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 Posted: Sun Jun 29, 2008 10:14 am
Bella had returned back to the plains. Raphe had sprouted and grown, was off living his own life. He still visited, he still checked up upon her, but he was a stallion all his own. . . . It seemed like only a short while ago she had found him abandoned by the river, lost and alone, very much like she had been when she was born. Ah, what strange twists and turns life often threw at a soquili . . . . . Perhaps the spirits had blessed her with Raphe knowing that her dearest friend would leave her; perhaps it was a gift as an apology for her own lonely beginnings.
Either way, Bella adored her son and would forever be blessed to call him such. But as lessons of motherhood hadn't come easily, perhaps it was letting them go and live their own lives that was the most difficult challenge. The cream mare found her afternoons quiet and shadowed - she could always return to Azu's grove and visit Moppet, which she tried to do more frequently, but that too harbored complications of their own.
Azumoth still hadn't returned and the mare found herself anxious. Anxious to know if he was still well, anxious to know what exactly was happening to him and if he was discovering everything he had to discover. Her thoughts weren't far from the stallion. . . . her friend.
And only her friend.
Though he had admitted his like to her before he had left, Bella had to stop and remind herself that it meant nothing more than what he had said - like. He liked her, nothing more, nothing less; and though she was appreciative of it a small, selfish part of Bella wished for something more. Such a frustrating, tangled web of emotions. But so long as she had him in her life, regardless how he looked upon her, she would be happy.
He was her friend. . .her only friend.
And she wouldn't give up such a thing for a world.
Swishing her curls, heaving a small sigh, the mare pushed her way through the embrace of the weeping willows of her own little grove. It had bloomed with the touch of spring and gave her comfort when alone. This was where Raphe had grown, and where she had taken Azu before he'd left. . . . This was her place of comfort when not with Moppet and Cyn, and lately the mare's heavy heart and spirit was in dire need of such a thing.
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Posted: Sun Jun 29, 2008 10:34 am
His wings still ached and creaked from overuse, accustomed to hiding deep within the forest he had rarely taken the opportunity to fly and yet...here he was, flying. Over the last few weeks he had done nothing but fly from location to location. Target after target had been dealt with until at last he had landed in the Kawani lands and his father had taken an immediate liking to the location. It had only been through the grace of the spirits and the intervention of an uninspected ally that had permitted him this reprieve.
...And it was a short one at that.
He wasn't entirely certain of how long he would be granted to perform his task. He wasn't sure if the orb would disobey him, would alert his father to his 'betrayal' but he had chosen to assume that his time was short. In a way, it was almost as though he was running from death or attempting to intervene in events that he couldn't otherwise change. However, he was passed the point of being stubborn and elusive in regards to his responsibilities...he had tried that for many years and the results hadn't been pretty.
As much as he hated to admit it, a certain female was right and he had to take his chances. Somewhere in the depths of the Grove Moppet would be yelling out, declaring she had said it first but it hadn't been her that had made the words stick. Alas, it had been the words of a certain mare that had embedded themselves in his head and it was that very same mare that now stood to be harmed again if he did not have the strength or courage to take matters into his own hooves.
So here it was, chance number one.
Flicking his braided mane away from his eyes, he soared across the lowlands in an attempt to catch sight of the familiar cream coat he had grown so accustomed to. He hadn't seen her in months and oddly, that churning in his stomach still remained everytime she came to mind - it turned into a clench and a loss of breath if his father even so much as mentioned her. That was why he knew...that was HOW he knew.
Alas, he did not expect a particularly comfortable reunion, there was little doubt in his mind that she would have found another by now. She would have settled comfortably in the months he had been absent and the most he would be able to do was advise her to go into hiding for a few weeks. It made him sick, his own cowardice had let him lose something ever so precious and while it wasn't his to take anymore his father could still use it as a bargaining chip.
A shame it had taken him a journey of many months to realise all this.
Nevertheless, amber eyes still scouring the land beneath him it wasn't long before he caught sight of the familiar 'grove'. It wasn't one he had dwelled in, but in the days he had taken his leave Bella had introduced him to its sleeping beauty and explained what became of it in spring. He had seen it asleep in winter, no doubt it had changed considerably. However, he was not permitted to dwell on this fact for long as he stared down at the small portion of land.
Green, green, darker green, cream...green.
Hang on.
With a swift beat of his wings he came to a halt above the grove and turned his gaze back down to the land below him. Scarlet cloth slipping over his eyes at the most inappropriate of times,, it was only after he had waited for another few minutes that he again saw the flicker of cream and allowed his lips to part in a soft gasp of realisation. Hidden beneath the boughs of the great willows, lay his mare.
Well not his, but either way...
With an unceremonious sigh he ceased the beating of his wings rather abruptly and plummeted towards the ground in a rather reckless descent. Timing his impact with the ground to a fine wire, he only just beat his wings in time to bounce himself away from the ground. He of course, lunged forward somewhat clumsily and was forced to trot for a few paces to regain his composure (and balance) before turning his attentions to the willow trees.
A shake of his head to shift the scarlet cloth from his eyes and he began to push his way through the overhanging branches - he had thought ivy was irritating, but willow took the trophy as it's heavier brancher proved significantly more difficult to penetrate.
Now would be the time...
