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Though the days warmth still lingered, the sun sat low in the sky. Slanting golden light filtered in through the dappled canopy overhead, and any other time Elle would have appreciated how it cast appaloosa spots along the tops of Lonan's dark wings. Today, however, she was a little distracted.

"This is it." The low rock cliff faced east, darkened by the sun setting at its back. Elle nodded towards a dark, angling gap between two living slabs, and curled one hand around Lonan's arm for comfort. Dark, true dark, had always made her uneasy.

Their picnic gear rested near one of the trees, a short measure from the slender cave mouth. All Elle carried was a small gathering jar and an emergency flashlight, tucked into the sling bag she wore against her right side. "And this is what we're looking for." She set a tiny, dry, twisted bit of cave lotus root into the palm of Lonan's hand. "The little blossoms glow, but they close in the light. And a bud looks a lot like a pebble."

Elle's explanation sounded a bit apologetic. She smoothed her hand down the inside of Lonan's arm, still standing close as they faced the mossy cliff. With any luck, it would be a quick gathering trip. She wanted to be out of the dark, and out of her shoes, as quickly as possible.

Neither felt quite right.

For a moment, Elle simply gazed up sidelong at him. She felt every sweet comfort he offered, accepted every reassurance, and appreciated them all. Lonan's kind words soothed her, just as he'd intended, but the underlying imbalance refused to vanish.

It had been growing stronger, ever since she realized she'd run out of the root. For years now it had kept the dreams at bay, kept her calm, collected. Now, though, the darkness edged her vision, even in waking. It had always been this way. The dreams, the memories, all of the tumult had been calmed by one, simple, flower.

A flower she no longer possessed.

Elle had dealt with the loss for months, now. It sharpened her empathy, being free of it, but the lack of sleep and the constant haunting remembrances wore at her deeply. Taking a long breath, she rested her head against Lonan's shoulder, and finally smiled.

"Yes. Let's get this done." She brushed her chin lightly upwards, along his arm, tilting her face back for a kiss. It had taken a whlie to get used to his newness, after the wakening, but the connection had never changed. "Thank you."

**

It disturbed her. The light had faded much sooner than she would have guessed. Less than one hundred feet, just a few turns and dips in, and the only light was a dim charcoal suggestion of edges and corners. She'd been here only once before, with Frae, and the old woman had been as surefooted as a satyr. Elle tried to hold Lonan's hand loosely, but her instinct was to grip.

"They're...further in. We cross a stream, first, before the turn." Something clicked, like two tiny rocks against one another, from the back of the stretch of tunnel they walked in. Elle took another breath, and closed her eyes. It reminded her far too much of the time in between.

She walked carefully, slowly at his side...feeling in some way more vulnerable with shoes on than without. The idea of a misstep, of falling forever in weightless limbo was an irrational fear, but it played somewhere deep in Elle's memory. She was grateful for the wing pressed gently against her, and leaned into Lonan's side as they stopped for a moment to rest.

As he pressed the jar into her hands, Elle's eyes opened slowly. For a moment, the fireflies looked like dancing afterimages...ghosts of the dappled sun she'd left behind. As she focused, though, and saw them for what they were, Elle's lips curved into the hint of a smile. "Thank you." They were perfect, like sparks from a campfire, flitting up gently to the cork before letting their light dim.

Elle held them close with her free hand, against her chest, as though the light could do more than help guide her way. Even she could hear the slight trickle of the stream, now. They were getting close to the turn.

"It gets...uneven. Then opens into a big space, with stone columns and bats." At the mention of them, Elle smiled again, still hugging her jar close. "I always had to go on alone, from there. Frae never made it past the bats. She hates bats, scared to death of them." At least that wasn't a fear she shared!

Elle nodded in the darkness, still clutching the jar against her chest as though it provided some spiritual warmth. There was truly no other light, now...and even the slightest luminescence could wash out the glow she was looking for.

They slowed as they approached the stream, and Elle turned herself over fully to Lonan's guidance. Without fail, he found the ledge where the water was shallowest, and she followed him across with her eyes squeezed shut. The noises were slight and confusing to her, without sight...she did not receive the clear picture Lonan did. All Elle received was uncertainty, and a growing appreciation for the man at her side. "I'm...I'm across."

