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 Posted: Sat Jun 07, 2008 3:51 pm
It was quiet, and right now, that was what she needed. Complete and total solitude, just her and no one else, especially not him. Teal eyes drifted down to the pool water, the smell of chlorine rising to meet her, a strange comfort in this empty section of the gym. With the lights off, the only light came from the high windows on either wall, which caused patterns of light to dance from the waters surface against the shadows. She had found a long time ago that it was a great place to think when it was deserted for the day, and thinking was what she needed more than anything right now.
It hurt, it hurt badly. She wasn't sure what had happened between last night and today, or perhaps the little time she had spent away from him in the early hours of the morning, but something in him had changed. He was violent, angry, and she couldn't get close to him without him pushing her away with a stare or a growl. She had thought things would have been different, that he wanted something from her other than one simple night, but she supposed he was a better liar than she had ever imagined.
She shut her eyes against the light that danced from the pool, shifting where she sat at the edge, trying to take a deep breath to calm herself down. She had given in to him because she wanted him, wanted him more than just for a night, wanted to know what it was like to finally feel- Finally feel what? She smirked coldly at the thought, knowing what word went at the end, but unable to bring herself to finish such a silly notion. She wasn't sure he had ever felt anything for her, she wasn't sure what parts of his words had been truths and what had been lies. Had any of it been true?
She swallowed down the lump in her throat and opened her eyes, digging into the pocket of her backpack as it lay tossed down forgotten at her side. Pulling out the cellphone that she carried around, she gazed down at it, for a moment dreading the day she had ever bothered to concoct her ridiculous notion. Maybe it had all been a way to get back at her, hurt her for being such a b***h. It wouldn't surprise her, and the way he was acting certainly didn't show any affection at all. If anything, he seemed more irritated. Perhaps because he had to put up with her still, perhaps because he still feared the stupid images there?
She flipped it open, and in a few swift button presses, she brought up those damning files. It would be easier, for her, if he just left. Without the images, he had no reason to bother with her anymore, right? He could leave, go back to fighting, and she wouldn't have to look at him, see his face every time she turned around, and be reminded of the foolish ideas she had actually expected to be true.
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Posted: Sat Jun 07, 2008 5:49 pm
She wasn't there. She wasn't in the library, she wasn't in the classrooms, and she wasn't even in the corridors. Anana was nowhere to be found, and Nuka was well down the path of having a rather spectacular panic attack. He'd turned away from Anana for a grand total of three god damned minutes in order to glare at someone that, in his honest opinion, was being horribly ******** obnoxious by leering the girl in question... and then, when he'd been secured in the notion that the boy had been scared away, she was gone.
He'd looked everywhere; he'd even opened the door of several classrooms while the teachers were teaching inside, to shoot panicked glances over the student body before rushing off to the next place in his mental list. She was not to be found in any of those, and the longer he stayed away from her, the more Nuka's mind plunged into the terrible, horrible, catastrophic 'what if's. What if someone had kidnapped her? What if someone had hurt hurt?! What if someone had dragged her down some damned, dark alley and had had their way with her?!
The fact he felt he'd done similarly himself and she'd not even protested him only made the dark notions all the more real, "ARGGG!" he paused in his running to run his hands through his hair, shooting panicked glances left and right, earning himself several stares from the student body, whom were... needless to say, not entirely all that used to seeing the usually scowling boy looking like he'd seen a ghost. Oh god, oh god, where WAS she?!
Fine. Okay. Pause. Think... ponder.... rationally. Where had he not checked yet? After making a mental list, and noticing the only two places in the entire school he'd not barged in on were the roof and the pool, he rushed off towards the one that was nearer; the indoor pool. Amusingly enough, he made quite a scene, practically crashing through the doors, almost managing to fall down in his haste, still looking horribly shaken, out of breath and extremely panicked (he'd been having a panic attack for the past half hour; in all honesty it was a miracle he hadn't collapsed from exhaustion yet), "Oh GOD!" he bellowed as he finally spotted her, his eyes wide, "THERE you are, bloody hell!" the notion she was, in fact, safe, allowed him to sink to his knees for a moment, catching his breath as best he could, "Bloody hell..." it was repeated again, as if honestly there was no better way to convey the obvious distress he was showing, "Where were you..." the last words were murmured more than bellowed.
It must have been horribly confusing to see him in such a state though. It was probable she'd never even seen him panicked; not even after a fight, or before.