"Bella?" He called out in an unusually loud tone, growling in a disgruntled manner as he thrust his rather bulky form through the branches. Really, Bella had it easy without the horns, wings, armour...cloth and any other number of things that could be considered 'grabbable' by the trees.
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Posted: Sun Jun 29, 2008 1:26 pm
So lost in thought, resting beneath the shade of the trees, the mare hadn't paid much head to sound of Azumoth's heavy landing. It was only when alone that the cream hued and amber eyed mare ever drifted close to the feeling of depression, and though she couldn't admit to such feelings, her emotions said otherwise. With Raphe grown and gone, and Azumoth away dealing with his own life, there was an emptiness present in her life.
She didn't want to dally too long with Moppet and Sin; after so long she began to feel like a burden or obligation. But the little raccoon and fluffy ebony stallion was the only family she'd ever had in her life. Sometimes she wondered what had happened - how had she come to live a life alone. Obviously she had to have family ties through blood somewhere, but exactly where they might be Bella didn't know and probably never would. . . .
Ah, but such heavy thoughts! No, she couldn't focus on them. The mare reminded herself she couldn't focus on what she didn't have but needed to think about what she DID. She had found friendship and a surrogate family, albeit a bit unofficially. She had Raphe and had beeen graced with his love and attendance. . . . . She was alive, she was healthy, she had an entire life time to live.
Such thoughts helped but Bella foudn it wasn't much of a cure. Snorting softly, she heaved a sigh and began to rest her head upon her legs when a rustling caught her attention. The thick willow boughs to her right seemed shuffled, as if attempting to part and failing. At first she thought it might be Raphe come to visit but the white unicorn had never had trouble entering before. Shifting her legs underneath her, ready to rise, a voice suddenly called out. . . and quite unhappily.
She knew that voice.
Oh gods in heaven did she know it!
He didn't sound particularly happy, but then part of Bella wasn't surprised. His little thunderclouds seemed to follow him on all occasions and was something she hardly noticed nowadays. Unable to rise, her legs having gone completely weak as her heart leapt to her throat, the blond haired mare could only stare.
It was him, wasn't it?
It . . . it could be no other! How long he'd been gone and yet suddenly, out of the blue, he showed up. He had left from this very same grove so many months before and now he returned. But when? And how? And how long? Questions began to push through the haze of girlish delight and relief - she had thought for sure he might have been lost to her forever, doing whatever it was he needed.
But he hadn't!
Slowly, slowly, Bella remembered her manners. Rising to her hooves, albeit a bit shakily, she rushed over to where he was fighting his way through. Nosing aside some of the willows, she attempted to ease his way back to the heart of her little home. "Azumoth~!" She half gasped, stomach twisting with delight and pleasure at seeing him.
Loneliness was fast forgotten as she gazed upon him, trying to soak up the moment. With him around it was as if life renewed. "You're . . . . you're home? You're HOME!" She couldn't hide it, couldn't suppress it and a great smile cracked her features. Her delight at seeing him was too much and as he passed, fight of the willows forgotten she quickly stepped before him and wrapped her neck around his own.
Ooooh! Let him b***h, she expected him to jerk away, but she was not going to pretend that this reunion was nothing special or important. He was back, and for just a moment she wanted to make sure it was him, really him, and not some silly dream. . . . .
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Posted: Mon Jun 30, 2008 12:07 pm
Jerking away really wasn't an option, whether or not the spirits had worked in line with Bella's own plotting remained to be seen but he was firmly stuck. Completely incapable of moving he had been imprisoned by the tight embrace of the willow branches and their embrace. Combine that with ticklish yet war embrace of a certain mare and he wasn't even sure if he wanted to move.
Thank the gods no one could see his face though!
His eyes were wide, his lips were pursed and though he was unaccustomed to it he could do little more than return her embrace by nudging at her shoulder lightly with his nose. Now would probably not be an appropriate time to disturb her obvious happiness however he was going decidedly more uncomfortable given the tight grasp that the branches had on his otherwise large form.
"Bella," he murmured after a few moments, twicthing his wing lightly against the weight of the branches. "As pleasant as your warm welcome is," he was never the best when it came to words and expression but if he didn't confess his discomfort now he was going to lose all feeling in his body and he would collapse. Given the reason he was here that would not be a good thing!
"I am stuck and it is really quite painful," he finished at last, a slight ghost of a smile on his equine lips as he lifted his head and attempted to remove himself from her embrace. As pleasant as it was he did have to take the possibility of another watching from afar into consideration. It had been months after all, there was bound to be other company somewhere.
Nevertheless, he didn't provide her with much opportunity to reply as he gave a small yell (as though he had lost his temper) and tore the branches down around him. It was a somewhat brutal ending to his immediate troubles and it left quite a mess of branches upon the floor but there was little doubt in his mind that the trees would recover and forgive him due to his reasons for visiting.
"That and I would not say I am home just yet," clearing his throat, Azumoth furled his wings against his armoured form and fixed his golden eyes on the petite mare. She seemed fluffier than usual, not fatter...fluffier and perhaps it was due to frolicking in the meadows but either way, she hadn't lost her beauty.
Nothing could hold a candle to it.
"Bella, you have to leave..." He promptly dismissed his desire to declare he had missed the young mare, dismissed the urge to embrace her again and instead...reverted to his old self. Yes, his logical and practical self - gruff in appearance and mannerisms. It was the perfect way to ruin a good moment, if she would let him get away with it.
