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It had been some time since Odile had been fit enough mentally to venture from the small cavern she had found solace in, after her encounter with the kalona female, Zulimar. The events that had transpired that day had driven the angeni nearly to the point of true, irrevocable insanity and had also nearly cost Odile her life. Though death would have- in Odile's opinion at least- granted her the absolution she was looking for in the apparent death of her little sister, it was not her fate to have been slain that day. Nor any of the other times she had challenged her own mortality. The rejections were innumerable, and the angeni had truly begun to wonder if she was a failure even at dying.

High above her, Rothbart circled, watching her with his keen eyes. Odile could feel it, a chill running down her spine. The hawk never let her be, stalked her say and night. Recently she had gained the ability to drive him off, so he never settled himself on her back, tearing at her flesh as he used to. He no longer even harried her wings, ripping the feathers out.

It was cold, Odile decided, folding her wings back along her body as best she could. But she couldn't drive herself back inside, instead choosing to stand in the middle of the plain, watching the clouds drift between herself and the stars. Somewhere up there, perhaps, her parents rested. Up high above, in the heavens, where she would never be able to go again, afraid of the judgement that waited her there.

A flash of white to the side caught Odile's ever-watching eye, and she turned her head to stare at the approaching figure, paralyzed for a moment before she backed up slowly, shyly. The mare that approached was beautiful, and in the moonlight she gleamed witha look of purity that Odile never had. She didn't at first catch the pitiful, terrified whimpers that were coming from her throat as the other angeni moved closer, but when she did, she stopped them.

Her entire body was shaking so hard she could barely move, and the approaching figure hadn't been aggressive in the least. Odile shifted her weight, pale turquoise eyes watching now. Waiting. The one approaching wasn't Nimue, the one who sang of death and vengeance. It was someone else, and it was quite the shock for Odile to feel a swift shudder run through her of the person she'd been once.

It took a moment for the shaking to stop, but when it did, she felt herself moving forward, against her will. Rothbart screamed above her, a harsh warning to Odile to turn back, but the mare ignored it. She'd known two others in her life that pale, and the hope that it was either one of them was a suffocating relief. It was just... so hard to see her, from this distance. And it had been too long. So Odile closed the distance nervously, dancing forward in a movement that made it clear how nervous she was at the proximity of another living being.

She skipped forward, every step she took in the forward direction almost physically painful. Still, she pressed forward desperately, determined to get even a little contact...

The voice that hit her ears was a sharp disappointment, and Odile felt her heart fall. Now she stopped her forward movement, turquoise eyes landing on the other female. "She is Odile." her voice was harsh, rough and broken from misuse. But the other... Angel's voice rang sweet in Odile's ears, be it from the sheer beauty of it being another voice, she couldn't tell. "It is unfortunate that she is the one you met. She is sorry." she skittered backwards nervously, avoiding the hawk diving at her. The hawk's claw caught at her hair, ripping a piece out, and she didn't scream. Odile couldn't feel the pain he caused. Not anymore.

It was habit, now, to speak of herself as if she were another person entirely. "She does not look at the night anymore." the mare lifted her head, nosing at the sky where the bird circled. "He doesn't like her being out at night, you see."

Rothbart squawked defiance at Angel making a threatening diving action, but continued to swirl around the two up above, not approaching more than about ten feet above them. For Odile's part, she watched Angel with an almost awestruck expression, shocked and slightly pleased that first, the mare thought of her as a pleasure? And next, that the other angeni would provide a measure of protection against Odile's tormenter.

She wasn't sure if the pleasure would show in her eyes or expression, but she did scoot forward closer to Angel, though not far. "She only wanted to let you know. They may not like you speaking to her, up there." One wing pointed towards the sky. "She has left, you see, because she was unworthy. A sinner." Instinct had her skittering away again, trying to get more space between herself and the other mare.