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Posted: Sat Jun 07, 2008 6:07 pm
She jerked up as she heard the door come crashing open, and in all honesty, who wouldn't have? As her eyes fell upon the person that had caused all the noise, she managed a slight frown, glancing away as she felt her heart twisting from the simple sight of him. She watched the water for a long time, refusing to answer him, her cellphone still held calmly in her hand. She had come here to get away from him, and here he was, following her like a puppy. No, not a puppy, a savage wolf.
It didn't surprise her, really, that he had come, and come so quickly. It was obvious that he was out of breath, so he must have been searching for her for a long time, probably as soon as he noticed that she was gone. She saw the panic on his face, but chalked it up to nothing more than his fear that she'd actually show the pictures off. If she had left him alone all of a sudden, hell, she could be out showing them when he wasn't looking, right? Wasn't like he didn't deserve it.
"I've been right here, the whole time," she said slowly, softly, trying to keep her voice straight. She stared down at the water to avoid looking at him, because every time she did, it felt like every inch of her body was on fire. She could remember his touch, and his kiss, and something that burned in his eyes (or something she had been sure did) but was now replaced with a cold stare he reserved for her when she got too close. It ached, the emptiness, and looking at him reminded her of it all and more. "You looked like you were going to start another fight with that poor guy so I just decided it'd be easier to sit here by myself. I've had enough of the growling and threatening today." She was talking, but her voice was especially.. flat, empty. It hurt, her chest ached, and the only way she could manage to speak to him was to attempt to push it all away.
Finally, she forced her eyes up to look at him, steadying herself. She felt like crying, which was really saying something, as she never, ever cried. She was strong-willed and crying was just not something she did. The last time was probably at her mother's funeral, and she had been small then, very small. "I deleted them, the pictures," she brought her hand up, waving her cellphone for emphasis before closing it to set it aside. "So you can go.. back to whatever you were doing, I won't force you to be here anymore."
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Posted: Sat Jun 07, 2008 6:46 pm
The pictures? .... Pictures? What pictures?
He jerked his head up, and then, for full, whole minute, the boy looked utterly confused. Almost as if he had no clue what she was even talking about. In his defense, panicking had taken up most of his brain power, and the adrenaline was only just starting to fade away, "What-" and then, it finally dawned on him just what pictures she was talking about, "Oh, bloody hell!" pushing himself up to his feet finally, he turned to face her, and then paused again, and the panic seemed to return in full force because she was trembling and she looked like she was going to cry.
WHY?
What-wha-WHY?!
How ironic that it'd never even crossed his mind that he was the cause of this; after all, in his thoughts, he'd done nothing at all other than protect her. From himself and others; granted, it'd been hell, keeping himself from reaching out to touch her, avoiding her physically and reining himself in every time he felt like reaching out to her. However, as far as he was concerned it was for her own good.
Regardless of whatever promise he'd made in his own mind, he was at her side unbidden in an instant, "I don't give a DAMN about those ******** pictures, you idiot!" it was true too, "I haven't given a damn about them for more than a couple of weeks now! They're useless anyhow!" for some odd reason, and though he had yet to fully understand what was going on, he felt the need to convey that much. As if it were horribly important for her to at least understand that much, "Useless because I don't even HAVE a ******** reputation to destroy any more!" a pause as he looked away, his hands clenching into fists as he had to keep himself from reaching out to her, "You did a pretty good job at destroying it anyhow, without those pictures... and I did nothing to stop it," the later was mumbled, not because he was ashamed, but rather, because he still couldn't quite believe it himself.
His gaze remain off of her for a long time before it returned, seeking her eyes out briefly, "Why do you think I kept on coming to school and beat up? Why do you think I was in the infirmary yesterday morning? Everyone, friends, enemies, it doesn't matter any more, they gang up on me... and it's because of you. Because I refuse to..." he cut himself off there and looked away, "I didn't care about the stupid photos."
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Posted: Sat Jun 07, 2008 8:28 pm
She stiffened at his words, but turned her eyes away from him as he came to her side. She didn't want him near her, certainly not when he was spouting words that didn't make any sense to her given how he had been reacting to her all day. If he didn't care about them, then what made him bother to stick around? He made her think he cared, said things to her that she had almost been sure he wouldn't have dared say to anyone else, held her through the entire night, and here he was now acting like.. he didn't want her at all. So why stick around, why torture her with memories she didn't want to relive, memories of something she had thought was so right, but turned out to mean nothing? She wanted to hit him, and she wanted to cry. Both were childish, but some part of her said that it'd feel damn good.
