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 Posted: Thu Aug 28, 2008 3:23 pm
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Her head was down, her eyes staring ahead. She looked absolutely sorrowful, and her stomach... was tense. She let out a sigh, her gaze and sense of smell searching out one scent in particular. It was time for secrets to come out. She had realized it not too long ago. If she kept this particular secret a secret more, the pride would notice some time. And she wasn't going to feel guilt for the months to come. Especially suspicion. Though, after mulling it over in her head, she knew the members would get suspicious anyways. That was what she was afraid for. Hisia didn't want to be pushed away for what had happened, and now that she knew what had been going on, she felt empty, actually. Samahani was dead, the brutal fight had taken his life.
Thus she felt partly empty inside.
With a sigh, Hisia sat down, head raised down to rest on her shoulders. A single tear ran down her cheek, falling. She knew how hard it would be to tell the one she was close to this. She was afraid, shamefully, how she would react. Ficha wasn't very lenient when she had confronted her. Now how would the lioness react to this? Not well, she thought, letting out another sigh. Dread was slowly consuming her. Questions roared at her, varies of sadness continuing to eat away at her. Closing her eyes for a moment, she laid herself down, laying her head on her paws. Maybe Ficha would come, see her.
And she wouldn't be ready to face her sister. Except she knew deep down it needed to be brought up, before it was too late.
Before the signs finally did become noticeable, before everyone shunned her away.
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Posted: Fri Aug 29, 2008 7:40 pm
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Ficha had been busy, doing what Ukweli had asked, or rather, commanded, of her with his dying breath. She was aiding those who had lost hope, loved ones, and spirit in the earthquake and the perilous time after and in doing that, she was avoiding the problem that was tearing her apart inside. Her sister, one of three parts, had died. She had left behind her mate, her cubs, and the two sisters who had shared their first breaths with her. It ached to know that she was no longer in this world and this day Ficha had decided she was going to set aside for she and Hisia alone - she would not mourn Nyonda, she would remember her. She had spent little time with the solitary sibling she had left, more a twin now than a triplet, since Nyonda had passed into the afterlife without them.
It was Hisia's scent that she found on the air then, as those thoughts swirled about her head. She would have picked her pace up, had her wounds been better healed - the vultures had succeeded in reversing quite a bit of the healing they had managed while she was tucked away in that cave. She refused to lie down for long now, as well, especially with so many injured or hurt - she didn't push herself, but she refused to be useless a moment longer. "Hisia?" she called out, her teal eyes searching for the lioness she would have known anywhere. When they finally found her, she wasn't quite prepared for the sight.
A frown creased her maw, her steps faltering, before she finally made her snail's pace to her sister's side. She sat, slowly and uninvited, staring down at the face before her with a thousand questions swirling through her head. Finally, she simply settled on one: "what's wrong?"
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Posted: Fri Aug 29, 2008 8:05 pm
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Before she had time to think over her dreadful thoughts, a familiar voice filled her ears.- A voice she hadn't expected to hear. Her entire being tensed, especially her stomach, and she looked up at her sister's questioning gaze.
She felt weak under her gaze. A deep pit of fear swelled in her stomach, she felt empty. No words escaped her mouth for the next few moments, still trying to gather words together to apply Ficha the answer - though she wasn't wanting to tell her sister, not at all. A sigh escaped her throat, and she shook her head. She needed too. All of the lions that could find out, Hisia knew she could trust Ficha - even though her reaction might be... mad.
"I'm sorry," She whispered quietly, eyes tearing away from that teal gaze. She couldn't find the right words. "I... am so sorry." Tears blurred her vision. Never expecting to fall into such an emotional breakdown, her eyes suddenly glanced back towards Ficha's, and this time, though her stomach kept forming a deeper hole, and digging even more, her heart, the time, it was now-
"I'm... I'm pregnant." That was the only easy part to say, she thought with a flick of her tail. She still felt guilty, and as she stared at her sister's face, eyes, she let out another sigh, tears already streaming down her face.
"Msiba," Hisia's voice was hoarse and low, hardly able to speak while the tears rolled off her cheeks, "Msiba is the father."