There was a few moments of silence again, with Odile obviously thinking about how to formulate what she was trying to say. "And Rothbart is with her because he is her penance. He found her, and he is how she pays for her sins. She has a long time left to spend with him, and obeying him means that he causes her less pain."

Her head tilted, and a flicker of amusement danced through her eyes, disappearing as quickly as it came. A genuine spark of life there, for the first time in a while. "She thinks that you must be very lucky in your loved ones, if the family can care enough about each other to live here together. She is..." How could Odile express such sorrow she felt, at the cruelty of those Angel had known? No such cruelty had happened in Odile's small herd. Instead she chose to express it in the way she moved, stepping closer to Angel instinctively, in a way meant to comfort. It was foiled, she was sure, by her instinctive flinch, and the way she backed up quickly.

"She is sorry, Angel. That your family had to know so much sadness, because of the cruelty of sinners who have not been caught and tried." her eyes narrowed, wings fluffing up in outrage. "If she were still in heaven, she would have been more than happy to have seen punishment dealt for the loss you suffered." Then her wings drooped, and she looked broken. "But she is just as guilty as those who would be punished."

As for Rothbart, being so brutally chastised by the white mare on the ground, he flew above the two, watching with predatory eyes, instinct ingrained in him by the ease of torturing Odile making him eye Angel's spotless hide maliciously. A defiant squawk erupted from his lips, and he did a threatening dive right above her head, clawed feet clenching and unclenching reflexively.

Odile missed his gesture, trying to decide how, or if, to tell her story to the white mare. "She... is uncertain where to start." her body twitched and she pranced in a circle, unsure where to go. "There is much that would have to be said, before she is confident that one would understand what it is that she wants to say. Her excuses first, even though she doesn't deserve to make them."

"She thinks you are too forgiving." Odile advised her in careful tones, with worried eyes. "They hurt your family, and took away years that will never be gotten back! You confuse her with your talk of sets of morals. The laws her herd lived by were clear, and required no different sets of ideas and morals for them to be deciphered. So while these 'sets' of morals may be preferred, it did not change what was and was not cruel." Though again, she didn't know what had been done. It was more the word torture that made her cringe.

Was torture what would have awaited her, if she'd stayed by the small body long enough to... know? She couldn't have stood by watching the accusation on the faces of her family, telling her she'd failed. The world started spinning around her, Angel fading in and out of her vision, the trees whirling, and Odile started muttering to herself, trying to keep her world in order, and make it stop the spinning.

From an outside viewpoint, she was only moving in a tight figure eight, grumbling, with wide, confused eyes. "Picky... Angry... Painful... Nosy... Screaming..." were words that it was certain the other angeni would hear from the mass of them that were mumbled. Finally Odette stopped, frozen, staring the other way, almost expectantly. There was a turn of the black head from side to side, and then Odile turned around to face Angel, a faint flush tingeing the silver on her cheeks.

"She has decided she will tell you her story." She said finally. "But it will be hard for her to remain... impartial. She will try though, and if you have any questions, please ask her, so she can explain." Odile nodded firmly. "She was an only child for many years, and it was her parent's sorrow. She looked like her father, mostly, with a touch of her mother in her. And she was loved, beyond a shadow of a doubt, forgiven for all mistakes, though reprimanded when necessary, as was proper. However, the rest of the herd did not like her as much, for she was uncertain as to how she should deal with them, and looked alien to them, with her dark body.

"When she was a mare grown, and ready for a family of her own, it was announced that her mother was with foal again. A sister was born again, and she was like their mother, purest white, but their father's golden markings on her body. They named her Odette, and the filly was the light against Odette's black, and from the beginning, she was loved by more than just their parents. The others of their herd adored her, for her personality was the purest among them, the sweetest, and she had a kind word for everyone. And Odette loved her sister, Odile. Odette would follow her around for hours, until their mother had to drag the filly back, to give the mare some peace."

She took a breath, shaking her head, and bit her lip again. Tears were stinging her eyes, and it was hard to focus. "So much love given to Odile, and it was all thrown away because of something childish, and foolish."