"Don't call me an idiot, you b*****d," she said suddenly, eyes flashing in the light as she turned to look back up at him. "If they don't mean anything to you, then why do you even bother sticking around me? I thought I understood, last night, but apparently I was wrong." She shook her head, her mouth twitching into a coldly amused smile, though she looked weary. This was why she didn't bother with boys, or relationships, or anything. She was never going to get any studying done anytime soon, not with this on her mind, not with him on her mind. She was sure, too, that there was no time soon that she was going to be able to quit thinking about him. If she had just ignored her feelings, told herself her education was more important, she wouldn't be having this dilemma. She must've convinced herself the night before that Nuka was different, but god, she couldn't have been more wrong.
"Well, maybe you should have stopped it then, hm? Then you could have your reputation, and your friends, and without that blackmail you wouldn't have a thing to worry about at all anymore, would you?" She knew that she was getting upset, because she was starting to talk more quickly and her words were a little shaky. She never got like this, ever, she was always calm. Always. She didn't even register that he seemed confused over why he didn't, indeed, stop it - she didn't care. All she felt was hurt, and she was acting on that feeling.
She caught his eyes as he looked back at her, swallowing the lump in her throat, feeling the tears starting to fill in her eyes. She was going to cry, and more, he was going to see it. Of all the people right now, she didn't want him to see. She'd prefer if no one did, but least of all him. "Then stop bothering with me, isn't that what you want?" She shook her head, running a hand through her hair, and as she had done when she was frustrated the night before, she let her palm rest lightly against her temple as her fingers stroked through her dark locks. "You're a fool if you come to school just to get beaten up for being around me if you don't care about the blackmail, especially if you don't want to be near me anyway." That was it, those last words came out shaky, and the first tear rolled down her cheek in a hot stream that she didn't even bother to brush away.
"So why are you still looming over me, Nuka, why aren't you running out that bloody door?" she asked, glancing up at him as if agitated, confused why he wouldn't just leave when she told him he could, when it was all she really wanted him to do now. "You spend all day sneering at me and now you're going to pretend like you have a heart?" she shook her head, glancing down at the pool before her, "that is sick, even for you." She didn't care what she said, if any of it hurt him, then all the better - he could feel what it felt like. She felt shunned, used, and it hurt, especially because she thought.. she thought he had actually wanted something more from her.
When did she start being so foolish?
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Posted: Sun Jun 08, 2008 6:06 am
She was on the verge of crying.
He could see that. Any idiot would've seen that, and needless to say, Nuka found himself struggling; he found himself struggling to keep his cool, to stay rooted to the spot he'd lowered himself to... to not touch her. To stay away, because that's what she needed. Wasn't it? Gritting his teeth, he narrowed his eyes, "I'll call you whatever the hell I want! You might be an idiot, but you're MY idiot!" he told her right back, the adrenaline that was still pumping throughout him no doubt spurring the words he'd have otherwise tried to bite back.
If anything was clear, it was that both were stubborn... and both were hurt, albeit for different reasons and neither seemed to be able to figure out the other. Then again, that was the story of Nuka's life. He'd never been all too socially inclined; he'd never quite understood or even bothered to understand others. It was a waste of his time, which he was more prone to spending alone, holed up somewhere. The fact he had no clue what, exactly, was going on, or why she was so upset was hardly surprising.
He tried to open his mouth to answer, but he found it impossible due to the way she talked; rushed, her words practically running over and against each other, "I... I..." he didn't get much further than that; the first tear rolled over her cheek, and it suddenly dawned upon him that it was all his fault. All his, no one else's. It hadn't been some random stranger that had brought sadness upon her, but he himself, trying his best to protect her.
Why aren't you running out that bloody door?
The words hit him like a ton of bricks, and the boy stiffened visibly at them. There was a moment's pause as his eyes narrowed, the anger washing away from his system, "That's because I didn't want to," the words were reminiscent of the previous night, but the roles were inverted; it was almost ironic in a way. A hand reached out towards her, but stopped just shy of touching her. Then, with a scowl, he pushed himself to his feet and stood over her, looking down; his shadow covered her form, he noticed. She really was a lithe thing compared to him, "I didn't want to... I was fine with just being with you. I was..." well, not happy, but still, "Doesn't matter, you're right. I don't deserve you anyhow; I took advantage of your moment of weakness last night, and I felt absolutely assholic about it. That's not what I'd meant to do. I wanted you to come to me because you wanted to, not because you were scared," the words were whispered as he looked away, and in a way sort of started to explain his pushing her away that day; he felt guilty, to the point he honestly thought he should keep away from her, "I tried to pull away, but... but then, those guys kept looking at you, and that one guy brushed against you and..." it'd been a childish notion, but the possessive jealousy he'd felt hadn't exactly been all too rational.