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Posted: Sat Aug 30, 2008 8:55 am
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Ficha's first thought, as she confronted her fidgeting, emotional sister, was to wonder why the lioness was apologizing. Surely she could have done nothing wrong, she was too kind-hearted and sweet to lay a hand on a fly (interlopers aside, of course). The tears that streamed down her mirror image's face made no sense at all to the stern sister, her brows furrowing into a deep 'v' as she fought to figure out just what it was that had driven her sister into this state-of-mind. Then, of course, she heard those words fall past her maw. Pregnant? That wasn't the end, however, for she tacked on a name that was enough to set Ficha's blood boiling.
Instantly, Ficha's whole body went rigid, rock still. Her eyes narrowed onto her sister, though she said nothing for a long time. Her first thought was that her sister had lied to her - but then, she realized, that her sister hadn't really lied. She had simply withheld the truth. She had told her she had been spending time with Msiba, she had simply not added that it had been intimate time with him. Still, she couldn't help but feel that it was a very similar digression. Ficha's whole mind was screaming 'I told you so' silently at the lioness before her for a moment, but seeing her sister in such a fragile state, she knew better than to say the words out loud. That, and Ficha was a much more mature creature than her inward thoughts would make her out to be. "You should have told me, Hisia," she said slowly, averting her gaze to look out at the horizon. It was something she often did, looking away from those she was speaking to when she felt overwhelmed by something, even when her body did not give away even the smallest hint of it. She did not have to remind her sister of the warning she had given her, not now after everything had come to light about those damn snakes. "You should have listened."
A deep sigh spread out from her lungs as she finally turned her gaze back towards the last sister she had left in the world, the only family she had apart from the twins that still lived beneath Umoja's roof. She would have more family soon, it seemed, but the joy of that thought came with burden. "They will be treated much as Mapatano was, you do realize this, don't you?" Mapatano had been, well, tolerated more than anything. He suffered for the sins of his father, though she knew her sister had seen some good in him. She would be here for these cubs, she would treat them as she knew that Nyonda would, as much for Nyonda's memory as it was for the sake of both the cubs and her living sister as well. She frowned, staring down at her paws for a moment before she turned her eyes back up to meet the ones that matched them to perfection. "I'm not angry, Hisia," she said softly, "I only wish that you hadn't kept me in the dark - that you hadn't kept the pride in the dark."
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Posted: Sat Aug 30, 2008 2:24 pm
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She wasn't angry, Hisia realized. Though she did notice how she had gone still, completely still. And in that short amount of time, she wondered if she was angry, and holding back the roaring fury. She was right. She whisked her eyes shut, opening them as they slowly drifted down towards the ground. Shouldn't have kept them in the dark - but she couldn't help it. After realizing that she was pregnant, all she wanted to do was hide it, keep it hidden. She knew she wouldn't be able to hide it for long; after all, the sighs would show after time. Everyone would know, the signs would show. Her belly would start to become bigger, she would grow fat.
And everyone would know, except... they wouldn't know the father, until the cubs were born.
That's where she knew they would start treating the cubs like Mapatano. He suffered, and now she felt pain. Her cubs would most likely suffer just because of their father. "I've realized it," She murmured, shaking her head. "Though I will not believe they will end up like their father." They had their mother, a loving mother. A mother whom would bring good into their view. Good... that they won't be influenced by the whispers, glancing, of the pride. Even though she knew they might... Hisia looked away, letting out another sigh.
"I know, I shouldn't. But," The tears seemed to stop for a moment, as she drenched in the truth. Then her gaze lifted to stare at Ficha. "I couldn't help it. I realized it, I knew whom the father was-" She paused here, "And then I was afraid how everyone could react."
Hisia shook her head again.
"I've thought it over too much, and I decided you were the only one I could tell." She flicked her tail, the ache of her wounds, still healing, returning. "Everyone will know soon, the signs will show," She nodded slowly, feeling dread form in her stomach this time.