It hurt. It really hurt, and she could feel Rothbart above her, watching with annoyance that she hadn't run, and left Angel behind. Still, it was a staggering relief to have found another companion who could hold the bird at bay. "No one could have loved her as Odette did." There was firm conviction in her tone. "No one else spent the time with her, asked the questions Odette did, or tried to know her. How can you love someone you do not know, or who does not know you? It makes even the ones that you love as ignorant of your needs as the stranger flying through your cloud."

The quiet, peaceful debate was soothing, sparking corners of Odile's mind that had lay long dormant. "For her, it was not only looking different, it was THINKING different. It set her apart from all of them in ways, and even though her body parts were right, her insides weren't." She ducked her head. "And it was proven on that one day, when she ran away from heaven."

She took a deep breath, pondering her next words. "It was storming, and she had never tested winds quite like these. She set out, and Odette followed. Odile thought nothing of it, at first, because of her desire for company, and her vain thought that if something went wrong, she would be able to catch Odette, and take her to safety. So for a while the two sisters danced in the storm, and it was beautiful. But Odette was still a filly, and she asked Odile to take her home. She refused, telling Odette that 'the baby could find her own way home.' It was silly, and a childish taunt, but Odette stayed with her, determined to prove her wrong. Odile could see her sister's exhaustion, but she was having fun, and ignored the signs of distress, until Odette started falling.

"Like Icarus, too close to the sun. Odette had flown too long, and though her body was light, and her wings flapped as much as she could, she was exhausted, and the strength soon ran dry on Odette. She spun for the earth, and Odile could do nothing. She tried to catch Odette, diving as fast as she could, as sharp as she could, desperately trying. Prayers were sent to all of the dieties whose names she could remember in such a short time, but it was too late. Odette hit the tops of the trees, tearing through them, and they pierced the filly. She could hear the sound of breaking bones, and smell the blood from where she circled the treetops, trying to find a safe way to get to her sister, afraid of the darkness under the trees. Finally she found a way to her."

She shivered, remembering the mangled lump of flesh that she had found there. "Odette was broken, bloodied, and could not even scream. So she did it for Odette, screaming, bringing attention from predators, and healers. Odile tried to save her, but the smell, and the sight of what she had done, through her sins..." A single tear fell from one eye, even though Odile wasn't shaking from her sobs. "She fled when Odette stopped moving, committing even one final crime. She left the body to be devoured, too afraid for her own skin to protect the body of her little sister. Too afraid to wait, until her parents found them."

Turning away from Angel, Odile shook her head. "This is why you were unfortunate to meet her today. You stand before one who is guilty of the sins of pride, murder, and cowardice. That is why Rothbart punishes her. It is a punishment as fits the crime."

Her eyes closed, and a single tear escaped from her eye. There was silence in Odile's head right now, for the first time since she had fled. "Those are a lot of crimes, Angel." She couldn't imagine such love coming from anyone, for anyone. "And it can be understood how they are worse then mine. I only killed one person." She was speaking slowly, trying to think past the silence she wasn't used to anymore, so barely noticed that she was speaking in a completely different manner. "Nevertheless, it was murder of a child. Even an accident for which I was at fault would not have kept me from being exiled."

It was kinder for her parents to think she had died with Odette. She opened her eyes and looked at the other mare. "She was only a child, Angel, and I was fully grown. I was irresponsible, and wanted to prove I was better than a little girl. I know it was a mistake, but I killed a child out of jealousy. Did your son ever do that?" She wasn't playing a game of 'I'm more evil than you', this son of Angel's had won that. He had killed 6 or more to Odile's 1 accidental murder... And it wasn't that she didn't understand what Angel was trying to say, she did.

It was that the understanding of this mare hurt her, tore open wounds she thought had scabbed open long ago, and made her bleed anew.

Made her mourn again the small life she had so helplessly snuffed out.