Snapping his mouth shut, he clenched his jaw shut, turning away from her to walk towards the pool door. He paused when he reached it, a hand on the handle, "I panicked; I thought if I'd taken advantage of you, someone might've like, ******** kidnapped you and dragged you down a bloody dark alley when I turned away and you weren't THERE anymore," he wanted to leave, and yet, he honestly couldn't bring himself to do so, "Yeah well you're right, but just so you know; this sick, heartless b*****d is in love with you," and this said, he opened the door and slipped out of the room. Once outside, he turned his gaze towards the ceiling and allowed himself to slip to a sitting position on the floor, just behind the doors.
He was a fool.
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Posted: Sun Jun 08, 2008 11:00 am
It was guilt. Guilt had made him do this to her? On some level, instantly, part of her stopped feeling upset and sorry for herself and instantly became angry. Again, she had misjudged him, and unlike Nuka, she wasn't socially inept. She might spend a lot of time with her head stuck into her books, but she was quite a social butterfly when she chose to be. She had friends, she was well known, and if not exactly popular, she was liked on a large scale. She prided herself in her ability to figure others out, but he continued to baffle her, over and over, to the point that she was no longer sure she would ever be able to know what he was truly feeling. Was it a flaw in him, a flaw in her? Was he so socially stunted that she couldn't connect with him enough to know, or was the underlying problem with her?
She had put herself out there for him, he had taken her, and decided finally that it was done only in a moment of his own weakness. Could he possibly know what it felt like to hear that? She wasn't stupid, even if she was innocent, and her fear had certainly driven her to nothing. It was her own feelings that had caused her actions, and even if she had not realized them before last night, what was wrong with that? She had never dated anyone and it had taken what he'd done to make her realize what she felt for him. She worked up all that courage, all that bravery to do something she'd never done and he squashed it down and chalked it up to nothing more than him taking advantage of her? Did he even see his own actions? He had warned her, repeatedly, and if that wasn't enough to say that she had had acted of her own choice then what was?
She watched the shadow around her form move, though she didn't follow him with her eyes, and heard him as his footsteps led to the door. She hadn't walked out on him when he had needed her, but he really was going to walk out on her. No, not a wolf like she had thought, still just a puppy - running with his tail tucked between his legs. Though, as soon as he slipped out that door and left her alone in the darkness of the pool room, she heard his last words playing over and over again in her head. Love. Love? Love? He had a fine way of showing it. She felt heart broken, because she knew it was love, now, that she felt for him and he had taken that and.. shattered it even while claiming to want it. Her love wasn't good enough, except on the terms he wanted her to give it to him. It didn't mean anything until she did it how he imagined she should.
He was the idiot.
As she let her eyes drift up to the the patterns of light playing off of the water on the walls, she brought her hands up to wash away the tears that had streamed down her face. This was ridiculous, all of it. She was never going to get anything done if she sat here like this and continued to act like a lovesick idiot. She had never approved of people that acted the way she was acting because it took their attention away from what was important. She had things to do, books to study, assignments to prepare for. Her whole life depended upon her school work and this fool boy was messing this up. If she sat here, let him walk away, she knew it'd be days, weeks before she mended her heart enough to concentrate. How much would it all suffer by then? There seemed to be only one option, and as much as she didn't want to be the one to give in, she had to mend this for her sake. She wasn't going to be a baby any longer, she needed her life back, and damn it if her life didn't also include him now as far as she was concerned.
She pushed herself to her feet and impatiently made her way to the door. She hesitated a moment, still not sure what she was going to say to him, but urged herself forward and finally pushed open the door. Her eyes swept to the hallways first, a frown on her lips as she didn't spot him - had she taken too long to come after him? Then they fell to the floor and saw him sitting there, like a watch guard. "You're an idiot," she said bluntly, staring down at him, her eyes dryer though a little red from crying, her face calmed now. "I'm not fragile, or weak, and I'm certainly not stupid. No one, not even you, would take advantage of me unless I gave in on purpose." She resented his thoughts, in a way. She was stronger than what he suddenly felt, she knew she was, and to have him thinking of her like some little china doll made her want to show him just how much of one she wasn't.
She frowned, moving out of the doorway and letting it swing shut behind her, moving to her knees in front him, her eyes seeking out his own. "I might never have realized I felt anything for you if you didn't put me in that position," she said softly, shaking her head, "I don't work that way. You could have been waiting for something that would never come, because sadly, I just.. I ignore things I don't understand." She was admitting flaws to him, and she hoped he understood that and what it meant. She didn't like her flaws, especially not ones that concerned her and her perception. "I gave in to you because it felt right, not because I was scared, no matter what you think. You gave me enough time to realize that, sort out what I wanted." Her hand twitched at her side, resisting, perhaps, the urge to reach out and touch his face. She couldn't stand to see him pull away if she tried.
