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 Posted: Wed Oct 31, 2007 1:12 pm
Good god! What do they want from me! I study for two entire (that is 8:00 in the morning to 11:00 at night) days straight and do all the work but I am still getting 50's in all my courses but one, and in that one I haven't had my mid-term yet so you can bet my mark will plummet after that. I am getting seriously depressed.
On the same topic I had someone who goes to UofT also hit on me through Facebook. That's certainly a first. "What does this have to do with being depressed?" you're thinking to yourself. Well as with all teenagers I get really horny. Sorry if I put anyone off there but it's a proven fact. Having almost gone for a discreet meeting with someone I "met" on PlentyofFish.com I have seriously thought about just relieving some stress via sex. I know many of the risks and know how dangerous that meeting someone you don't know and signing on for full-on sex can be but with my everlasting (though hidden) low self-esteem and life that seems to constantly ******** me over I have trouble seeing how it can get any worse. Sometimes I wonder whether or not this random stranger killing me would really disturb me as long as I got my kicks. Anyway, having been recently messaged by a nice-looking, hot guy saying he was interested in my offer (for a discreet meeting) I am honestly thinking I'm going to go. The stress of life it seems, has finally got to me. I haven't received his Messenger address yet so I haven't confirmed or arranged anything as of yet but I just don't know anymore. Maybe if someone just ******** all my worries away my life would be better. I oftentimes crave to part of this destructive cycle of self-pleasure that I've always been warned to stay away from. After all, if this way of life isn't working, why shouldn't I try another?
I'm sorry to have annoyed anyone with my ranting but I just needed to write this down somewhere lest my head burst. I don't usually ask but if anyone has any feedback whatsoever, ANY feedback, even if it's just to say that I'm an idiot I would greatly appreciate it. I need a supportive voice here.
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Posted: Fri Nov 02, 2007 10:01 pm
O.O I really don't think it's a good idea to do that, to be completely honest. You don't know if he has diseases.. I mean, he could have AIDS and you'd never know until you got sick from it. I don't care how much life sucks, dying from AIDS is an awful, horrific way to go. So, please please don't do that because I'd sure hate to see someone's life go down like that.
And I know exactly what you mean about having trouble seeing how it can get any worse. This may be disgustingly optimistic, but if it can't get worse it can only get better.. And I doubt life is stagnant enough to stay the same. Just push on through and you'll get a break somehow eventually.
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