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 Posted: Thu Mar 20, 2008 5:41 pm
I have been wiccan for about two years now, and I haven't yet told my parents. I want to tell my mom because she is a fairly open-minded person and I think that she would not get all stressed. My dad, on the other hand, would be quite annoyed if he found out. I tell my mom everything (well, almost everything!) and I hate keeping a big secret from her. So, do you guys have any suggestions as to what I might say to her? confused
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Posted: Thu Mar 20, 2008 5:57 pm
I actually just recently "came out" to my mother. I wish it had been under better, more pleasant circumstances, but oh well. I basically explained most of the beliefs, and de-bunked, so to speak, some of the common misconceptions people have regarding pagans. She ended up asking a lot of questions, and got rather upset (which was almost expected...). She asked if I had any other "pagan friends I talk to", and I talked to her about this guild. There are still a lot of things she doesn't understand, and somehow I don't think she plans on taking the time to find out...
That's all I can really say...
I wish you the best of luck!
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Posted: Thu Mar 20, 2008 6:13 pm
I don't really have much personal experience with that. My mom found out by seeing something in room. The conversation consisted of "I want you to start go to church with me again." I replied with, "No." And that's how we left it. We don't discuss it. I don't think my dad even knows. But, here's a website that has some tips for talking to your parents about it. Read it, it might be helpful to you: http://www.paganspath.com/magik/child.htm
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Posted: Fri Mar 21, 2008 2:30 pm
I did it by blurting "I'm a witch." No joke. After that I gave them a little "worksheet" that had the words Paganism, Wicca, Wiccan, Witch, and Heathen on it.
Let me tell you, it wasn't the best way to tell them. I have a picture of the Trinity Goddess on my desktop, Mom says it looks satanic and she still thinks I'm "anti-religious" and that "it's just a phase."
But whatever. If I was looking for their approval, I wouldn't have told them anyways.
Of course, you seem to have a better relationship with your mom than I do, so maybe showing her Scott Cunningham's The Truth About Witchcraft Today would be a good start.
The main thing, though, is read everything you can on the subject, then adapt everything to your situation--much like writing a new spell.
Good luck and Bright Blessings
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Posted: Fri Mar 21, 2008 5:08 pm
I don't have much experience with this subjects (my parents were the ones who actually introduced me to Wicca) but I'd say if you can just come out and tell her. Even though it's still keeping a secret tell her not to tell your dad until you think he might be a little more open minded to it. And again just read as much as you can on it and tell your mom to do the same if she doesn't understand =)
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Posted: Fri Mar 21, 2008 6:22 pm
I don't think I'm much help, cause I never actually came out and told my parents. I would wear my pentacle around them though, but they never ever mentioned it. To this day I'm not really sure if they know or not, though i think not because on easter my dad still tells me 'he is risen' and expects me to say 'he is risen indeed.' for all of you who know what that means... lol but i've never hidden it from them and if they've not figured it out already they will at my wedding/handfasting. rofl
but i digress.. since you seem to have a good relationship with your mother, just sit her down in your room or somewhere away from your dad and tell her. show her any books you might have that would help her understand, and explain why you chose this path. after that you can ask her if she thinks you should tell your father. i've known kids who one parent knew but the other didn't b/c they would kick the kid out the house or something drastic.
But BEST OF LUCK TO YOU! let us know how it goes!!! heart
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Posted: Fri Mar 21, 2008 6:23 pm
thank you to everyone! This has helped me lots. heart
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Posted: Fri Mar 28, 2008 1:01 am
Personally, I wouldn't.
My father, as a strict muslim, punched me in the face.
I had to fake Islam for several years, before I moved out.
See the thing is; Christianity and Islam are both ibrahamic; my father thought that if I wasn't a muslim, he'd go to hell. So be wary, your parents might panic. I think its best to stay low till you live alone and they can't do anything to you.
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Posted: Fri Apr 25, 2008 5:41 pm
Thank you to everyone who posted. I have now told my mom, but not my dad...yet.
We were in Sedona on our vacation last week, and that's where I told her. I started by asking her what she thought the main religeon in the area was. She said that it was probably wiccan, because there were so many new age shops. (we were near a vortex). Then I asked about what she believed about god, then asked her what she thought happened to you after you die. Next, I asked her what she thought MY religeon was...and since I was talking about wicca a little bit, she guessed wiccan...and it just went from there! She was totally fine with it.
I had bought a book a few days before (Spellcraft for Teens: A Magickal Guide to Writing & Casting Spells, by Gwinevere Rain). When I bought it, I got her not to look at it by saying it was a christmas present for her. But after I told her about me being wiccan, I told her that the book I got wasn't for her. I asked her if she would like to look at it sometime, and she said that she would...but she hasn't yet.
I asked her what she thought my dad would say if I told him, and she said that he would think that it was just a phase. I agree, but I also think that if he knew and I didn't tell him absolutely EVERYTHING about wicca, he would never act like he really trusted me. Well, I guess that I will cross that bridge when I come to it...