The fact that she knew he cared had been part of the reason that she had even bothered to try this, because an hour ago she thought he didn't give a rat's a** about her. The fact that he loved her was what made her take those final steps out the door. Even with all that in mind, she knew he was still troubled, and if he pulled away from her touch one more time, she wasn't sure what the pieces of her heart would do. She felt calmer, but they were still raw and bruised.
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Posted: Sun Jun 08, 2008 4:25 pm
He should've gotten up and left. Honestly, what was he even doing still there, leaning against the wall? Wasn't the whole purpose of him leaving the pool to just let her go? Hadn't this whole experience jus taught him he was simply not fit to be of any companionship? Maybe, rather than sit here, he should've gone to try and fetch someone to teach him how to treat others. But then again, what was the use? No longer any need for him to do so, he figured.
Nuka had found that he'd been so lost in his thoughts that he barely noticed Anana emerging from the pool till she was looming over him. For a moment, he stared at her, blinking, as if honestly confused; amusingly enough, the first thought that crossed his mind was how ironic it was that she was looming over HIM for a change. Her blunt words finally reached his dulled brain, and after a second's pause, the boy scowled up at her, "Thank you, I needed that," sarcasm dripped off him as he turned to look away; it was his turn to do so, seeing as how she'd practically done the same when he'd attempted to explain himself back inside.
However, the moment she kneeled down in front of him, his head turned to face her, unbidden and Nuka kicked himself mentally. It was like a magnetic force. He couldn't help it; he'd tried to stop himself from just staring at her for weeks, and it'd been in vain. He honestly had no bloody idea how she'd not noticed him staring at her whenever she turned to look away. Most people noticed his heated gaze on them; had anyone asked him personally, the boy would have been forced to say that for a genius, Anana was rather ******** dense. He was socially stunned; what was her excuse?
As she talked, he remain silent, his gaze shifting just so to lower towards her hand as it twitched. His jaws clenched and unclenched, the muscles working rather obviously under the skin as he fought himself, rather unsure of what to do and how to handle the situation.... how to handle her. Then, the moment passed, and the boy shifted; it almost seemed like he was going to get up and leave, however, nothing further from the truth. Slowly, Nuka lowered his head till his forehead hit her shoulder, his bangs and hair obscuring his face from her; at least that simple contact meant he'd accepted her words, if anything, "I don't know what you want from me. What do you want from me? What is it you want?" it was whispered gruffly against her, "Tell me. Just tell me, and I'll do it."
There was a brief pause then, and even quieter, he spoke again, "What DO you feel anyhow..." he realised he'd dropped the bomb on her and she hadn't even been given a chance to answer.
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Posted: Sun Jun 08, 2008 4:51 pm
She thought he had been about to get up, and for a moment she felt fear in the core of her stomach. Then, surprised yet again by his change of actions, he instead shifted to lean forward and lay his head on her shoulder. She let out a soft breath, feeling as if some sort of tension between them had finally broken, and slowly brought her arms up to wrap them around his chest as tightly as she could. For a moment she simply hugged herself to him, breathing in deeply, burying her face against his shoulder. She could pretend she was as strong as she wanted to be, but she needed him, needed his comfort.
"I don't want anything from you, Nuka, I just want.. you," she said finally, picking her head up to talk better, though she couldn't really see his face at all where he lay. She shook her head slowly, sending the curling waves of her dark hair shaking around her. "That's all I wanted today, was for you to hold me, acknowledge something at least. You can't know what it felt like to.. make a decision like that, last night, and then have you show up today acting like.." She bit her lip as she trailed off, turning her eyes to look down at her own lap instead. If she thought about it too hard, she might start crying again, so fresh were the feelings and the thoughts.
"What do I feel?" she said with a soft laugh, almost unbelieving as she shut her eyes for a moment. She had been feeling many things; hurt, pained, broken, used. She knew what he meant, though - what did she feel towards him? He had professed his love for her, if in a slightly less than meaningful way, with his back to her and proverbial tail pretty much tucked between his legs. "I.. love you, Nuka. It took me longer to realize it, and I would have told you sooner if you hadn't started acting like a crazed maniac." She certainly couldn't say it to him when he was pinning boys up against the locker for looking at her too long, could she?