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Posted: Sat Aug 30, 2008 3:47 pm
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"I understand," she said slowly, though she knew she couldn't truly understand what Hisia felt. She knew that she was afraid, that she was scared what the pride would think when she bore the offspring of their most recent and dangerous enemy. She could understand it, see the logic in her feelings, but even then she knew that she would never fully realize what it felt like because she could not feel it for herself. "Except that if you lie to them, Hisia, if you do not tell them you are pregnant and you do not tell them who the father is, they will think very ill of you for it," she said softly, turning her wise eyes to stare at her sister, though she was staring at the ground. Her tail flicked behind her and the lioness leaned in, slowly to press her forehead against the mirror image of the last triplet she had left. "You can not keep this from them, you do understand me, don't you? If they find out afterwards, they could think ill of you and it will be worse for them." By them, she meant the cubs, for she did not wish any harm or ill intent upon them - quite the contrary.
She drew back, slowly, finding that though that position was comforting, being so close to her sister, it was not exactly comfortable given her wounds. She straightened her back instead, looking down at her saddened sister, watching her for a time in silence. She could not leave Hisia to face this alone, to face the hardships that would come from raising what would become this generation's Mapatano. Perhaps, during that time in the cave, she had become more like Nyonda while taking on her name than she had ever realized. She felt sorrow for the cubs, knowing that they would be introduced to a life of shunning, lest they prove themselves to be something else entirely separate from their father. It was in that instant that she vowed to show the pride tolerance, be there for both her sister and the cubs that she was now bearing against her will. Though she should have listened to Ficha more carefully than she had, Ficha could not blame her for these cubs, or the cubs themselves, for what Msiba had done. He had been quite the charmer, from what she had gathered.
"I will be here for you, Hisia," she said slowly, pointedly, to make sure that Hisia understood her. "I will be here for your cubs and I will help you make sure that they do not stray one foot off the path of light. There will be no trace of their father in them, nothing for the pride to frown upon, nothing for the pride to point at and judge them by." She shook her head as she said these words, as if to emphasize it, as if preaching already to those that would judge the little cubs simply because of the genes they had inherited. "I will be here for you," she said again, to make her point, straightening her back as she did so, the perfect symbol of stubborn pride, despite the wounds and scars that marred her form.
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Posted: Sat Aug 30, 2008 7:41 pm
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She was afraid, the emotion of fear growing across her face, her eyes, even her body went rigid from fear. She bit her lip, eyes dwindling on her sister's face before they flickered to the ground once more. She would have loved to deny it, deny the truth. Except she had been denying the truth for so long that, when the truth had finally slapped her, she came close to a near-death experience. Her eyes narrowed, remembering the lioness as she went after her. The death of Samahani- Then the raven, Mchawi's own raven, who was sweet, despite how cruel he had seemed to be when the interlopers first arrived. He had died by Hisia's own paws, and the lioness realized she was shaking.
Had Ficha gone through this?
She never noticed her own bonded when Hisia had dared to confront her. All she saw was Hakiki, Nyonda's own bonded. Feeling the same empty feeling she had felt when Samahani had first fallen, she shifted, sitting up, looking off in thought. She smiled softly, closing her eyes with warmness growing over the emptiness she felt. "Thank you," She murmured. "I don't know what I would do without you, Ficha." It was true. She didn't know how she could fair if both of her sisters had been taken, and with Ficha being the wiser of the three, she usually was the one who came to her about things.
Then she got to her other words, the sentences that made the lioness feel the same pit of dread grow again. "I know I can't avoid the suspicion, it's just... aside you, who could I tell? Umoja seems like a great choice, since he is the king." Hisia nodded slowly, actually liking the idea... Though how would he react if he found out she was pregnant? With Msiba's cubs, nonetheless.
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Posted: Sun Aug 31, 2008 11:57 am
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Ficha saw the shaking that was racking her sister's body and she had to wonder just what it was that caused it. The memory of the interlopers and what they had done? The thought of facing the future and realizing just how hard that would be? Or did it simply have something to do with Samahani? She had heard what had happened to him and she knew well the pain that came with losing a bonded. She and Hakiki had mourned together, she for her sister and her dead bonded, Hakiki for Nyonda alone. Even with a new bonded to replace Viapo so quickly, it had hurt, and it still hurt. She could have told her sister then that she would never get over it, that it would never heal, simply grow easier with time, but that was something that Hisia would have to learn on her own.
