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Contents

1 ... Contents
2 ... Profile
3 ... History
4 ... Personality
5 ... Talents
6 ... Who Wants to Save the World?
7 ... RP Sample
8 ... Reserved

History

Charles was born in a small Angolan village to a pair of subsistence farmers. Their family barely got by, but they were better off than some, and as the oldest son, Charles had the privilege of being the one child whose school fees they paid. He was a serious, studious boy, and always did his best to look out for his younger brothers and sisters.

Unfortunately, all the ways the world has changed cannot blood-feuds and warfare. The great plague decimated Angola's government forces, paranoia reared its ugly head in the countryside, and violent militias formed form the chaos. Anti-government rebels invaded Charles' village when he was eleven. The soldiers took him and several other young boys away from their families at gunpoint and driven off to one of the rebel training camps. They were issued guns and machetes and told that they must fight or their families would be killed.

Charles knew what he had to do to keep his brothers and sisters safe. He had to fight and he had to kill. It started slowly, with inexperienced children like Charles mostly carrying torches and ammunition for their older comrades. But as the fighting raged on the ranks grew thinner, and by the time that Charles was thirteen, he'd made more than one kill. He deadened his emotions to get the job done, and more than one of his commanders noted that Charles employed clever, sometimes brilliant tactics to get the job done. He was one of the very few child soldiers who survived for all five years of the conflict.

Fate intervened. So did the international community. Peacekeeping forces moved in when Charles was fifteen, and as soon as Charles' village was safe, he defected from the rebel forces and ran to the nearest UN Camp. There, an aid worker took Charles in and tried to help him rehabilitate as best he could. When the aid worker tested Charles' IQ to see where he should be placed in school, he was stunned to discover that the boy's IQ was off the charts, in spite of his lack of formal education. He sent an application on Charles' behalf to the Shinkami School of Saviors.

Talents

Raiding? Pillaging? Urban combat? Guerilla warfare? If it involves killing or hurting people in creative ways, Charles has probably done it.

Charles knows what battle is like on the ground; something that few other students at Shinkami can claim. What he lacks in formal schooling he makes up for in practical combat experience. He is a skilled strategist and knows how to utilize a wide variety of weapons to their best effect, as well as how to direct other troops.

In addition to this, harsh life in the militia camps meant that Charles had to learn how to survive on his own in the bush. He has learned how to track and trap animals, to make a rudimentary living off of the land.

RP Sample

Charles always woke the earliest, showered the earliest, and dressed the earliest. By the time that the other boys in the dormitory awoke he was already doing sit-ups by his bed and getting ready for his morning run. It was important to him to get up before the sun was up. It kept him from being startled by the sounds of foreign footsteps in the hallways, and groping for a weapon that wasn't there.

This morning, however, someone had beat him to the punch.

"You're awake early," the student said, sitting on the steps of the building with a cup of coffee. Charles didn't recognize him. He was wearing an upper-year uniform. "The guys and I noticed, you do this a lot. If you're not sleeping well, I know a spell-"

Before the mage trainee knew it, he had been hauled up by his collar and shoved against the wall.

"You don't cast spells on me," Charles informed him, his voice low and cold. "Especially not that. You don't bother me, you don't touch me, you don't say my name outside business. Do you understand."

The boy nodded limply, and so Charles let him fall into a heap on the ground.

WIthout a backwards glance, he took off on his run.

First comment. : D

I think the overall concept's pretty good. At least, it's nothing like I've seen before. So originality wise, it's very good.

I think I'll just list a few suggestions that I think could be used. You are welcome to not use any of the suggestions, but please do read and think about them. :3

First of all, in the profile...the ages of incoming students are between 13-15. Charlets' falling a little off the chart, although I think downing one year should not be a major problem.

The history is what chrys called, an "epic" tale. This is very risky, since epic stories usually ends up to be overdone and...unrealistic if not done well. Now, this is not to say that you should change the story completely, but I think you should think about adding more details to the history to make it more realistic. For example, how is it that the disease had wiped out the government forces, but not the citizens? What happened to the disease during the conflict? Also, during the war, most humans are focused on fighting with the Aliens. What made the people there different and start to fight among themselves? If you meant the war to happen after the Alien invasion, then I think you should make a clear point about that in the history.

Also, I'd like to know about Charles' thought processes when he joined the rebels, then left, and then ran to the UN forces. What happened to his family? Why did he decide to go for the UN forces? He joined the army to keep his family safe, then what made his thought change and made him choose Shinkami instead? Normally, I'd think someone who cares about his family would want to stay and make sure the other family memebers are safe unless it's under forced situations.

And finally...Charles' personality worries me a little. He's not emo, but he's almost close to being one considering he's not talkative. From your RP sample I get the feeling that Charles can be aggressive, which makes it even harder to make friends. This makes me doubt his ability to interact with others, and interaction in Shinkami is very important. I think you might need to show us that he's not completely anti-social. This way we can be reassured that...you know, he doesn't end up killing one or two students during a dispute or something. XD;

That's just my thoughts for now, please do consider them, and feel free to ask if you have any questions on what I just said. :3 And yes, I could have misconceptions. If you think I misunderstood any of your points, please do tell me so I can understand. :3

Not...really? sweatdrop We do accept all types of students, as long as the story's consistent with the main plot. There's a story thread in the guild in which you can look at for main story references, see if that might help.

Personally I think it's a great concept, but it's up to you if you want to try a new one or just to improve on this one. Like I said, those are just suggestions, which I'd never give if I think the concept's not accepted in the first place.

Sorry if I made you think that. ><; *kinda feels bad now*

You know I actually liked his personality.

I understand that interacting with other people is important in the shop, but when you look around all we have a really nice people. I think that haveing someone who's a little more agressive and a little anti-social would actaully be nice.

While I know that there are a lot of child soldiers I also felt that the backstory was bordering on epic. I think it was probably just beucase of the fact that he survived for so long. Then again if he didn't he wouldn't be here. Anyway I didn't think that it quite made it to epic.

And I also don't think that he seemed emo at all. Not the type that would play nice with other, granted, but not emo. Maybe more angery than emo...