He knew that, but it was an affirmation mainly to herself. Still holding his hand tightly, Elle reclaimed her warm place against his side and let her eyes open in the darkness. "That wasn't as hard as- oh, there! I see one!"

She tucked the firefly jar under one arm carefully, before even their gentle light washed out the glow of the blossom. It was too late, though, it seemed...when she looked back for the tiny blue wash, where wall met floor, it was gone. The secretive little blossom had closed. "Oh~. Well, it was right here..."

Elle froze, grip tightening on Lonan's arm as he mentioned the ledge. For a moment, she swayed, vertigo washing over her. "Thank you." To her own ears, her voice sounded very far away.

Elle took one breath, gathering courage, and let it out, dispelling her fear. Most of it, anyway. It was a trick Aki had taught her, a kind of instant meditation, but it only helped a little. It was Lonan's steady presence beside her that truly made the difference. "I need...as many as we can gather, without...harming them. I don't want to come back any time soon."

She paused to bring the firefly jar up just a bit, letting a tiny crack of the glow emerge from where she kept it covered. Elle watched them rise and fall for a moment, flickering as they reached the lid. There were many more of them than she thought...they simply didn't light all at once. That thought gave her some comfort. Even they had to accept the dark!

"It's safe to take one for every three we find. The root is the most important." It took some juggling, but she managed to pop open the sample jar and place the lotus inside. Handling them for too long, unprocessed, had...adverse effects.

"There is a bottleneck, to the side somewhere. It leads into the big chamber. It's going to be kind of narrow for you, Lonan. I'm sorry."

Distracted as she was, Elle didn't hear the sound of rough rock against wing. Lonan was right...the knowledge would have worried her deeply, and Elle was already concerned enough. Instead, she tightened her hand on his and squeezed by...noting how the jagged walls pressed against her in places they'd simply brushed by before. Age and good living certainly left their mark!

As Lonan spoke, she nodded, forgetting herself for a moment. "O-okay." She still held the jar tightly in her other hand, but didn't actually take Lonan's advice. If a blossom didn't glow, it was immature, and thus dangerous...she still wished to keep an eye on the gathering process. It didn't seem like something that she needed to mention, though. Not only could she weed them out later, she had faith in Lonan's abilities. She'd seen him paint, after all.

"I think...it's just the emptiness that bothers me." Elle spoke quietly, but her voice still echoed lightly in the vast chamber. Lonan guided them flawlessly past the massive stone columns, but Elle still flinched every time she felt the cool radiance of the stone pass just by her cheek. "Do you remember? The time in between? I remember...longing. Wanting so badly to be back."

For years, she couldn't remember what she wanted to come back for. It was only recently, since the lotus ran short, that the memories began to whisper. So many little faces, so many years...

Elle smiled slowly, listening to the soft tune as she relaxed against Lonan. Suddenly, her fear seemed almost silly...what was there to fear, really? It wasn't the dark, or the danger, or the uncertainty. It was the fear of being lost, forgotten and helpless. Lonan made those worries seem very far away, indeed.

"Thank you." She didn't speak until he quieted for a moment, and gave his arm a sidelong squeeze against her body. "A perfect remedy. I think...I'd like to sit for a moment. I'm sure you'll move easier without me for a bit, anyway."

The little smile in her voice was audible. Elle's fingers graced one of the natural stone columns, and she put her back against it...handing the gathering jar carefully to Lonan. "Please, be careful. They won't harm you, but they quiet your emotions, and make you thick. Sleepy. Handle them as little as possible?" Once the jar was in his hands, Elle leaned forward, kissing the back of Lonan's hands before sliding downward to sit with her back resting against the column.

"It's ironic, isn't it? That my first memory is of a cellar, yet I still don't care for the dark." Something occurred to her, and Elle squinted into the darkness, trying to listen for Lonan as she spoke quiety. "What was your first memory? Your reflection, here? Do you know?"