"Now."
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Posted: Mon Jun 30, 2008 12:56 pm
Bella didn't want to let go. It pleased her that he hadn't completely expressed disgust and she even felt the embrace reciprocated as his nose nudged her shoulder. Ah, if only he knew though. . . . . But she couldn't dare risk their fragile friendship. It had taken him long enough to learn to like and tolerate her; if she ruined it because of her silly feelings. . . . . oh. . . .oh gods she just couldn't fathom such a thing.
He'd left so many months ago and life had been a bit hellish. But she understood and believed he would return and come back in to her life just like things had always been. If she pushed him away forever, if he left with no intention of returning ever again. . . .
Her throat tightened and she felt a surge of fear at such a thought. How wretched life might be. . . .
So she had to be cautious. It was the only way she could truly love him without him knowing. It took her a moment, and she was loathe to leave the embrace. Still, he was uncomfortable and stuck within the confines of the local canopy. Slowly, ever so slowly, the cream mare released her grip and stepped back and closer to the trunk of the tree. Eyeing her friend, it really was a bit comical to see such a great stallion fighting against the innocence of a tree. But the branches had clung to his armor and wings and overall seemed to want to embrace him in mimicry of her own action. . . .
The poor fellow. It couldn't be easy to be laden with such appendages. But at least they were all there.
Yes, Bella was biting down the urge to rush forward and look over him at all angles. He did look a bit battered, bruised and tired. . . . What a shame. Her ears twitched a bit as he stated that he wasn't truly home, but the innocent mare couldn't help but assume he meant he wasn't back home with Moppet and his grove. This wasn't his home, she wasn't home to him and she didn't blame him or expect to be. . . .
But at least he was back. And maybe he could get some rest~!
The tree was forgotten as he pushed through, uncaring about the slaughter of the willows tendrils. They would grow back soon enough. The light in her gaze hadn't dimmed and her smile hadn't faded; yes, Bella was positively beaming with delight at the sight of Azumoth. Though she'd been gifted with memories, nothing could compare to him being present in her life. Memories didn't do him justice.
Bella wasn't sure where to begin or what to say, but she wasn't offered much of a chance to speak. Before she could form a question of his general health and trip, Azumoth told her she had to leave. And now. Her smile suffered slightly, turning in to a small frown as her brows knight with concern. "What are you talking about?" And all her joy and radiance suddenly came to a screeching halt. . . . Instinct told her that something might indeed very wrong.
Very wrong. "What's going on, Azu?" And furthermore, where was she supposed to go? This was her home, this was Raphe's home. . . if she left where would she travel? Where would she hide? Part of her thought of Moppet's grove but if she had to hide from . . . god only knew what . . . would that be safe?
Maybe not. And what of Raphe? If she was in danger would he be as well? The happy reunion was, if not broken, than at least put on pause. Stepping closer, head canted to the side, she waited. He'd probably get upset. . . Bella couldn't help but assume everything she did would do nothing but irritate him . . . .but she had a right to know.
Not that she didn't blindly trust him, of course.
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Posted: Wed Jul 02, 2008 7:12 am
Where did he start? Women had a terrible habit of presenting men with very open questions and this was somewhat ironic given that Azumoth didn't enjoy talking. She asked what was happening and that would have taken hours (which he didn't have) to explain in a manner he deemed appropriate. After all, it would be necessary for him to 'doctor' the tale somewhat to ensure she didn't misunderstand or panic to the extent that she became incredibly stubborn.
He didn't have two hours to argue at her until she did as she was told! That being said, if he had've had that much time to spare then he may very well have provoked her...for old time's sake. Whether he cared to admit it or not he found her stubborn behaviour adorable and the manner in which her mane fluffed up when she was agitated was a delight. It was just as well he was so disciplined or he would have cracked a smile on many occasions...if he wasn't about to throttle her out of exasperation that is.
Nevertheless he was simply too tired to even consider arguing at this moment in time, if she put up a fuss then he would begin to nudge and push her with his head until she moved for all he cared. The very prospect of his father even getting wind of her location was simply something he could not and would not permit - over his dead body to put it simply.
"I do not have time to explain," he would at least dignify her with an answer as he shook the cloth away from his eyes and began to move towards her. "Nor can I say that it is terribly easy to understand," he continued, pulling a face as he dearly wished that someone with better conversational skills could have done this for him.
"All you need to know is that you need to move," Fixing his golden eyes on the mare he furrowed his brow, he hadn't seen her in so many months and he was already bossing her around. He was a fabulous stallion, really he had such respect for the females of his species! You could tell that from his actions, all stated with sarcasm of course (from an outsider's point of view).
"Immediately," he turned his gaze away from the mare and released a small sigh, one that couldn't hide his weariness. "There is a cave along the shorelines on the coast, it borders no forests and the dunes provide suitable cover when leaving and entering..." He'd seen it before, it was where he used to hide after he had collected his favourite food so that he could eat it in peace.
"You will not be flying in and out so it will be the perfect spot to hide."
A pause.
"That and few visit the coast too."
Less witnesses.