She knew people were likely to see now, now that they were out in the open, but let them. Sure, they had been seen together before, but not like this, and she knew soon enough the rumors were going to start spreading. She hoped it didn't mean more bad news for him. Now that she knew she was the cause of so many of his fights, so many of his bruises and scrapes, she didn't know what to think. She couldn't stop them, and she could do nothing to make them any better. It was because of that, that long train of thoughts and fears, that she glanced over her shoulder to see if any of his friends and/or enemies happened to be lurking near.
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Posted: Sun Jun 08, 2008 6:14 pm
He had no idea why he felt slightly surprised when her arms came to wrap around him; he shouldn't have. It was only natural, after all, for her to do such a thing. Not only did it comfort him in the time of need (physical contact had a way of doing that), but it must've also soothed her, and whatever hurt she'd been feeling due to his action. Regardless of what he should've felt or not, Nuka found himself stiffening slightly, and for a moment his brain screamed at him to bolt, to run while he still could because this was, without a doubt, deeper water and there was no way he'd be able to swim out of it later.
The thoughts were swiftly dismissed though as she buried her face against his shoulder; his frame relaxed back down then and the boy closed his eyes, allowing the sensation of her against him to wash over him. She chose that moment to start talking though, and he forced his eyes open instantly, almost as if keeping them shut even when she couldn't see them, were some sort of offense against her. As her words dawned on him, Nuka refrained his movement; all what passed was the twitching of his shoulders, as if he'd been about to move but had stilled himself.
However, no sooner was she done speaking that he pulled his head away from her shoulder and reached out with his arms, trying to unbalance her so she'd fall against him. This done, he wrapped his arms around her form and for a moment, stilled all actions, as if he'd honestly missed the feel of her against him when it'd not even been twenty four hours since. After a moment's pause though, he weakened the grip he had on her, enough so that she'd be able to push away if she wished to, "Why are you even willing anyhow... you shouldn't be. Why are you even here? I really don't deserve you," it was said more as an after thought, as if voicing his thoughts out loud. Clicking his tongue over his teeth, he shook his head, clearing it, then shifted them so she could see him, placing his forehead against her, "Bear with me. I'm not used to this," almost pleading; he too was admitting to faults. Not like she didn't know about them anyhow. The words were followed by a frown, a sulk almost written on his lips, making him look childish even now; quite contradicting from the emotions his eyes held, "I don't like them looking at you. I'm not apologising for that. I'm apologising for pushing you away, not for the other stuff."
Had he had dog ears, one could have bet their life they would've been stubbornly pressed against his head, flattened in the face of his jealousy.
Despite his words, Nuka must've caught onto how she looked over her shoulder, because just as she did so, he followed her gaze, momentarily confused till it dawned onto him just what she was doing, "I don't give a damn. Let them talk. Let them come," because he had something to fight for, if the fight came looking for him. He had someone to protect, and that just made him all the stronger. It was hilarious to note he'd honestly not partaken in fights (the one incident that same morning aside), since he'd met her. He'd not initiated even one. They'd all come to snap at him and all what he'd done was defend himself half-heartedly. He had no intentions of running out to look for a fight; he had discovered when he'd met her that there were better things to occupy his time doing.
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Posted: Sun Jun 08, 2008 10:04 pm
As soon as his arms reached out for her, she leaned against his body, scooting herself closer and falling from her knees down into a sitting position so that she could curl up more comfortably against his form. When he weakened his grip, she simply remained cuddled where she was, content to lay in his arms until he made her do otherwise. She still felt raw emotionally, her heart felt mended, but she could still feel where all the little pieces had been broken. She knew it was a big adjustment, she couldn't flip back into feeling perfectly happy again immediately, but she knew now that things had been fixed. She'd be able to pick it up, and move on, become whatever it was the two of them seemed to be evolving into. The thought made her smile, as she sat there leaned against him, and she knew everything was going to work itself out.
"I don't know why," she said with a soft laugh, shutting her eyes so that she wouldn't roll them in amusement. Why had she fallen for the biggest a*****e in the school? Why was she in love with someone that was so completely opposite of everything she had ever imagined for herself? She couldn't have answered that any better than he could have, but where as he was questioning it, she was accepting it. "All that matters is that I am here, I am willing, and all I want in the world right now is to be with you," her words were soft, some of them still a touch hesitant - she still wasn't cut out for this 'share your feelings' kind of thing. "It doesn't matter if you think you deserve me or not, I want you, and you'll have me, end of story," a smirk touched upon her lips at this, her eyes drifting up to meet his, as her words had been said with a touch of humor to them. "I guess the heart has a sick sense of humor, Nuka, but I'm not complaining. What happened, happened, and here we are." She curled her arms tighter around him for emphasis, still unable to grasp just how soothing it felt just to be close to him again.
