerful that the Japanese version of hell will have nothing to do with him. (Huh? What good is hell if it won't take evil spirits?) And despite Yodoshi's P.R., I don't see his evil and I don't buy it.
Nope.
No way.
No can do.
Especially in light of the Xenaverse's 'evil mojo' hall of fame: Julius Caesar, Khraftstar, Callisto, and that bad mamajama Alti. Yodoshi pales in comparison...fancy pants poseur!

Speaking of Alti...in Adventures in the Sin Trade 2, Xena had to 'die' in order to fight and kill Alti's spirit; she did just that and came back to life. However in FIN, Xena faces a much less powerful spirit (whom she defeats) and she cannot find a way to rejoin the land of the living. Am I supposed to believe Miss-I-have-contingency-plans-up-the-wazoo could only come up with dying as the only solution to this problem? Nonsense!

I pictured our grrls either riding off into the sunset or going down in a blaaaaaaze of glory -- as long as they were together, it didn't matter. Well, I'm 0 for 2 and boy, do I feel cheated! (Ya know, if I wanted a tragic love story about star-crossed lovers, I'd read Russian novelists.) What I dislike about many eps -- splitting up Xena and Gabrielle in the course of an ep -- is magnified million-fold in FIN.

I can't think of anything more heartbreakingly devastating than losing your lover and best friend. I'm sure the closing shot is supposed to quell my unease -- 'Look, ghosty Xena by Gabrielle's side!' Oh, Xena isn't reaaaally dead and Gabrielle isn't really allllllll alone, right? Well, I'm not gonna blow smoke up my own a**! Nothing will make me feel one whit better about Xena's death. Dead is DEAD.

I could understand and accept Xena's death given a plausible story. However, the story defies logic and is so full of plot holes that you could march a Mardi Gras parade through it. If that wasn't enough to stew yer juices, Mr. Tapert doesn't realize or chooses to ignore that ending the series where it began -- with redemption -- doesn't work. The series outgrew that theme long ago and his ending rings false in light of what's truly become the heart and soul of the series -- Xena and Gabrielle's relationship.

If Xena had to die, then why didn't she die for Gabrielle? A self-sacrificing death for her soulmate would've been in line with the behavior we associate with the grrls. Gabrielle sacrificed her life for Xena's in Sacrifice 2 (tackling Hope in the flaming maw). Instead, Xena dies for 40,000 strangers -- where's the romance in that?

Because this is the season finale, Xena's death has a finality to it that her numerous and previous deaths did not. I'm not holding out hope for Xena's resurrection -- she ain't a phoenix and she ain't cake mix (Gabrielle thoughtfully contemplating Xena's urn, "Maybe if I just add water and stir...")

The angst quotient and clarity of the ep would've improved greatly had the writers clued us into Xena's dilemma and let us watch her struggle.

I keep picturing Gabrielle talking to her pot, er, Xena -- and it breaks my heart!

Taking up Xena's warrior mantle is not a logical character progression for Gabrielle. Her path is that of a bard or healer. Here's what Gabrielle should do: retire to a vineyard by the sea and become a famous playwright. Save the warrior gig for the next life.

For the umpteenth time, the afterlife shows itself as a contradictory affair full of unreadable fine print, caveats, and geographic-specific rules. Since when do the rules of Japanese afterlife apply to Xena, a Greek? Since when does geography dictate death? What about an individual's faith and beliefs? Last time Xena died, she went to HEAVEN.

I'm sooooooo tired of seeing Xena die horrible deaths. The overkill is over-the-top.

Xena was a grieving, sloppy drunk teetering around town on non-sensible shoes minding her own business when an angry mob of villagers attacked her with pointy sticks, which caused her to drop and scatter Akemi's ashes. Being the tall dark angry chick she was, she torched a few of her tormentors who had the unfortunate reaction to run. This combined with a gusty wind, bad urban planning, and flammable housing materials (paper), started a fire that destroyed Higuchi and killed 40,000 people. This is a tragedy of circumstance and Xena is not solely accountable. There's a difference between accepting responsibility for one's part in a tragedy and taking the rap for everything, regardless, because you are wracked with guilt. Scapegoat-ism does not equal heroism.

Of course, Xena should make amends for her past actions, but dying in a blaze of masochistic glory is the selfish, drama queen's way out. Xena's repaid her debt by saving the village from repeat fiery demise and killing Yodoshi.

Xena unintentionally and accidentally kills 40,000 villagers and feels oh so guilty, but the thousands of troops in Chi'n she purposefully turned into stone soldier lawn gnomes -- she feels nada?

Harukata shmarukata. He makes it sound as if saving the city is chump change -- what a judgmental b*****d! And then he has the gall to blame Yodoshi's bad boy behavior and compulsive soul eating on Xena -- hello! Akemi killed Yodoshi and started this whole mess in the first place! How is it Xena's fault that the Japanese underworld is too scardey cat to take in Mr. Soul Sucky's spirit?

And what good is a ghost killer who can kill every ghost except for Yodoshi? Convenient plot device!

Xena doesn't tell Gabrielle the plan and the poor little bard has to stumble across Xena in the forest and have her happiness undercut by realizing Xena's dead and she was left out of the loop. Argh, this is so, Season 1...2...3...4...5...6

Why does Xena always get to battle the bad guy? *yawn* Why can't I see Gabrielle and Xena work together to defeat Yodoshi?

When Yodoshi died, the 40,000 imprisoned spirits were set free -- he's dead no matter what way you slice him and that's what matters most. Xena dead or alive is incidental. Why should the spirit's state of grace suddenly hinge on Xena?

And when was 'Xena must stay dead in order for the freed spirits to live in a state of grace' explained, let alone mentioned? How about never? All of a sudden, there's this bullshit, er, stipulation and Xena-in-the-flesh is a no go. Harukata of all people would've said something -- otherwise, why send Gabrielle on her futile mission to reconstitute Xena? (Personally, it's a conspiracy -- some malarkey that Akemi concocted to have Xena all to herself in the spirit world.)

Thank you for riding LaLa's Apoplectic Tirade-a-Whirl.


A bit long, i know, but what do you guys think?

I think "Here's what Gabrielle should do: retire to a vineyard by the sea and become a famous playwright. Save the warrior gig for the next life." was my favorite part.
xd

But yes!
I totally agreed with everything she said.
That episode was just terrible.
Stupidest way to end the series.
I mean, wtf.

WO! eek naw way that sounds almost more depressing whee xenas ashes AND chakram being lost? whee i didnt like gabby being deh next chakram masta tho. she shulda burnt it with xena 3nodding

well when she used it she waz all evil and fightin xena 3nodding but when gabby used it it waz like she waz replacin xena crying NO ONE CIN REPLACE XENA! crying

I thoroughly agree with that rant.

I want a Xena movie as well, but unfortunately we have no say in that sad

it's sad Xena had to die in the first place. That ending was just adding insult to injury.

I didnt like the reason she died. I didnt like that she wasnt in Greece. I didnt like a LOT of things about FIN but her death made perfect sense to me. It was a logical ending to the story of Xena. The show was about her path to redemption and what she was willing to do to find that forgiveness, is she hadnt died in the finale I would have been shocked.