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Posted: Wed Jul 02, 2008 9:00 am
Bella was stubborn, almost as stubborn as the stallion before her; the great difference that lie between them though was she was optimistically stubborn. Everything could be fixed, happily ever after's ruled, and good would forever conquer evil. That was merely how the world worked. . . Or so she believed.
It was such optimism and hope that often sunk the ebony stallion before her in to a rage and annoyance; how many times had he grit his teeth and scowled at her, how many times had words she spoke cast him in to a tantrum? Far too many but Bella wasn't the brooding sort and therefor could see all the hope and light that too often the golden eyed mutant could not.
He hated her for it, certainly, but the young mare knew she was in the right. Even in the most bleak of times. . . .
Ah, but though she was stubborn and perhaps might have demanded more information from Azumoth, she also understood that there were times and places for such demands. Had this not been Azumoth demanding her take leave; had he not looked so fatigued, had he not sought her out after months of absence, maybe things would have been different. Maybe she would have objected. . . .
But not today.
Ears pricked, brow furrowed with concern Bella had to try to put unknown pieces together. Her fluffy tail swished a bit in anxiety but something told her that it was imperative she listen. "All right," she murmured, giving a little nod thought confusion still glittered behind her gaze. It didn't make sense, her hiding, not really. . . She had no enemies to call her own and Malice was long since yesterdays news. She still feared kalona, certainly, but she hadn't crossed one since that fateful meeting. So why would one be hunting her now?
"I have no enemies myself," she added, so why she was in danger she knew not. "But I've cared for an abandoned foal while you were away. He's grown now, but if he came to find me here would he too be in danger?" He might think the question stupid but she had no idea why she was being ushered out of here and could only assume that Raphe might be in danger.
Oooh, she wished with all her might her son might stay away, might not wonder where she traveled. He had abandonment issues to begin with, she'd hate to cause him alarm by a prolonged absence should he come around and find her gone. Her scent would soon pass from the grove after a few rainstorms and he would know very well that she had not returned. Then again, he might be off adventuring on his own; perhaps he wouldn't notice her 'vacation' to the sea. She could only hope, of course.
"If we must hurry then come along." She stated, albeit a bit sadly. Azumoth was rushing this, rushing things and she was beginning to understand that maybe his soul-seeking hadn't quite come to a wrap. He looked miserable, to be perfectly frank, and the exhaustion that seeped from his sigh almost made her tired. " . . . . will you have no time to rest?" So she was a barrel of questions. Her concern for his well being was obvious and clearly stated. He looked as if he could just about collapse where he stood~!
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Posted: Fri Jul 04, 2008 11:44 am
She hadn't argued and frankly he was a little surprised by this. For a moment he simply stood on the spot as though he was attempting to recount at least an hour's worth of lost time. Unfortunately for him, this hour did not exist and instead she was being amicable, it was a quality he hadn't seen (while making his demands) and it should have been of no surprise that he was somewhat stumped by it.
Ah, she'd picked quite the opportunity to throw that one out!
"Eh..." He cleared his throat and promptly gave his head a shake as though he was waking himself up. "Yes, of course..." Having broken himself out of his 'reverie' he was swift in moving towards the exit of her small grove. Needless to say, the dispute he should have had with Bella did not occur simply because the willow trees were going to do the arguing for her. In moments, he was once again stuck in the branches.
Already exhausted and patience wearing thin, he grit his teeth and unfurled his wings. One rather brutal beat was sufficient to tear the branches from around his form and he was perfectly capable from that point forward to progress through the grove with ease. Perhaps on another occasion he would have been more accomodating and well mannered but now was neither the time nor the place.
"As for your son," he glanced over his shoulder and released a small sigh, he wouldn't admit that he was happy he wasn't biologically her child. "He will be safe, I will make sure of that," he finished, turning his gaze back round so that he could follow his own path. Despite his weariness his strides still held a sense of strength and purpose, he could argue that it was the orb in his chest or perhaps emotions that sustained him at this point.
Either worked.
"Although time does not favour me, as unfortunate as it is I have no opportunity to rest," he would have given anything (within reason) to be given at least a few hours sleep. Some sanctuary, a few moments to catch his breath and to rest his now insanely heavy wings - alas, his father was so set on his goal that he would not sleep and consequently...neither would his son.
"Later, perhaps."
He shook his head again and paused briefly as he breached the grove's edge to inspect anything that may have been of any significant threat. Apparently fate favoured him in this as nothing particularly threatening or imposing (other than himself) lurked outside. The way was safe and provided they moved in a particular way they would remain out of sight too...
"Bella," he sighed again and spun round on his heels to observe the petite mare that had chosen to follow after him without any immediate questions in relation to why he had made such an order. "I am sorry."
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Posted: Sat Jul 05, 2008 8:38 am
Bella could be stubborn, most certainly, but she wasn't entirely stupid. Yes, she had often disregarded Azumoth and his orders - his orders that he could not be liked, his orders that she should never return to his forest, his demands that he could never be loved. Yes, she had ignored them all and gladly so! But this demand from him wasn't something so easily ignored. . . .
He had left for so long and now suddenly appeared back in her life and at her grove no less! For a third time now he cared little about the other soquili roaming around in the hills and this time had purposely sought her out. But the reunion hadn't been happy and part of the mare understood that perhaps his soul seeking hadn't been as pleasant a trip as she might have hoped. There was an urgancy to him, an exhaustion that she couldn't place and new wounds that she hadn't seen before. It was if he'd been in battle and yet. . . . why? With who?