As he leaned his forehead against hers, she sat up a little, nodding just barely at his words so that she wouldn't make his own head bob about. She listened, calmly, one of her hands idly stroking a finger against his spine where she could feel it through his shirt. "Alright," she said softly, accepting his apology though she wasn't really sure if she was ready just yet to get over it. It had hurt, and he had no right to treat her that way. She still needed time to mend herself, but his apology was a good start, and that was enough for her. "And you can be angry all you want at them for looking at me, I suppose, just.. you don't have to go around throwing them into things, ok?" She quirked an eyebrow at him, hoping he understood that, really, she didn't like standing around waiting for him while he threatened some poor git within an inch of his life just for looking at her a second too long.
She smiled weakly as he said that, her cheeks turning just a touch pink. She hadn't meant for him to realize what she was doing, because she didn't want him to know that she was worried about him or what would happen. She uncurled one arm from around him and reached up slowly to put a hand on his cheek. "I just don't want to see you hurt anymore," she said lightly, which was truly all she cared about. Now that she knew he had been beaten down because of her, because of whatever he refused to do, it made her feel terrible. She'd know that every bruise, every scrape on him was because of her. Leaning up, she pressed a kiss against is lips, despite her own thoughts. There was nothing to be done, and if he wanted to risk it for them, then she had no reason to stop him.
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Posted: Mon Jun 09, 2008 1:29 am
That was all he needed to hear it seemed, because the boy closed his eyes and nodded slightly against her. Granted, he knew things were still iffy in many sectors, but the world could have been damned for all he cared. At least at the current moment.
When she brought up the earlier stunt he'd pulled (in all honesty he'd been worked up, frustrated, angry and that guy had ******** brushed against her just the wrong way), where he'd practically smashed someone against a locker, he frowned, "I'll try," he lowered his gaze from her eyes as he answered; he couldn't promise just yet, because if she'd gotten anything right out of the whole situation, it was that he probably really was a guard dog, in more than one way. Which meant it'd probably be a while before he came around entirely. It was all a matter of time though, no doubt.
Hurt. Huh.
It was almost ironically amusing; he'd done nothing but get hurt, and hurt others in return, for no reason at all, for as far as he could think. There hadn't even been any logical or rational thought in the decision. It'd been as simple as 'fights made him feel alive and entertained him', so he'd gone along with it. And now, there was someone that didn't want him to get hurt; something about that notion was hilarious to him to such an extent he smirked against her, "Let them come," he told her again, this time with a self confident note, "I won't let anyone hurt you," as she leaning in to kiss him, he eagerly responded. After a moment though, during which their mouths were linked, the boy pause, made a small noise in the back of his throat and pulled away, looking awkwardly down, "Uhm..."
For a second he seemed to be trying to figure out how to tactfully put his thoughts to words, however, he soon enough gave up on that, "Not that I don't like it, but if you're wanting to run off to class anytime soon, uhh... don't do that," there, watch him be tactful.
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Posted: Mon Jun 09, 2008 10:38 am
"As long as you try," she said quite calmly, nodding her head. If he would try to calm down, try to chill out, then that was all she could ask of him. She couldn't say that she even understood one tenth of what he was feeling, because she couldn't fathom being so over protective of him. Sure, thinking of him with other girls, it made her blood boil a little, but them glancing at him wrong or bumping into him in a crowded hallway didn't make her go over the edge and freak out. She supposed she had to learn, just as much as he, to find a compromise. She'd have to learn to live with his over protectiveness and he'd have to learn to tone it down a little.
As he again simply said that they could come, more or less of that bring it on attitude, she found herself smirking lightly. She hoped he wasn't reckless about it, and she knew he probably wouldn't be. Maybe, after time, they'd all just forget him and leave him alone. She didn't know what she could do to make the situation any better, and he had resided himself to his fate it seemed.
When he broke the kiss, that small noise was enough to tell her everything she needed to know before he even bothered to say those words. It wasn't something too she was too unfamiliar with since last night, and she let out a soft laugh as he looked down, her eyes following briefly for only a moment. However, at his words, her eyes did widen slightly and she almost fell over in her rush to get to her feet.
"Crap, Class," she muttered, realizing by now that she was probably late. She leaned down to give him a swift kiss on the cheek, then wrenched open the pool room door. "I've got to get going, I'll see you afterwards, alright?" Rushing back in to get her bag, she gave him a swift smile as she came back out, and made her quick way to class.