Well, thanks again to everyone who posted! You had some great advice.
biggrin
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Posted: Fri Apr 25, 2008 10:13 pm
Aww and i was gonna post an idea for telling her...ah well i'll do it for you to tell your dad. ok, I suggest telling him like you did your mother, except tell him not that it's wicca, but a more subtle version of christianity, or just flat out say unitarian, they're hippies like us wiccans, too! =D and it's more than one religion, they're Christian, some are mormon, Jehova's witnesses, catholic, islamic, you name it. other than that, if it doesn't work, tell your dad it isn't a phase, and you are in fact neopagan. that'll confuse him (unless he's a total book worm). anyway, my parents are both pagan, except my mom's a witch. so i don't have to hide it from them. But i do have to hide it from grandma. How should i break it to her without giving her her 50th heart attack? please PM me this answer!>< cus i hate lying to my gramma bout stuff...
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Posted: Sat Apr 26, 2008 7:12 am
I have a very similar problem! My mum is quite hard to talk to about change because she never really shares many interests with me so whenever I try to tell her about pagan or wicca or any of that kind of stuff she thinks it's all ouija boards and the dark arts twisted and say to me that it's far too gimicky! That's why I hate trying to explain it to her. My dad's even worse... If I told him about it he'd immediately get annoyed and think it's the same thing so start shouting at me saying I'm being stupid and that it's very dangerous and all that crap. You know the story. He'd be really ticked if I told him after two years! My parents hate it when I keep secrets from them... that's why I put off talking to them and do everything alone in my room. emo Edit by Mod: Please don't double post - it's against our guild rules. Instead, hit up the edit button. wink
If you're unsure of the definition of double posting, or our rules for that matter, then our Guild Guidebook should answer all your questions.XxHarryDresdenxX Aww and i was gonna post an idea for telling her...ah well i'll do it for you to tell your dad. ok, I suggest telling him like you did your mother, except tell him not that it's wicca, but a more subtle version of christianity, or just flat out say unitarian, they're hippies like us wiccans, too! =D and it's more than one religion, they're Christian, some are mormon, Jehova's witnesses, catholic, islamic, you name it. other than that, if it doesn't work, tell your dad it isn't a phase, and you are in fact neopagan. that'll confuse him (unless he's a total book worm). anyway, my parents are both pagan, except my mom's a witch. so i don't have to hide it from them. But i do have to hide it from grandma. How should i break it to her without giving her her 50th heart attack? please PM me this answer!>< cus i hate lying to my gramma bout stuff... what I'd do is instead of telling ur granny right away, just teach her about all that stuff saying it's really interesting or it's for a school project. Then one or two things might happen. Either she'll twig it first or she'll state her opinion on the subject. If her opinion is positive then that' the perfect time to break it gently. smile Good lord I wish I could follow my own advice! Edit by Mod: Please don't double post - it's against our guild rules. Instead, hit up the edit button. wink
If you're unsure of the definition of double posting, or our rules for that matter, then our Guild Guidebook should answer all your questions.dance4eva009 Thank you to everyone who posted. I have now told my mom, but not my dad...yet. We were in Sedona on our vacation last week, and that's where I told her. I started by asking her what she thought the main religeon in the area was. She said that it was probably wiccan, because there were so many new age shops. (we were near a vortex). Then I asked about what she believed about god, then asked her what she thought happened to you after you die. Next, I asked her what she thought MY religeon was...and since I was talking about wicca a little bit, she guessed wiccan...and it just went from there! She was totally fine with it. I had bought a book a few days before (Spellcraft for Teens: A Magickal Guide to Writing & Casting Spells, by Gwinevere Rain). When I bought it, I got her not to look at it by saying it was a christmas present for her. But after I told her about me being wiccan, I told her that the book I got wasn't for her. I asked her if she would like to look at it sometime, and she said that she would...but she hasn't yet. I asked her what she thought my dad would say if I told him, and she said that he would think that it was just a phase. I agree, but I also think that if he knew and I didn't tell him absolutely EVERYTHING about wicca, he would never act like he really trusted me. Well, I guess that I will cross that bridge when I come to it... Well, thanks again to everyone who posted! You had some great advice. biggrin is spellcraft for teens available in the UK? I want it!
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Posted: Sat Apr 26, 2008 7:54 pm
I would just sit her down, and calmly explain the situation to her. And your dad. That would be the best way, that way no one can get out of control as quickly.
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Posted: Mon Aug 10, 2009 9:00 pm
I also need help coming out to not only my mom but to my entire family.
My mom is pretty open minded when it comes to religion like she didn't care when I told her I was aethiest but if I were to tell her about this, well I'm pretty sure she would freak
But the rest of my family kind of went a little nuts when I told them about being aethiest (when I was aethiest) and ifI were to tell them about this they might possibly either disown me or they might try to perform an exocism on me or something HELP!!!!
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