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 Posted: Thu Nov 29, 2007 3:28 pm
Ever read fanfiction? Nor do I. But my one friend does, and she finds some crazy awful s**t on fanfiction.net. Now, I admit, most of my fanfiction-writing friends have bad grammar and spelling and get mad when I point it out, but sometimes, even the bad can laugh at the worst. So, I now present to you, "My Immortal". http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2828044/1/My_ImmortalJust, read a little. Try to. You'll lawl. Then, read the reviews. All 7500 bashing the author. xd It's so bad, it's lawleriffic! NOTE: Best review I've found so far: Charles Darwin- This is the greatest scientific discovery of the century. After all these years of searching, at last we have found the missing link! I want to thank you, Miss Way, and also ask you if you will consent to come to the Galapagos so I can do some tests on you. We have so much to learn! And it's all because you wrote this! Evolution is provable at last!
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Posted: Thu Nov 29, 2007 3:40 pm
OH MY GOD.
*Reading it now*
I'm laughing SO hard right now. This is AMAZING.
heart heart heart heart heart
Edit: Some of the "typos" are just.... xd
"I ran out of the room and into the Forbidden Forest where I had lost my virility to Draco and then I started to bust into tears."
Edit2: And the chapter endings.... xd xd xd
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Posted: Thu Nov 29, 2007 4:25 pm
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Posted: Thu Nov 29, 2007 4:47 pm
 My favorite review:
"does not approve of you. look at encyclopediadramatica and search for yourself. You fail at life, your a trap and I must kill you with fire. Your level of emoness is as enterntaining as a centipede filled v****a. Cockmongler will bite your d**k off and goatse wants your head. Enjoy being saged.
m00t"
This is comedic gold.
~<3
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Posted: Thu Nov 29, 2007 4:54 pm
This reminds me of an intentionally horrible KotOR fanfic someone wrote a while ago. I should try to find it again...
But yeah, this makes me giggle. x3 FNORD
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Posted: Thu Nov 29, 2007 5:15 pm
»»»Pixie«««
My brain is so dead.
like, oh my god.
So bad.
So, so bad.
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Posted: Thu Nov 29, 2007 7:56 pm
The reviews are friggin hilarious! More so than the horrible writing itself...
o.o
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Posted: Thu Nov 29, 2007 8:22 pm
oh wow. so. horrible. Reminds me of HALF LIFE 2 FULL LIFE CONCEQUENCES. [TEXT] [Animated]
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Posted: Thu Nov 29, 2007 8:29 pm
I cracked up in chapter 4. Just the way they described it... XDD;; :still reading:
I love the comments the author makes at the beginning of the chapters ^^~
"You could only see his red whites."
XDDDDDDD;;
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Posted: Thu Nov 29, 2007 9:05 pm
Quote: I felt a little depressed then, so I slit one of my wrists. I read a depressing book while I waited for it to stop bleeding and I listened to some GC.
xd xd xd
I THINK I DIED INSIDE.
HOMG.
GC and Simple Plan are all wizards now? Thats hott.
I didnt read any of the reviews because im going to bed. And I only read to chp. 3. Imma read the rest tomorrow at work.
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Posted: Thu Nov 29, 2007 9:08 pm
Quote: Then he put his thingie into my you-know-what and we did it for the first time.
I LIED. I couldnt stop reading.
xd xd xd xd
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Posted: Thu Nov 29, 2007 9:29 pm
Nymphiedora Quote: Then he put his thingie into my you-know-what and we did it for the first time.
I LIED. I couldnt stop reading.
xd xd xd xd
»»»Pixie«««
I finished it.
She gets hacked at chapter 39.
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Posted: Thu Nov 29, 2007 9:30 pm
Nymphiedora Quote: Then he put his thingie into my you-know-what and we did it for the first time.
I LIED. I couldnt stop reading.
xd xd xd xd
Worst. Lemon. Ever. xd ... *sneaks off back to writing papers.*
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Posted: Thu Nov 29, 2007 11:16 pm
Oh, lawl. Let's point out several things...
1. Ebony= MARY FREAKING SUE. Seriously. In case you didn't know what a Mary Sue is, check Wikipedia. They even have this fanfic linked in the article. How is she a Sue? Well, the story constantly describes her, what she's wearing, and everything. She's the center of attention, no matter what. Almost every canonical character likes her, the minute they see her. She gets hooked up with Draco, who acts out of character (he's usually a bit of a jerk), and falls for her almost right away. Her name is long, fancy, and elegant, with multiple names, most of which are usually words. She is not only a witch, but a vampire, who apparently doesn't suffer from the vampiric weaknesses in that particular universe (though, while I do remember vampires being mentioned on occasion in Harry Potter, none actually showed up, to my knowledge. Though, I haven't gotten around to reading the Deathly Hallows. However, she should have at least an aversion to sunlight, repelled by garlic for whatever reason, and other typical vamp weaknesses), aside from being killed by a stake (though, just about anyone can die from that). Oh, and at one point, she gets off the hook for getting it on with Draco in the Forbidden Forest, because he "loves her". Seriously. How many teachers would let a young couple going at it on a part of the area where students are forbidden, ripping open each other's clothes, and actual penetration, not have any consequences, for that reason, or any reason, for that matter? And, clearly, Ebony is a self-insert.
2. Annoying "goth". I say "goth" in quotation marks because it isn't even like any person who is seriously into the subculture. It's way too stereotypical. She is a Satanist, hates preps, cuts herself, listens to stuff that is stereotypical, and many other things. Man, you can play "Count the Stereotypes" with this.
3. OOC. Out of character. Draco is a lovey dovey. Dumbledore swears more. Harry is apparently sleeping with Draco. Hermione gets switched to Slytherin, only because she is really a vamp, even though she is clearly Muggleborn, and clearly belongs in Gryffindor. And many other things. Oh, and they're all "goths" now. They are also vampires, apparently, as well.
4. Just plain stupid. As I said, why would they get away with going at it on a place where students are forbidden? Why wouldn't she notice the tattoo the first time she does it with him (though, it may be because of lighting)? And, even if she noticed it the first time, "Vampire" can mean anything. Heck, it could be referring to a past relationship he had, before her, or even got it because of her (she's a vamp, after all). Or, just the simple explanation that he is a fan of vampires. And, if you're two-timing, tattooing yourself with one lover's [non-canonical nick] name is a VERY bad idea. It constantly describes her wearing casual clothing around school, even though I recall that most of the time, the characters wore robes in the books. The Harry Potter characters and her have a band. Apparently, a pentagram turns into a guitar, then Draco (how in Grimm's name does he do that?!), or something along those lines. I could keep going...
I'm sorry. I just had to write out what I found wrong with this story, and I went off. XD
But, seriously, I cannot believe I read a good portion of it. @_@
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Posted: Fri Nov 30, 2007 2:57 am
»»»Pixie«««
I LIKE HOW EBONY IS SPELLED WRONG MORE THAN IT'S SPELLED RIGHT.
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