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Posted: Mon Jun 09, 2008 1:13 pm
Nuka watched almost as if fascinated when the girl pulled away from him instantly at the mention of class. Blinking, he managed to simply arch a brow when she cursed as she pressed a tender kiss and left, "Right," there was no doubt she wouldn't hear the word; still, he sounded rather bemused, "Right," he repeated before he paused and looked down, rolling his eyes in something akeen to frustration as he shoved his hands in his pockets and walked down the hall to the bathroom.
Right.
No way he was going to class like that.
~ - ~ - ~
'Afterwards', as Anana had put it, found Nuka panicked once more, reminiscence of that very same morning, albeit for different reasons. After leaving the bathrooms, the had swiftly decided that after the emotional turmoil, he was NOT going to class (percussion instruments were bound to give him a damned headache if he went). In the end, he'd found himself skipping class, opting instead for slipping out of the school for a much needed stroll.
After all, that way, the people still looking to give him a piece of their mind back at school, wouldn't find him, and on top of that, he thought he'd try to buy Anana some small present to make up for his behavior that day. All in all, it seemed to Nuka like a win win situation.
He hadn't been expecting the strange... repercussions the evening had on him, and had anyone forewarned him, it was likely he'd have laughed in their face. Then again, he could not be blamed, for whom would have believed he'd find himself hiding in an alleyway beside the school gates, partially obscured by the shadows, hoping against all hope that he'd be able to tug Anana into the darkness with him without being spotted by the rest of students?
The reason he was hiding still seemed surreal to him (and honestly, he had no idea how it'd even happened, and he could've sworn against all odds that he was NOT high and this could NOT be happening!). Swirling rhythmically as he eyed the students from within the darknes... innocently perched and half hidden amongst the the array of messy steel blue hair were two strange, furry appendages; canine ears. Or rather, wolf hears, he thought to himself as he paused just briefly to look behind him; sprouting from a hole he'd had to create in his pants was a furry tail that seemed to accompany the ears. He'd bought a baseball cap (which curently lay on the floor beside him) the moment he'd noticed things going wrong, and had taken off his jacket, tying it around his waist in an effort to his the strange features.
Regardless, he could not even begin to phantom what was going on. Still half panicked, he reached out of the darkness as soon as Anana walked by, pulling her into the alley way rather forcefully with him, covering her mouth least she scream as he did so, "What the s**t is wrong with me?!" there was desperation in his voice as he turned her slightly in his arms so she could face him.
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Posted: Mon Jun 09, 2008 1:40 pm
To be honest, class had gone rather pleasantly for Ana. She had been able to, more or less, concentrate on her work. She still thought about him, but not enough to distract her from what she was supposed to be doing, and by the end of the day she felt better than she had going into it. The only problem she found was that when she left her classroom, Nuka wasn't there waiting for her like he usually was. Even before today, he had always been there, as a part of their deal (and as she had learned, recently, something else), and for him to have slipped up seemed awkward.
At first, her mind slipped instantly to the worst possible scenario. Someone had cornered him and had, indeed, decided to beat the s**t out of him for what had happened. Not only were things worse than before, but they had displayed it openly for the first time. She grit her teeth, shouldering her bag, and pushed her way through the crowd of students milling around. Unsurprisingly, even without him there, they seemed to steer away from her (especially after Nuka's earlier behavior.
As she pushed open the doors to the school, taking the steps quickly, and exited the school, her eyes kept peeled for any sign of a stir. What she didn't count on, however, were the arms that reached out to grab her and drag her into the dark alley. She did let out a yelp, out of pure surprise and fear (at least until she realized whose arms were around her) as she felt herself pulled away into the darkness. Turning on him once he'd let go, she at first thought to berate him for scaring the s**t out of her, because she didn't know what in the hell reason he had for doing something like that. When she opened her mouth to say something, however, his own words spilled over hers and she was left baffled.
She paused, judging the desperation in his voice, and took a step back to examine him. What in the world was he going on about? Then, her eyes drifted up to look at the very obvious things that were out of place atop his head, and her back slipped down from her shoulder to land with a hard thud on the ground. Her eyebrows shot up in surprise, eyes widened a little. For a moment, she didn't speak, stunned by the sight. She noticed, too, the bulge behind him and the faint hints of fure - a tail too?
"What.." she began, cleared her throat. "What did you do, Nuka?" she said again, taking a step closer as she looked up, not at his eyes, but at those ears that rested atop his head. Part of her felt so stunned by them, by the fact that they existed. Part of her wanted to touch them, instead, as was noted by the faint twitch in the fingers of her hand as it hung at her side.
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