No, she had no idea why she was being told to move but that didn't mean she couldn't. . . wouldn't. . . find out. A glance around her grove, giving it one last fond look as Azumoth battled his way out, the mare couldn't help but turn and follow. At least Raphe would be safe. . . a shame she had no way to communicate her own safety to the lad. How long would she be placed in hiding? How long would she be alone once again?
She did have questions, many of them. Why was she being hid? How long would she be there? Would she have no contact with any during her stay? What of Moppet and Cyn, were they in trouble? Too many questions and not enough time to answer. Still, as she waited at the edge of her own little grove, the mare tried to think of the best words to speak.
"Please be very careful then," she murmured softly, concern pained within her small voice. Not that he'd grow to be reckless, of course not, but exhaustion could do strange things to a soquili and if trouble followed where he walked. . . . well. . . . She feared the reality of the situation she was entirely clueless on. Maybe it was a good thing she didn't understand what was happening - ignorance was bliss, and wasn't Bella one of the more blissful?
Her mind continued to roll in confusion. But once they began their journey, their trek, perhaps she could get a few things answered. His paranoia was slowly becoming her fear and Bella did not like such a feeling. "Azu, I - - - " She blinked, biting back her words as the ebony stallion suddenly whirled round to face her.
Cream ears pricked instantly, amber eyes widening a bit in surprise at this sudden and very random apology. What? What on earth was he talking about! Was this his exhaustion speaking or was he in his right mind? And if he was in his right mind, there still was no reason for him to suddenly apologize! Oooooh - what was going on with this day? Her long tail of curls and waves swished lightly behind her, though her expression softened from its earlier concern and confusion. "Whatever for?" Despite the heavy air surrounding Azu, the drear and confusion in her own life, the young mare couldn't stop from smiling ever so assuringly. "I'd say such an apology is fast accepted but there's no reason for you to be sorry."
It was a moment to be written in the history books and a very small sliver of Bella felt relief at such words. For old wounds her stubborn femininity demanded retribution, for the callousness the stallion could often emit without giving a second thought. Though she'd long forgiven him for such things, the mare wanted to feel relief by hearing him apologize, and yet instead she found herself stumped once again with confusion.
This wasn't like Azumoth not at all.
"Please," she smiled, a small breezy chuckle escaping her lips even admist the unspoken tension. "All is truly well."
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Posted: Wed Jul 09, 2008 7:29 am
If Azumoth was completely honest then he would have confessed that he needed to apologise for a long string of offences. It was undeniable that she had endured far more abuse than any other. The mutant would have argued that this would not have happened if the mare had left him. After all, the majority of females fled from his presence after one insult - let alone a string of them. Unfortunately the stallion had not accounted for her stubborn ignorance and thus she had been subject to far more than she should have. It would take more than the time he had to apologise for that.
Well, that's what he thought at least.
There were other methods of apologising of course... His mother had explained to him long ago that small gestures, grand gestures and simple actions had weight. In fact, she had argued with him on a number of occasions that small gestures could speak louder than words. Really he had never grasped this concept but that was because he had never had a reason to try it. Add this to the fact that he hadn't the faintest idea what to do in the form of a gesture...and the entire definition of 'small' was stomped into the ground. When it came to this particular mutant there was no such thing as a 'small gesture' given his habit of over analysing everything!
Nevertheless he was aware when this particular mare was lying and when her 'optimism' was fighting against nerves. She may have claimed that everything was all right, that all was well; but, he knew by the facial expression and the change in tone that it wasn't. The stallion who was often known for being so composed and calm was agitated, this undoubtably did nothing for another soquili's nerves. It was a sign (sort of) that he should perhaps find a way of calming himself down - perhaps if he toned down the severity of the situation she would relax.
Just a little.
"I have told you before that you should not lie," he released a small sigh as he heard the severity of his own tone. Weariness really did nothing for his social skills, as a beast who enjoyed his sleep he really was terribly snappy when deprived. Combine this with the added weight in his chest and the threat upon his treasure and he was just a tad abrasive. It was one of those occasions when an individual took one step forward and then about a hundred backwards - someday he would improve...just not right now.
"If you had something to say, then do so," clearing his throat the stallion tore his gaze from the petitie mare and began to stride towards his chosen destination again. Ruffling his wings every now and again, he ensured his pace wasn't too fast for her and pressed on. Really he didn't have the time for small talk but he had interrupted her and he did have manners. He just hoped that whatever she had to say didn't place him in any other dire situations just yet.
Knowing his luck (and her luck), she was going to confess that she had been attacked by another soquili. This of course would add yet another thing to his 'to do' list before he could sleep.
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Posted: Wed Jul 09, 2008 10:52 am
Bella blinked, canting her head in a moments confusion as the stallion spoke. Lie? The mare didn't understand why he felt she was crossing such a state of feeling. Bella had a tendency to sugar coat the truth but nothing she stated now was such a statement. Her brows knitted briefly as she tried to follow Azumoth's train of thought and conversation and came up short. "I don't follow," she admitted softly, lowering her head, preparing herself for some scathing remark for her inability to understand. "What do you think I've lied about? For everything I've said is true. There is no reason for you to apologize, such a thing isn't necessary." Her smile was light, gentle though she doubted he saw. Trotting closer she added, "I know we haven't seen to eye on things in the past, but if you feel you should apologize than its only proper I do the same. So I'm sorry. . . for all the grief and headaches and overall exasperation I've caused you. I know I'm not easy to tolerate but I am very thankful and forever grateful we crossed paths."