She glanced overhead, almost out of habit, to see if Hakiki had returned from the day's scouting out of the lands for other members of the pride yet. She knew it was too soon to hope and she wouldn't be at ease until the falcon was back at her side. She had lost one bonded, she was far too nervous with the second out of sight even now.
"Let's hope you never have to find out," she said softly as she turned her gaze back down towards her sister, her tail flickering hard behind her, though a smile spread across her maw. "I will never leave you if I can help it, that I promise," she vowed, bowing her head to her sister as she did so. She knew that Hisia was suffering much as she had suffered those many days alone in the cave, though she was wearing the pain out openly, just as Hisia had always done. So sweet, so innocent - it was no surprise that Ficha felt an overwhelming sense to protect her above all others. She had always seemed like the baby to Ficha and Nyonda, she was still the baby. She would never forgive Msiba for what he had done, the position he had put her in.
"Umoja would be a good start," she said with a nod, though her brows furrowed as she thought. "Though I think, perhaps, it would be a good idea to let it become common knowledge. I know you would like to keep it secret, but if you do that, the pride members may end up feeling.. betrayed. Tell those closest to you, let the word spread that way." She offered a sorrowful smile to her sister, for she knew that she would not want to do this, not at all, but Ficha knew that if the pride had to welcome the cubs with the knowledge of who their father was after they were born, bad feelings could be born. "Let them have time to adjust to it. If it will help you, I can tell Umoja for you. I know that you are.. fragile, right now." She was speaking, of course, of Samahani, and the betrayal by Msiba.
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Posted: Sun Aug 31, 2008 7:12 pm
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Telling everyone was a good idea, actually. She was, distantly, afraid of what the others might think, though it was better to let the secret spread before the cubs were born. If they were born, then the knowledge delivered that they were Msiba's cubs, how would everyone react? Not well, she thought. She wasn't about to let her cubs be treated like dirt, and though she knew they would be shunned on some level; at least they had a loving mother, a loving aunt. And she couldn't but smile at the thought, letting out a quiet sigh.
Hisia decided it was time for her to help the pride. It was time, and she stood up, tapping her claws rather anxiously on the ground. The painful ache of her wounds were still there, but now she was energized. She still felt sorrow, though that was partly gone. Fear still lingered deep within the pit of her stomach. She was nervous, telling the pride wasn't going to be easy.
But she could handle it.
Turning to Ficha, her expression was thankful. And even if there was sadness still gazing her teal gaze, she was finally starting to understand. Her stomach was tensing, visibly, and she turned her gaze away from Ficha, still deep in thought. "Thank you," She murmured once more, nodding. Even though she was still in a fragile state, she could handle. "But I can do it, Ficha. I know I'm still in a fragile state, but I will tell Umoja myself." She nodded again, to reassure her.
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Posted: Mon Sep 01, 2008 11:06 am
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As her sister's words rang clearly through her ears, Ficha felt an overwhelming sense of pride swell up in the depths of her heart. Somehow, to know that Hisia could find the courage to face their king and tell them the news herself, even in such a fragile state, after everything she had gone through, made her feel as if Hisia could truly do anything. There was a time not so long ago that she would not have thought Hisia capable of such strength and yet, here she was, proving to Ficha that even if she was not as strong physically, or perhaps not as bold, she was still as strong spiritually. She knew then that there was no better mother for these cubs, that there would be no one better suited to raise them. It was in that instant that she was proud to call her her 'sister'.
"I have all the faith in the world in you, Hisia," she said softly, endearingly, as she too pushed herself to her feet. She leaned in, for a solitary moment, to press her forehead against that of her sister's, remaining there for a time before she finally pulled away. Then, with what she hoped was the most encouraging face she could must, she gave her a nod and turned away, to leave her to her task. In the distance, she could hear Hakiki's call and that was where her heart was drawing her. She knew Hisia did not need her now, she wouldn't let her down.
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