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Whenever I see large amounts of money I go crazy, my rational brain goes out the window. Even though I started on the pill a month ago, my husband wan't to have a child now. THe sooner the better.
Let me explain.....When we did our taxes it turns out that we'll be getting enough to pay off my husbands creditcard. I was so exited that I was thinking maybe we'll buy a dishwasher or somthing handy like that, or save up money to buy a house. So when we were out and about the town I let him spend a little(because I put us on a "only essentials" budget because paying off sooner means less intrest to pay offwhich is more important than material things). Later on another outting, He want's to buy this computer game. I let him because he begs and says that he has wanted it for a very long time and it's only $10. I let him buy it because I figure that ,omg, he only likes to play one game at at time because he get's sucked into it and won't play anything else till he's finnished it. THis is great because he wont be playing Maple story and buying $25 Nexon cards at convienience stores like some people here buy Gaia Cash.
That night he goes and hangs out with "the boys" (I elect to stay home because I'm sick and not nocturnal like they are. He comes home early morning still talking loudly on the phone to one of his friends(which doesn't bother me too much) and crawls into bed.
When I wake up ,about 7am which is late for me, I notice a reciept for a $25 Nexon card along with his sandwich and drink. THis pisses me off. I'm thinking that I should hold off on having chilren till he can act like a mature grown up.



I dno't know what to do. I know this is a long post and you were expecting me to talk about children, but I'm a realist.

sometimes I think that it's a chicken and egg routine: should I make him shape up and quit spending and then plan to have a child or let myself get pregnant an maybe that will sober him up to get real.




Questions? comments?

Also my sister who got married a 3 years ago is has a 2 year old and just announced that they will be expecting in August, and that we should catch up. He really want's my niece to have a cousin.

You can always find a reason to wait if you look hard enough.

It's also dangerous to just let yourself get pregnant to try to force your husband to grow up the way you want him to. Let's face it, you guys have different idea's on spending. That's not going to change just because you have a child.

Why not try telling him that it bothered you that he spent $25 on Nexon, especiallly after he got a new game. But then you need to let it go. It wasn't like he blew $60 or more in one night.

The other thing I want to mention is, we can not control one's husband. We may want to, and sometimes they drive us nuts. But they are after all, free to make the choices they do. And given the chance, they may even suprise us.

Thanks a bunch guys!

Maybe everytime he begs I'll say that he needs to donate to the baby fund and when it reaches x amount then we can celebrate and have our own child.

but should it be like $1000 or more? less? you have kids, tell me what sounds right.

then again we want to get a house in the $350k to $400k range if possible. I just don't know how to make the priorities..... A house of that range is usually going to be a 3-4 bedroom because I want to make an investment for the future. (my 3 older sisters and I shared a 20ft square room till the oldest turned 15, then it was the 3 of us)(um..yeah. property is expensive here.)

Thanks again, we kinda decided to buy the house first so it'll be easier to babyproof the house and it would be better living conditions.