The young mare had to be careful to keep her works in check She didn't want to appear to be gushing, though such a thing was something she easily could have done, but it was a start. She owed Azumoth so much more than just friendship and she doubted the stallion realized just how grateful she was to him, and just how precious he was.
"The only thing I had meant to say, had wanted to say, was everything you've already heard." Oh bother. She could feel her nose flushing just at the thought of what she wanted to admit, she wanted to tell him. But though exhausted she knew she couldn't play her words off as something they weren't. Flattening her ears slightly, trying to find the proper words without throwing him in to a fuss, Bella struggled. "I guess part of me doesn't understand why you're going through such a hassle for . . for me. And I'm not being vain or conceited, truly, I know you'd be so bold for any in trouble," well . . most anyone she imagined. He was a natural protector and guardian after all. "And I know this doesn't make me special or anything, not that I don't feel blessed by your friendship or want to be special, I just. . . " Crap. She was losing her train of thought and probably upsetting him by the ramble! He was so curt and concise with everything and here she was blathering about . . . nothing.
Damnit. Why did he always do this to her? Even when he wasn't trying to confuse and upset her he still pulled it off! Now how on earth was she going to rescue herself? "Well what I mean is that. . . it's just a surprise is all. But now that you're here, and I've had a lot of time to think, I just want to tell you that . . . that you've been missed. Greatly. And since you'll be leaving again so soon I just . . . I just want to remind you to be extra careful because . . . . because a great many would be terribly upset and traumatized if you . . . if something happened."
By the time she spit everything out, her nose was pink and so low to the ground she was practically eating dirt. This wouldn't effect him, he'd brush it off, play it cool, she'd be lucky if she got a grunt out of him. But at least she'd said, without saying, how much she cared. Why did she open her mouth at the worst and most inopportune times?
Why?
He wasn't going to be happy with her and at the moment she wasn't exactly happy with herself. She sounded like a fool, though those in love often were. But he'd never, ever know that . . . . They'd crossed lines of attraction once before the results had been horribly embarrassing for her. She feared a repeat of their time by the lake, such hurt wasn't something she could handle again.
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Posted: Wed Jul 09, 2008 2:33 pm
Good grief what was she saying? Azumoth kept his gaze ahead as Bella made an appalling attempt to express herself. He was aware that he often made soquili stutter but really! The more he listened to the poor mare the more agitated he became. He had been through this with her before and had also been rather angry when she had belittled herself in such a manner so why insist on doing it again? Was it the lack of his presence, did soquili really revert to that sort of behaviour?
Really, he had hoped she would be stronger than that.
Nevertheless he could do nothing more than grit his teeth as she persisted with prattle. It was only when she spoke of what was special, what wasn't... Who was she to dictate who he placed above the rest? And had she not by now realised that he placed her in far higher standings? The very fact he had even permitted her to meet his family and explore his grove surely meant something! He hadn't been away that long, she couldn't possible have forgotten the significance behind all this.
Unfortunately his patience had all but ran out by this time and it took every fibre in his body and al lthe effort in the world for him to resist the urge to snap. The more she chattered, the more he felt the urge to twitch and shout out. Alas he was more disciplined than that and instead he had chosen to glare at what lay ahead - gods forbid there was any creature ahead of him as it would have been an omen to the poor thing. However, while he could contain himself a point...she had more to prattle about than he had remaining strands of patience.
"For everything that is good and holy, Bella!" He yelled at last, coming to a halt and spinning round on his heel with such force that the grass beneath him twisted into the soil. Blades snapping beneath his weight, unable to survive the strain and stretching...it was only a sign of what was to come. In a sense they were probably a very accurate indication of the current state of his patience and mind.
"Can you not see that I love you?" His tone remained loud, harsh and incredibly abrupt but one couldn't blame him for his loss of control. There was only so much a stallion could take and the very fact he was even confessing to any sort of emotion was a miracle. It was a sure sign that hell was going to freeze over and the world was going to end. The confession had been so sudden that even he hadn't quite registered it.
Then it hit him.
And the world fell silent.
Standing in a similar manner to that of a bewildered child he could do nothing more than stare.
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Posted: Wed Jul 09, 2008 8:27 pm
It wasn't that Bella forgot her significance, it was merely she couldn't possibly know of such a place. Yes, they were friends but she couldn't possible assume that her lot in his life was any more important than another. He tolerated her. Though there he offered her safety, he also protected all within his grove; she was lucky to have met Moppet and Cyn and his brothers but again, she had rather forced herself in to his life. . . .
Ah, but though she failed with the art of expression, though she hardly understood what it was she was trying to express, Azumoth surely was no master. Short, concise words, belittling comments often washed down with surly anger didn't mean he took the cake when it came to the art of conversing. So once again, the pair stood on opposite corners when it came to the subject of a matter and once again Bella found herself exasperating him.
His whirl to face her, his harsh and rather abrupt fume of anger caused her to visibly wince and shrink back. Amber eyes stared up at him from where her head hung, her thick locks of mane framing her features. It was almost a pathetic scene, profuse apology written clearly and needing only be formed by her lips.
She hadn't lost her touch. . . . Maybe it was better if she didn't speak at all. So much for a happy reunion, but then again, that wouldn't exactly be like them. Every time they seemed to meet someone wound up angry or hurt, and today seemed to be no different. He was tired, had a lot on his mind, and all she was doing was being a nuisance. Why did she have to speak so freely and so poorly?
Now he was angry, livid. Both regret and guilt radiated like heat from the sun off of her figure, unsure what to say. But she didn't have time to speak, to offer an apology as the black mutant before her spoke a few rather shocking words.
"Can you not see that I love you?"
Two ears pricked and she couldn't help but throw her head back up to its proper position in surprise. What? What had he said?
No. No way. She was hearing things, she was putting in words that weren't there. An eerie and tension filled silence passed, Azumoth saying nothing and Bella unable to believe. He . . . he loved her?
The term like had now been replaced by something stronger, something she could never have dreamed possible. Azumoth was a difficult case to crack, and she knew the hurt and pain he had suffered; not just from his father but friends and, especially so, mares. Love wasn't something he'd readily admit to and yet here he was . . . spouting off about how she couldn't see that he loved her.
Well when he said it like that, all sorts of angry, pissed off and annoyed a mare had to wonder how much validity was present. But as the silence drained on, the cream mare knew that such a display of emotion, even in anger, wasn't so lightly done. He loved her. . . He . . . he LOVED her. Her. Of all the mares in the world it somehow, miraculously had been and was her.
Though her heart was still trodden with guilt from causing him so much anger, Bella practically reeled from his admittance. "You . . . you love me?" She breathed, as if there were some other mare he was speaking to. Bella almost looked around but didn't dare break from his gaze.
She had dreamed of a day he told her those words, but never had she dreamed they'd first be spoken in anger. Ah . . . but what did it matter? Now wasn't a time to get sentimental. . . and yet her heart still soared. It was hard for her to understand such a concept and yet, even in his most pissed off and agitated, she could still hear his words ring against her ears.
He loved her.
Somehow she just hadn't seen it.
Ah, but now he placed her in a stranger predicament. His anger made her defensive and she feared opening her mouth to respond. He was angry already and, knowing her history with him as she did, there was a severe chance anything she said would only push him further in to exasperation and annoyance.
Thankfully for him, her confusion was quick to wash away as she came to the conclusion that now was the time to say what she had to say but with the heavy reminder to keep it short, brusque, brief. Though her expression was serious, cautious, there was no hiding the light that suddenly burned bright behind her gaze. In fact, if one looked hard enough they might even see a shimmer reminiscent to the glaze and soft touch of tears.
"I suppose I misread some signals somewhere down the road," she whispered, still partially breathless from the admittance. "But let me just say this," she added a little louder. Please don't let him take back what he said, and most of all please don't let him be so mad! Though she never feared for her life around him, he still could look awfully intimidating when mad. With a small gasp, eyes full of joy but now shadowed by shyness renewed, she spoke with words laced in the full extent of her adoration.
"I love you too."
He couldn't realize how long she had felt that way, couldn't understand how long she'd yearned to tell him that. And so she waited. . . . There was so much more she wanted to say, so much more she wanted to admit but for once short and sweet was the best route to go.
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Posted: Sat Jul 12, 2008 7:48 am
There, he had said it and he half expected her to join the ranks of mares who had stared at him with pity. He had held it off for months, grit his teeth and reminded himself that there were things he couldn't have. However, despite this his mother had persisted in pushing him to the brink. Moppet had continued to encourage him to try, to open his eyes and not to lose hope just because the world was full of morons. In hindsight she hadn't really expressed that in the most appropriate of ways but now he could see her point.
He felt lighter.
As Bella echoed his own words his ears flattened against his head briefly. Unaccustomed to registering such emotions and words (with the exception of those yapped to him by his mother), it almost seemed bizarre and surreal that another would utter them too. A child yes, but a mare? After all those who had pitied him it seemed almost foreign to hear such words uttered. Even for one made of metal like his own, he was disconcerted and a little unsure.
"Probably all of them," he at last spoke, his tone gruff as he cleared his throat and turned on his hooves slightly. He had no time for this type of reunion and if he was honest, he was rather glad of that. He simply hadn't the slightest idea what to do or how to express himself. There were things this great beast excelled at but this was most certainly not one of those. Thus, it was with a flick of his tail and a quick glance at Bella that he moved away again...he just hoped she wouldn't prattle about being unworthy any more.
"We haven't much time left, let's go," clearing his throat again he stepped off towards the shoreline once more and shook the scarlet cloth from his eyes. Expression still troubled and uncertain though now it was not only due to his father, but due to the overwhelming number of emotions running through his mind. He would later realise that confessing his feelings for the mare at this time was not the grand gesture his mother had been referring to...alas, all in due time.
"But allow me to say one thing," he kept his back turned, incapable of turning round to face her for fear that he would get stuck in a conversation he couldn't get himself out of. "I do not tolerate prattle and stubborness for so long as I have endured yours, that alone was sign enough..."
Ah but of course, in his own way he had loved the mare since the moment he saw her. However he had never permitted himself to take it as anything more than a recognition of her beauty. Hell, he had tried to see her as a daughter but that had all but failed. In fact, when he really thought about it every single one of his methods of pushing her aside had failed miserably.
"It appears my mother was right," he came to a halt again and glanced over his shoulder, his expression unreadable given the sheer number of emotions running through his head. "Sometimes when you stop looking, the spirits bring the treasure to you..."
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Posted: Sat Jul 12, 2008 10:18 pm
It was odd, really. He had told her he loved her, had said it, had meant it and Bella had finally been able to fess up to her own secret. She loved him, adored him, and had wanted nothing more than this moment. How she had yearned to hear it, how she had wanted and hoped to capture his love and adoration. It hadn't been easy, and it was safe to say that she had missed many a great signal, but finally her love could be realized. It didn't have to be a secret any longer. . and wasn't. Today, things suddenly fell in to place, and she now held the knowledge that he did love her. . . .
But if Bella had hoped or expected something to change, something to suddenly become different, she was sadly mistaken. His ears had flattened against the words she spoke and all in all continued to be Azumoth through and through. His expression hadn't softened, he was still edgy as hell, and as typical with everything she still had no idea if he was actually pleased to her her admittance or not. He was one tough cookie to read and she honestly couldn't see anything past his stony features. . . . It was no fair he read her like a book. And not just any book but the book with superbly large text for the elderly, magnifying glass included!
Still, this was Azumoth after all. And she couldn't help but love him even more for his prickly pear behavior. He was under stress, he was more than a bit rushed, and he really didn't look to be the fawning type. That was her job, after all. Despite being unsure of what he thought, even knowing now how he did feel, Bella found herself unable to stop smiling.
Shock had transformed her features in to something radiant, practically brilliant, washing away her earlier guilt.
She needed no other words, needed nothing else besides such knowledge. He loved her and that was all that mattered. . . Every time she thought about it, every time she repeated the memory - and it was indeed being replayed within her heart and soul - she felt as if she had grown wings and was soaring high above cloud nine.
He loved her. . . loved her. . . . HE loved her. . . .
And to think she hadn't thought he found her special! If she had truly, amazingly enough captured his heart - Azu would never joke about such a matter even if he were the joking type - Bella couldn't understand how or when such a thing had happened. Though he loved her, she understood she still frequently annoyed, irritated and exasperated him. Having him like her had been a surprise, so when had such a feeling developed in to love?
Bella couldn't help but quietly be giddy and feel ever so cherished. Outside of Raphe, she had no one to say they loved her, no one in her life. Moppet was a friend, Azumoth was a friend, but she'd lived the vast majorit of her life alone. Love was something meant for others, not for her. . . And yet here she stood, with her shadowed knight allowing her dreams to take shape and come true.
Despite her fluttering heart and the whirlwind of emotions causing the world to go blurry, Bella said nothing and kept herself in silence. He hated prattle and dare she open her mouth she couldn't trust herself not to say something incredibly stupid and push him away once again.
Just once she wanted to do something right for a change, and at this moment she needed to more than ever.
So it was with silence that Bella walked, unable to say more and not wanting to break the tender moment. . . even if it was anything but. Quickening her step, Bella picked up her pace to move closer to where he walked. She made sure to keep a slight distance and not crowd him, just because there was suddenly a knowledge of love, Bella hadn't a clue where that put their current boundaries. . . .
Ah, but she did walk as close as she dared. He admitted to tolerating her prattle and stubborn nature, a sign of his love. Strange how it almost was an insult all the same, but it was also close enough to a compliment that she didn't dare object. She was stubborn and she did know how to chatter. . . . "I am well and truly blessed," she murmured, meaning every word and hoping he would understand that the blessing came from him.
Their relationship was far form easy, but it wasn't something she'd trade for the world.
As he stopped and glanced over her shoulder, she paused, ears flipping back a moment out of instinctive reaction. Any reproof and reproach she might have thought he would say turned in to something rather sweet. Sweet enough to cause Bella a billionth moment of confusion and a moments glitter of tears. Even if he never once offered her praise, to be referred to as a treasure by him was more than she could wish.
What words could she speak? Nothing that wouldn't upset the ever-fragile mood. . . . There were no words she could speak in response and so it was she made her move. Trotting forward, she paused but only long enough to offer him an ever gentle, ever affectionate nuzzle against his neck and cheek.
Let him rebuff her, let him start away or offer something cruel to say. Just let him complain (though deep down she hoped he wouldn't. . .just this once. . .). "Come on," she murmured softly, voice thick with her feeling and liable to crack "If you keep saying such things I fear I may keep holding us up with such surprise." And goodness knew she didn't want to aggravate him further. . .
But despite her desire to walk, Bella also feared the signs of beaches and the roar of water. The sooner they arrived the sooner he would once again leave and slip out of her life. . . He would come back, certainly, but to now have to wait for him alone and with such knowledge that he gave her; without Raphe, without Moppet, without him . . . .
It was going to be one lonely and ever anxious wait. Parting wasn't something that came easy to Bella, as Azumoth had learned first hand. She had met him that fateful day within the woods, and had refused to leave and be rid of his woods. Sure, there were breaks in between, but the young mare had yet to remove her presence from his life with any sort of permanence.
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